- September 26, 2019
- Psychology of Personality
- Nechitailo Oksana
Do people who are constantly late annoy you? For example, you are sitting at a planning meeting, and then a breathless employee stumbles in, clumsily mumbles an apology and plops down in his seat. Naturally, the work environment has been disrupted. Everyone pays attention to the latecomer and listens to him “there are traffic jams in the subway today.” In short, people who are constantly late cause quite expected irritation. But there are also those who always arrive on time. A person who is able to manage his time commands respect.
They have a planner and use it every day.
If you want to be on time everywhere, you should start from the moment you wake up, even if all your tasks are later in the day. The key to success is planning your day. You should look at your planner and play out in your mind what will happen during the day and in what order. Then think through each step and decide what you need to prepare to accomplish everything you have planned for the day.
Are there any downsides to punctuality?
This quality is valuable and useful, but overly punctual people often make things worse for themselves and cause negative attitudes from others:
increased demands on themselves and others, which is why they may be considered bores, pedants, boring people;
may speak unflatteringly about a latecomer, which will affect his self-esteem and relationships of people in general;
they plan their activities clearly, so they can be unsettled by any little things or unforeseen circumstances;
perceive being late as a personal insult, which is why they face misunderstandings from others;
excessive punctuality can lead to the development of neurosis;
there is a risk of beginning to show despotic behavior towards your partner, friends, and family members.
Have you ever encountered overly punctual people? What emotions do they evoke in you? Tell us in the comments.
They use buffer space
People who are never late create realistic time limits for themselves and then give themselves extra buffer space. People who are constantly late tend to underestimate the amount of time it will take them to complete a given task. Punctual people suffer from the same thing, but they recognize it and plan for the unexpected by giving themselves a little more time.
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What is punctuality
The term punctuality simply means the habit of not being late.
Punctuality is a skill, a character trait of a person, which implies the timely fulfillment of obligations and promises.
Punctual people are those people who know how to manage time wisely, take each task responsibly, meet deadlines, and think rationally and far-sightedly.
From a psychological point of view, punctuality means discipline, self-organization, respect for oneself and others.
They know how to say no
It's impossible to keep up if you're trying to do too many things. However, an excess of tasks is gradually becoming a feature of modernity, which everyone decides to simply come to terms with. But it doesn't have to be this way, and the solution is simple - learn to say no. If punctuality is important to you, don't try to fit too much into one day. Know your limits on what you can reasonably do and stick to them.
How to develop punctuality
Anyone can become punctual, because the quality is not innate, it can be developed and developed:
- Do not look for blame in surrounding and unforeseen circumstances. A punctual person worries in advance that something may go wrong, so he sets aside a reserve of time (3-5 minutes before each event).
- Record necessary tasks and meetings in a notepad or calendar. The human brain can forget this, but paper never does.
- Do not start any business shortly before leaving. Let’s say a person managed to get ready earlier; there are 7 minutes before leaving. To while away them, he goes to an entertainment site, turns on the TV or picks up a book. As a result, he forgets to keep track of time and leaves home later than planned. If you have time, it’s better to just take a quiet walk and breathe some air.
- Do a number of things in advance. For example, if a person packs a bag in the evening, prepares clothes and puts lunch in a container, it will take much less time to get ready.
- Use a little trick and move the clock forward 5 minutes, and then “forget” about it, live by it as if by an ordinary clock. This will help you always have a reserve of 5 minutes and be more punctual.
- Do not get angry or scold yourself if there is a single delay. Anything can happen in life, it is only important to warn in time and ask for forgiveness.
To understand what kind of punctuality situation you have, take a piece of paper and answer a few questions:
- What prevents me from being punctual?
- What exactly am I not punctual about and with whom?
- What can I change now?
- What actions will I take in the next month?
Have you ever had to develop punctuality in yourself? What methods and lifehacks did you use for this? Share your experience in the comments.
They only do what they like
If you're late for something, there's a chance that your brain is secretly trying to tell you that it doesn't want to do it. However, if you are late, this does not free you from the task that you do not like, it only complicates the situation, since you add slowness to all the unpleasant feelings. Solution? You should only do what you want to do.
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Consequences of unpunctuality
Many people don't take punctuality seriously. Well, nothing bad will happen if one person waits for another for 5-7 minutes. But the consequences of unpunctuality are much more serious than it might seem at first glance:
- A person who is late does not respect the person who is waiting for him. Especially when he doesn’t arrive on time regularly and doesn’t consider it necessary to warn about the delay or apologize.
- A person who is forced to wait will sooner or later feel indifference towards himself. Ultimately, a break in relationships may occur, people moving away from each other.
- An unpunctual person is unlikely to be entrusted with an important, responsible assignment that must be completed within a clearly defined time frame. The unreliability of one person can undermine the authority of the entire company or colleagues.
- It is difficult to evaluate a person who is constantly late impartially. “How can he be a legal expert if he can’t even set a reminder to leave the house early?” - the employer thinks.
- An unpunctual person may be accused of delusions of grandeur. He is not afraid to be late, because he is sure that everyone will wait, and, therefore, he considers himself superior to others. Because of such a dismissive attitude, people often turn away from an unpunctual person.
- People who do not respect other people's time only cause negative emotions: irritation, disappointment, anger.
They plan movements without taking into account time
Many people who are constantly late look at the "estimated travel time" on their GPS and think that's how long it will take them to get somewhere. However, to arrive on time, you'll need a lot more than just getting from point A to point B. In addition to how long it takes to get where you need to go and how long it will take you to get there, you need to consider other factors that take up precious hours and minutes .
The benefits of punctuality
A person who arrives on time and values other people’s time has a number of advantages:
enjoys trust and respect in the company of friends and at work;
has a high chance of career advancement;
able to take control of his own life;
he is calm inside, because he does not need to rush anywhere or worry;
usually has high self-esteem;
demonstrating one's own trustworthiness;
able to work productively.
Harriant Melot expresses the opinion that constant lateness may indicate mental problems (increased anxiety, nervous system disorder). People avoid situations that cause them stress, hence the tendency to be constantly late.
They use an alarm clock
Cell phones can be a distraction if you're engrossed in social media feeds or texting, but there are plenty of apps that can help you better manage your time. And you need to start with the simplest of these applications, namely the alarm clock. Don't set your alarm for when you need to be there, set it for when you need to be in the car with the keys in the ignition.
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What prevents you from being punctual?
Reasons why people are chronically late:
- Increased anxiety in a person. Expectations are always associated with stress, and if he comes to the meeting in advance, he will have to wait and worry. Constantly being late is a reason to protect yourself from negative emotions.
- No interest or motivation for activities. If a person experiences emotional burnout, he begins to be late for work or school, simply because he does not have the strength to go there.
- The habit of doing several things at the same time, overestimating your strength. For example, a person thinks that 5 minutes is enough to get ready, but in reality this is far from reality.
- A person has a developed pathological tendency to attract attention to himself by any means. It doesn’t matter that those waiting will get angry, but everyone will only wait for the late person and talk only about him. Most likely, such a person did not have enough parental attention and care in childhood.
- A person is facing a very serious, life-determining event. For example, he got an interview at a company where he had dreamed of working since childhood. Or he was asked out on a date by a very beautiful girl. A person takes a long time to get ready, doubts, and changes clothes several times. This requires time, so he is late.
- Unpunctual people are often immature individuals. Their parents overprotected them in childhood, controlled them, and reminded them of everything. It is now difficult for an adult to do this himself.
It also happens that unpunctual people have health problems:
- Hypodynamic syndrome. The human nervous system is inactive and does not perform proper work. Such people take a very long time to get ready, have breakfast, and cannot develop the habit of leaving the house earlier.
- Hyperactivity syndrome. The person is disinhibited, disorganized, very impulsive and forgetful. These qualities make it difficult to get ready on time. And sometimes a hyperactive person simply did not listen attentively to the interlocutor and forgot about the meeting.
- Organic disorders. They prevent a person from managing time wisely.
They think on their feet
Just because some people are always on time doesn't mean they are never late. They just know how to make up for lost time along the way. This means they know when to splurge on a taxi, or they are looking for a shortcut.
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In the end, is it good or bad to be punctual?
Punctuality is understood as a positive personality trait. In the field of work and interpersonal relationships, it is valued. People tend to form opinions and ideas about a person based on whether he is able to arrive on time and not miss deadlines.
When choosing a candidate for a position, punctuality is often a guarantee of reliability. A punctual and obliging person is more likely to be hired.
Punctuality is a positive quality, but you need to remember that everything is good in moderation. Excessive perfectionism turns a person into an anxious person, forcing him to move along the path of achieving an ideal that is essentially unattainable, and this is a disastrous endeavor.
In addition, excessive perfectionism kills punctuality. This is due to the fact that a person strives to do everything perfectly, spends more time on a task, and may begin to redo almost completed work. Because of this, deadlines will suffer, and the person can no longer be called punctual.
They respect routine
If you want to never be late, you'll need a reliable routine. It will help you become more efficient by freeing you from wasting time thinking and making decisions at every step. Instead of trying to figure out what to wear, looking for lunch in the refrigerator, and trying to find your car keys, create an evening routine in which you prepare your clothes, pack your lunch, and put your keys in the same place.
Attitudes in different cultures and countries
Attitudes towards punctuality differ in different countries and cultures, but everywhere this quality is valued.
Russia
In Russia there is no clearly formed opinion regarding lateness and punctuality. Punctuality is valued, but not always observed.
It is not uncommon to find a manager who does several things at once. His meetings are scheduled weeks in advance, and there is no guarantee that he will not be late for any of these meetings.
In the Soviet Union, in 1940, a decree was issued according to which an employee or employee does not have the right to leave the workplace on his own, and if he is late for work by more than 20 minutes, he bears criminal liability for this. In 1956 the law was repealed.
England
The British do not like to do several things at the same time, so they plan their time very clearly. For example, if an Englishman has scheduled a meeting, then it will definitely take place on time.
It is customary to invite people in advance even to events or visits. For example, an invitation to a friendly dinner is required at least 10 days in advance, and for an official meeting - at least 6 weeks in advance.
The British are confident that they have full control over their time and are responsible for planning the future.
France
In France, all meetings are divided into official and informal. For example, if we are talking about a business meeting, then you should not be late for it. And if a girl is invited to a friendly or romantic date with a man, she is allowed to be late, but no more than 10 minutes. If a girl is late for a longer time, then this is a sign that she is not interested in her gentleman.
A woman will also try not to be late for a meeting with a woman.
Japan
The Japanese do not like spontaneous meetings and unexpected decisions.
If we are talking about an official meeting, then the dates are discussed in advance. The visitor will also be asked about the purpose of the visit. Typically such agreements occur in writing.
It’s worth coming to a meeting with a Japanese person in advance. If a person is even a minute late, the Japanese will perceive this as disrespect or a personal insult, and further interaction will be jeopardized. If delays cannot be avoided, then the waiting party must be notified as early as possible.
According to the rules of Japanese etiquette, a latecomer must apologize several times and be sure to explain the reason.
Brazil
Brazilians are not used to rushing somewhere; life in the country is quite measured. For example, the head of an enterprise can come to the workplace around lunchtime, but, if necessary, stay there until late at night.
Local residents cannot boast of punctuality, but they really do not like it when people are late for meetings with them. If a foreigner is late for a meeting with a Brazilian, the latter may feel that the former does not respect him.
It is better to schedule important meetings with Brazilians in advance, about a week in advance. Brazilians decide on business issues in the first half of the day, since during lunch, even a business lunch, it is not customary for them to talk about work.
Germany
The Germans call themselves the standard of punctuality. Extreme clarity and order in everything is the motto of the residents of Germany. The Germans are so punctual that they would rather arrive at a meeting very early than allow themselves to be late.
It was German punctuality that helped this country reach a consistently high standard of living and consolidate Germany’s position in the world.
The Man Who Wasn't Late
In memory of Stanislav Govorukhin
It wasn’t me who noticed: there are people whose departure changes the world. Stanislav Sergeevich Govorukhin was one of them, he seemed to be an eternal, inescapable part, or even a dominant part of our life - cultural, intellectual, political... Films in one way or another associated with his name (director, screenwriter, actor) are unforgettable events of those ancient, Soviet years: “Vertical”, “The meeting place cannot be changed”, “Pirates of the 20th century”, “Assa”... They did not just fill the halls, they changed our views, became part of our inner world. Unlike the paintings, which were declared in advance to be masterpieces, breakthroughs and which almost immediately faded, unraveling like disposable swimsuits, Govorukhin’s films were received by dictators of taste in a completely different way. At first they were either not noticed, or were met with hostility, or, at best, they were, as it were, allowed to be present in our most important of arts. And then they somehow imperceptibly themselves became the golden fund of first Soviet and then post-Soviet cinema.
As a participant in the events, I remember well the fate of “The Voroshilov Shooter,” based on the story “Woman on Wednesdays” by Viktor Pronin. Few people will believe it now, but the press greeted the film with hostility. “He is calling Rus' to the axe!” - screamed the noted liberals, who only yesterday called to “crush the reptile” and built barricades around the White House. “This is a bad imitation of American action films about a small man with a big Colt. A Russian person should not be given a weapon, that’s enough with the pick!” – echoed hereditary film experts with three citizenships. They were infuriated by the very title of the film, as if it deliberately referred to an era they hated. But the viewer decided differently. Several years have passed, and “The Voroshilov Shooter” has become a classic; today, any time you turn on the TV and click through the channels, you will definitely come across a crying Ulyanov with an optical rifle.
– Remember, Polyakov (he always pronounced my last name with the emphasis on the second syllable), the fate of the film depends not on those who write about it, but on those who watch it...
As a professional, Govorukhin always set himself a super goal - to film at least as well as his predecessors, and, unlike others, he coped with this task. After all, filming differently than its predecessors does not at all mean filming better, but more often than not, on the contrary, worse. He remembered what a great cinema was behind him, what a demanding viewer, brought up on the highest standards, would watch his films. He understood that in modern art, exhausted by the aimless search for novelty, the main thing is to maintain the level achieved by the greats. And the hysterical shocking, mothballed avant-garde and festival elitism are something like an upward shot put.
Stanislav Govorukhin became a politician long before he found himself in the Duma. He entered the confused consciousness of his fellow citizens of the disintegrating country with the documentaries “You Can’t Live Like This,” “The Russia We Lost,” “The Hour of the Scoundrels,” “The Great Criminal Revolution.” Karen Shakhnazarov was right when he said at the funeral that the role of his film journalism in the fate of the USSR has not yet been truly comprehended. On my own behalf, I will add that Govorukhin’s film journalism was based on the literary journalism of those years, on the work of such writers as Vladimir Soloukhin, Vasily Belov, Valentin Rasputin, whose ideas he knew, appreciated and actively used in his work. His iconic films show how our public consciousness sobered up and moved from a disgusted rejection of the “soviet”, the idealization of pre-revolutionary Russia to an understanding of the monstrous mistake - the repeated breakdown of civilization for the sake of vague ideas and ill-conceived goals. As a result, we again got talkers, renegades, amateurs and thieves feasting on the ruins, who should be in prison. I sometimes think: Govorukhin sobered up so quickly after the country (“You can’t live like that” from the “Great Criminal Revolution” is only five years apart) or, on the contrary, the country shook off the destructive dark after Govorukhin and his like-minded people, such as Maksimov , Zinoviev, Solzhenitsyn...
I think it is deeply symbolic that the last film, the master’s farewell to his viewer who is fading into oblivion, was a film about a “gone nature” - “The End of a Beautiful Era.”
– Stanislav Sergeevich, why Dovlatov? – I asked with well-known writer’s jealousy when he started filming “Compromise.” - It’s not a great literature...
- No, Polyakov, you’re mistaken, great one! No one could, like Dovlatov, capture, albeit involuntarily, because of what nonsense we were offended by the Soviet regime, how we hated it because of our own mediocrity or weakness, how we dreamed of going to a place where no one needed us. Compared to what happened after 1991, this was a low-security resort... This is what I will make a movie about!
An excellent writer himself, Govorukhin was a voracious and very attentive reader, he did not miss a single new release, shaming me for my inattention to the works of my contemporaries:
- Well, yes, you are a writer, not a reader...
– Stanislav Sergeevich, I can’t read this – it’s melancholy.
– What’s true is true, but you have to force yourself, otherwise you’ll miss the new Chekhov!
- Well, if a new Chekhov appears, you’ll tell me?
- I'll tell you...
Note that most of Govorukhin’s films are based on good literature: Daniel Defoe, Jules Verne, Mark Twain, Agatha Christie, the Weiner brothers, I. Grekova, Vladimir Dudintsev... He understood perfectly well: the word, being the main thing in cinema, thanks to such “amplifiers” like acting, directorial skills, music, the magic of the frame - has a resource that is incomparable to a book in terms of power, scope and influence on minds. He tried to return the social responsibility that distinguished censored Soviet art to the “new cinema”, which received imaginable and unimaginable freedoms, but somehow immediately cooled towards the coveted truth of life.
After finishing work on “The Voroshilov Shooter,” Ulyanov asked:
– Write for Vakhtangovsky something like “Voroshilovsky shooter!”
– What, Mikhail Alexandrovich, are there completely no playwrights?
- No, unfortunately, they carry heaps of stuff, but there’s nothing to put up: swear words, trash, dirt, and most importantly - everything is done badly, hack work. Write me a good Soviet play, but only about today...
We had barely sat down to work and sketched out the first draft when big politics intervened: Govorukhin entered the 2000 presidential race, and I turned from a co-author into a confidant of the presidential candidate. Of course, he understood that it was useless to compete with Vladimir Putin. The point of participation was to take advantage of the media opportunities of the race to convey to the people, the ruling elite, and the main rival what the film “Voroshilov’s Shooter” was about - we can’t live like this any longer. But now it was not about the Soviet government, which was somehow implementing its futurological project, but about Yeltsin’s course, which resembled a “drunk ship” heading straight for the reefs. After all, many then were sure that everything would remain as before, “as under grandfather.” The fact that the country has moved in a different direction is also due to Govorukhin, whose position turned out to be consonant with the plans of his opponent in the elections, Putin. And it is not by chance that the president in 2011 invited Stanislav Sergeevich to head his election headquarters. For me this is a symbolic, if not sacred, gesture.
When the results of the 2000 elections became known - half a percent - Govorukhin said:
– Well, that’s what needed to be proven. Now let's get down to business!
And we returned to the play, which was called “Smotriny”. Mikhail Ulyanov, after reading the text, sighed: “They won’t understand! – and nodded his head towards the Kremlin, located a kilometer from the Vakhtangov Theater. The Kremlin weather vanes were still looking in different directions. Our piece seemed too sharp, even offensive, to other friends of Govorukhin - artistic directors of academic theaters located within walking distance from the Kremlin. Only Tatyana Doronina dared, although she did not find the play tough enough. At night, on the eve of the premiere, Govorukhin, who himself staged “Smotriny” (this was his first theatrical work), called me:
- Polyakov, you and I are two m...kas, I’m old, and you’re younger. We don't have an ending...
- How is it not, but the outcome of the plot?
– There is no last line! Shot! And in the theater, what is most important? That's right, word!
In the morning he was already rehearsing a new ending, and you can still hear these words, shooting into the audience, from the stage of the Gorky Moscow Art Theater, where “Smotriny” under the name “Control Shot” has been running for seventeen years...
In Govorukhin, who was extremely busy with cinematic, artistic, political, parliamentary, people's front, social, charitable and other affairs, I was always struck by his stately leisurelyness, as if he was not from our delayed life, but played a role in a film filmed in rapid, about some special world. There, according to the director’s plan, time does not rush a person into an unknown darkness, but, on the contrary, obeys his leisurely aristocratic will.
– Stanislav Sergeevich, it’s time for us to bow. Name!
- Wait a minute! - He calmly puffs on his pipe, finishing a blitz chess game behind the scenes.
– Stanislav Sergeevich, we’ll be late!
- Don't fuss! He who is not in a hurry is not late. Well, okay... - He agrees to a draw, slowly stands up and puts the smoking pipe in the breast pocket of his tweed jacket.
- Stanislav Sergeevich, burn the lining!
- You don’t understand a damn thing, Polyakov, either about the theater or smoking! Remember: if you don’t take a puff, the pipe goes out on its own... - and, shaking his shoulders, he slowly walks onto the stage to applause.
“He’s lying,” his wife Galina whispers confidentially in my ear. – It’s scary to say how many jackets I’ve ruined!
That’s all, Stanislav Sergeevich, now you are where manuscripts don’t burn, films and people don’t age, paintings hang without a nail, friends don’t betray, women don’t cheat, inspiration doesn’t dry up, and burning pipes don’t burn through tweed jackets. Farewell!
Yuri Polyakov,
your co-author
They are silent at planning meetings
There are always two types of subordinates in meetings. The first never have their own opinion and follow the majority. The latter have their own point of view on any matter.
For the first type of subordinate, the problem is the lack of courage to express their own opinion. They constantly have to be pushed. If this does not lead to any result, it is important that such an employee remains cooperative and follows every decision made as much as possible.
Meanwhile, a decrease in enthusiasm for work lies at the heart of the problem of subordinates who have ceased to express themselves at planning meetings and meetings. If the cause of this decline in morale can be overcome, the spirit will also return and the voice of the subordinate who has lost enthusiasm will be heard again.
We want to do everything at the same time.
We start doing one thing and if you ask us to help you, we will immediately switch to you and then go back to what we are doing. But between the switches, we usually lose track of time, and that's when we start to panic, knowing that we've done it again.
The biggest curse of being a tip optimist is that everything has to be done in a certain order. So, if your morning routine includes brushing your teeth, getting dressed, eating breakfast, and making coffee, you'll have to stick to it, no matter the consequences.
We just can't skip making our coffee because it's part of our ritual and no matter how late we get, we just can't fight the urge to finish everything we imagine in advance. And we know it's stupid, but that's just how we work.
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