Pregnant woman: psychology of behavior, fears and expectations

Pregnancy is a specific state of the body that affects a woman’s psyche. Even a long-awaited pregnancy is a strong stress, the reason for a sharp change in the usual way of life.

The psychology of a pregnant woman undergoes significant changes that affect perception, worldview, and relationships with others. Knowing the characteristics of the psyche will help you develop the right strategy of behavior, avoid common mistakes, and fully enjoy the wonderful state of waiting for a new life.

Changes in the psyche of a pregnant woman

From the moment of pregnancy, a woman’s body is rebuilt, preparing to bear and give birth to a child. Changes in hormonal levels affect character, habits, tastes, self-perception, and worldview. The approach of childbirth increases nervousness, fears, and fuels the fears of the expectant mother. Her emotional state becomes unstable. She pays attention to things that were previously insignificant. The expectant mother becomes very vulnerable, sensitive, and often gets irritated over trifles. Many experience a sharp change in mood from intense joy to an attack of aggression.

The woman feels distant from others, misunderstood, rejected. She unconsciously builds a protective wall, trying to hide from possible problems and complications. Pregnancy encourages the expectant mother to distance herself from any negative phenomena and focus on the feeling of herself and the child. The stronger the excitement, the lower the woman’s readiness for childbirth. Therefore, the priority task of the relatives is to surround the pregnant woman with care and provide all possible support.

How hormones affect the expectant mother's body

To understand the emotions of a pregnant woman, it is important to understand what they depend on.

  • Chorionic gonadotropin (hCG, hCG) is a hormone that begins to be produced immediately after implantation of the embryo, that is, on the 6th – 8th day after fertilization of the egg. Its sharp surge indicates the fact of conception, and an increase in the level over time indicates that the pregnancy is developing safely. This hormone seems to tell the body that it now needs to take care of the unborn baby, and thereby changes the functioning of many of its systems: the monthly cycle of egg ripening stops, and resistance to stress increases. And although the exact mechanism of morning sickness is not known to doctors, some associate it with this hormone.
  • The second important hormone for a pregnant woman is progesterone. Its production allows the muscles of the uterus to remain in a relaxed state, and the body not to reject the DNA of the new organism. However, this hormone also relaxes other muscles, which leads to a decrease in blood pressure, possible dizziness, as well as heartburn, reflux, increased gas formation, nausea and other symptoms. Progesterone can also cause excess body hair growth.
  • Estrogen levels also increase. It is important for fetal development and helps the uterus respond to the influence of oxytocin, another important hormone. An increased level of estrogen leads to the appearance of spider veins and age spots, nausea, increases appetite, and it is also responsible for the delicate beauty of pregnant women - when they are said to be glowing.
  • As pregnancy progresses, oxytocin helps the nipples produce milk and dilate the cervix.
  • Prolactin helps the body secrete milk and has a calming effect on the expectant mother.
  • Relaxin prepares the body for childbirth, helping the necessary tissues to stretch, which leads to the fact that all joints of the body become more mobile during pregnancy; pain and burning sensations may also appear, and the woman often begins to feel clumsy.

Now that you understand how complex the hormonal cocktail in the blood of an expectant mother is, it is easy to realize that fluctuations in your mood are a natural manifestation of the coordinated work of all systems of your body. So there is no need to blame yourself for them.

Features of the psychology of the first trimester

The first three months of pregnancy cause severe aggravation of all senses. Tastes and smells are felt more strongly, many pregnant women suffer from toxicosis. Deep fears hidden before the onset of the perinatal period become stronger. The expectant mother worries about every dangerous action that could harm the fetus. Many people experience problems with sleep, systematic fainting, and pressure surges. To reduce the manifestation of unpleasant symptoms, a pregnant woman should rest more, distancing herself from negative emotions.

Sensitivity changes

  • Men absolutely do not understand that their wife's sense of smell has changed. It would never occur to anyone who hasn't been pregnant how disgusting a refrigerator can smell. And how unbearably new shoe polish smells, or, God forbid, yesterday’s socks.
  • A man cannot even imagine what a person feels when he feels sick almost all the time, as if he had eaten something stale during a strong rocking motion on a ship.
  • It’s also difficult to imagine how strange a person feels who can’t now eat their favorite omelet or sandwich for breakfast - their taste has changed so much. Your favorite food has become disgusting, and new preferences have not yet formed - and how to live?.. But many of us are accustomed to eating difficult moments in life.
  • The inability of many pregnant women to enjoy food is associated with a reluctance to cook - after all, if everything doesn’t taste good to you, you’re unlikely to be able to prepare a worthwhile meal.
  • Many foods smell unbearably for a pregnant woman just at the moment of preparation - that is, already fried fish can, for example, be eaten with pleasure, but cutting, frying and smelling the same fish at this time is absolutely impossible.
  • The usual pile of unwashed dishes, as well as the smell of any product from the usual arsenal of household chemicals, can become unbearable.

It is easiest to talk about changes in taste sensitivity and increased perception of smells in the most general form, as if you are not talking about yourself, but simply telling how the world works.
“Do you know, dear, that pregnant women…” And then a long list of what you yourself are experiencing and what you heard about from your friends. Almost every man who does not suffer from personal immaturity and chronic fatigue is ready to accept the taste quirks of his pregnant wife. The list of products you need to buy at the supermarket may change. You worked for a long time to teach your husband to find the necessary products of the right brand on the shelves, and he finally remembered and mastered this list. But now you need to start all over again, but it’s difficult for a man to guess this himself.

A pregnant woman's taste preferences are known to be inconsistent - you wanted, for example, an avocado (just like in O'Henry's story about peaches), but your husband spent time getting this avocado. But it turns out that you can’t even see him, although only 2-3 hours have passed.

In this case, you have an ironclad argument - the child inside is growing very quickly, the changes are simply cosmic, so that the pregnant woman herself and her desires are in a space where time would otherwise flow.

Feel free to say that you are surprised at yourself, and especially at the change in food desires. The argument used here is ironclad: the child is growing quickly, and what he may need in the next moment is completely unknown to anyone, including you in the first place. Some eastern languages ​​have a special verb that denotes the fleeting whim of a pregnant woman.

Features of the psychology of the third trimester

Shortly before giving birth, a woman is immersed in emotional contact with her child. It’s as if she exists with him in a separate world, exchanging experiences, emotions, sensations. The world around us is perceived indirectly: the woman becomes withdrawn, detached, and absent-minded. The ability to think logically is often impaired.

The only priority before childbirth is the well-being of the baby. The woman communicates with him, constantly touches his stomach, and can determine his emotional state by the movements of the fetus. Often a strong connection allows you to feel changes in development and the danger of premature birth.

Selectivity in communication

You may experience an unexpected craving for some people from your environment and an inexplicable aversion to others.

A pregnant woman sometimes wonders to herself: how is this so? Aunt Masha always just turned her off, there was nothing to talk to her about, but now she’s just drawn to her like a magnet. But, for example, N - he was such a wonderful, subtle and smart interlocutor, but now it’s impossible to sit next to him, you just want to leave the room.

The fact is that pregnant women live mainly by intuition, and they are able to “read the subtext” in the people around them - that is, they perceive non-verbal information more strongly. It can be especially difficult for a pregnant woman to bear tipsy people - they smell disgusting, and their “subtext” can be very different.

It’s best to say to your husband: “You know, I feel somehow uncomfortable next to this person. I feel great about him, but something is interfering with our communication. But it is believed that it is harmful for pregnant women to overpower themselves. This is your friend (relative, employee), I have nothing against him, you communicate, and I’ll just take a break.” The main thing is that there should be no harsh assessments or condemnation on your part, especially if we are talking about a person who is significant to your husband.

A woman's acceptance of a new life

The main syndrome of normal pregnancy is the woman’s acceptance of the fact of the development of a new life inside her. She not only accepts the pregnancy, but begins to imagine the child, fantasize about his appearance, worry about his fate, and plan for future motherhood.

Under the influence of a changed attitude towards one’s condition, one’s attitude towards the world around us changes. In the second half of the perinatal period, a woman is prone to:

  1. Behave infantilely, partially adopting the features of a child’s perception of the world.
  2. Be offended, angry, and blame family members for lack of attention for no reason.
  3. Show increased interest in home improvement and strive to improve it.

Full fusion with the child is manifested in the awareness of his needs as one’s main interest. The woman becomes one with the developing fetus, assessing all phenomena of the world as suitable or unsuitable for the child’s life.

First months of pregnancy

The first months of pregnancy are a time of revolutionary changes not only in a woman’s physiology, but also in her psychology.
In the inner, hidden space of her “I”, the space of another person appeared, whose existence must not only be taken into account, but perhaps the whole life must be rebuilt, all plans must be changed. Not everyone can accept these changes unconditionally. Even if the child is desired and long-awaited, the enormity of the accomplished event captures all the woman’s thoughts, making her worry: “How will my life develop next? How will the pregnancy proceed? What will happen to my career? Will I be able to provide my baby with a decent future? Will I be a good mother? Familiar questions, aren't they? Such mental anguish can cause not only a feeling of fatigue and irritability, but even cause toxicosis or the threat of miscarriage. Psychologist's answer

First, don't try to solve all problems at once. Set them aside for an indefinite period of time, and perhaps some of them will be resolved without your participation. And in general, pregnancy is a unique time when you can rightfully allow yourself not to react to life’s problems. And not feel guilty for such irresponsible behavior. Remember that more than all the material benefits in the world, a child needs your attention, understanding and love.

Secondly, the most important thing now is to realize and accept your new state. Give yourself permission to be pregnant. Accepting your new state means accepting the appearance of a child in your life and learning to understand his needs. Indulge your little weaknesses - be it the desire to lie down in the middle of the day or buy yourself some delicacy. Let pregnancy enter your life not as a time of prohibitions, but as a time of new opportunities. A statement like “I won’t be able to wear my favorite skinny jeans” can be replaced with: “Finally, I’m updating my wardrobe!” It is enough to change your point of view to get a taste for change.

Symptoms of high expectations for pregnancy and childbirth

The expectant mother creates an ideal fantasy - the image of a child, his father, a model of living together, raising and parenting. Gestation encourages a woman to compensate for physical inconveniences with dreams of the future. The further reality is from ideal ideas, the more difficult pregnancy is.

The need for support encourages one to manipulate others and demand special treatment. The masculine role of the husband in the wife's mind changes to the new dominant role of the father. If the husband does not correspond to the ideal image, the expectant mother's attitude towards him changes. She becomes aggressive, irritable, and overly emotional.

How to overcome excessive demands on yourself

Pregnancy is a time to deal with anxiety and learn to relieve yourself of the burden of personal responsibility.

Looking for peace of mind

Pregnancy is a difficult process. The main metamorphoses are hidden in the depths and are not visible to us. In trying to control everything, a woman spends a lot of effort and wastes a lot of energy instead of calming down, finding balance and leaning on it. Now you need to find and maintain a state in which you are balanced, calm, feeling yourself, attentive and friendly to yourself.

Preserving individuality

There is no standard pregnancy, but there are varied and unique ones. Each of them reflects the life story behind the woman. Trying to fit your own, one-of-a-kind story into an image imposed by someone means not truly living your pregnancy, limiting yourself to a fake that imitates it. Listen to how your personality, with the accumulated experience of everything you have experienced, reveals itself in a new state for you. Pregnancy is more about self-absorption than social activity.

Learning to be flexible

Pregnancy and childbirth, no matter how carefully you prepare for them, still rarely turn out the way you planned. Here everything will happen by itself, and it is impossible to control this process. Therefore, you should relieve yourself of unnecessary responsibility and simply live, waiting for the happy moment of meeting your baby.

Look for simple and proven options in everything. Agusha dairy products, some of which expectant mothers receive free of charge at dairy kitchens, will allow you not to worry about how to provide yourself with food with a sufficient amount of calcium. You can be confident in the safety, high quality and beneficial properties of Agusha dairy products.

Prenatal phobias

One of the psychological features of the first pregnancy is fear caused by the unknown. A woman who knows about the perinatal period only in theory does not know what to expect, how to behave correctly, or prepare for childbirth. For women with children, fears are more specific: problems that accompanied the first pregnancy cause concern during subsequent ones.

Common fears:

  • painful, long labor;
  • birth injuries;
  • congenital pathologies;
  • death of a child during childbirth;
  • postpartum complications.

Problems of prenatal phobias are solved by eliminating the causes of fear. To dispel doubts, it is useful for a woman to communicate with young mothers who have had a positive pregnancy experience. Communication with your own mother and older relatives who have already gone through all the stages of motherhood can help. In order not to aggravate the situation, the expectant mother should be surrounded with a positive emotional background, protected, supported, and prevented from nervous shock.

How to stop striving for the “perfect” pregnancy

Whether we like it or not, society has a strong idea of ​​what pregnancy should be like. According to him, a smiling, full of energy expectant mother carefully monitors her health, eats right, has time to breathe fresh air every day, goes to childbirth preparation courses, to the pool and to yoga for pregnant women. At the same time, she actively works until her maternity leave, achieving success. Such a mother’s home is always perfectly clean, healthy, balanced meals are prepared on the stove, and in her purse there is a plan for future births.

But reality doesn't look like that. Even if everything is in order, a pregnant woman may be bothered by gas, shortness of breath, skin problems, aching joints, back pain and disgust at the mere thought of gymnastics, a swimming pool or a walk in the park... And now the expectant mother feels “wrong”, not capable of coping with what is considered by everyone around to be the most natural state of a woman, her purpose and the main meaning of life. Thoughts about a pregnancy that does not fit into the “ideal” are the road to self-disappointment and depression.

There is another extreme. Ignoring their own desires, needs and body signals, some expectant mothers try to do everything to make their pregnancy seem prosperous. At this time, when her main desire should be the desire to relax and feel harmony, the woman brings herself to stress.

She thoroughly studies all reference materials, spends a lot of time searching for the best, most modern bandage, tirelessly analyzes her own diet, weighs herself and controls her nutrition, takes tests strictly on time, argues with doctors about brands of different vitamins, studies all the obstetricians in the city, prescribes a birth plan with a scientific basis for each stage, attends classes in two schools at once to prepare for childbirth (so as not to miss anything), listens to classical music on a schedule, and researches various early development methods in advance. Is it worth doing this? Sooner or later your strength will run out, and just at the very moment when you really need it.

A pregnant woman's impatience—the desire to hasten the birth

The desire to quickly bring the moment of birth closer, impatient anticipation, increasing excitement are symptoms of the last stage of the perinatal period. A woman strives to quickly transition to the status of a young mother, to change her passive role to an active one. During this period, there are frequent mood swings, increased phobias, even panic attacks.

The symbiosis of mother and child persists after successful resolution of pregnancy. But the child, who was previously a fantasy image, becomes reality. Waiting for the baby to move from the waiting stage to the stage of real interaction is the main reason for impatience in the last trimester.

How to overcome the fear of childbirth

Childbirth is a natural part of life. Everyone passes through them when they are born. A woman passes through them, giving birth to her baby. Why does this natural, normal act cause fear? Because the expectant mother does not have enough information, but has a lot of worries, anxiety and fear of change. Let's look at what can be opposed to each of these conditions.

Raising awareness

Try to find out everything that interests you from reliable sources, which include trusted websites, high-quality books about pregnancy and childbirth, consultations with specialists, and childbirth preparation courses. You should not read stories on the Internet or trust the stories of your girlfriends.

Helplessness will be replaced by readiness and calm.

Increasing frequency of contractions is a signal that the process is going as it should. A contraction is just a muscle tension. Knowledge is power, and during childbirth, strength is very, very necessary.

Being aware of modern anesthesia techniques will help you. Talk to your doctor, ask him all the questions, share your doubts.

We realize the joint efforts during childbirth

Many women worry that they will have to go through the very moment of childbirth without the support of loved ones. But it is worth remembering that in this process there is another full participant who performs a very important and difficult part of the work. These efforts are given to him with great difficulty, he gets very tired and does everything to help you. This is your child. Moving along the birth canal, he changes position twice, adapting to the features of his first route. So you go through this process together with the person closest to you.

We take responsibility

To stop being afraid of childbirth, you need to admit that life will really change. This will bring you relief: now, instead of being afraid of change, you recognize it as a given.

Motherhood is a new life, and it begins with childbirth. At this moment you become a mother - responsible and caring. And then there will be fewer complications during childbirth, tension will subside, energy will be spent not on worries, but on pushing and helping the baby in the birth process.

The impact of pregnancy on the relationship with your husband

During pregnancy, family life fades into the background: the woman is absorbed in internal experiences, significantly cools off towards her husband, and her priority interest is the child. If a woman is consumed by fears, pregnancy is complicated by diseases and various restrictions. This depresses the woman even more and makes her withdraw into herself. It may seem to a husband that his wife has stopped loving him, but these changes are features of a woman’s psychology during pregnancy. To ease the psychological state of his beloved, the husband should accept these characteristics, surround him with care, try not to put pressure, and not show dissatisfaction.

The impossibility of full physical intimacy significantly complicates the relationship with her husband: physiological changes affect a woman’s libido and reduce sexual activity. During this period, many men think about cheating as a way of compensation and stress relief. Such selfishness on the part of the future father will become another stress factor for the woman. Therefore, a man needs to wait out a difficult period, thinking about the comfort of his wife. Carrying a child requires physical and emotional costs, the task of a loving husband is to support his wife and help her cope with the most exciting, difficult and important stage of life.

The psychologist will dwell in more detail on the questions: what happens to a pregnant woman and how to behave with her?

Rules of psychological hygiene

While expecting a baby, the expectant mother hears a lot of advice around her, she is told stories about pregnancy and childbirth, often imposing her own opinion. When communicating with friends, relatives, in line for a consultation, on the Internet, she listens to different points of view. This communication sometimes causes anxiety, the expectant mother thinks too much about pregnancy, but the number of fears does not decrease at all. What can be done to deal with this?

  • Accept your fears and anxieties as a given. Any feeling will go away if you don’t fight it, but just calmly experience it. The more you worry, the worse: chronic stress negatively affects your condition and the well-being of your baby.
  • Find a physical activity that really suits you, is enjoyable, enjoyable and distracting.
  • Realize yourself in creativity and hobbies. Look at the beautiful, think about the beautiful.
  • Limit communication with those who spoil your mood and scare you with unpleasant stories. Let there be people around you who support you.
  • Meet a calm, confident mother who, from the perspective of personal experience, can sometimes suggest, encourage, and support something.
  • Make an appointment with a psychologist, preferably on the recommendation of a person you trust.

Be happy and relaxed, enjoy your pregnancy and the changes that are happening to you.

Recommendations for pregnant women on daily routine


pregnant girl doing yoga in the morning

  • Increased sleepiness is one of the signs of pregnancy. Therefore, allow yourself to sleep for 8 hours at night and up to 2 hours during the day.
  • Spend at least 3 hours outdoors every day. Morning walks are especially beneficial.
  • Do light gymnastics and yoga for pregnant women.
  • Eat at the same time every day.
  • Listen to pleasant music, read books, do handicrafts.
  • Clean the house, but do not lift or move heavy objects.
  • If you work, review your schedule and workload with your manager. Eliminate night shifts and business trips, replace harmful conditions with easy ones.

Hypertension in pregnant women: recommendations


a doctor measures a pregnant woman’s blood pressure to understand the presence of hypertension.
Let’s start with the fact that there are 2 types of hypertension in pregnant women:

  • chronic, that is, one that was present before the baby began to bear
  • temporary, inherent in the 2nd and 3rd trimesters, which disappears after delivery

To accurately understand your blood pressure picture:

  • buy yourself a device to measure it
  • use it up to 3 times a day and record the results in a notepad
  • during measurements, be in a sitting position
  • ask for help to determine the pressure reading using the device from your husband or relatives
  • compare the records with the results of measuring your blood pressure in the clinic
  • have your urine analyzed to determine the amount of protein.

As prescribed by your doctor, take only one drug if you have a confirmed diagnosis of hypertension.

Before you start taking medications and/or are admitted to a day hospital for medication to lower your blood pressure, consult with several other specialists in other clinics.

Remember that your peace of mind and a minimum of taking pharmaceuticals are the key to your baby’s health and a successful birth.

Prenatal vitamins: recommendations


a girl with a big belly holds an apple and a handful of vitamins in her hands.
Although the period of bearing a baby is not a disease, women are characterized by a fear of a lack of vitamins and minerals in their body. That’s why they often buy vitamin complexes and take them almost before giving birth.

You should know that a sufficiently balanced diet has the full range and doses of valuable substances for your body and baby.

Vitamins are indicated in the following cases:

  • health characteristics of a pregnant woman, when her body does not absorb specific types of nutrients or does not receive them at all due to diet,
  • living in countries where there is a deficiency of specific vitamins. For example, in the north of Russia - iodine, in Africa - D,
  • nutrition is not balanced and sufficient.

The World Association of Obstetricians is unanimous in the need for women to take folic acid before and in the first trimester of pregnancy.

If you are advised to take vitamins while raising a child, then:

  • be guided by the results of your tests and the recommendations of the observing gynecologist,
  • give preference to children's vitamins.

People's advice for pregnant women


A late-term pregnant woman walks through the autumn park

  • When you are scared, try not to grab your hands or touch your face or other parts of your body. The baby is more likely to develop birthmarks in these places.
  • Before taking medicinal herbs, carefully read their properties. Many of nature's gifts are contraindicated during pregnancy.
  • Look at beautiful and healthy people, nature, classical works of art.
  • Avoid horseback riding, cycling, jumping and active physical activities.
  • Enlist the support of your husband and family to move heavy objects, hang laundry, or lift anything up.
  • Replenish your wardrobe with spacious items so that the waist area remains without constriction.
  • Eat chalk or drink its water solution daily if you feel a craving for it.
  • Check your teeth regularly and treat them as needed.
  • Avoid exposure to rubella, especially during the first 4 months of pregnancy.
  • Monitor your bowel movements. Taking laxatives can provoke unwanted uterine contractions.
  • Pay attention to armpit hygiene to avoid the development of breast diseases.
  • Drink freshly squeezed vegetable juices, especially carrot juice.
  • For better skin support and to prevent stretch marks, wear a bandage in the last trimester.
  • Refrain from intimacy with your husband during pregnancy.
  • Delve into the essence of your test results to understand the picture of your health.

Diet tips for pregnant women


a pregnant girl eats a salad of fresh vegetables and herbs.
Nutrition for any person, not just a pregnant woman, provides restoration of strength and support for activity. It should be as natural as possible, without snacks, fast food, colored sodas and similar examples. Salads with mayonnaise do not grow in the garden beds, and there are no store-bought colas or kvass in the wells.

  • An important point - choose products according to the season characteristic of the area where you live. They make up the lion's share of your diet.

Read more about the nuances of nutrition during pregnancy here.

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