According to many modern young ladies, manners and etiquette are a relic of the past, and the current era dictates completely new rules of behavior in society. For example, just as they used to care about the reputation of a modest and discreet lady, now it is important to maintain an active account on Instagram and often post “confirmations” of your beauty there. And the grooms of the 21st century no longer care at all about the maidenhood of their future wife, but are much more interested in the dowry. Why did it happen so? Does this situation in society have a positive effect on growing girls?
It is difficult to give a positive answer to the last question. Still, what makes a real “young lady” is her refined manners and good upbringing, which does not allow her to squirm in public or take pictures of food in a restaurant - let others choke on drool on the other side of the monitor. Therefore, girls urgently need to be reminded of the basic truths! Much has already been written about the rules of digital etiquette, but we must not forget about the most basic rules of behavior in society for a real lady.
Here are seven main points, without which you can’t go anywhere, because they boldly push any beauty and condition into the background.
A well-mannered girl watches her speech
She is not stingy with words of politeness, praise and good wishes, but avoids abuse, lies and dissatisfaction. She uses flattery very carefully and when absolutely necessary - a sincere compliment is valued much more. Also, a lady will never start rumors behind someone's back!
Her speech is literate both orally and in writing; she is confident in her erudition and proves it in practice. She has no reason to bring up “dangerous” topics (religion, politics, health) during a conversation, and she also does not talk about what she does not know. The lady is gradually getting rid of parasitic words.
How can a man raise an excellent wife from his beloved?
I was asked a question from a woman: “Can a man make his wife a real housewife, a caretaker, a keeper of the hearth, soft and pliable, supportive in everything, endlessly faithful, happy, relaxed, smiling, rejoicing woman? Is this possible? Or does it all depend only on women?”
My answer: yes, sometimes it is possible. Conditions:
For a man, this woman is not one of many, but a beloved one. Changing yourself means giving up your past self in some way, and then a woman should know well why she needs it. She will agree to change herself if she understands and feels that not only is she giving up something, but also how much she is gaining. And most importantly, she gains - for many years! - a worthy man who really loves her.
A man knows how to love. He raises her not just for his own convenience, but by caring about her, about her future and her happiness. Women sometimes tend to scold themselves - he will stop her from doing this and teach her to respect and appreciate herself. It can be difficult for women to remember their own obligations - he will be her memory and her support, he will help her do what she wants from herself and what they want together.
Film "What a Wife Should Be"
Show "Best of All".
The man knows how to lead. That is, never swear or reproach, but do two main things: support and give clear hints and instructions. If everything is in order, the man looks at his beloved and openly admires her. If something is not right, he says that we need to do something else or differently.
What’s important is that this is not just any kind of man, this is a worthwhile man whom a woman will hold on to. This is not just a standing man, this is a real man. He is fine with his mind, appearance, status and salary, he is a good lover and friend, an excellent father - in short, a woman has something to lose in the choice “With or without him.”
And this man is not afraid to demand from his beloved. Demand only reasonable things and only in appropriate circumstances, but demand and ensure that this is done. He is ready to discuss his demands, he is ready to explain why this is necessary, but if he decides to demand, it will not resolve, it must simply be accepted and not butt heads.
Yes, and the requirements imply strict measures in case of non-compliance. Love is love, but you need to behave properly. It is in order for love to last forever that it is necessary to ensure that both spouses behave in a decent manner and keep themselves within limits. A real man loves his wife, is ready to pay the highest rate for life with her, but if his wife (suddenly) ceases to be the one he loves, he is ready to part with her. This is an extreme measure, but he is ready for it, and the breakup does not frighten him so much that he stops following reasonable rules in the family.
In Meshchera, an intelligent, talented and very charismatic young man approached me with a question: I want to introduce the Family Constitution into the family, I want to start living in a new way, introduce new rules, but my wife resists (they say, why is this necessary). What should I, an advanced person, do?
My answer:
First. Be the perfect husband. Golden man. So that there is nothing to complain about. Can you? Live like this for a week or two, preferably a month.
Second. After this, say as the head of the family: “My beloved wife, I want our family to have the following rules from now on... I want to live in a family in which mutual respect and support reigns, in which... (we list). I don't intend to live any other way. Can we make such a family? Where do we start?
If a woman is smart, she will listen and agree.
If a man is a worthy and reasonable person, then the woman next to him is not just any kind, but reasonable, and, in particular, this means that she is ready to obey the man. As a self-respecting woman, she will not do this thoughtlessly, but after talking and understanding: why this is expected of her and what exactly her husband asks. On the other hand, if it is necessary, she will do it, that he is expected of her not only sometimes and according to her mood, but always when necessary. She will obey her husband seriously, just like people behave at work.
Under these conditions, they will succeed: he will be a happy husband, and she will be the best and most beloved wife in the world. And if they are still familiar with what Distance is, it will be easier and faster for them. Those who are familiar with Distance know how to work well on themselves, they know how to work smartly and honestly.
If all these conditions are met, yes, everything can work out for them and, most likely, it will work out. Yes, if you are not yet on the Distance, I recommend it!
Video from Yana Schastie: interview with psychology professor N.I. Kozlov
Topics of conversation: What kind of woman do you need to be to get married successfully? How many times do men get married? Why are there not enough normal men? Childfree. Parenting. What is love? A fairy tale that could not have happened better. Payment for the opportunity to be near a beautiful woman.
Plaster
Fascinated by external signs, our heroines love to paint themselves with different bright colors. The abundance of shadows, foundation, blush and some other makeup in all points of the face makes them unrecognizable. Red lips and long arrows don’t suit all ladies, but the girls don’t seem to understand this.
Keep the image of an alpha in your head. Skeptically note that with such lips she looks like your Russian teacher, only the purple bun is missing. A couple of such obscene comments, and you will notice that she began to improve and left vulgar makeup in the past. Don’t forget to reinforce your success with a carrot - say that this way she emphasizes her natural beauty and blah blah blah.
The other side of the coin is that the girl completely ignores cosmetics, hygiene rules and does not want to shave her bikini area. She believes that she is already beautiful without makeup, and ethnic clothes, strange baubles and huge earrings make her original. But none of this is true. Cosmetics, clothes, a razor, a gym and a diet only improve a lady. First, get it into her head that this way she will not lose her incredible individuality, but will acquire the special charm of Marilyn Monroe or Leni Riefenstein (well, or Faina Ranevskaya, at worst).
Tell me that the famous platinum blonde Norma Jeane Mortenson also squatted with a barbell for beautiful buttocks. Hearing familiar names, the lady will begin to take care of herself. Add a couple of cynical comments to speed up the process.
The most famous methods of male manipulation
It is not difficult to fall under the influence of a manipulator, especially for girls with a soft character. This is a real find, from which you can mold any figure you like .
Men's manipulations in relationships manifest themselves in different ways, and accordingly, the results also differ from each other.
Impact of humiliation
Instead of compliments and beautiful words, a girl often hears complaints and dissatisfaction with her appearance. The man even compares her with other ladies, focusing on their superiority.
Daily absorbing negative information, a woman turns into a complex and insecure girl, considering herself woven from solid negatives. She becomes grateful to the man for tolerating her shortcomings, although in fact the problems are imaginary.
Reward for Waiting
In order to upset a woman’s emotional balance, the manipulator periodically disappears without bothering to warn about his whereabouts. Doesn't answer calls, ignores SMS, doesn't call back. And after a long wait, he returns again and thanks for your patience with his short attention.
Waiting for sympathy
Inventing stories of his life with a sad ending, a man tries to put pressure on the feeling of pity, hoping to hear comforting words and receive sympathy. Listening to the manipulator's tales, many girls are even ready to give themselves to the unfortunate man, just so that their soul does not hurt, and those who are too gullible are ready to support even financially.
Keeps you on a short leash
The method is based on creating the illusion of presence. Communication usually takes place over the phone, through calls or messages. The conversation has a bright emotional coloring, so there is an effect of complete mutual understanding. Such relationships are initially considered unpromising.
Changing the topic of conversation
The method is used when a man’s pride does not allow him to admit a mistake, and strong arguments in his defense have already ended. This is how the manipulator presents himself as a good person trying to avoid conflict. A woman in this situation is presented as a hysterical woman, always trying to quarrel.
Frustration Manipulation
No matter how hard a woman tries to please a man, he will find any clue to find fault and make a remark. As if disappointed in his lady, he will defiantly puff out his cheeks and wait for the girl to start fussing around him regularly, not realizing what she did wrong.
Mood swings
From an attentive and caring person, the manipulator at any moment turns into a cold-blooded and insensitive egoist. Reproaching his beloved for all her troubles and pouring a stream of unpleasant words on her, he frees his soul from negativity and again turns into white and fluffy.
Lack of Interest Manipulation
By demonstrating indifference to everything that interests a girl, a man tries to persuade him. The victim, not understanding the cunning plan of her beloved, proves in every possible way that her proposals are really interesting. As a result, the persuasion turns out to be not in vain. The man gives up, having received the reward in the best possible way.
Provocation by conflict
An incorrect answer, any step to the side or an action taken independently without the man’s consent is fraught with a huge scandal on the part of the manipulator. In order to avoid a repetition of the conflict, an already obedient lady will prefer to be guided by the opinion of her lover.
Attraction and withdrawal technique
Manipulation of a man to attract or push away in a relationship is considered one of the most effective.
When interest in the other half is lost or communication has reached a dead end, the manipulator begins to act. Having skillfully interested the lady at the right moment, he quietly shifts all obligations onto her fragile shoulders, waiting for further actions.
After a short period of withdrawal, he again allows you to get closer, rewarding with his presence for persistent efforts.
Playing with feelings can happen more than once, because in this case, what is important to a man is not the result, but the process itself.
More attention5
Many girls begin to “show their claws” when they do not receive additional attention from their loved one. And it is through their whims that they attract his gaze and try to steal at least a couple more minutes of his precious time. If you understand this yourself, but cannot do anything, go another way:
- Give gifts more often than usual, this will cool down your beloved's ardor a little. You know that all girls love attention. Even if it is not an expensive decoration, but a simple keychain, you need to present it correctly. Say that this will be her talisman while you are at work/hunting/fishing and so on.
- More sex! If a lady does not feel satisfied in sex, then she will be angry and forever dissatisfied. Stop citing fatigue and eternal problems, make sure your loved one is happy.
- Call more often, don't let the girl get too bored.
This is how simple, not expensive, you can appease any, even the most capricious girl.
Is it possible to change a person?2
Men who are older than their chosen one have the greatest chance of success. On a subconscious level, a woman feels guarded by an adult and becomes like a child. That is why many wealthy representatives of the stronger sex choose young girlfriends for themselves; it is easier to deal with them in terms of re-education.
If the girl is older than the guy, then subconsciously she will take custody. In this case, no matter how hard a man tries, he is unlikely to be able to change the character of his chosen one. In such a relationship, the child is the child, and one must fear for the well-being of one’s own character.
In general, if a person loves, then he will definitely try to change, understanding his shortcomings. But we can say the other way around: if you love, then you will also love a restless disposition, and you will never try to change anything about your loved one.
If you are sure that there is no other way out for the relationship, and are thinking about how to change the girl’s character, then be sure to try it. How? We'll tell you.
How to put a presumptuous girl in her place
Depending on the reasons for the manifestation of aggression, the man’s actions will differ. It is easier to put a girl in her place in a relationship at the stage of its inception. It is easier to prevent a problem than to deal with the consequences.
Become a leader in a couple
A leadership position will help you not to bend to the girl’s interests and not to break your authority in relationships. Status should be achieved from the first meetings. Decision-making should remain with the man, even if there was a joint discussion of all the pros and cons - the last decisive word should always be with the guy.
The leader protects the interests of the couple, defends boundaries and takes responsibility for material well-being. A woman should not be allowed to always feel stronger, richer and smarter.
Show disappointment and coldness
Some changes will help to bend an arrogant girl in a relationship. The classic of the genre is to establish a distance. You should distance yourself from your partner, remain indifferent to the lady, the girl’s interests and emotions.
A woman who requires attention will change tactics and begin to show concern, try to captivate a man and arouse his former interest. It is worth being patient, because the process takes place in several stages.
At first, a lady may make trouble more often and express her dissatisfaction with the man’s behavior. It is important not to give in to emotions and not react to aggression in order to bend the girl in a relationship to yourself. Only calm indifference can push a companion to the next stage - reverse tactics. Any reaction to scandals (positive or negative) will stop the process of “re-education”.
Make you jealous
Competition is the best incentive for development. Compliments, ambiguous conversations and messages, interested glances at other ladies will confuse your partner, and will also allow you to put the girl in her place in the relationship. And if you emphasize the shortcomings of your passion, then your companion will subconsciously begin to work on correcting them in order to be the best for her man.
It is important not to overdo it, so as not to lead to separation. In case of reconciliation, the partner will find himself in the position of “guilty” and will be forced to make up for his mistake, and this only contradicts the goal. Moderate use of jealousy as a means of manipulation saved more than 35% of couples.
Special point about fitness TP
Gyms are filled with girls who have learned that a healthy lifestyle is fashionable. Many of them realized that fitness is a truly effective way to save their figure, but TPs succumbed to the spirit of the times.
For the sake of the victory of good, convince your lady that doing a platform press with five kilograms of load a hundred times in three sets is a very bad thing. First of all, it's useless. Secondly, it will not overpump. Never ever! A woman needs to try very hard for this. Show photos of famous fitness babes and girls doing crossfit. They are not shy about squatting heavy weights, and their figures are great! Don't forget to add that she succumbed to the wrong fashion. This must be done gently, like any persuasion process on this list.
Tags: education • girls • women • intelligence • interesting • positive • psychology • advice
Ask men for help
By mouth. Not with a blowjob, but with words, if you didn’t understand me right away. It’s not easy when you’re used to carrying everything on yourself, but you won’t be able to become feminine any other way. The problem is that girls are sure that help = weakness. In fact, this is a great way to remove the burden of responsibility from your shoulders and finally start enjoying life.
Start small: ask your man to carry the bags, give you a hand. And if there is no man, ask a stranger. Adult uncles are also pleased to help a beautiful girl. Believe me, we really miss your emotions when we open the door for you and this wonderful feeling that you are strong, hairy and powerful.
Sex
A woman who is carefully and regularly “loved” is much less susceptible to all the nonsense, mood swings, bouts of elitism and other things that make her a TP.
Most often, an attempt to sell her body at a higher price leads to the fact that the lady sits for a long time without sex. And it infuriates her. She may not want sexual satisfaction so much as the attention that this kind of intimacy brings. For many young ladies, sex is the highest stage of narcissism; they enjoy not so much the process as the fact that they are wanted. A satisfied girl is minus half of all problems with the head.
What does it mean to educate
Family life is not a strict drill and the designation of rigid boundaries, but, first of all, building contact that fully takes into account the interests of a man, where there is no risk of becoming henpecked. At the same time, you need to take into account that a woman is initially smart, patient and cunning.
She can hide for a while, pretend that she has submitted, and at the right moment deliver an insidious blow. If a girl grew up in a complete family with traditional foundations, then, most likely, she absorbed respect for a man with her mother’s milk, and adjustments in behavior will not be required.
Honest conversation3
There is no easier way to understand each other than a heart-to-heart conversation. Just explain to your loved one that you are not satisfied with her character. Or rather, what exactly is wrong with the character. But we can’t begin to list the list of her actions and mistakes. Try to explain that because of her temper, you constantly fight, and this has a very bad effect on the relationship.
If a girl loves you, then she will definitely listen and try to do everything to become at least a little softer and more obedient.
