How to achieve social success: advice from Help-Point psychologists

11/19/20205 minutes read 1587

Social success is the level of achievement recognized in a given society. A certain level of material wealth, social status and influence.

This level is significant only for a specific society in a given cultural and historical period, which makes social success a rather conditional criterion for success in life. Success is social because it has no meaning outside of society. Or it does not matter in another social class or in another country.

Social success - what is it?

What is social success of an individual? According to the dictionary, this is: luck in any business, successful achievement of a goal; recognition of such luck from others, public approval of something, someone’s achievements; public attention.

Modern society greatly encourages its members to:

striving for a goal;
adherence to certain standards and success criteria;
displaying symbols and attributes of social superiority.

But often there is a bias towards the material and financial dimension and it is forgotten that there is no one established model of social success. This is a multifaceted and multidimensional concept, including objective and subjective sides and many options for achieving it.

Charity events

The ability to empathize, the ability to empathize, is not so common today. The formation of these qualities occurs at a young age, which is why it is so important to create conditions in which the child learns to sympathize with others and provide help.

Charity events and projects are one of the most important areas of socially significant activities. They can involve teachers, schoolchildren, their parents, as well as representatives of charitable foundations, organizations, and groups of volunteers. Usually it's about helping those who need it. These could be elderly people, the sick, low-income categories of citizens, orphans, refugees, victims of natural disasters, animals, etc.

Charity school fairs, concerts, auctions and marathons are becoming traditional today to raise the necessary funds.

Components of social success

At different times and in different societies, there are clear patterns of what needs to be achieved in order to consider oneself a successful person. At the moment, in the European society, to which Russia belongs, the following components can be distinguished:

an irreplaceable specialist who can easily find a job or run his own business;
own comfortable housing (good area, new house, enough rooms for all family members);
stable high income (above the regional average);
public recognition (the work he is engaged in is recognized in society);
a person is self-realized (does what he likes);
has success with the opposite sex - knows how to please and communicates easily, knows how to build strong relationships;
confident in himself and the future;
good health, physically attractive.

Social success and social fulfillment

Social success should not be confused with social fulfillment. Although these are overlapping concepts.

- Success - the status of a person and his way of life is recognized by society and approved by it.

- Realization - a person is busy doing what he likes, can make the most of his talents and skills.

As an example: during the collapse of the Soviet Union, many scientists could not realize their talents due to incredibly low salaries, but some of them became socially successful, going into business and managing to earn a lot of money.

One of the latest studies revealed the attitude of middle managers to the concepts of “success” and “success”

Thus, 45% of managers agree that success should be assessed by the amount of material wealth, and 87.1% do not consider wealth a criterion of success at all.

Important The criterion for success is the degree of internal harmony achieved, as 84.5% of respondents think.

Level of social success

Just as at school or college there are excellent students and C students, so in adult life there are socially successful and unsuccessful people. Social success has four factors, for each of which you can give yourself a score from one to five and check what level of the social ladder you are currently at:

Money
In order to consider yourself socially accomplished, there must be a constant influx and increase in cash flow. Money making skills must also be developed. Everything can be lost, but a successful person has the ability to independently restore the desired financial level.
Status
The position of a person in society. The method of earning money does not always give the desired status. A drug dealer may be very rich, but he cannot gain respect in society, or only by hiding the true source of income.
Energy
If all your life energy is spent on making money, it is difficult to talk about personal success. A workaholic is not the same as a successful person; emotional burnout also does not contribute to a feeling of fullness in life.
Time
A successful person should have enough time for life: for travel, hobbies, children, family, for himself.

Main directions

The socially significant activities of schoolchildren today are quite diverse. During the year, dozens of projects with social overtones are implemented in schools. However, several traditional areas of work can be distinguished:

civil-patriotic;
environmental;
cultural;
charitable;
sociological;
historical;
health-saving.

Often in the organization of social practices the format of the volunteer (volunteer) movement is used. These include:

providing assistance and support to socially vulnerable groups of the population;
improvement (greening) of territories;
work with sponsored institutions (kindergartens, orphanages, nursing homes);
maintaining the work of cultural and sports institutions;
conducting public opinion polls.

Seven Habits of Socially Successful People

There are many books, trainings, articles and films on how to achieve social success, but none of them answer this main question: How? Because there is no clear answer, and there is no magic button either. Social success of an individual is a multifaceted concept and everyone goes their own way. But, we can highlight the main habits and signs of successful people, and the advice they give. There are many of them, here are seven:

Love your business, don’t strive only for financial success
Working from dawn to dusk, hating what you do, you will not come to success, only to emotional burnout. And vice versa, if you love your business, you will become successful no matter what, you will be passionate about it, interesting ideas will come to you, you will do it better than 90% of other people, and the money will come by itself. 80% of your work should be related to pleasure and only 20% of the inevitable boring routine - it won’t work at all without it.
Quote “The only path to true satisfaction is through work that you consider outstanding. And the only way for your work to be outstanding is through your love for what you do.”
Steve Jobs, founder of Apple.
Work
All successful people are hardworking, without constant hard work nothing will happen. And such hard work over a long period of time is possible only if point 1 is observed - love for your work.

Quote: “Most people miss opportunities. Because she’s sometimes dressed in overalls and looks like she’s working.”

Thomas Edison

Highlight the main thing
Most people get scattered and grab onto everything. Naturally, they achieve little of what they planned. Successful people focus on one thing at a time. There is a magic number - 10,000 hours. This is the time it takes to achieve mastery in almost any activity.
Yes, not everyone who spends 10,000 hours on something will become the best at it, but so far no one has managed to achieve the highest level of skill in less time. It seems that it takes exactly that long for the brain to absorb all the necessary information.

Ten thousand hours is about three hours of practice a day, or twenty hours a week for ten years.

Get over yourself
Your main rival is yourself. Learn to fight with yourself and defeat everyone.
— set yourself serious goals, and constantly make them more difficult as you progress.
- Set strict deadlines and stick to them.
- don’t be afraid of competitors - love them, follow them, only they will allow you to grow many times over.
Look for ideas everywhere
One head it's good, but two better. This saying suits successful people like nothing else. Neither of them is arrogant or believes that they know everything better than others. The whole world is your teacher.
Look for ideas everywhere, talk to other people, no one knows who will suddenly come up with a pearl of thought or give good advice. Remember everything you liked, rework it and implement it.
If you want social success, be useful to society
People are ready to pay any money to someone who makes their life better and solves their problems. You have to offer society something that you don't mind paying for. If you want to be successful, you need to be attentive and respectful to the needs and desires of other people and offer them the best solution. Keep your focus on people and everything will work out.

Quote: If you don't like what you get, change what you give.

Carlos Castaneda

There are no errors
All successful people have made mistakes. It’s impossible without them. But someone worries for a long time, and failure makes them stop, and someone, not paying attention, goes towards their goal, perceiving a mistake as experience and a step towards success.

Quote: I never suffered defeat. I just found 10,000 ways that don't work.

Thomas Edison

Civil-patriotic projects

Special attention is now paid to the patriotic education of the younger generation. And this is noticeably reflected in the organization of socially significant activities of a modern school. The formation of a conscious civic position, a respectful attitude towards the past and present of one’s country - these are the tasks that are reflected in the Concept of Spiritual and Moral Education. To achieve this goal, it is necessary to combine educational (thematic conversations, classroom hours) and practical (events, projects, promotions) methods. Among the possible forms of socially significant activities of a civil-patriotic orientation:

organizing search teams and working in archives;
ethnographic expeditions;
interviews with famous residents of the city (region);
collecting materials, designing exhibitions of the school museum;
conducting local history excursions;
meetings and organization of targeted assistance to veterans (combat, labor);
participation in events dedicated to Victory Day and other significant dates;
care of memorial monuments;
organization of military-patriotic sports games.

How success blinds and what to do about it

Not many people achieve social success, but even fewer can maintain it. Copper pipes bring out the worst in people, and success blinds you. We must recognize and understand that social status is not a goal after which you can stop and rest on your laurels. This is one of the milestones on your life's journey, and most often, after reaching it, you will need to work more and harder.

Here are the problems that make up the dark side of luck:

Success distracts from problems and the fact that something is going wrong.
Success can make a person self-confident and arrogant, giving a false illusion of exclusivity.
Success gives false confidence that all problems have been solved and the remaining ones are of little importance.
Success does not give time to solve accumulated problems, since all efforts are thrown into what works well.
Success has side effects in communicating with other people, family, and loved ones. That same psychology: “from rags to riches.” Often a person behaves correctly only when he is at the bottom of the social rung; after climbing up this ladder a little, he becomes arrogant and rude, believing that he can now afford to communicate with others from the height of his position.

To avoid the side effects of success, there are several factors to keep in mind:

1. Be humble, no matter what you have achieved.

2. Always look for problems that can and should be fixed.

3. Self-improvement - man is a living system, he cannot stop developing.

You have to run as fast as you can just to stay in place, and to get somewhere you have to run at least twice as fast!

“Our Home”: environmental movement

Involving schoolchildren in practical work to study and protect nature is one of the most effective forms of environmental education. As part of socially significant activities in this area, environmental culture is fostered and an active life position is formed.

The scale of environmental actions in which schoolchildren participate can vary from the school area to the district, city and region. It could be:

cleaning and garbage removal;
cleaning of parks, squares, coastal zones of reservoirs;
landscaping;
collection of waste paper, plastic, battery recycling;
saving water and electricity;
promoting a conscious attitude towards the environment (surveys, leaflets, speeches).

Help from a psychologist in developing a successful way of thinking

Psychologist Carol Dweck studies productivity and mindset, and her latest research shows that success is determined not by high intelligence, but by attitude.

Dweck identifies two types of mindsets: a fixed mindset and a growth mindset.

Psychology of Fixed Mindset,

Such people are sure that they are who they are, and it is impossible to change this. And when they encounter a problem, it creates difficulties, because they think that they cannot change something, they feel the hopelessness and enormity of the task facing them.

Psychology of Growth Mindset

These people are confident that they can cope with almost any task if they put in effort, patience and plenty of time. For them, a problem is a challenge and a task, and not a reason to give up. These people are optimistic and have positive thinking.

Once, a professor at the University of Kentucky, Susan Segerstrom, assessed the level of optimism of her students on a 5-point scale.

After 10 years, she inquired about the income level of graduates. It turned out that each point translated into a $35,000 difference in their annual earnings.

As you can see, there is nothing predetermined, and if you are currently more of a fixed mindset person, then you can change it to a positive growth mindset. To do this, you need to perform a series of exercises that psychologists advise, regularly and persistently, and in two or three months you will see that problems no longer stupefy you, and optimism has become your faithful companion.

Use reframing
Reframe all negative thoughts into positive ones, even if it sounds a little absurd - use your intellect. It is important to learn to look for the good in the bad.
Write down positive events that happened during the day.
Keep a special diary and write down every day everything that was good, and if you can’t remember anything, then write down a dream or a pleasant memory. It is important to fill the day with positivity and focus your attention on it.
Smile more often
Everything is interconnected, both thoughts and body. And one affects the other. If you consciously force yourself to smile for 10 minutes, your body will begin to produce endorphins and you will actually feel better.
Let go of the past
The practice of meditation will help with this; it will train your brain to concentrate only on what you want, without falling into negative memories. There is no need to scroll through mistakes, failures and failures in your head. Leave the past in the past.
Don't stop yourself from experiencing negativity
There is no point in suppressing negative emotions and pushing them deeper. If something really bad happens, allow yourself to worry, get angry, get irritated. Give it some time and then let it go.
Listen to upbeat music
Instead of the news, turn on positive music in the morning, dance and sing along while brushing your teeth. Music stimulates our brain and activates it.
Do things for other people
We are social creatures and it is extremely important for us to be connected to others. Being needed and useful is the best way to feel important, grow self-esteem and self-respect.
Practice Affirmations
Affirmations are short, positive statements that fill you with strength, confidence, and change the way you think. When composing affirmations, it is important to adhere to some rules:
- Don't use denial. You can’t: “I’m not sick”; you can “I’m healthy”;
- Use the present tense. You can’t: “I can handle the task”; you can: “I cope with tasks effectively”;
— Affirmations should be directed at yourself. You can’t - “My husband loves me”; you can: “I am happy in love”;
Give yourself a mini-vacation every day
Find something that brings you joy: a walk, meeting a friend, reading. Just 10-30 minutes a day when you don’t think about business and worries, but just relax and enjoy life.
Analyze
Don’t accept everything as it is, analyze both the good and the bad.
If trouble happens, try to answer the following questions in detail:
1. Why did this happen?
2. What extraneous factors or your own actions led to this?
3. What can be done to resolve the problem in general?
4. What steps should be taken in the near future?
If you want to succeed, ask yourself 4 questions:
1. Why?
2. Why not?
3. Why not me?
4. Why not right now?