Pride: what it is, reasons, differences from “pride”

Author of the material:

Inna Trofimova

writer, psychologist, gestalt therapist

In our time, the concepts of pride in religion and in everyday life have greatly diverged in their meaning. It seems that pride and dignity are one and the same, and humility comes from a lack of willpower. But in the Holy Scriptures, pride and ambition belong to dangerous vices that kill virtues. And yet, is being proud of yourself good or bad? How to detect signs of pride in yourself and use them for self-development? Perhaps pride has a reverse side, which is not opposed, but favorably complements this emotion.

What is pride?

Pride is a deep feeling of satisfaction and joy experienced by a person from the awareness of both one’s own and others’ positive qualities, talents, as well as successes and achievements in a certain field of activity.
In a figurative sense, this term means the individual’s satisfaction with himself for the personal achievements received and efforts made, briefly expressed by phrases like “I’m proud of myself,” etc. In addition, a person can be proud not only of his own personal achievements, but also of the successes of his family members , the results shown by his work team or favorite sports team, and sometimes the whole country.

There are two shades of pride:

• When pride is mentioned as a positive trait of human character, the self-esteem of an individual comes to the fore, as well as the presence of certain talents and skills, high professional and moral qualities that this individual strives to meet.
• When pride is mentioned as a negative character trait, we are talking, first of all, about inflated self-esteem and the desire to constantly demonstrate one’s own superiority over others, often reaching the point of outright contempt for them. It is this type of pride that is most often called arrogance.

Crown of Virtue

Psychology has only recently turned to the study of pride - until recently it was not considered a basic feeling, despite the fact that Aristotle called it “the crown of virtue.”

In 2005-2006, psychologist Jessica Tracy from the University of British Columbia (Canada) made pride the subject of her research. Among other things, she found out that it is an evolutionary emotion. This means that all people experience it the same way, regardless of ethnicity and living conditions.

Both in the village and in the metropolis, pride is described in the same way; everywhere its manifestation is straightened shoulders, a raised chin, a slight smile. Even those who were blind from birth - that is, those who could not see someone else's facial expression and copy it - in moments of pride look exactly the same as other people.

Jessica Tracy also found that pride does not equal joy or happiness. This is a subjective assessment of one's own social status.

Causes

The main reason for the emergence of pride as a character trait is a person’s completely natural desire to receive pleasure. Pride allows an individual to emphasize his superiority in a certain quality or area of ​​activity, thereby feeling better than others in some way. Often a person wants to prove to others that he has certain exceptional qualities, both real and imaginary, and in this case pride is no longer an attempt to gain some kind of pleasure from contemplating his own superiority, but serves as a means of increasing self-esteem.

And sometimes pride is also a means of hiding personal shortcomings; it allows a person to disguise his inability to fully accept himself as a person. Replacing shortcomings with advantages (often non-existent in reality), the individual strives not so much for self-affirmation as for acceptance by others as another person invented by him, possessing the necessary, in his opinion, set of personal qualities. Thus, he wants to receive self-respect from acquaintances and colleagues, which, at the same time, he himself lacks.

Efforts and achievements

I suggest you conduct a small experiment right now. Read the two sentences slowly and pay attention to your feelings.

1. Well done for reading this article. Remember what kind of internal response this sentence evokes in you, and take a short pause before reading the second one. Done? Then let's move on.

2. I'm proud of you. You took the time to read a serious article and learn something new about yourself. Notice how you feel now.

Compare two experiences - the first and the second.

When I conduct this little experiment in the classroom (in this case I usually say “You’re great for getting together” and “I’m proud of you - you didn’t go to have fun, but came to a lecture/seminar to learn”), then in the first case they say usually, the pleasure was quick and there was some embarrassment or displeasure from the assessment (“well done”), while in the second case the pleasure was deeper, because there was recognition of merit, an assessment of the efforts made.

Pride: is it good or bad?

When an individual openly exalts himself, his pride is always perceived by people as a negative quality, destructive for the personality of such a proud person. But often, especially if a person does not have a disdainful attitude towards others, the described character trait is classified as a positive quality.

In essence, both of the above characteristics of pride are fundamentally different concepts. Thus, the first option clearly implies exaltation of one’s own “I” and open disdain for other people, which is always perceived extremely negatively. But the second meaning of the term “pride”, revealed a little higher, is devoid of any disdain, arrogance and arrogance, and therefore is perceived as a positive character trait. The owner of this trait is proud not only of his achievements, but also of the successes of people close to him; he is proud of his hometown, country, etc.

Notes

Wikiquote has quotations related to Pride

1. Based on the definition of emotions in the article by Alexey Nikolaevich Leontyev.
   [flogiston.ru/library/leontev
   Needs, motives and emotions
   ] (Russian). - Moscow, 1971.
2. Ozhegov S.I., Shvedova N.Yu.
   Pride // [dic.academic.ru/dic.nsf/ogegova/40886 Explanatory dictionary of the Russian language: 80,000 words and phraseological expressions] / Russian Academy of Sciences. Institute of Russian Language named after. V. V. Vinogradova. — 4th ed., supplemented. - M.: Azbukovnik, 1999. - 944 p. — ISBN 5-89285-003-X..
3. [www.onlinedics.ru/slovar/ojegov/g/gordost.html Pride, what is gordost meaning and interpretation of the word, definition of the term :: OnlineDics.ru]
4. [www.mirslovozhegova.ru/show_termin/51152/ pride, pride, / Ozhegov’s world of words - Ozhegov’s dictionary, definition of words according to Ozhegov]
5. [www.harakter.info/index.php/chto-takoe-kharakter?layout=edit&id=18 Character development. Alexey Chichin]
6. ↑ 12
   [www.terme.ru/dictionary/188/word/gordost-gordynja tsnpdnyare (tsnpdshm)]
7. [ancientrome.ru/publik/article.htm?a=1293240187 Borukhovich V. G. Scientific and literary significance of the work of Herodotus]
8. Rome. 11:20.
9. 1 Pet. 5:5. Tzh. Prov. 8:13, Prov. 11:2.
10. [www.slovardalja.net/word.php?wordid=5899 Explanatory dictionary of the living Great Russian language - Proud].
11. [www.bibliotekar.ru/encSlov/19/23.htm The Soviets have their own pride. Mayakovsky]

Differences between pride and arrogance

The basis of the feeling of pride is pleasure and joy from one’s own or others’ accomplishments, achievements and qualities. In contrast to pride, pride is based on belittling others, narcissism and selfishness, inflated self-esteem and unceremonious behavior. Consequently, pride does not at all prevent an individual from sincerely rejoicing in the successes of others, but pride, on the contrary, encourages lower human qualities , develops envy, arrogance and schadenfreude, it prevents the individual from interacting normally with other people.

The main signs of pride are:

• openly contemptuous attitude towards people who do not occupy such a high position in society, arrogance, arrogance and arrogance, a painful desire to dominate others, inflated self-esteem;
• the desire to get what you want and satisfy your own ambitions, without regard for the norms of morality and morality, the individual achieving his goals by infringing on the interests of others;
• naked selfishness, combined with rudeness, bad manners, impudence and arrogance;
• excessive boastfulness, provoked by a desire to extort recognition of one’s own importance and originality from others;
• tendency to excessive narcissism;
• an attempt to rise by constantly humiliating others.

Links

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  	Affects	Fear · Panic · Terror · Euphoria · Ecstasy · Rage
  	Moods	Boredom · Dejection · Hypotymia · Hyperthymia

How to get rid of pride?

The negative consequences of pride are problems in personal and work relationships, conflicts with relatives and friends, misunderstanding, and often open rejection of a person prone to pride by others. Therefore, it is important to identify this negative trait in yourself in time, after which you can try to eradicate it. And to successfully combat pride, you should use the practice-tested advice of experts, which are given below:

• Give yourself the right to make mistakes. Many people are too afraid to appear in an unsightly light in front of the people around them, which is why they become overly keen on showing off themselves, often crossing the line of reason in an effort to please others. Remember that the opinions of strangers do not have the slightest impact on your life and its quality;
• Take into account the fact that there are people inferior to you in terms of personal qualities and merits, but there are also those who are superior to you. This is normal, and therefore you shouldn’t get too hung up on other people’s positive qualities, or even envy them. A much more correct solution would be to try to adopt the positive qualities of another person, for example, the professional skills of your colleague, while raising the level of your professionalism;
• Learn to listen and understand other people, this will allow you not only to understand the motives of their actions and behavior, but also to better understand yourself;
• Don't dwell on grievances. In essence, the concept of offense is very subjective and no one but ourselves is capable of offending us. In addition, excessive focus on grievances entails the development of such an unpleasant trait as rancor, and this is always the basis for pride ;
• When implementing your own plans, do not be guided by other people’s, and often also alien to you, attitudes, do not put yourself in the framework and conditions imposed on you from the outside. Start solely from your own needs and look for your own, individual way to resolve the issues and problems that arise.

A question of motivation

Among the experiments conducted by Jessica Tracy was this: in two groups, volunteers were asked to solve problems on spatial perception. Then the first group was given the test results, they were all the same: 94 points. The second group was given the same results, but with the words: “This is an amazing result, few people manage to do tasks so well.”

After this, the participants were asked to continue testing, and the researchers measured the effort they put into solving the problems. Those who heard words of recognition put in 40% more effort than those who simply received a high result. Conclusion: Pride motivates us to put effort into something.

Generosity and Anxiety

Those who feel proud increase their status in this way - but at the same time they are ready to share their own success with others, and this is reflected in their behavior. And arrogant pride is built on intimidation, dominance, and submission.

We can easily see this with examples, recalling our years of study. Among your teachers there were probably both those who felt proud of their knowledge and were ready to generously share it, and those who were arrogant with their students, intimidated them with bad grades and forced them to cram in their textbook. There is no doubt that the material is absorbed better in the first case.

True pride reduces anxiety because those experiencing it want to help others and receive more social support in return. Arrogant people are anxious: they have to maintain the illusion of competence and control, and defend their illusory position.

There is a difference at the level of hormones. Arrogant people have high testosterone levels, while “proud” people have lower testosterone and higher serotonin, which means better mood, appetite, and libido. The latter are happier people, even at the hormonal level.