Strong personalities are immediately noticeable due to obvious or subtle signs. Their energy, charisma and self-confidence attract, and their thoughts and lifestyle become the subject of imitation and admiration. How to become a strong personality and does everyone have the inclinations to overcome self-doubt, doubts and weak will? Let's consider this issue in more detail.
What gives strength?
I found a psalm that describes the qualities of a person pleasing to God. For me, this is the strength of a spiritual person. I want to take this topic apart piece by piece. And here is the hashtag on the topic #WhatStrength
This is Psalm 14
And the first thing in it is to be blameless.
“He who walks blamelessly” (Psalm 14:2)
I noticed that when I do not allow myself to fall below my own standard, even in small things, I am internally strong.
And sometimes anecdotes, jokes, discussing someone, or simply treating someone badly without even saying bad things to the person - you allow yourself to do this, although inside you understand that this is not your level. And then you need to mobilize your strength, but you are limp and spiritually sluggish.
To walk blamelessly means to develop such paths. It's not just being pure, but also living like that in the modern world. Living among wickedness, sin, hurtful words, hypocrisy, lies in the media, dishonesty, swearing neighbors and Facebook garbage discussions of anything and everything. Walk blamelessly.
How to become stronger not only physically, but also spiritually?
And this is the first thing that makes me strong.
I want to become a strong person
Do you want to become a strong personality?
Pay attention to these simple recommendations:
- Do some self-reflection
. Think about your preferences and desires. Take several personality tests and answer unexpected questions from them. You probably still don’t understand what kind of person you are - figure it out. - Achieve your goals
, both small and significant. With every task completed, self-esteem will grow.
- Play sports
. A person who strives to become strong in spirit must not forget about the strength of the body.
- Improve your speaking skills
, work on developing eye contact. When talking, look into the eyes of your interlocutor for so long that you can at least determine the color of his eyes.
- Have your own opinion
, don't give in to pressure. Don't go to extremes: be confident, but not cocky. Advice from wise people is appropriate, but think with your own head, do not follow public opinion.
- Don't be superficial
. Go deeper into the study of issues that are relevant to you, draw conclusions after fully studying the information.
- Remember your inner strength, remind yourself of it
. Mentally say: “I am strong”, “I can cope with any problem”, “I will overcome obstacles”, “I will succeed.”
An example of living in a lie
I have a friend. who lied a lot before coming to God.
And she later admitted that it’s so difficult to remember who and what you lied to.
This is a good example.
The man is confused and no longer knows where and what he said.
Honesty is the best strategy.
And besides, honesty gives strength.
Don't fool yourself, tell the truth
A strong-willed person – what is he like?
Step 3. Strength lies in not throwing around words, but keeping your word.
Jesus Christ said very simply and clearly:
“Let your word be: yes, yes; no no; and anything beyond this is from the evil one.”
Promises and words carry enormous weight.
It is important to keep them under control. It is important to store
And at the same time, it is important to be a person who does not say much, but simply says: “Yes” or simply “No”.
It is important to think through all your promises and words to others.
And live while giving benefit to others as much as possible.
How to become a stronger woman in spirit and character
Girls are more fragile creatures than men. Of course, there are exceptions when the “woman” is not afraid to get into a fight and pulls the “TV” guy and a bunch of children. But every exception was preceded by its own sad story, when there was no one who would stand like a mountain in front of her and look into the eyes of all her difficulties. It's not about that kind of “power”. Now society places high demands on women.
Many people respect strong-willed women who will not give up in any difficulty and will not give up in problems. Who will support their man and show a radiant face and kindness, and their best friend will be a pillow (that’s what our grandmothers used to say - that’s where strong women were!). How to strengthen the spirit of gentle female personalities when there are so many demands placed on them from the outside:
- We don't expect much from others. Women are susceptible to beautiful words, they are gullible, and they sometimes take advantage of this. Therefore, you need to free yourself from illusions about other people. We tend to expect from others what we would do ourselves, but no! Don’t expect the same reaction as you, the same spiritual closeness that you experience, the same return. If you are disappointed, then this is not the person for you.
- Use your femininity correctly. Don’t take everything upon yourself, but don’t sit on someone’s neck with your legs dangling either. A strong-willed woman knows when to “turn on” a weak woman and when to show her back.
- Free yourself from psychological trauma. Many women had to experience moral or other pressure. Some endured and “moved on,” while others broke. To develop fortitude, you need to free yourself from past baggage. And if you need specialist help, don’t delay. You know, it’s better to sit at an appointment with a psychologist than to lie comfortably in a psychiatry.
- Take care of yourself. Any woman dreams of looking better, looking younger, this inspires her, energizes her and gives her confidence. To develop moral strength, tidy up your face, figure, and apartment. Cleaning, you know, also has psychotherapeutic value!
- Say no to procrastination. This is a habit of postponing everything until later. It takes a lot of energy, time and effort. Learn to finish what you start. It will be difficult at first, but then you will say “thank you” to yourself or me after reading this article!
- Set personal boundaries. Don't allow anyone to treat you with disrespect. Be it parents, husband, children, etc. If you decide to inflict offense in response, I do not advise it. This will also destroy you as a person. Just learn to say “no”, leave on time, burn bridges when it comes to health and life.
- Well, develop yourself. Many strong women are characterized by a constant craving for new things: new knowledge, new skills, new income!
Strong-willed woman
Strength is in a kept promise
In Psalm 14, which I quoted above, David says: “Whoever swears... and does not change, even if it is to harm himself.”
What is the strength of the spirit?
That is, in other words, David makes it clear that a person must keep his word. Even if it is no longer useful to him, does not bring results and is even harmful.
Step 4. Strength of spirit is to build the right relationships with others
David says some interesting things in Psalm 14
who does not slander with his tongue, does not do harm to his sincere, and does not accept reproach against his neighbor,
he in whose eyes the outcast is despised, but who glorifies those who fear the Lord; who swears, even to an evil person, and does not change;
That is, being strong means other things too:
Don't slander. don't do evil to someone who lives nearby
Do not accept negativity towards your neighbor, towards the one you love and value.
Support the weak (Cheer up the outcasts, that is, help and support those who have been rejected by others)
Respect and support those who fear and honor God.
It's all about relationships with people around you.
If I line them up correctly, I am strong. And I don’t depend on outside opinions, on the opinions of people around me.
Strength lies in harmonious relationships with your neighbors.
Step 5. Where to find strength? In silence and trust in the Almighty, in God
In April 2022, I had a pep talk on this topic at a home group and decided to share it with you too.
In conditions of the wildest uncertainty, it is important to understand where we can really draw strength from. Many people try to find it in the news, in relying on their own strength or finances, in an alliance with stronger people, or in something else (Substitute what you see fit)
I want to share the most practical answer that I found for myself.
Israel at the time of Isaiah hoped for an alliance with stronger allies, the countries of Egypt and Assyria. But this did not bring strength. (Isaiah 30:1-13)
We draw strength from where we put our attention. Scripture says this:
“For thus says the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: If you had remained in place and at rest, you would have been saved; in silence and trust is your strength;”
(Isaiah 30:15)
Strength is in silence and hope.
When we spend time in silence alone with the Almighty.
And when we sincerely hope in Him.
Unreal inner strength comes. The heart is at peace and the mind is clear. #HeartPureMindClear
General advice from a psychologist on how to become strong
Strength of spirit is one of the main characteristics of charismatic, successful people. Possessing this quality, a person overcomes obstacles, struggles with difficulties in his life, falls and gets up again. Many psychologists interpret this personality characteristic differently, but I liked this explanation of it: this is the ability to manage your thoughts, emotions and have a positive attitude towards everything.
And everything would be perfect, but how to achieve this power? I have great news for you: it can be developed! You can safely live by your principles, be a confident person and achieve success. And below we will talk about ways to develop fortitude, which helps you get stronger physically and mentally. You will find a lot of advice from psychologists on this topic, but I will write here really effective ones that will help you.
The basis of fortitude is your beliefs.
I'll start right away with the most difficult one. It is our beliefs, our belief in something that makes us who we really are. If you believe that “all men are assholes,” you will certainly treat your few male acquaintances this way. Hence the failures in relationships, hence the betrayals and your suffering, hence the difficulties that do not strengthen you, but, on the contrary, destroy you.
You can help yourself improve your fortitude when you evaluate your beliefs. Identify beliefs that divide your world into black and white, tune in to exceptions from black. To make it clear, I will give an example.
A man raised by a single mother. And everything is in order for him, but he is not used to taking responsibility for his actions. He believes in this truth: no matter what he does, he will be held accountable - this is his belief. The guy often flares up like a match and in a fit of emotion can say a lot of unnecessary things, and also believes that he is not responsible for his words either.
Situation: he is dating a girl, she became pregnant, the guy, tired, hears this news. In a fit of negative emotions (he did not count on family relationships - this is not part of his plans) he says that he does not need a child, it is unknown whose it is, and she is also no longer impressive in her position. Result: the loss of a girlfriend, a child, and it is still unknown how many such girls he had and will have. Is he strong in spirit?..
So, different beliefs either spoil our lives or allow us to develop. A person’s basic beliefs are a layer that is extremely difficult to change. But as eminent psychologists say, awareness of the problem is a huge step towards solving it. If you understand what limits you, then there is a chance to develop fortitude and change. True, identifying beliefs sometimes requires intensive work by a psychologist.
Save your energy
In other words, don't be afraid of what you can't change. If you worry about the hurricane that is predicted to happen tomorrow, about the virus that is spreading around the world at a rapid pace, you will simply waste your energy reserves and end up with zero. These thoughts will exhaust you, and when the moment of manifestation of moral strength comes, it simply will not be there!
The advice is that you focus on situations that you can control. If there is a hurricane, then don’t worry in vain, but do everything to prevent destruction as much as possible (seal up the windows, nail additional slate on the roof, stock up on water, salt, matches). If it is a virus, then strengthen its disease prevention (drink immunomodulators, do not go to crowded places, eat vitamins).
This will help you conserve energy for more important things in your life. When you notice that your thoughts are going “in the wrong direction,” it’s time to return them “to their place.” Think about useful topics.
Letting go of negative thinking
People become stronger mentally if they work on positive thinking. With such work, the attitude towards oneself changes (a person begins to love and respect himself), and the world becomes brighter and more joyful. Such statements “I won’t succeed”, “I’m doing everything wrong”, “everything is bad” bind you in chains and completely inhibit the development of your potential. But by tuning into positive thinking, you become stronger and better.
Get out of your comfort zone
In moderation. You have the right to live the way you want and be in your comfort zone. But practice shows that constant comfort relaxes a person and does not contribute to his change or personal growth. Therefore, my advice to you is to sometimes get out of your comfort zone! What am I talking about?
Some discomfort will help you become stronger in spirit and character. Let's say you want to become more sociable, but it makes you uncomfortable. To learn this, get out of your comfort zone, that is, stretch yourself. And for the next week, open up to people without fear of consequences, get involved in conversations, express your opinion, enjoy communication!
This way you will change your character, gain new skills and become strong in spirit. Your dreams will turn into reality. The same mental mechanisms work here as with affirmation, only you get straight to the point.
Celebrate your results
Gaining fortitude is sometimes a painful and slow process. Often, with a long-term development perspective, motivation fades away. With constant problems, emotional burnout may even develop and there is no time for personal development, but at least to preserve the barely warm energy.
In this case, encouragement will help - celebrate your achievements and the results of working on yourself. At the end of each day, take a few minutes to reflect: what you have achieved, what successes and failures you had today, what new things happened, what thoughts came to you today.
Above, I described the fundamental points that help “rise from the bottom to the top.” That is, work not only on skills, but also on your personality. Now take a few simple tips that will help you take small steps towards developing fortitude:
- learn to be flexible and firm in accordance with the situation, do not always be too soft or domineering;
- go towards the goal, even when you have no strength left;
- make wise decisions - if necessary, stop in time, the decision to “give up everything” is based on emotions, and “stop in time” is balanced and logically justified;
- even if it doesn’t work out the hundredth time, it will definitely work out the 101st time - let this be your motto during difficulties;
- learn to say “no” even to skilled manipulators;
- Gradually limit toxic people from communicating with you so that they do not poison you with their negativity.
Take responsibility for your life
To become strong, you need to be a responsible person. This is something that many young people often run away from. Responsibility requires admitting your mistakes, actions, participating in some process, and then correcting all negative consequences. But many are accustomed to pretending that they have not seen anything and know nothing, which allows them to avoid the need to correct the situation.
If you stop being afraid, running away, and start taking responsibility, then you will become much stronger. Responsibility forces you to face situations, not run away from them, solve them and fix them. If you eliminate problems that arise, then you become confident.
Strength is the confidence that you can do anything and handle anything. How can you understand this if in fact you are running away from problems?
Why do men become weak?
Women, as usual, have their own opinions on this matter. But I’ll tell you this: if you were raised as a real man from childhood, there would be fewer problems in your life. Let's be honest: 90% of character is formed in childhood. And if your mother and grandmother raised you, forcing you to put on a hat even in the heat and obey everything, feeding you pies, borscht and patting you on the head, you simply don’t know what it’s like to be a man. Unfortunately, they don’t teach this at school or even at university.
If there was a dad, you were lucky, but was he definitely a normal example for you? Or all that could be learned from him was how to drink beer in front of the TV or hang out somewhere fishing with men? There could be many situations - the result is the same. And he doesn't suit you, right?
Help people
A person becomes strong when he helps other people. Firstly, he tries his hand and understands what he is capable of. Secondly, it makes the world a better place, which gives even more enthusiasm and strength.
Help your loved ones. Remember those situations when you helped out your friends, loved ones and relatives. What feelings overwhelmed you? How did other people react to your help? A smile is a worthy price to pay for doing a good deed. If you know that your help will benefit someone else, then go for it. And you will be pleased that you turned out to be a useful person, and other people will be pleased that someone cares about them.
Don't be lazy. Help and please. There are moments when you don't want to do anything, although you understand that the other person needs your help. But think for yourself, what would you think if you knew that they were refusing to help you just because they were lazy? You may not be offended, but you will no longer have any pleasant thoughts or impulses towards those people who extol their laziness above helping their neighbor.
Your help makes the person you help happy. Your help is especially useful when you are 100% sure that you are doing the right thing. For example, you were asked for help or you know that a person cannot do without something, so you want to eliminate his discomfort. Help and please. You yourself will be pleased that you not only make someone happy, but are simply a useful person. Moreover, people remember your help, so they are happy to help you when they see that you need something.
What distinguishes strong and weak people?
- A strong person overcomes any difficulties and eliminates problems, while weak individuals need and seek help from others.
- A strong person does not give up and does not give up when difficulties arise. A weak individual turns a problem into a tragedy in order to further weaken himself, make him helpless and unhappy.
- A strong person has desires and goals, while a weak person has needs and wants.
- A strong person has his own opinion, which he is not afraid to defend and follow. A weak person is afraid to express his opinion and often changes it under the influence of the points of view of others.
- A strong person does not need help. Of course, he can take advantage of the resources and strength of those around him, especially if his resources and strength are not enough to complete some task, but he is not helpless. He solves all his problems himself, and communicates and cooperates with other people to achieve common benefits. A weak person usually cannot do anything on his own. He is defenseless, constantly in need of protection and support. A weak person does not use his resources, even if he has them. He prefers to use the help of those around him, who should not only help, but also do his work instead of him.
- A strong person goes beyond the generally accepted and stereotyped. He is able to control his emotions and actions. A weak person usually acts within the framework of patterns: he thinks in a pattern, acts in a pattern, does not control his manifestations and constantly finds excuses why he is not to blame.
- A strong person is afraid, but does not give in to his own fear. A weak person is not only afraid, but also allows his fear to dictate how he behaves.
A strong person more adequately perceives situations that may be unpleasant for him. All people have negative experiences. However, a strong personality turns his negative experiences into lessons that should teach him something, while a weak personality will lament, regret, cry and feel sorry for himself because of what happened.
Strengthening inner support and fortitude
There is another effective and useful exercise. It is necessary to take a comfortable position that involves relaxation. Eyes should be closed. Imagine looking into yourself. You will be able to feel some kind of inner space. It is noteworthy that it is not located inside the body, but outside it. Although you feel it in yourself.
Say “I Am” in your thoughts. Repeat the phrase several times. Feel where exactly inside the response to it occurs. You feel as if a point deep within resonates with these words.
You need to concentrate on this point. Repeat “I Am” to yourself again. You should feel that some kind of support is forming inside your body. She is your center. Say “I Am” again and concentrate on the fulcrum until you feel the center very clearly.
Then you should imagine that you are trying to root yourself in such a support. You are in the center more and more confidently and penetrate into it, as if putting down roots. Appreciate the sensations that fill you. If peace and tranquility are strongly expressed, then you did everything right.
