In this article we will tell you:
- 13 women's secrets to attract a man's attention
- Advice from a psychologist on how to draw a man’s attention to himself in various situations
- 5 rules for communicating with a man to make him pay attention
- Mistakes women make in trying to attract a man's attention
How to attract the attention of a man who does not understand subtle hints? Sometimes flirting does not bring a woman the result she expected. Perhaps it’s a matter of male thick skin, since we won’t even consider the option of a lack of interest on his part. Everyone is subject to a woman’s charm; the only question is the degree to which a man is “married.”
Well, if you are interested in a charming, modest botanist who does not understand hints at all, it’s time to put the “heavy artillery” on alert. When random touches and even an invitation for a cup of coffee do not bring results, this can only spur a woman’s interest. Excitement is a great incentive that will allow you to attract the attention of a man.
How to get a guy's attention depending on the situation
Now let's talk about more specific steps towards the guy you want. Depending on your place of communication, the situation itself and the opportunities to attract attention change. We will list specific points specific to the place of action.
On social networks
It’s easier to communicate on the Internet - you have time to think and respond, you can express your words with emoticons, you can greet with a sticker, it won’t be so unpleasant if you refuse.
On the Internet, everyone seems more attractive, his non-verbal reaction (gestures, facial expressions, attention in his eyes), the intonation of his voice are not visible, and it is not at all clear whether he is writing this.
Solution:
- treat correspondence as an adventure, and not as a marriage acquaintance;
- comment on his words or actions;
- conduct an unobtrusive conversation, sometimes write, be interested in him, talk less about himself, encourage him to be frank more.
At the party
Everyone is in a good mood, relaxed, you can dance together or take part in a game, it won’t be difficult to be nearby.
There are too many people to have a normal conversation.
Solution:
- smile, catch your eye;
- being nearby during a slow dance;
- “accidentally” collide during a dance, game, etc.
Read How to hint to a guy about sex without losing your feminine dignity
If you see that you have attracted the attention of a man, try to move away from everyone so that he can see it: perhaps he will come up to talk.
At school
common interests, events;
meetings in the corridor, office, dining room;
mutual friends who can invite you to the company.
if you are not from the same class, you may rarely encounter each other;
just because you exchange glances, an acquaintance will not be established.
Solution:
- get into the same microgroup with him, for example, a section or an event, where you can greet each other and start a conversation;
- go to a general party, try to be closer, observe, or you can come up and talk.
What to talk about? Usually, if people are on the same page, the conversation will work out. The conversation may turn out better than you expect, and vice versa, and that's natural!
It is better to encourage him to talk about himself. Or start with humor. Men's attention is usually occupied by cheerful girls who laugh wildly at their jokes. Or you can just smile and say: “I think I’ve seen you somewhere before.”
If the meeting didn’t work out in the end, that’s okay! You found out that your conversation is not going well. Then what would the relationship be like?
At work
see each other often;
general topics for communication;
there are situations where you will do work together;
most likely you know his status and something about his character.
ban on office romances;
in case of separation, you will still have to see each other;
you will attract the attention, if not of the man you have chosen, then certainly of several colleagues who will begin to gossip and make up tall tales.
Solution:
- working together is a reason to praise, pay attention, emphasize its importance at work, attract a man to help;
- you can offer to drink coffee with a pie that you prepared yourself;
- invite to your birthday; sit next to you at a corporate party.
We recommend reading:
What kind of women do men like? How to understand that a guy likes you.
What words should you say to a man to make him fall in love with you?
You are a part of my life
Words in the form: “You created heaven on earth for me. You are my angel,” will warm and melt the heart of any man. They come as a balm to the soul, like some kind of unobtrusive compliment.
You are a real man
It is very important for men to hear, understand and feel like a real man, a courageous man. And the more you emphasize this when talking to him, the more he will admire and appreciate you.
The main thing is to be able to do this unobtrusively and beautifully, and then he will be entirely yours.
You are amazing.
“Every time you give me little surprises, I think how awesome you are. With you, every day is unpredictable and amazing."
Many men, like many women, also “love with their ears.” And when they hear such words from a woman who is significant to them, they are filled with pride not only for themselves, but also for their soul mate, who is always on his side, who understands him and cares about him, and with whom it is interesting to talk.
Praise is great power!
I feel safe with you
Men dream of being a hero since childhood. Growing up, many understand that the world is not so easy to save. But you can give your man a chance, feel like a superman, feel your strength, and maybe even fulfill some of his dreams. He will be pleased to know that he is your hero.
Only with you I understood what love is
This is a significant phrase, but should be pronounced with caution. It’s best to say it when your man has already confessed his love to you, because most men don’t like it when women force their feelings on them.
Wait for more or less the right moment to say such meaningful words.
I couldn't do this alone
It doesn’t matter what your man did: peeled potatoes, fixed a faucet, nailed a nail, it’s important that you noticed it. He will continue to take care of you only because you are grateful and appreciate him.
Common mistakes girls make
All men are different, and so are their preferences. However, there are typical dissatisfaction with certain traits and actions of women. To avoid mistakes when communicating, it is better to find out about them right away.
- Untidy. A shaggy girl in wrinkled clothes is not the heroine of the fairy tale about the goose at the well. This is reality: we sometimes look like this when we relax, in front of a man. And this should not be allowed: neither at the beginning of a relationship, nor after a few years. You won't like it if he's overgrown and wearing a battered, unwashed jacket?
- Rude and unfeminine. There is hardly a guy who will sincerely say: “I really dream of marrying a girl who endlessly swears, smokes like a steam locomotive, and sends me to hell!” Well, everyone is attracted to feminine traits: sensitivity, caring, kindness, beauty.
- Disrespect for men. If you don’t hide your distrust of the male sex, call men offensive words, snort at the sight of a happy couple, or sneer at a story about a good husband, then you will cause the same negativity in guys.
- Assertiveness. Courage and activity do not always equal assertiveness and perseverance. Show interest, show concern, but do not insist if there is no proper answer - this is the logical solution.
Perhaps these are the main characteristics of girls that repel men. The rest is a matter of taste.
FAQ
How to attract the attention of a shy guy?
If your choice fell on a modest, indecisive young man, do not rush to be upset. A guy with such a character has advantages: he will listen to you, will not try to suppress you in any way, and, most likely, he needs a female leader.
But no man will like a Pirate in a skirt! Show interest, offer to chat, ask for help with programs on the Internet or choose sports equipment, depending on your interests. Don't call too often, don't bombard with messages!
Just show interest. And then be a nice and grateful listener. If he’s silent, try thanking or praising him for something, and then agree to go jogging in the morning or go to a concert. Again he remains silent and does not agree - this is no longer due to modesty.
What should I do if a guy doesn't pay attention to me?
Let’s imagine that He simply doesn’t know you yet, and therefore has no interest. Your goal: it’s not easy to attract a man’s attention, but also to start communication. What's the point if he just looks at you? This may not end well.
Don't look for the perfect dating option, because it simply doesn't exist. Be yourself. Show ease in communication, but not frivolity or frivolity.
You can smile at him and wait for a reaction. Or you can come up and ask something minor. If you know someone, ask for advice or help. But don’t put your future with him at the forefront!
Let him see what you like, but you have a lot of interesting things in life that you could share!
What if he doesn't like me?
What if you open up to him, tell him about your sympathy, and he refuses, what then? It will be unpleasant, offensive - this is natural. But it will pass! The fact that he refused you means one thing: you both are not suitable for each other! Both! Not only you - him. It’s good that you decided on this issue and didn’t spend months or years dreaming. You acted like a brave girl, found out what was important to you, and got an answer.
A normal person will not laugh, he will feel embarrassed because of the refusal, and many guys try to solve the issue by avoiding it.
If there is a hint of “no” in his actions, is it worth insisting only out of principle and pride, and then living, nervously, does he need you?
The main thing is that you are left with yourself! This is difficult to perceive immediately after a failed relationship, but after a month the truth of these words will become clear to you.
The guy paid attention to me, but does not take the first step: what should I do?
If you are sure that he likes you, but he does not take the initiative, there are two options: in fact, he is more indifferent than you thought or does not yet know how to approach. You can give him signs of your sympathy: look, smile, speak well of him in front of mutual friends. Or you can go all-in. Take the first step, any one, but only one.
If you really doubt it, do the second one. A step means calling or offering to go for a walk, invite to a party, or “chat” on social networks. And that's it, wait!
If he ignores, answers evasively, rarely, stop. It turns out that his interest is very sluggish. And you deserve bright emotions, love, a real man! And you will meet him if you want!
When to stop
Have you successfully applied all the described techniques in practice, but still failed to captivate a man? There are only two options:
- either you didn't try hard enough,
- or you are not his type.
It's not just about appearance, but also behavior, character and much more. Perhaps you initially misjudged his preferences and focused on the wrong things. What to do if you can’t conquer your beloved man?
Reveal your personality from a completely different side, let the man see how multifaceted and original you are. Dramatic changes in appearance and behavior will also help to attract his attention again and give impetus to the beginning of a relationship. If this doesn’t help, then register on the Badoo dating site and start communicating with interesting men.
If you find a girl, or even more so a wife, stop! You can be the best of all the women he has met in his life. But respect yourself.
How to take the first step yourself
To take the initiative, sometimes all it takes is, as we have already discussed, a smile and an exchange of glances. But men tend to doubt or not notice something.
Read What kind of women do men like?
In general, they are straightforward people, for the most part. Therefore, you can offer to take a walk or give him your phone number (easier - a link to your social network account).
We remember the main rule of female initiative: we do not run too far ahead, we do not take more than 2 steps towards without a response from him.
Be an interesting conversationalist
Becoming a good speaker and listener rolled into one is not an easy task, but it can be done. To solve the first half of it, it is important:
- get rid of specific (dialect) pronunciation and colorful accent;
- know the rules of pronunciation of some “tricky” words (pamper, agreement, means);
- do not use “parasitic” phrases (“really,” “somehow,” “honestly”) and emotionally charged “word substitutes” (“damn,” “hat,” “beard”);
- construct logically complete sentences;
- avoid excessive gestures;
- do not add decibels during a conversation;
- replenish memory volumes with useful information;
- make appropriate and witty jokes;
- do not get carried away with criticism and condemnation;
- demonstrate a positive attitude.
To implement the second half of the task, it is recommended:
Showcase your similarities
To get a guy to fall in love, talk more often about how much you have in common with him.
According to statistics, most people form a couple when they have similar views on life and hobbies. If you like going to the gym, be sure to let us know.
If he has rebellious tendencies, you can show yourself in all your glory. If he is a family man by nature, share your plans and vision of family life.
Such points of contact with a partner are very important, but in no case should you lie just to be liked.
Expressing compliments
A man does not hear compliments addressed to him as often as a woman. For this reason, when he hears him being praised, that he was liked and is somehow better than other men, he begins to rejoice.
But there is one nuance in this rule: if you praise too often or give compliments that do not correspond to reality, this method loses its power.
It is better to give compliments to the point, and it will be enough to note his positive qualities or actions once a day.
Strengthening interest10
Try to demonstrate your strengths. While in company, you can show off your singing or musical talents. But only if they really exist. In general, find your strengths and show them.
An excellent technique would be to ask for help. This will allow the man to feel his strength. He will also like that they showed trust in him. In such a situation, it is necessary to show that the man’s opinion is almost an expert one. He will be flattered that a woman thinks that his hands are growing out of place.
It’s worth trying to feed the man, treat him with something. Nowadays, women have completely forgotten to use their culinary skills, but this is the shortest way to a man’s heart.
Remind yourself. Of course, there is no point in calling or writing specifically and directly. But randomly sending him a message, further apologizing for the concern, would be a good technique. In the message, it is better to tell some funny incident that will make him smile.
Keep it a mystery. You shouldn’t immediately dump the story of your whole life on the unfortunate person. You need to open up slowly.
In pursuit of a man’s interest, one must take into account, first of all, the peculiarities of his psychology.
There are a number of points that will repel a man for sure:
- excessive intrusiveness and vulgarity;
- casual or specific mention of previous relationship experience;
- listing your problems and difficulties;
- oddly enough, excessive stiffness and shyness;
- assertiveness of speech and obscene words;
- questions about his material well-being and sources of income;
- lack of interest in his personality, talking only about his beloved self.
This is just generalized data about male opinion. Every man is individual. After all, what one likes will be disgusting to another. A quote from Jean de Labruere will come in handy: “Everyone has their own idea of female attractiveness; beauty is something more immutable and independent of tastes and judgments.”
Making time for your own life
If a girl is passionate about her life and is engaged in self-development, she looks more attractive and desirable in the eyes of a man.
If you are in eternal stagnation and do not develop, then over time a man will get bored of spending time with you and his feelings will fade away.
Don't waste your time trying to win over your partner. We always need time for ourselves and our own hobbies, which make us happier.
If you don’t know what to do, remember your childhood dreams and start making them come true.
Positive6
A smile and a positive attitude are one of the main criteria for attracting a man’s attention. Frowning eyebrows and complaints about life and others will quickly push a man away. Also, you should not judge other people in front of him; for him, this will be an indicator of bitterness and failure.
In addition, goodwill is very rare these days, so it will definitely arouse the interest of the stronger sex.
Strict control of your appearance
It’s not without reason that people say that you meet someone by their clothes. This is indeed true. And if you constantly appear in front of your chosen one with an unwashed hair, stale breath and dirty, unwashed clothes, it will be almost impossible to win his sympathy. Moreover, even if a guy is in love and feels sincere sympathy, an unkempt appearance will sooner or later kill all positive emotions, leaving behind only disappointment, and possibly disgust.
You should not spare yourself either money or time. With regular care, a very small amount will be enough. Dress for a date as if you are going to be casting at the best modeling agency in the country. Hairstyle, makeup, manicure - everything should be at the highest level.
The fashion industry can help lovely ladies in many ways. Its many secrets will help you visually correct your figure and hide possible flaws if it is not ideal. For example, high-heeled shoes will make a woman slimmer and “stretch” her silhouette.
Every woman who really evaluates herself really knows both the advantages and disadvantages of her figure. It is quite natural that the existing advantages should be emphasized as much as possible. There are many recommendations from stylists for this:
- Beautiful legs will look more advantageous in short skirts and dresses;
- A wasp waist will be further emphasized by dresses with wide belts or tunics narrowed at the waist;
- The impressive breasts will not go unnoticed in a blouse with a not very large neckline, however, just like the graceful lines of the neck.
Request for help
According to ongoing research, it turned out that we often begin to be attracted to people who have received some kind of help, even if they were previously treated with indifference or hatred.
The human subconscious is responsible for such a state, which believes that these people would commit a similar act against us. When we do something nice to a person we don’t like, conflicting thoughts begin to appear in our brain that the actions taking place do not correspond to the possible acceptable actions towards this person. The brain begins to think, why did he do this?
To achieve peace of mind, he begins to convince us that this person is not as bad as previously thought. In this regard, we can attract the attention of a boy, guy or man by asking him to help us.
Secret techniques and strategies to win his heart
In this section, I will share with you tricks and tricks that you can use to make a man like you so much that he will fall madly in love with you.
Mirroring
A classic technique from the arsenal of neuro-linguistic programming, you can read about it in detail in the book “The Complete NLP Course” by Michael Hall and Bob Bodenhamer. When communicating with a man, try to unobtrusively copy his movements and gestures: he crossed his arms on his chest, and you do so, he crossed his legs - repeat after him.
It shouldn’t look pretentious and cutesy; the guy shouldn’t suspect a trick at all. This way you will establish a connection with the person, and he will subconsciously be drawn to you.
Playing in contrast
This psychological technique is often used by pick-up artists; it is called “closer-further” or “fire-frost”. With its help, you can increase the sympathy of the man with whom you are in a relationship, but their dynamics are too sluggish. The essence of the technique is that you first need to arrange a simply stunning evening for your lover, drive him crazy with your passion, and then distance yourself or completely disappear for a while.
After such a love shake-up, the man will want to repeat it and will expect new steps from you, but you will not live up to his expectations and will make you rack your brain over this riddle. At a distance, constant thoughts about you and pleasant memories will make his attraction even stronger, and by the next meeting he will already be pretty much in love.
Only your distance should not look like an insult. Refer to the problem at work - this is the most plausible excuse.
Atypical behavior
Contradictions and mysteries attract attention and help make a man think about you. Most people in typical situations behave the same way - when they are hurt, they snap back, when they scold them, they make excuses, when they abandon them, they throw themselves at their feet in an attempt to hold on to their loved one. These reactions are built into the psyche, like reflexes; the subconscious mind produces them instantly in response to a specific situation.
Start acting consciously against your first impulse. First process the information, draw conclusions, and then only react. Give only those reactions that are beneficial to you.
For example, if a man clearly sees your sympathy and sends you an SMS with an invitation to his home in the hope of easy sex, remain silent in response. Most girls in this situation will either agree or start a song about how they are “not like that.” Your silence against their background will intrigue and excite your imagination.
