How to learn to ENJOY LIFE

Ivan Vdovin

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Come on, everyone has situations when life is not happy, and you live with some pain, everything around is gray, you don’t want anything. Just such apathy and depression that completely absorb you and this bottomless pit is so deep that you don’t even know how to get out of it. And complete anxiety, and vanity, you think that everything is lost and nothing will come of it, and how to live on? In this article we will talk about how to start enjoying life without anxiety and fuss. Read to the end and write comments.

Why don't people enjoy life? First reason

Joy in life is a set of states that bring satisfaction in the present life. That is, if a person is not happy with his life, it means he is not happy with himself or with another state of affairs. But the trouble is that the person most likely does not solve the problem, but thinks that everything will resolve itself.

But, unfortunately, this behavior is typical of people who have not matured psychologically, in other words, children. Even if a person is 40 years old, he may be a child at heart and not take responsibility for his life and what happens in it.

Read more: Midlife crisis in men

Hence we get this thing: there is no joy in life because of problems, the solution of which a person shifts to others or to the circumstances of life. But each person must solve his problems himself and only himself, otherwise there is a high chance of slipping into complete negativity and to alcohol.

What is joy?

Joy is an internal emotion of pleasure and cheerful mood.

A person can enjoy many things in his life. From the joy of knowledge, the joy of communication, the joy of movement and, in the end, simply the joy of life, which many characterize as causeless joy.

Joy is different from satisfaction. Joy, as a “higher” emotion, relates more to the soul, but the “body” is associated more with satisfaction, as its reaction to something.

I’m now happy that I’m writing a new article on my blog about self-development. What are you happy about?

Take a piece of paper and write 10 things that make you happy most in life.

For me personally, enjoying life is a skill that I try to improve every day.

Let your interest be joy. Everything else is unimportant.
— Osho

Unfortunately, not all people know how to enjoy life. There is a lot of negativity in our society.

If every person paid more attention to their thoughts and emotions, then society would be more rosy, harmonious and prosperous.

Well, to create such a society, you need to start with yourself.

And if you are reading this article, then you already have an interest in this topic and a desire to be more joyful.

The emotion of joy is an ideal emotion to interact with people at work or while spending any leisure time, to inspire confidence in your interlocutors and is constantly in the spotlight.

The emotion of joy is the best emotion to be creative. Most masterpieces of art (art, music, culinary and many others) are created based on this emotion.

The emotion of joy is a high emotion to think about human existence, the meaning of life, one’s purpose , and other philosophical topics, which are so important for every person to talk about!

Why don't people enjoy life? The second reason

The second reason why people do not enjoy life is that spiritually they carry a burden of negative emotions that they cannot let go of and love to suffer. Here it is either self-pity or transferring the burden of suffering from one’s parents. That is, the child saw how mom or dad suffered, but he really wanted to help, so he took on part of the burden. In this situation, Hellinger arrangements help well.

And if we take self-pity, then such a person evokes negative emotions in himself in order to show those around him what a sufferer he is and how bad everything is for him, so that they would feel sorry for him. In this case, psychotherapy is needed to quickly find the root of the problem and eliminate it. There is a free consultation for this.

Treatment of depression

If your mood is very low, it is important not to postpone your visit to a specialist, but to seek help in a timely manner. At the first meeting, the specialist will conduct a psychological diagnosis, after which he will determine the necessary methods of psychological assistance.

It is very difficult, and sometimes impossible, to get rid of depression on your own, since special psychological defense mechanisms operate in the human psyche that do not allow a sober assessment of the situation, understanding the causes of the problem, or looking at the circumstances objectively. Our psyche is created in such a way that it distorts the perception of reality in a certain way, based on our upbringing, experience, habits and stereotypes.

It is important to know that traditionally in medical institutions all types of depression are treated with psychotropic drugs. In the case where depression is caused by psycho-emotional reasons (and this is the overwhelming number of requests), this approach has proven itself to be ineffective, because the very reason for the development of the disorder is not eliminated, but only the external manifestations of depression are artificially muffled

As a result, some time after the end of treatment, depression returns again. In addition, the use of psychotropic drugs entails side effects. Therefore, in addition to taking medications (antidepressants), qualified psychotherapy is very important.

Why don't people enjoy life? Third reason

Reluctance to live is the third reason. Even if a person lives an ordinary life, he can still have a program for destroying himself and not wanting to live. And if a person doesn’t want to live, then why be happy? After all, it is logical that if a person enjoys life, it means that he wants to live and live his life happily, despite any problems that fate brings us. Well, what can you do, such is life.

Therefore, we need to watch more subconscious programs and change them, change them to positive ones, so that the colors of life sparkle in a new way. \

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Motivation to action

Why you have no luck in life - who is to blame for failures and how to deal with them

Motivating yourself to make changes in life is quite difficult. Each person has their own reasons for this condition. There is no easy way to get rid of the problem. To force yourself to change something, you go through certain stages:

Admitting there is a problem. If joy in life does not appear within several weeks or months, then this indicates a problem.
Search for the cause of this condition. To fix a problem, you need to find its beginning.
Give up the fear of change. There is an expression: “Everything that is done is for the better.” It may be difficult at first after the change, but later it can serve as a new discovery and bring a lot of positive things.
Find a new interesting activity, create a hobby.
Create new goals for life and smoothly move towards achieving them.
Stop looking back at the past.

Important! The most effective motivation is a new goal.

How to learn to enjoy life?

To start enjoying life, you need to go into life looking forward, and not carry all the negativity that happened to you in the past. It sounds simple, of course, but it’s not simple at all. I myself was looking for answers in life to become happy and enjoy life. And personally, I had to work hard in this regard. But here I will share the usual methods that will help you.

Meditations

To clear your mind of the past and get rid of the oppression that drags you back to negativity, you need to teach your body to react neutrally to various situations of the past. Simply put, all our emotions are in the body, accordingly, our body once learned to experience a given emotion, so we need to return to the past experience and neutralize the situation, or rather relive it. That's all. But this is not done in 1-5 times. And for 50 and above. But no one said it was easy to do.

Read more: What is meditation and how to meditate correctly

Take up dancing

I have never seen dancers not enjoying life. If a person dances, it means that he a priori likes to live. This is how it is built into our psyche. Remember yourself, when everything is fine with you and life has presented you with a good surprise, you really want to dance, or, well, make a little face. It's the same here. You dance and everything gets better.

It will also be a plus to dance and remember negative situations from the past, so you will neutralize them and everything will get better gradually. But dancing is the coolest thing in life.

Have some good coffee

This method is suitable for those who want to start enjoying life here and now, and is not suitable for those who constantly drink coffee. The fact is that coffee produces a hormone of happiness and therefore, if necessary, induce a good mood now. But this method will stop working and even cause depression if you constantly abuse coffee. But here everything is individual. Article about coffee.

Putting on a smile

Yes, no matter how banal it may sound, but a smile on your face helps a lot in setting yourself up for a good life. What's the secret? The fact is that everyone associates a smile on their face with joy. Our body will remember that if we smile, then everything must be fine. Worth a try.

But this method does not always work right away; you need to put on a smile in the morning and walk around with it all day, even if you feel bad and sad. You will forget about it, but be sure to return to the tight smile. At first it will seem tense, and then it will become more natural.

Memories before bed

Before you go to bed, remember 10 joyful events that happened to you during the day? You may think that nothing good has happened to you, but try to screw it up and pull out something good to the point of absurdity. For example, the cashier at the store smiled at you, the weather was good, and so on.

This way our brain will be reformatted from a negative perception to a positive one. This does not happen very quickly, but gradually your brain will restructure itself in a positive way.

Captured by stereotypes: why are we sad on holidays?

Many of us notice how sad it becomes on the eve of the New Year or Birthday. The pre-holiday blues have a number of reasons:

Awareness of the transience of time;
Round date threshold;
Disappointment in one's own achievements by this period of life;
Longing for the “good old” days when the trees were taller and the grass was greener;
A past in which holidays were accompanied by scandals;
The absence of a person nearby with whom pleasant emotions are associated;
Fears for the future.

Why do we fall into pre-holiday depression? This is a consequence of an incorrect psychological program downloaded into us many years ago.

As children, we were taught the attitude “we should be happy on holidays.” At first, it did not contradict reality. Magic, goodies, surprises, gifts, cheerful children's laughter and the comfort of home. However, with age, our faith in miracles declines significantly, and the conditions for creating an atmosphere of joy no longer guarantee the notorious “happy ending.” And life situations never adapt to a calendar date that is convenient for you. The holiday can be ruined by a quarrel, separation, loneliness or illness. And you are amazed: so many plans, and here there is such disappointment. Against the backdrop of unjustified expectations, the bitterness of realizing that everything turned out exactly like this intensifies significantly. Adding fuel to the fire is general merriment, holiday TV shows, couples in love carrying valentines and others whose lives turned out much more successfully on this day.

Internal negativity is a pit where positivity drains.

Look, what a thing, you yourself feed positive or negative energy with your energy. But you unconsciously choose the negative. Why?

The fact is that how you were raised or what your childhood was like depends on whether you will be positive or negative.

The bad news is that if you don’t deal with your internal negativity, it can lead to stress and illness.

The worst thing is to live your whole life in negativity and regret your wasted life.

The only thing that will help cope with negativity is Gestalt therapy.

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