The feeling of hopelessness is an experience with a complex mechanism of formation, which in its structure belongs to the spectrum of negative ones. The basis in this situation is a change in the subjective perception of the picture of the world, which is expressed by an acute sense of hopelessness. While objective reality does not meet these negative criteria.
A feeling of despair , hopelessness, occurs when an individual is faced with a number of insurmountable obstacles, or the lack of opportunity to correct what happened, which causes a feeling of despair and powerlessness. At the same time, it seems that no one can help you.
Sometimes hopelessness manifests itself when a person is deprived of hope and faith that the situation will be resolved in a different way, and believes that there is no way out. The likelihood of further actions seems meaningless to him, and with this comes the realization of the impossibility of changes in the right direction.
The inability to see a solution and a way out of the current problem gives a feeling of hopelessness. Similar to how the consequences of positive and enjoyable actions cause feelings of euphoria and joy.
*There is an opinion that hopelessness manifests itself as an option to protect the human nervous system from overload with negativity. A feeling of hopelessness helps prevent a number of erroneous actions and protects a person from making wrong decisions. The body simply blocks the flow of energy to the solution to the problem that has already been assessed by consciousness, as if it is unpromising.
What is hopelessness
The meaning of the word hopelessness can be a depressing state when a person cannot find a way out of a difficult situation.
Hopelessness is hopelessness, the impossibility of reaching the end (Dictionary of the Russian language: In 4 volumes / RAS, Institute of Linguistic Research; Edited by A. P. Evgenieva. - 4th ed., ster. - M. : Russian language; Polygraphresursy, 1999).
Rarely does a feeling of hopelessness arise on its own. A person contributes to it by driving himself into a framework, giving up, losing faith in the best. In a state of hopelessness, all events, even neutral and positive ones, take on a negative connotation.
A state of hopelessness can lead a person to tragic consequences (suicide, use of illegal substances, alcoholism, marginal lifestyle).
How hope and despair are related
There is something common between despair and hope. This is inaction. That is, both in a state of hope and in a state of despair, a person waits for good events from the outside, without making any effort for this.
For example, a woman gives birth to a child and hopes that he will take care of her, help, love, support her. The child does not do this, and as a result, the woman falls into despair and thinks what and where she did wrong, that there is no hope. This means, in her understanding, that her child is a bad person.
A person who regularly goes to a psychologist, pours out his soul and complains about life, but does nothing on his own, is also in a state of expectant despair and inaction. His choice is empty hopes, which from the outside are in no way supported by actions.
Hopelessness is when a person has passed the extreme stage of despair and has ceased to hope and believe in the best.
Dialogue on the topic of hopelessness in the video, examples and solutions.
Signs of hopelessness
Modern psychology has come to the conclusion that hopelessness is not one specific feeling. It consists of many others. If a person is in despair and hopelessness, then he has both physiological and emotional manifestations.
Features in men
If a man feels like he is in a hopeless situation, then he experiences:
A depressed mood that is not affected by life events or external circumstances.
A pessimistic view of events that will happen or may happen in the future.
A feeling of anxiety and fear that accompanies literally every event in life.
Inability to concentrate on a specific task or activity.
Lack of desire to make any, even the simplest, everyday decisions.
Insomnia or increased sleepiness, reluctance to get out of bed due to hopelessness.
Decreased or complete loss of self-esteem.
Lack of vital energy and motivation to perform any actions.
Features in women
If a woman finds herself in a hopeless situation, in her opinion, then this is expressed:
Lack of pleasant sensations from actions and events that previously brought pleasure.
Attitude to what is happening with an increased degree of pessimism.
A sharp decrease in self-esteem and self-confidence.
The desire to get stuck in monotonous work or household chores.
A gradual increase in negative emotions, an increased risk of lashing out at someone around you.
Fear of your future.
A state of impossibility of entering into the usual life schedule.
Feeling of hopelessness for children
Children can also be susceptible to feelings of hopelessness, since their psyche has not yet settled down or become stronger. For example, if a child loses a loved one, a pet, does not feel support and love from his parents, and experiences fears.
Hopelessness in a child manifests itself in specific signs:
State of regression. For example, a child who is quite capable of going to the toilet on his own begins to wet the bed. Regression can also be expressed in the condition of the fingers, the demand for increased attention from adults, and increased moodiness.
The unexpected appearance of unfounded fears. A previously calm child suddenly began to be afraid of loud noises, the dark, dogs, etc.
Increased aggressiveness. The kid began to throw toys, be rude, fight, respond sharply, and swing at other people.
Deterioration of health. Parents should be alert to intestinal problems, rashes on the body, abdominal pain, and fever.
Sleep disturbance. The child sleeps poorly, does not get enough sleep, and complains of fatigue during the day.
Decline in school performance. Hopelessness negatively affects the processes of memorization, imagination, thinking, and attention. Because of this, grades deteriorate, and teachers receive complaints about inattention and lack of diligence.
Reluctance to communicate. The child stays away from the group of peers, has stopped taking part in games, and there is a decrease in the level of discipline.
If something from the list happened only 1-2 times, then there is nothing to worry about; all people, including children, have bad days and attacks of bad mood. Parents should be alerted if symptoms persist for several weeks.
Since the child’s psyche is quite flexible and pliable, with due attention and proper rehabilitation, the child can quickly recover without the risk of relapse.
What to do if you start to feel depressed
If this is a one-time temporary condition that does not in any way affect your behavior and ability to work, then you should not pay attention to it, look for something you can switch to and the depression will go away on its own.
Most likely, the cause of such a depressed state is an external factor (stress, psychological trauma, overwork, etc.) and therefore this is a normal mental reaction that does not require treatment.
If a depressed mood lasts more than a few days, arose for no apparent external reason and affects your activities (productivity has decreased, too much stress is required to achieve normal results, absences from work or school), then you should seek help from a specialist, since, most likely All in all, this is already a painful condition.
Why do people despair - reasons for hopelessness
A state in which a person no longer has hope appears due to difficulties in life that at the moment seem irreversible.
| The reason for hopelessness. | An example from life. |
| Health problems. | A person was diagnosed with a serious illness, and he was overcome with a feeling of despair and hopelessness, fear of the situation. |
| Material difficulties. | A man accidentally flooded his neighbors below, and he had to spend a significant amount of money to pay for repairs. |
| Problems with employment. | The girl was fired from a promising job. Because of this, she has a fear of the future; she does not believe that she will soon be able to find a job that is no worse. |
| Unhappy love. | A student fell hopelessly in love with a young and handsome graduate student. He did not reciprocate her feelings, since he turned out to be married. She feels hopeless, cannot overcome despondency and refuses to believe that she will ever meet the right man. |
| Illness of a close relative, child, friend. | A woman’s father falls ill, she plunges into the abyss of hopelessness, focuses only on fatal cases of such a disease, and does not listen to doctors. |
| A series of unfortunate, negative events. | A man loses a good job, his car suffers a serious breakdown, there are disagreements with his parents, quarrels with his wife. A series of failures makes him plunge into a feeling of despair and hopelessness. |
Completion
Today we looked at how to deal with despair. I believe that every person can have a breakthrough. We ourselves can both heal and kill ourselves. If the first one is more suitable, buy yourself or brew a drink, for example, “Sbiten”, which consists of honey, healthy herbs and spices. And call it the balm of joy, happiness or health. And in the morning, pouring two spoons into hot tea, decide that you are drinking nothing more than a drink of joy, happiness or health. And behave all day according to what you are filled with. And don't forget about the sparkle. Happiness to you and all the best.
How dangerous is the state of hopelessness?
Despair causes far more problems than it seems. This condition can seriously weaken and traumatize the human psyche.
| What is the danger of hopelessness? | Why is this condition dangerous? |
| A person loses vital activity and becomes apathetic. | A person ceases to feel the strength and resources to change something, to take the situation into his own hands. |
| It deprives a person of dignity and inner core. | When a person is overwhelmed by a feeling of hopelessness and despair, he feels like a victim, and the victim does not think about his dignity, position in society and moral principles. |
| Deprives you of faith in the best. | Believing in the best is a good remedy for negative emotions, including hopelessness. As long as a person believes and hopes, he is not afraid of any despair. |
| Makes a person weak-willed. | Often the solution to a problem depends on how the person himself is disposed to it. If he is passive and not motivated to change, then the situation is initially doomed to failure. |
| It deprives you of the opportunity to think sensibly and make plans. | All people sometimes experience difficult, hopeless, tragic situations. If despair has not yet completely overwhelmed a person, then he is looking for a way out in every possible way, struggling, trying. A desperate person only complains and waits for help to come unexpectedly from outside. |
| Makes you think only about the problem and not notice anything around you. | Paradoxically, it is precisely the fixation on the problem that prevents a person from successfully solving it. The fact is that he cannot distance himself and look at what is happening from a different angle. |
| Increases negative emotions. | Negative emotions, such as fear, anger, guilt, anger, overwhelm a person and prevent him from thinking sensibly. |
| Causes a person to experience fear of events that are about to happen to him in the future. | A negative scenario in advance is frightening and requires time and effort to think through and redistribute forces and resources. Constant negative thoughts drive a person into a dead end, and in a dead end there is nothing good, which is why fear of the future appears. |
| The problem is in the person himself, but he cannot realize it. | In a state of hopelessness, a person forgets that only he is responsible for what happens to him and his life. |
| The emergence of the habit of blaming others for your failures. | When a person does not blame anyone for his failures, the level of his internal energy increases, motivation appears to solve problems and conquer new heights. |
| A person drives himself into a state of emotional vacuum. | This condition unsettles a person even more and prevents him from solving existing problems. |
How not to do stupid things out of despair
The feeling of hopelessness sometimes overwhelms a person so much that he stops thinking sensibly and can do stupid things. You can get rid of obsessive thoughts and protect yourself from stupidity in different ways:
- Just take a deep breath and then exhale. Do this exercise several times. Sometimes the brain just needs some fresh air to make a decision.
- Try not to do anything serious in a state of despair. It is advisable to rest, go to bed, and solve the problem with a fresh mind.
- Force your own brain to think in a positive way, imagine the most beautiful and positive outcome of the situation. This will improve a person's well-being.
- Talk honestly with yourself and decide what exactly will change in life if the situation is decided not in the person’s favor. Most likely, nothing major will happen, and troubles can always be solved or corrected. And if you do something stupid, the situation won't get any easier.
- Do not be afraid to ask for help from family and friends, but never descend to ordinary whining and complaints.
Have you ever done something stupid in a state of despair? Do you know how to cope with despair? Share your experience in the comments.
How to help someone who is depressed
Offer your help, try to assess the cause of suffering yourself and assess whether you need to wait out this condition or require the help of a doctor.
In some cases, you can “escape from depression” by switching to another problem or changing your attitude; in other cases, you should, on the contrary, look for the cause of depression and speculate on this topic.
Don't leave him alone with you. Be persistent if you are faced with refusal to see a specialist when your condition worsens.
Sleep disturbance and weight loss are critical indicators for arranging a consultation with a specialist. Alcohol is a bad and dangerous way to help when you feel depressed or depressed.
How to cope with the feeling of hopelessness - there is a way out
To overcome hopelessness, first of all, you need to work with yourself, with your thoughts:
- Accept the situation, understand that it has already happened, and the past cannot be corrected. But you can act in the present and try to change your future for the better. It's not a shame to admit defeat, it's a shame to do nothing.
- Give yourself the opportunity to mentally rest. You don’t need to force yourself into any kind of framework, but just do what you like. For example, eat a couple of chocolate cakes, watch a good movie, take a walk in the forest or just get a good night's sleep. The main thing is not to blame yourself for all this.
- Do not remain in a static state, provide yourself with at least minimal physical activity (walking, doing exercises, dancing to music).
- Find a goal for yourself that will distract you from gloomy thoughts and soul-searching. It’s not scary if it is everyday and not at all sublime. The main task is to keep yourself busy.
- Try to think as positively as possible and not focus on negative scenarios. If a person is focused only on the negative, then good ways to solve the problem pass by and useful advice is ignored.
- Do not worry about your problem alone, talk about it with loved ones or friends. The opportunity to speak out is already a good way to relieve yourself of the burden of despair. You don't need to be alone, but talk to someone at least once a day.
If a person understands that he cannot solve his problems on his own, then it is important to contact a psychotherapist who will help him get out of the crisis and, together with the client, will think about alternative ways to solve his problems.
Unwillingness to live and despair - what to do in case of extreme manifestations
The feeling of doom can be so strong that a person often thinks about dying. If you are thinking about suicide, you should consult a qualified psychologist or psychotherapist. You can also contact emergency psychological services anonymously by phone.
We talked in detail about methods of dealing with suicidal thoughts in an article about the reluctance to live.
Techniques used for depression
- Psychological: support, empathy and help in solving current problems from others, “compassion”, relaxation using autogenic training or similar techniques, change of environment (vacation or time off, travel, temporary relocation);
- Physical: water treatments (cold shower in the morning, warm bath in the evening), intense and regular physical activity, sound sleep for at least 8 hours, provided you fall asleep before midnight;
- Medical (only as prescribed by a doctor): pharmacotherapy, physiotherapy, diet therapy, sleep deprivation, etc.
How not to fall into despair - prevention
From constant living in despair, psychosomatic problems arise, the psyche is destroyed, and the quality of life suffers. It is necessary to prevent this condition when everything is good in life, in order to prevent a feeling of hopelessness. What is needed for this:
- Realize the need for hobbies and interests in life, and be sure to leave time for them. Hobbies fill you with energy, which is enough for all tasks.
- More new things in life, the picture should constantly change. New impressions, people, places. This mechanism is formed by evolution, and novelty helps maintain self-confidence.
- If a person is physically active, then the likelihood of feeling hopeless is noticeably reduced.
- Constantly set goals and achieve them. This fills a person with internal resources, joy, a sense of satisfaction and pride in himself.
- Help others, do not remain indifferent to someone else's misfortune. It's energizing.
What else is a good prevention of hopelessness and despair?
It is important to learn to relax, to free your head from negative thoughts (creativity, meditative practices, communication with animals, relaxation methods can help with this).
On our website there is a practice called “Yes, but”, it allows you to look at circumstances from the other side.
How to overcome the despair of lack of money
It is difficult to fight the despair of lack of money, since the modern world broadcasts the attitude that only those who have money are successful. You can do it yourself:
- Learn to spend money wisely.
- Show ingenuity and creativity. Not everything a person needs can be bought with money. You can do something with your own hands, you can repair something old, you can exchange it with someone. There are joint purchases.
- Understand that wealth is not just about money. Rich is the one who can freely manage his time. A rich person is one who has well-established social connections, etc.
- Think about what opportunities were obtained due to a lack of money (for example, the ability to sew, cook with a minimum of ingredients), and also about which of these opportunities will help improve financial well-being.
How not to despair from loneliness
Moments of despair and hopelessness in people are often associated with a feeling of loneliness. How to survive this state and not succumb to negative emotions:
- Realize that the presence or absence of a soulmate does not make a person bad or good.
- Do not meet “the first person you meet” to fill the feeling of inner emptiness.
- Analyze your condition, understand why it’s bad to be alone, what negative consequences may arise from this.
- Read more interesting books, watch quality films.
- Join a club based on your interests. Every city has development centers, coworking spaces, and studios.
- Chat online, look for friends on the Internet.
- Animals are also great friends, so it's worth considering getting a four-legged companion.
- Go for walks more often.
- Realize that a person, first of all, must be his own best friend.
Thank you for reading the article. We would like to remind you that you can find a way out of any situation, the main thing is to change the destructive feeling of hopelessness to actions towards what you want.
Repost the article, send it to your family and friends, save it for yourself so that you can return to the techniques from time to time and work through your negative feelings.
