There are many things that people do day after day, or in certain situations, without even thinking.
For example, in the morning we make coffee or tea, habitually take oatmeal out of the cupboard to steam and then just as habitually consume it, our thoughts wandering somewhere far away.
All these are habits. If you think about it, each of us performs large and small actions that are repeated with some frequency. They are classified as character traits, disposition and other characteristics.
Turning to scientific sources, we get the following designation: habits are rituals repeated when certain circumstances or conditions occur. It is difficult to say clearly what a habit is.
It’s much easier to give a lot of examples from yourself, your loved ones, friends, colleagues, neighbors and everyone around you.
And since each of us has quite a lot of them, we can say that they partly shape our lives. It turns out that a person's habits make his life better or worse.
This means that they need classification and more detailed consideration. By changing the rules by which we live, we can make our daily lives more positive and bring more pleasant sensations.
What is a habit and where does it come from?
Habits are not called second nature for nothing. In psychology, this definition means a characteristic form of behavior that does not require volitional and mental effort from a person.
In another way, we can say that this is a tendency towards something that has become permanent for a person. In social science, a habit is an unconscious automatic pattern of behavior that manifests itself under repeated conditions.
Humans are thought to engage in two forms of behavior:
- goal-oriented - it requires effort and control from us, forces us to think and make informed decisions, but it is easy to change if the goal changes;
- habits - such actions do not require mental and psychological costs, but it is very difficult to change an established way of life, even if a person has such a goal.
If the same action or reaction occurs under the same conditions, then a habit is formed. At the same time, a person experiences joy, peace and satisfaction. If without this action the consciousness feels uncomfortable, then the habit has already taken root. The most annoying thing is that good habits, as a rule, are more difficult to learn than bad ones.
We learn many inclinations in childhood, looking at our relatives. The fragile child's psyche cannot yet consciously filter what is worth remembering and what is better to ignore. Therefore, it is so important that the environment sets the right example for the child.
It is impossible not to touch upon the physiological side of this phenomenon. It turns out that a habit is formed neural connections in brain structures. That is, often a person simply has no choice: he becomes hostage to a certain algorithm. And therein lies the main danger. After all, when you try to violate the chosen model, the brain begins to protest in every possible way, provoking anxiety and discomfort.
The benefits and harms of habits
The benefits of habits are obvious. If we constantly had to deal with something new, our consciousness would not be able to withstand such a load. Therefore, it is definitely useful and hardly requires revision to the habit of turning off the light when leaving the room, washing your hands after visiting the toilet, or doing ten squats every day. But you need to take a closer look at some of your habits.
We will talk about seemingly completely harmless customs that do not harm anyone: going to work the same way, visiting the same stores, watching TV series on weekends.
By getting used to it, we become predictable and do not develop. A fear of change appears, and a person refuses it, even to the detriment of his interests. He may remain in an unpromising job with a tyrant boss until the end simply because he is used to it and is afraid to change something. And the helpful brain will come up with a thousand reasons to leave everything as it is.
People are manipulated using their habits. This tactic is especially often used in sales. For example, when a store opens, customers are lured with low prices, a profitable bonus system or gifts. After people get used to visiting a retail outlet, prices gradually increase, and bonuses become not so profitable. Of course, some consumers will see through the trick and leave to look for other places, but some will remain as regular customers.
You can't become a slave to your habits! You should learn to use them for your benefit and make those things automatic that are not worth the extra effort. And you should get rid of useless restrictions that hinder development, replacing them with good ones.
Personal development
If you want to be happier
- Hang out with positive people.
- Every day, write down three good things that happened to you that day.
- Laugh. Even if sometimes you force yourself to do it. Joy hormones will come in handy.
- Spend more time in the sun. Or in well-lit rooms if it’s cloudy outside.
- Move (walk or exercise) for at least 20 minutes every day.
- Walk the dog or pet an animal.
- Hug at least one person a day.
- Call an old friend or loved one.
- Devote 30 minutes of your time a day to an activity you love that brings you pleasure and relaxes you.
- Buy something new (even something small, like a new type of coffee).
If you want to manage stress better
- Breathe deeply for two minutes. Concentrate on your breathing.
- Do 10 minutes of stretching.
- Listen to something calm and distracting that doesn't relate to the source of stress.
- Snuggle up with someone close (husband or wife, friend, or even a pet). Physical contact quickly calms.
- Get rid of the source of stress for a while. Leave the meeting for five minutes or take a break from your current tasks. Just switch to something.
- Smell geranium or lavender essential oil. They lower blood pressure (can be combined with point 11).
- Sit in the sun for five minutes.
- Draw something or color a picture.
- Talk to a friend for 10 minutes.
- Dedicate 10 minutes to self-care (take a shower, get your nails done or do your hair).
- Take a nap.
- Chew some gum.
If you want to become more confident in yourself
- Write down three things you like about yourself. Then read them out loud.
- Stand up straight and lower your arms, letting them hang in a natural position.
- Wear clothes that suit you.
- Prepare for a difficult situation in which you need self-confidence. Write down your thoughts or speech and take the cheat sheet with you to the speech.
- Don't let yourself get nervous. Instead, go to a private place (such as the restroom or an adjacent room) where you can stretch and calm down. After this, concentrate on relaxation.
- Pay attention to the other person instead of feeling insecure.
- Repeat the mantra in your head.
- Make a list of things you like about yourself.
- Ask a close friend or relative to compliment you.
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