View in gender relations
Gaze is of great importance in intersexual communication. Many women claim that they fall in love with a man after the first eye contact. If a man can withstand a woman’s persistent gaze, expressing his determination in it, in further communication she will unconsciously show more respect for him.
A woman’s look at a man is the primary test of his masculine qualities.
To quickly look away in such a situation and become embarrassed means admitting defeat. However, a woman must also be confident enough in her abilities to decide on such a test.
If the person you like averts your eyes, continue looking at him. If after this he looks at you again, this is a sure sign of sympathy. If at the same time a smile appears on his face, you can start the conversation without a doubt.
Which look is considered accidental and which is considered a conscious challenge? The normal time of eye contact, after which both people naturally avert their eyes, does not exceed 2–3 seconds. If a person looks at you longer, he probably has an interest in you.
How to influence your interlocutor with your gaze
From the above, the conclusion follows: you can develop for yourself a certain scheme of psychological influence on your interlocutor using your gaze.
- Determine the goal you want to achieve during the conversation.
- Set yourself in a certain mood to evoke the state that will be projected in your gaze.
- Look your interlocutor closely in the eyes.
- As a result, you will see his response.
Your counterpart’s subconscious will work instantly and he will only have to choose options for action on your emotional message.
Read more: 10 ways to manage people and get your way
Predator's look
Let's take the gaze of a predator as an example.
To develop it, you first need to imagine your favorite treat and yourself in a hungry state. Next, you mentally begin to eat this dish. Now make an association between food and your interlocutor and gradually begin to “absorb” him with your gaze, like your favorite food.
This scheme can work in different situations. In this case, in order to give the look the desired meaning, it is important to initially determine your role in the conversation and the place of your counterpart in it, and only then adjust your internal state to the desired “wave”.
"Basic" view
Before you start studying different types of views, you should know two main points of work in this direction:
- Acceleration of the psyche
- "Basic" view
Do you remember what the eyes of a sleepy person are like? That's right. They are indifferent. The gazes of non-overclocked people convey much less information than those of overclocked people. But it’s worth dwelling on the “basic” view in more detail. It got its name because it is the basis from which all kinds of branches come.
The basic look always expresses strength. He is attentive, focused and calm. It will be very difficult for your interlocutor to bear it. It is best to combine this look with a smile created with the help of lips. Then you have every chance to suppress the will of your interlocutor.
When conducting leadership courses for managers of large enterprises, senior management of companies, psychiatrists and psychologists, they must study the method of influencing a person using the basic view.
View in the struggle for leadership
Gaze is the most powerful non-verbal method of influence. It can subjugate a person and determine the nature of your further communication. However, can it be called a tool - something that we can consciously use for our own purposes? Can a person’s will break the instinctive desire to avert his eyes under a persistent and unbending gaze?
In nature, the strongest male will also have the most persistent gaze. You can often see how a large animal, having met the gaze of a smaller representative of its own species, turns away, as if yielding and submitting to it. Body size, muscle mass, jaw size and other traits certainly influence the non-bloody determination of a dominant male. However, this is not enough.
A look is a sure sign of real strength, vital energy, the ability to fight to the end, the readiness to die in battle.
Man is a social being, so he is influenced not only by natural factors. This includes morality, ethics, and social status. Thus, a long gaze in culture may simply be regarded as incorrect behavior, and that is why a shy desire to look away will arise in us. However, the main factor influencing the persistence of the gaze is will. This is what can make your gaze your greatest psychological weapon.
A man's languid gaze
9. A gentle look from a man
This is the look of a man who is in love with you. You will know that a man loves you when he stares at you with a dreamy smile, as if he is under the influence of some substance.
This is the look he might give you after his first kiss or after he makes love to you for the first time. Unfortunately, this view is short-lived. As a rule, it disappears after you get used to each other enough, although in rare cases it may return during your joint anniversaries.
10. Crazy look
This is the hopeless look of a man who is simply crazy about you. He can be pushy, as a man will do anything to keep you around, which makes him seem desperate. But be careful, this often signals obsession and dramatic relationships.
The importance of eye contact
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How else does our perspective influence communication? The following facts are known in psychology:
- People who make eye contact during conversations are perceived as more honest and open.
- Lack of eye contact in a dialogue is interpreted by us as a lack of interest.
- When speaking in public, a good speaker always looks around the audience to make eye contact with everyone. This makes his speech seem more convincing.
- Eye contact when meeting someone is extremely important. An open and good-natured look forms 30% of a person’s primary attitude.
- Quickly looking away during an acquaintance is read as instability of character and readiness to submit.
One thing follows from these facts: the strong-willed ability to hold gaze at the eyes of another person makes the image of the beholder stronger, more powerful and influential.
However, these rules cannot be called universal. Much depends both on the nature of the gaze and on the person. Someone will consider a long look as a sign of impoliteness, someone will start to get angry, someone will get scared.
It is necessary to maintain a balance of modesty and perseverance in the gaze, corresponding to the specific situation of communication with a person.
The main thing is not to provoke a defensive or negative reaction. You can subjugate a person to your will with your gaze by inspiring respect and demonstrating strong character, not aggression. The gaze should be calm, intent, without a shadow of pretense or shamelessness.
Discontent
Don't make mistakes - don't waste your time on bad people. For example, a girl came with a new boyfriend to a cafe, and then from his side he began: “The menu is poorly designed,” “The coffee is too hot,” “The snacks are tasteless,” “The chairs are uncomfortable,” etc.
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Most likely, a bad mood is his lifestyle, part of his character. Is it necessary to spend time on such a person and correcting him? Plus, toxic people usually demand a lot of attention to themselves. They may well present a huge list of demands to their partner and believe that everyone owes them.
Professional tool
Developing a hypnotic gaze is very important for doctors who help patients cure a mental disorder. Anyone can master this technique, but you also need to know what to do next with the patient. The method of constructing a correct suggestion must be carefully and deeply studied.
The easiest way to master the magical gaze technique is for a person with charisma and attractiveness. They will automatically attract attention to themselves. But only by winning over the client, it is impossible to work effectively with him. To do this, the therapist must have knowledge, skills and abilities. Therefore, first training, then practice. And don’t forget about the need to undergo therapy yourself.
Excessive care
The girl has barely met her new acquaintance, and he is already bombarding her with questions like: “Aren’t you cold?”, “Will these shoes be comfortable to walk in?”, “Do you like this restaurant?” etc. There can be almost a million questions.
It's one of two things. Either this guy suffers from low self-esteem and therefore strives to please others, or he is so afraid of making a mistake in front of the girl he likes that he would prefer to clarify everything in advance.
It is important that such an over-caring guy gets an understanding girl who has nothing against such hyper-protectiveness.
However, sometimes this behavior is irritable and intrusive. But this must be said delicately, without harshness. There are not very many caring and sensitive people in our world anyway. There is no need to hurt them.
Education
Now let's talk about how to develop a hypnotic gaze. In fact, this is just an auxiliary technique. It seems quite difficult at first, but the more you practice, the easier it is to use hypnosis in real life. Hypnotic gaze training can also be useful for people who are not directly involved in psychotherapeutic work. It is this that forms the basis of neurolinguistic programming.
Of course, this skill can also be used for selfish purposes, since it gives some power over people. Therefore, the question also arises about the ethical side of training. That is, the person who needs it to provide assistance must master the technique. On the other hand, it will require a personal investment from a person.
Nothing will come of it without training
Moreover, this will take quite a lot of time. It is necessary not only to choose the right ones, but also to repeat the exercises many times. The hypnotic gaze is not difficult at all. You just need to repeat simple exercises day after day. At the initial stages, you need to choose only the simplest ones. They are not so much effective as they are useful.
The first step is to master general gaze training and calmness in presence. After this, you need to learn how to transmit:
- Sparkle in the eyes.
- Emotional message.
It sounds simple, but in fact you will have to work hard to master them to the required extent. The required skill develops gradually. The hypnotist goes deeper into training and changes not only his view of familiar things, but also his manner of behavior. That is, his mind and physiology are gradually rebuilt.
What does “piercing gaze” mean?
Throughout human history, special attention has always been paid to the eyes, vision and everything connected with them. All world religions have the idea that higher powers are always watching every person throughout his life.
The sun was often called the "Eye of God." All great people - rulers, scientists and cultural figures - have a piercing gaze in their images, be it a statue or a portrait. But the artists gave them different facial expressions: forward striving, wise awareness, anger or immeasurable kindness, depending on their character and type of activity. This means that a piercing gaze carries powerful energy for different purposes - it can attract, repel, cause fear or delight.
