The character of a teenager and his psychological changes

4.3.1. Teenager and the Internet

We, adult Internet users, need the Internet primarily for work, but besides this, we use the Internet in accordance with our interests, tastes and preferences.
We know that if we want we can find almost everything there. What do our children prefer to do and what do they look for online? Network accessibility, high user competence, combined with the risks of the Internet environment and lack of sufficient life experience, turn teenagers into a risk group when using the Global Network. Diagram 1. Amount of time spent by schoolchildren on the Internet

According to our survey of high school students, 25% of the students surveyed indicated that they spend about an hour a day on the Internet, about 50% responded that they spend four or more hours on the Internet and social networks. Every day, 50% of students use the Internet freely without restrictions from parents. And only 25% indicated that they had a time limit. As can be seen from the diagram, more than half of the target audience spends significant time on the Internet.

As you know, any activity is aimed at satisfying needs. The range of basic needs of a modern teenager is quite wide. In addition to the vital ones (physiological and safety), an important place among them is occupied by social needs (communication, love, recognition) and needs associated with personal development (cognition, understanding, self-realization).

Using the wide possibilities of the Internet, teenagers can satisfy most of their needs. Moreover, with the help of the network this can sometimes be done much faster than in real life. In addition, on the Internet, a teenager can act independently of his parents or anyone else. Here, one of the leading social needs of this age—independence and autonomy—is fully realized.

What needs do teenagers satisfy using the Internet? Psychologists have identified 7 types of adolescent Internet users:

Curious For curious children, the Internet is a means of finding information.

The Internet - in their words, is: “a help desk”, “an information pit”, “unlimited possibilities for searching for information”, “a free personal space where you can find a lot of information”, “a very convenient and exciting tool for searching for information”, “this a large archive containing information about things that are necessary and interesting to you.”

The Internet, as an inexhaustible treasury of information in modern society, is the main tool for satisfying the cognitive activity of adolescents. Curious people are characterized by diverse interests. They find out news online, search for information on various topics that interest them, watch movies and videos, and listen to music. The search capabilities of the network help broaden one's horizons and introduce the curious to all the diversity of the world. For teenagers in this category, the main thing is not to know, but to be able to find the necessary information. Thus, cognitive activity turns into search activity: instead of the desire to “think” and “teach,” such a teenager prefers to “search.” In addition, it is this category of teenage users who suffer the most from information overload, which leads to serious stress.

Curiosity and search activity overwhelm the sense of caution, and the ability to critically evaluate the reliability of information decreases. It is the inquisitive wanderers on the Internet who most underestimate the threats and dangers of the Internet. Therefore, the curious are more likely than others to encounter unwanted information and are the most likely recipients of all kinds of viruses and spam.

Rebels

The Internet for rebels is: “a place where you can do whatever you want”, “a free and free space”, “the Internet is simply freedom!!!”

The activities of rebels are largely aimed at satisfying the need for autonomy and independence. In the process of socialization, this need presupposes, first of all, the desire for independence from parents. As a rule, children and teenagers are left alone with a monitor, on the other side of which is an alluring virtual world. The majority of parents (70%) do not interfere with this process and do not limit their children’s use of the Internet. Together with the Internet, we are raising individualism and freedom in our children. And rebels are the first to learn these lessons.

Rebels openly admit that they very often visit sites prohibited by their parents. In these alluring and uncharted territories of the network, not only unexpected discoveries and interesting news can await them, but also unnecessary information that burdens a teenager, and sometimes simply harmful information. Rebels are not shy to admit that they often use the Internet for unseemly purposes: for example, downloading pornography, getting into conflicts with other users, hacking closed sites.

Such activities allow the teenager to feel his independence, to feel like he is leading in the interaction. At the same time, they have the illusion of permissiveness and impunity.

Rebels are more likely than other types of Internet users to present their personal information online, and are also more likely to meet online strangers in real life, putting themselves at risk. They also run the risk of not understanding that there is no difference between online and offline crime.

Party People

For partygoers, the Internet is a place to find friends and a means of communication. The Internet - in their words, is “a place where you can chat with friends”, “a means of communication, ... free communication”, “a global network where they look for friends”, “the opportunity to communicate with people from different parts of the planet”.

Partygoers use the Internet to satisfy social needs for communication, belonging to an interest group, love and recognition. For this purpose, they write blogs, communicate with friends on ICQ, via Skype, on social networks, in chat rooms and forums. With the help of all this, they build relationships, discuss plans and meetings, gain recognition and self-realization. Through forums and chats, teenagers have the opportunity to express their opinions on painful issues or simply take part in the discussion of any issue. The main purpose for which partygoers come online is to find friends and maintain contacts with them. Therefore, their main location on the Internet is social networks, where they create their own communities of interests and have the opportunity to communicate with a certain circle of people. Teenagers who have communication difficulties find it much easier to find friends and like-minded people online. On social networks, partygoers often not only lead an active lifestyle - they produce content: they create their own pages or profiles, upload a variety of information, try to express themselves through various multimedia functions: avatars, walls, graffiti, photos, videos. The majority of partygoers (80%) blog on one or another social service. There are many more girls among bloggers, especially from high school.

In addition, adolescents included in this group are more likely than others, due to the high intensity of communication, to face various threats, especially extortion, aggression and sexual harassment. They are at risk of casual dating and are more likely to share their personal information, thus becoming potential victims of various types of scammers and criminals.

Consumers

The modern network is one of the schools for training future citizens of a consumer society. For consumers, the Internet is a big store. They describe the Internet as: “a place where you can find what you need,” “where you can download a lot,” “a means of exchanging information and files,” “a big hole where you can find everything - from a picture to a diagram of a nuclear bomb.”

Typically, teenagers of this type download pictures, music, videos, and films via the Internet. They also use the services of online stores.

The Internet satisfies their need for possession, and therefore for recognition, knowledge and belonging. For a teenager, it is important to have information and a variety of iconic things and products that unite him with his peers: listen to the same music, watch the same video, have certain things, use some program, know what and where you can find it. Teenage consumers learn to navigate a large flow of information and a wide range of choices. They get used to comparing and choosing. Online consumers are more informed and sophisticated, more rational and down-to-earth in setting their goals. One of the main problems that consumers may face is fraud. Such users get used to the fact that many things (programs, books, music, films) can be obtained for free. In search of more favorable conditions for purchasing something, they may take the bait of criminals: download a free file and get a virus, or pay much more than was agreed upon, and get something completely different from what they expected. But consumers, more often than other types, are most fully aware of all kinds of network threats, which means they have a higher level of psychological security compared to others.

Botanists

For nerds, the Internet is primarily a source of educational information. The Internet is: “it is a source of knowledge”, “a good source of knowledge”, “a learning center”, “a source of information for school”.

As a rule, nerds are children who study well and are less likely to share the rebellious interests of their peers. Teenagers themselves say that nerds are a “way of life”; they are boring, boring and outdated, too correct and obedient. But they can be interesting conversationalists and very useful on tests or when you haven’t completed your homework.

Botanists satisfy their cognitive needs on the Internet; with its help they write essays and reports, study lessons, and prepare for exams. Using the Internet for study, teenagers not only satisfy their need for new knowledge and expand their horizons - the information they find helps them achieve peer recognition and self-realization.

Children from this group are less likely than other types to encounter dangers online, and are much less likely to give personal information to online acquaintances and meet them in real life. The main risk for them is a possible uncritical attitude towards the information they find on the Internet. Often, while searching for study material, they may encounter unverified, unreliable, or objectionable content.

Business

This smallest group includes teenagers for whom the Internet is a means of finding work or some activity and a place where it can be found. The Internet for them is: “a place of work”, “earning money”, “a place where you can find everything for work”. Business people look for work on the Internet, write programs and games, create and edit websites, and are interested in business news.

These teenagers are already beginning to look for different paths for their development and career. While their peers are just beginning to decide on their future profession, they are trying to create something of their own, to realize themselves in some activity. Users of this type take the Internet more seriously than their peers; they see, in addition to entertainment, its wide variety of possibilities.

At the same time, there is a threat of some imbalance of values ​​and goals: why study if you can earn a living without a school certificate. In addition, when trying to find a job via the Internet, you can come across scammers. Sometimes young businessmen may not take into account some important factors, such as legal ones.

Players

For this category of users, the Internet is, first of all, a means of playing or, as teenagers themselves say, “a place where you can play.” They are described in detail in section 3.3.2.

According to our survey, “curious” and “party people” predominate among high school students in Bishkek and the Chui region.

Diagram 2. Content of sites visited by schoolchildren

In first place in terms of attendance, high school students indicated entertainment sites for watching movies and listening to music - 83%, and educational sites in second place - 42%. And only 34% of the total number of respondents indicated that they visit news sites.

Analyzing all types of users to assess the degree of danger of the Internet environment, a pattern was obtained: the more intensively teenagers use the Internet, the less sensitive they are to threats emanating from the Internet. On the one hand, the more familiar, understandable and accessible the Internet is, the less significant are the factors of novelty and uncertainty that determine the feeling of fear and danger. The teenager is confident that he can always choose for himself what, where and how to do, with whom to communicate, what to look for and what to do, and when he doesn’t like something, he can simply change his activity or turn off the computer. As a result, there is a feeling of complete control and mastery of the situation, which satisfies the need for security - one of the basic human needs in the system. At the same time, things change much faster online than in real life. Full control and mastery of the situation online is just an illusion. Self-confidence, carelessness and carelessness of teenagers increase the risk of them getting into unpleasant situations. Therefore, all types of student users are in the same risk group. Especially those of them who travel on the World Wide Web more often than others.[13]

So, building a highly efficient information society in the Kyrgyz Republic is impossible without creating a safe and ethical Internet environment, first of all, for such a massive contingent of Internet users as children and adolescents. To do this, it is necessary to conduct a comprehensive analysis of the situation in the “children – Internet” system from the point of view of existing and potentially possible risks and dangers of the global network for younger generations.

Causes

Among the main reasons for the crisis in adolescents, changes in relationships with loved ones and people around them are noted. These changes occur through the development of self-knowledge.

The aggravation of the teenage crisis is intensified by external factors :

• overprotection;
• parental control;
• dependence traced in relationships between family members.

Internal factors that aggravate the crisis include the psychological state characteristic of an individual teenager. He has already formed a certain set of habits and character traits that hinder new needs and aspirations.

4.3.2. Computer and online games

The game accompanies the development of a person from early childhood to the heights of his self-realization. The need for play is directly related to the needs for recognition and cognition. The desire to play does not go away with childhood. The game is in demand at any age. And on the Internet you can play anything. The range of games is very wide. Electronic games over the past 10-12 years have evolved from primitive, both technologically and psychologically, to high-quality products, with multi-million dollar budgets, realistic graphics, sound and video. Currently, in addition, a huge number of various peripheral devices have appeared (steering wheels, pedals, vibration chairs, helmets and virtual reality suits) that provide feedback to the player from the world created in the game. The Internet is used to communicate between players all over the planet.

There are also games and applications on the Internet that have become widespread, where there seems to be nothing special: no mutants, no blood, no violence, but it is addictive almost like a drug. For example, the computer game “My Favorite Farm”. Children, running home, literally rush to the computer to water the garden or take care of the animals, often forgetting about lunch, homework, or helping around the house. Such games are attractive due to their mass appeal; at the same time, there can be several hundred participants in the game, both familiar and unfamiliar. The greatest damage to studies, careers, friendships and family relationships is caused by an increase in time spent online, and, as a result, relegating real life to the background.

We can safely say that a modern computer game is capable of creating an interactive imaginary world with its own laws, norms and values. Moreover, the more “attractive” the created world is for the player, the greater the impact this product has on the player’s socialization process.

The most popular now are massively multiplayer online role-playing games, in which a large number of players can play in real time. Particular attention is paid to the development of the hero, the growth of his skills and abilities. The action in such games takes place in fantasy worlds with the participation of a large number of interesting characters; storylines can develop in different directions depending on the actions of the player. These games can combine elements of different genres, which attracts even more players. And teenagers are among the first to start playing them.

It is traditionally believed that a computer game captivates a person when he needs to realize his immediate needs and throw out his emotions. But in reality, everything is much more complicated. Many gamers agree with the statement that it is quite possible to live in the virtual world of a computer game - in the psychological sense. This is especially true for large-scale Internet worlds that simulate social relations. But what is so special about computer games and the self-realization they provide? A distinctive feature of a computer game (in comparison with a regular game) is the significantly greater power of virtualization of the “I”, which is provided by technical means. The playing space in a regular role-playing game is defined by rules, and the players are forced to keep these rules in mind so as not to break them, otherwise the game will lose its meaning, so a person is forced to constantly remind himself that he is in the game. And someone who plays a computer game does not need to consciously delineate the playing space and keep the rules of the game in mind - in a computer game it is simply impossible to break the rules, since the boundaries of what is permissible are strictly delineated by the game program. As a result, a person is immersed much deeper into the game world.

Positive Opportunities

• Online games require perseverance, attention and dexterity, and contribute to the development of spatial and strategic thinking;
• The opportunity and necessity to communicate with other players in multiplayer online games develops communication skills and satisfies the need for communication.
• Games help you achieve peer recognition: it matters what you play, what you play on, and what level your character has reached. Gamers also use their characters for self-realization: after all, online games allow you not only to choose who to play for, but also to give a name, change some settings, change status, improve in equipment, weapons and increase various indicators (level, achievements, popularity ), you can even influence the plot.
• Game lovers follow technical innovations and are well versed in computers and the Internet. They form a certain circle of communication - with other players, game partners, and participants in special forums.
• A computer game can help to more gently experience age-related crises associated with a discrepancy between development potential and the means of its implementation. It is common for teenagers to set high life goals for themselves, but a lack of life experience creates mental stress that prevents them from realizing them. In play, the child finds a way to reduce this tension, and as a result, his life and activities improve in some way.

Risks of the game

• In role-playing computer games, the player gradually takes on the role of his game character, which can lead to an identity problem: while living the life of their hero, players can become so involved in virtual life that they forget about the real one. Escaping reality and accepting a role are considered the main reasons for attachment to the game. This can cause addiction or result in psychological disorders.
• Players spend many hours a day in front of a computer screen. This affects their health and mental state: insomnia, irritability, inattention, and increased fatigue appear.
• By communicating on behalf of their character with others, players become less able to recognize real human emotions.
• Passion for online games can also cause material damage: many of them require financial investments, which can ultimately result in a large sum.
• A person who becomes interested in computer games falls under the influence of the effect of illusory self-realization: without realizing it or even denying it, he begins to “live” in virtual worlds, realizing his leading motives and life goals there. The trap is that a person is quite satisfied with his achievements and often does not realize that he is not actually self-actualizing.

By the way, research shows that children with high school performance and normal development are more interested in computer games. Children with adaptation difficulties, on the contrary, are less likely to get involved in computer games. Passion for games leads to difficulties in self-realization only when gaming self-realization replaces self-realization in productive activities (work, education, sports). At the same time, the effect of self-realization in the game can be useful for correcting certain types of difficulties in self-realization in real life. Sometimes a teenager needs to feel the taste of success, albeit virtual, to increase his satisfaction with life, albeit temporarily, in order to believe in himself and start living in reality.

Manifestations of psychological neoplasms in adolescents aged 14–16 years

In order to overcome this most difficult period of life less painfully for a family, it is necessary to understand the psychological new formations that arise in middle adolescence.

Depending on the development (maturation) of the child’s personality, neoplasms in adolescents can appear from the age of 13 and last until the age of 15.

There are several such neoplasms.

Problems communicating with peers increase sharply among teenagers

Switching your constant communication from teachers and parents to friends - classmates and peers, a little older, but who are an authority for a particular teenager. At this time, he develops skills in social interaction, that is, he learns to obey the opinions of others, but at the same time defending his rights. The consequence of this is the manifestation of two contradictions - belonging to a peer group and the desire for isolation, that is, having your own individual personal space.

4.3.3.Teenager and media

Modern media carry extremely diverse, multifaceted information without taking into account the characteristics of the audience.

Diagram 3. Sources of information for schoolchildren

Our survey showed that students use the Internet as the main source of information about events in the world. 80% of respondents indicated that they receive information about world events through the Internet, 8% from radio and 54% through television.

The survey found that high school students get their news from a variety of news sites. All the major news sites have the same amount of traffic from high school students.

In educational terms, researchers identify the following functions of the media as significant:

• Recreational (defines leisure time, both group and individual);
• Relaxation - relieves the feeling of loneliness, serves as a means of distraction in case of complications in communication.
• Information and educational - Print, television, radio, cinema are focused on the need of people to obtain a variety of facts and data about interesting phenomena and social events.
• Normative - With the help of the media, norms and patterns of behavior in society are promoted, a system of values ​​is approved, in this regard, the media act as an important social regulator of people's life.
• Integrative - The media unite the masses around ideas, contribute to the formation of common views, positions, assessments of certain events among people and create a psychological tone in society.
• Entertainment-compensatory - Relaxing in front of a TV screen, in a movie, with a magazine in your hands allows you to relax after a working or school day, change your emotional background and at the same time get a charge of vivid sensations and impressions that are missing in real life. This function of the media is especially significant for adolescence and young adulthood.
• Background - Radio, television, sound recordings allow many people to avoid loneliness.

The results of numerous studies allow us to conclude that the impact of information technology on humans has not been fully studied. In recent decades, the interest of many scientists has been drawn to the problem of the impact of television on teenagers, who spend a lot of time watching TV shows, movies and advertising. These television and video products are replete with various effective techniques for persuasion and imposition of a certain opinion - sound, music, bright images, the image of idols, actors, slogans, vocabulary of modern youth, fashionable life and others. Unlike an adult, a teenager cannot always classify incoming information into “good” and “bad.” Scenes of violence that abound on many television channels gradually lead to the fact that human life in the eyes of a mentally fragile teenager is devalued.

The psyche of a teenager during this period is very unstable, so he cannot always objectively assess the situation offered by these programs. A young man copies the actions of on-screen characters, transfers them into his life, thereby forming and developing interests, ideals, relationships with others, attitude towards the world and its values, based on the actions of the characters on the screen.

Stages of growing up

1. A child, growing up, goes through three temporary stages.
2. The first stage is childhood. It lasts approximately until the age of 11.
3. The second stage is early adolescence. Its time period is from 11 to 14 years.
4. And finally, the third stage of human maturation is senior adolescence, located in the range from 15 to 18 years.
5. Between the second and third stages of growing up there is an intermediate stage, not distinguished by psychologists as a separate, middle stage - from 14 to 16.

Adolescent Psychology - Highlights

Speaking about this category of children, it should be noted that the division according to the stages of growing up is quite arbitrary.

During this time period of his life, a young man begins to gain a new awareness and motivation for his own behavior. Lead them meaningfully.

Psychologists often focus the attention of parents of children in adolescence on this conventional transitional fragment (from 14 to 16 years old) in connection with the changes occurring in them, both physiological and mental.

Because this period, called the stage of personal and professional self-determination, is the most difficult in life for a growing teenager - a boy or a girl.

The emotional sphere of adolescents and motivation

At this time, the child develops his own individual personal position on all issues and situations. It often does not agree with the views and opinions of adults, including parents, on the same situation, which leads to conflict, which may result in a loss of mutual understanding and contact relationships between them.

Schizoid

These are closed, uncommunicative (won't or can't) teenagers. Contradictory in behavior, interests and character (for example, cold but sentimental). Schizoids are noticeable from childhood. These are quiet children, “mother’s joy.” They do not misbehave, do not run around, and do not reach out to other children. They have weak intuition, which often creates for them the image of Kai with a frozen heart. Due to their excessive closeness and low emotionality, they seem unpredictable and difficult to other people. They are distinguished by their rich imagination and unconventional hobbies.

Dangers

The schizoid type develops against the background of emotional rejection. The type of complete social isolation is dangerous.

Critical situations

Informal communication and informal contacts, the role of an organizer, participation in collective games or activities, a change in the usual way of life.

Tendency to deviate

Single independent offenses, crimes, alcoholism.

Recommendations for parents

Find a hobby for a teenager; acknowledge his ideas, but do not intrude too much into his inner world.

Unstable

These are weak-willed individuals who are not responsible. Disobedient, often antisocial. Although outwardly they can be quite sociable, helpful and obedient.

They don’t want to study, they are drawn to carefree pastime. They often end up in bad stories. They are attracted to everything forbidden. They are indifferent to the family. This type is formed against the background of low parental control.

Critical situations

Long-term concentration of attention and will, independent decision-making, discipline, assignments, restrictions on pleasures.

Tendency to deviate

Sexual promiscuity, antisocial behavior.

Recommendations for parents

First, have patience, tact and persistence (in the good sense of the word). Systematic exercise in sports will have a positive impact. An important condition is the unity of actions of teachers and parents.

Sensitive

These are shy and fearful teenagers. Often unsure of themselves and feeling inferior. They are shy, reserved, afraid to take risks. Always attached to the family (even when it is not well). Younger guys are preferred over peers.

They have high moral standards and are demanding of themselves. They can follow their ideal for a long time. They are able to objectively evaluate themselves and have developed intuition. Fears are associated with what others think about the teenager.

Dangers

This type develops against the background of excessive demands and coldness of parents, overprotection. With unfavorable development, schizophrenia, depression, and phobias can form.

Critical situations

A sharp change in activity, a situation of choice, difficult assignments, unfair accusations, criticism, isolation from loved ones (inability to share feelings), situations requiring leadership and responsibility.

Tendency to deviate

Not inclined. Sometimes there is a tendency towards suicidal thoughts. Alcohol is disgusting.

Recommendations for parents

The work should be aimed at increasing the child’s self-esteem and confidence. The main method is private conversations.

It is useful to find the activity in which the child is strong and direct him there. Contribute to his self-affirmation in her. However, at the same time, it is important to help the child establish himself in other positions (where he is weak).

Excessive care and petty control, ridicule and constant prohibitions are unacceptable. The child must learn to be independent. This requires mistakes, and they won’t happen if the teenager doesn’t try.

Psychasthenic

These are timid, fearful, clumsy teenagers. They are characterized by physical weakness. The type is revealed most often when the child enters school and the parents are excessively demanding.

Teenagers are suspicious, characterized by self-examination and a desire for reasoning. Fears are closely related to the future. Rituals, symbols, and formalism come in defense. They become attached to one family member. They avoid peers. They are loyal, reliable, stable in mood.

Dangers

There is a risk of developing obsessive-compulsive disorder or schizophrenia.

Critical situations

Independent decision-making (choice), tasks without instructions, quick changes in activities, fear, long-term physical and mental stress.

Tendency to deviate

Not inclined.

Recommendations for parents

It is necessary to promote the child’s initiative, not to encourage a sense of responsibility. The conversation should begin by remembering and discussing his successes. If trust has been gained from the child, then you need to directly discuss all his fears with him. Find out together what this really threatens and whether it threatens. During the conversation, it is also necessary to encourage initiative (the teenager’s statements, his decision-making).

Epileptoid

They are often in a state of despondency, anger, and irritation. These are explosive people. They are thrifty with things, but cruel with people and animals. They are trying to gain power. They are not flexible and stubborn. They try to break away from the family and completely cut off all ties. For company they choose weak-willed peers or younger ones. They love to be feared. However, they themselves can grovel before authoritative people.

Critical situations

Anarchy, the need for creative solutions, infringement of interests, competition, criticism, oppression.

Tendency to deviate behavior

Possible sadomasochistic tendencies, homosexuality, craving for asphyxia, drinking alcohol “to the point of blackout”, craving for destruction.

Recommendations for parents

It is important to be unhurried, sensitive, tactful, but persistent. Such a child should be entrusted with leading groups or activities. It is important to find something that distracts him from negative thoughts.

Cycloid

It makes itself felt in adolescence, first in girls. Manifests:

• apathy,
• pessimistic attitude
• loss of appetite,
• low performance.

Failures can trigger suicidal thoughts. This cycle is being replaced by the complete opposite. One cycle lasts from a week to two.

Critical situations

Change of stereotypes, traditions, life guidelines; unexpected assignments; change of rules, regime, responsibilities; failures, mental overload.

Tendency to deviate behavior

Not inclined. In rare cases, homosexuality and alcoholism are noted.

Recommendations for parents

It is important to learn your child’s cycle and create a set of tasks for each cycle. Tasks should match the child’s mood and strengths and distract him from negative thoughts.

How to help get through a difficult period

Changes at the physiological level, along with psychological problems during the crisis of adolescence, are quite difficult for a growing child. Parents are required to make every effort, coupled with the delicacy of the situation. Each child is unique, and therefore the approach to him during adolescence should be unique.

You need to be patient and try to follow the tips presented:

• Unobtrusively enter the child's environment. The main task is to become a true friend to a teenager. The parent will have to counter the confidence of misunderstanding on the part of adults with a calm and friendly approach.

You can let the teenager understand your weaknesses and shortcomings, expose your complexes. By entering the child’s environment, the parent will be able to participate in life situations that the child will share and help resolve problems if necessary.

• Showing interest in the child’s hobbies and activities. Support and praise will not be superfluous for the emerging personality. It will also be useful to talk about the teenager’s thoughts and reasoning, his points of view on various issues. It wouldn’t hurt to ask for his opinion in resolving family issues.
• Providing freedom. Personal space is especially important for a teenager, ideally his own room. Freedom and the right to choose are fundamental principles in communication and relationships with a child of adolescence. It is necessary to restrain yourself from the desire to control the actions, things and feelings of a teenager.

Neglecting this advice can lead to troubles in communication. The best thing about communicating with an older child is finding compromises and unobtrusively directing his thoughts in the right direction.

• Critical comments are not allowed. If you cannot do without them, then it is much better to point out the criticality of the action than the insufficiently good qualities of the person himself. Teenagers react too strongly to negative comments addressed to them, so it is necessary to speak out softly, and sometimes accompanied by praise.
• Personal recognition. A teenager is a full-fledged person with personal interests and opinions. You should not try to impose your conclusions.
• Praise. It is especially important for a child at this age due to the formation of mental processes and awareness of one’s own personal value.

• Patient attitude towards emotional attacks on the part of the child. We must not forget that a violent reaction to the inappropriate behavior of a teenager on the part of a parent can undermine his authority and lead to a violation of trust in the relationship. It is necessary to conduct conversations in a calm environment and in a calm tone.

Adolescence is a difficult time for both the child and his parents. However, its features are temporary phenomena that largely depend on the correct perception of the child by the parents and people around him.

Parents have the power to help their child survive a period of crisis and help him form the necessary integrity of his personality and life attitudes that comply with generally accepted moral standards.

Article design: Natalie Podolskaya

Conformal

The main characteristic is the lack of an opinion. These people always go with the flow, adapting to their surroundings and conditions. It is easier for them to change themselves than the situation. At the same time, adaptation to new conditions is difficult. They do not look for evidence or refutation; they take everything for granted. The motto of this type is: “be like everyone else.”

Dangers

This type rarely develops into pathology. But, for example, when a loved one is lost, depression can develop, and when arrested, paranoia can develop.

Critical situations

Independent choice, a new activity without a model or assistant, non-acceptance by an authoritative group, situations of volitional decisions and actions, new acquaintances, requests to talk about yourself or express yourself.

Deviant behavior

Minor offenses, alcoholism (under the influence of the group).

Recommendations for parents

Set a goal for your teenager (preferably a social cause). Be passionate about this idea with him, so you can earn authority. Talk to your teenager about his plans, do not make fun of them (even strange and unrealistic goals in your opinion).

Labile

Noticeable since childhood. These are often sick children with unstable moods. In a peer group they try to take the role of “favorite”. They are susceptible to mood both when they are away from their family and when they are close to their peers. They know how to build deep and lasting relationships. When in a good mood, they are sociable and kind; when in a bad mood, they are irritable and pugnacious.

Dangers

With emotional neglect by parents, death or departure of a family member, the labile type may suffer from depression; prone to neuroses and hysterics.

Critical situations

Competition, criticism, failure, fear, punishment, belittlement.

Tendency to deviate

Not inclined.

Recommendations for parents

It is important to treat your teenager kindly and sympathetically in order to establish a trusting relationship. This is important for this type. After emotional unloading, he becomes ready for a productive conversation. It is always necessary to encourage the child and draw positive prospects for him.