Nature arranges it in such a way that people of the opposite sex are attracted to each other. And the purpose of such attractions is the same - to continue one’s race through sex. Fortunately for girls, a man’s sexual attraction to a woman is expressed by a non-verbal reaction, which is easily decipherable among representatives of the stronger sex.
The peculiarity of the human body is the habit of signaling its needs to the entire area. It doesn’t matter whether others want to know about it or not. I want to eat - a person’s stomach growls, I want to sleep - involuntary yawns, I want sex - a huge number of hidden body signals.
All these signals are embedded in the human genetic code, which, as evolution progresses, acquires its own characteristics and differences. Perhaps in a few centuries the signals will change, and people will begin to behave differently when meeting an attractive representative of the opposite sex.
Nuances of behavior
Dilated pupils, a frank smile, wandering hands over clothes are typical subconscious signs of sympathy that can be observed in any guy when he sees a girl he likes. If you dig a little deeper, these subconscious actions are a hidden cry that the female sitting opposite is suitable for this male to mate with. This is if it's rude.
In fact, the body's chemistry is added to the subconscious reaction and creates a real picture, which is called falling in love.
Trying to discover something new
Most people are driven to various experiments in their sexual life by curiosity. For example, some use escort services (phone sex, ordering “priestesses of love”) or resort to communicating with representatives of a different race. So what is the difference between the relationships between women, the love that arises between them?
All this is the same experiment, a unique way to diversify personal life, which uncomplicated, free-thinking individuals decide to undertake, while being fully aware of their actions and deeds. Some representatives of the fair sex try in this way to feel what exactly a man experiences when touching a woman, caring for her and enjoying intimacy with her.
Who needs them2
Full-fledged courtship takes a lot of time and resources. And in the conditions in which our primitive ancestors lived (survival of the fittest), detailed energy expenditure could turn out to be a deadly investment. I overdid it with signs of attention - I didn’t have enough strength to escape from a wild mammoth or tiger.
If he couldn’t convince a pretty lady of his qualities, he was left without the possibility of procreation. Therefore, the body uses non-verbal messages to indicate the sexual attraction of the sexes to each other. Evolution, nothing more.
Dissatisfaction
The lack of sex life, as well as dissatisfaction with it, can provoke same-sex love: 2 women will be united by the desire to receive as many positive emotions as possible from intercourse. Recently, many different articles have appeared that say that ladies know better what they themselves need, therefore the love of a woman for a woman can only bring positivity and a positive energy charge.
Dissatisfaction can be provoked by male egoism, the desire to please himself more than his partner. Therefore, the female subconscious erects a kind of wall in front of relationships with representatives of the stronger sex, which forces the individual to radically change his sexual orientation.
Why are they not clear to everyone?3
Why would nature create a subconscious reaction if it is incomprehensible to those for whom it is intended? Nature should not be considered stupid; it will not create a useless mechanism. Another thing is that the individual character traits of each person interfere with this mechanism. Accordingly, not all males demonstrate hidden messages in the same way:
- The guy's current hormonal balance. A young man, in the absence of regular sex, will use every opportunity to demonstrate his intentions.
- Features of age. In youth, such messages are not noticed, in youth they are incorrectly interpreted... and in old age they are perfectly understood, but the body is not always able to carry out its plans.
- Character traits. Some people subconsciously feel sexual desire from their interlocutor. Others cannot boast of this. In such situations, only life experience will help.
Woman with girl: love and sex. Attitude of men
This reason is in many ways similar to the previous one. The only difference is that, according to the theory of sexologist John Money, you always keep in your heart the image of someone who left a significant mark on your life. And after that you will always be drawn to certain people.
The standard could be:
- A person you know is your first love, a teacher
- Your idol is a musician, actor
- And even a fictional image - the hero of a film or literary work
This factor includes both emotional and physical violence, as well as misunderstanding on the part of a person’s environment, child and teenage cruelty. Family is the main social factor influencing personal development. A negative attitude towards a girl in childhood, abuse from the father, his betrayal or sexual violence - all this in the future affects the preferences of an adult in terms of sexual orientation.
A woman’s love for a woman can develop not only thanks to “ghosts” from childhood and psychological trauma received during this period. The first negative sexual experience with a man, ridicule and bullying from peers of the opposite sex leave an unfillable hole in a woman’s psyche.
Psychologists believe that the love of two women, based on psychological trauma and fears received at any stage of human development, does not bring positive emotions; it is a psychological problem that requires correction, and in some cases, treatment.
Sexual attraction does not guarantee sex4
Hidden messages have a wider range of functions than meets the eye. Otherwise, it would be a simple invitation to bed games for the first person of the opposite sex. All nonverbal signs can be divided into three subgroups. Moreover, the first two categories cannot be perceived as an invitation to create a couple. They are needed to slightly indicate their intentions, and in case of reciprocity, move on to the third subgroup:
- Signals of the first category - demonstrate to a pretty lady that a guy has noticed her. The young man sucked in his stomach, the girl straightened her hair, etc. The task of such signs is to hold the attention of the opposite sex on themselves. Often there is no intention behind this.
- Signals of the second category demonstrate an attempt to distinguish the carrier from other competitors. The task is simple - to show your attractiveness as a possible partner.
- Signals of the third category demonstrate clear intentions to move from words to action. These are the most challenging signs (attempt to hug, tactile contact, etc.).
Propaganda
What has been broadcast recently on TV, as well as in various online communities, is nothing more than indirect propaganda of lesbian relationships. Show business celebrities openly demonstrate their sexual orientation, showing how fashionable and modern it is, and in some countries rallies of LGBT activists are held.
Provocations of this kind have no effect on the seasoned minds of mature, established individuals. Mostly young girls and teenagers with fragile psyches fall under the influence of propaganda. Then a woman’s love for another woman develops under the influence of external suggestion, and it is dominated to a greater extent by playing for the public.
First category5
As soon as a young man notices any pretty girl, his back straightens and his stomach tightens. He tries to appear more massive and stronger.
The guy tries to turn his body towards the person who has attracted attention. Here it is appropriate to remember the stunning beauties whom men see off with a turn of their heads. If the situation does not allow you to turn your body or head, at least one of the gentleman’s feet will be directed towards the girl.
Examine your appearance, blow off the non-existent dust from your shoulders, straighten the collar of your T-shirt. The future winner must shine with his appearance (so his instincts say).
Religion
Almost all official world religions consider homosexuality a sin. Despite the loyalty of modern society in Western countries towards LGBT people, most Christian and Catholic churches, as well as Islam, do not accept individuals who openly declare their sexual preferences in favor of people of the same sex.
However, recently in some Catholic churches and communities there has been a tendency to accept homosexuality as such and openly support sexual minorities.
Second category6
An attempt to reduce the distance - a desire to distinguish one’s majesty from the crowd of other men. There can be absolutely any reason to approach the beauty. If a person does not suffer from tightness, he will not only approach, but will also attract attention.
Many animals lure females with serenades during the mating season. In a man, the timbre changes, notes of hoarseness may appear. They laugh loudly even at banal jokes.
A man's sexual attraction to a woman is also manifested in the position of a suitor. They are either maximally relaxed, or, conversely, optimally stable. If a young man, when communicating with a lady, takes a stable position, or moves from his usual pose to an imposing one, this is a good sign.
And of course, such a frequent hidden sexual signal as a gaze. A possible partner tries to draw all the girl’s attention to himself and look into her eyes. Based on the response, conclusions will be drawn about sympathy
Reasons for decreased libido
The libido of men and the libido of women by : poor health, negative mood, body fatigue, psychological discomfort. Sexual desire decreases in the fall, when leaving work, or with heavy workload. A decrease in sexual desire occurs in a variety of somatic diseases, such as coronary heart disease, chronic gastritis, hepatosis, bronchitis, pneumonia, pyelonephritis, neurosis, somatoform dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system , astheno-neurotic conditions, increased nervousness, depressive neurosis, depression, chronic stress, renal failure, long working hours, problems with an intimate sexual partner ( sexual problems , problems during sex, problems of a sexual nature ). Various medications have a negative effect on male and female libido, drugs - antidepressants, tranquilizers, antipsychotics, hormonal drugs, sedatives, sleeping pills, drugs to lower blood pressure (BP).
Third category7
A man who begins to repeat the beauty’s gestures directly hints at open desires. If you ask him why he is portraying a mirror, the answer will be silence - after all, he himself does not understand where the urge to repeat the movement of his interlocutor comes from. The same applies to the manner of conversation; with mutual sympathy, both partners try to copy each other.
At hidden signals from the third subgroup, the guys begin to “let go.” The bravest ones will try to put their hand on your waist while walking, the more modest ones will take your hand, and the most insecure ones will try to at least touch. If the boyfriend fails, he will touch other objects.
These are just a few of the many nonverbal signs that demonstrate a person's true intentions.
What is the right thing to do if you have an irresistible attraction to a person?
Before choosing one or another tactic of behavior, you need to determine what kind of attraction you are experiencing. In fact, this feeling does not always involve romantic or sexual overtones. Conventionally, attraction is divided into 4 types.
- Physical attraction. This is precisely the attraction that is based on sensuality and sexuality. In this case, it is physical contact that is important: you want to touch the object of your passion, hug him, kiss him and, of course, have sex. You will learn more about this type of attraction in David Bass’s wonderful book “The Evolution of Sexual Attraction. Strategies for finding partners”
- Romantic attraction. It would seem that it is not much different from the previous one. But in fact the differences are significant. When you experience romantic attraction, physical contact fades into the background. You enjoy dating and communicating with the person you like. You want to be near him, hold hands, talk, look into his eyes. Of course, sex can also be present in this case, but it is not the goal of the relationship, but rather a pleasant addition to it.
- Platonic attraction. This type of attraction can be observed both between a man and a woman, and between people of the same sex. In this case, we are not talking about sexual desire. The main sign of platonic attraction is the desire to be close to a person, communicate with him, and share emotions. Very often, platonic attraction develops into a long, strong friendship.
- Aesthetic attraction. He is also characterized by a lack of sensuality. Most often, this attraction is experienced towards celebrities. In this case, a person enjoys the charisma, appearance, style and manners of a famous person. However, sometimes the same feeling can be caused by the people you meet in everyday life. For example, you may be captivated by the Hollywood smile of a new employee, you will secretly admire the white-toothed handsome guy, but at the same time you will not have the desire to go on a date or have sex with him.
We've sorted out the types of attraction. But what if you suddenly felt this feeling?
First of all, listen to yourself and figure out what type of attraction you are experiencing. If this is an aesthetic or platonic attraction, there is no need to resist the emotional impulse. You can admire the person you like as much as you like or communicate with someone in whom you see a kindred spirit - there is nothing wrong with that.
If your feelings are romantic or sexual in nature, you need to be careful here. First, think about what consequences await you if you do give in to temptation. Those who are not currently in a relationship have nothing to fear. You can take a risk - pleasant emotions from a romantic adventure are guaranteed. Further events will develop according to one of the scenarios:
- Falling in love will develop into a deeper feeling and your relationship will move to a new, serious level.
- Or gradually the romantic flair will dissipate and ardent love will cool down and disappear on its own
Unfortunately, attraction sometimes comes to those who are already bound by an oath of fidelity to a permanent partner. Sometimes the desire becomes so strong that it literally blinds a person and pushes him to act recklessly. If you understand that it is becoming more and more difficult to resist the surging feeling and the attraction is becoming irresistible, think - is it worth risking your current relationship because of this?
Even if it seems to you that this is love at first sight and forever, that your beloved was sent to you by fate and is the embodiment of an ideal, do not rush to rush into the pool of passions. Now you are blinded by hormones that do not allow you to adequately assess the person and the whole situation as a whole. Over time, the hormonal storm will subside and it may turn out that your chosen one is not at all the same as you saw him. So was it worth risking the current stable relationship for this?
Therefore, before you commit a reckless act, try to get to know the person as well as possible. Now you are attracted to his image, often created by your imagination and little corresponding to reality. How to get rid of unwanted attraction? Just give your desires a break. As you know, the peak of love passes in a few weeks, maximum - two to three months.
In most cases, this period is enough for the raging hormones to calm down and stop clouding the mind. If, even after a while, your feeling has not weakened one bit and you are attracted to your new chosen one with the same force, perhaps there is something more between you than a hormonal explosion.
Is your attraction mutual? In this case, you can try to communicate closer and get to know the person better - what if he really is “the one” with whom you are destined to live happily ever after?
Now you know that there are different types of attraction. In some cases it is completely harmless, but sometimes it can cause serious changes in your life. Have you ever experienced an inexplicable attraction to another person? How did you deal with such a situation? Tell us about your experience in the comments.
Elena Zenkova06/23/2018 Category: Relationships Loading… Back
Direct intentions8
Nature is nature, but you should not rely only on hidden signals of the subconscious. A modern young man, in addition to non-verbal messages, will definitely use more direct ways to indicate his intentions:
- There is a desire to protect the object of your dreams. It manifests itself in attempts to shelter the beauty from bad weather with an umbrella, to move forward in a dark alley, to help with solving difficulties.
- The man expresses compliments, tries to treat the lady with a cup of something, and gives gifts.
- He jokes a lot, tries to entertain and make his interlocutor laugh.
- Sensually reacts to female touches, be it simple hugs or kisses.
- Eventually, there will be direct invitations to retire.
Alcohol
There are many anecdotes and comical stories about how a man and a woman, having too much alcohol, end up in the same bed the next morning. Who said this couldn't happen between two ladies? For example, women met to share personal problems, sat in a bar, drank a fair amount and “fucked” a couple of obsessive, sleazy gentlemen.
Then they smoothly moved to the apartment of one of their friends and went to sleep on the same bed. This was followed by innocent hugs, then kisses and so on. In the morning, both ladies will be confused and feel a sense of shame, since this has never happened to them before. The love of 2 women at this stage will most likely end, and both partners will never cross paths again.
Features of male desire9
Not only the stronger sex is attracted to women. The latter also tend to experience sexual desire. But guys have some differences:
- Testosterone is present in all people's bodies. But its concentration in the male body is much higher than in women. Simply put, the male half of the population has higher sexuality.
- The peak need for sex is observed in boys under 25 years of age. After the third decade, this need decreases. In girls, it is maximally intensified by this age.
- Attraction on a physical level manifests itself in guys even before they meet. It is enough for them to evaluate the girl’s appearance in order to decide to get to know each other better.
- Psycho-emotional mood does not greatly affect a man’s sexual desire. Bed games act as a kind of relaxation, minimizing stress and overexertion.
- Guys can desire many beauties at once. But real desire is activated simultaneously with feelings for a person.
If a representative of the fair half of the population knows how to perceive non-verbal messages, she can build further acquaintance in the most convenient way for herself.
Voluptuous sensations
The second need is pleasure from sexual intercourse and ejaculation; after ejaculation, the concentration of hormones decreases and libido weakens for a while. (Also, do not forget about the anticipation of intercourse, when a man experiences voluptuous sensations, which may be accompanied by increased temperature, trembling, redness of the skin, etc.) Many men perform sexual intercourse solely to obtain pleasant sensations, in order to strengthen and reinforce the moral component, sometimes they organize role-playing games , small erotic performances to create certain situations that will excite partners more than before. There are special products that help sexual intercourse bring more strong and positive sensations; various aphrodisiacs and stimulants are also produced, the use of which is recommended only as prescribed by a doctor.
