If a girl answers but doesn’t write first, there are reasons for this. More details about them are written in this article.
Youth is a time of dating, love and starting new relationships with members of the opposite sex. However, guys often come across a common problem in communicating with girls, which is expressed in the inability and inability to determine and understand the intentions of the person they like.
Read another article on our website on the topic: “VK games with a girl by correspondence, in messages, in chat . You will find entertainment for two, for several people, as well as the VK emoticons game with answers for a girl.
For what reasons does a girl not write to a guy first? Why doesn't she answer right away? Find answers to these and other questions in this article. Read on.
Should a guy text a girl first?
The guy writes to the girl first.
The stereotype that a man should be the initiator in everything has been strengthened in our minds. And communication was no exception to this rule. It’s really better for the guy to write a couple of lines first, because his silence may be a sign of reluctance to communicate.
Even in the last century, the initiative of communication coming from a lady was considered wrong. According to people of that time, only women with a frivolous nature acted this way. Representatives of the fairer sex are accustomed to expecting the first step from their chosen one or the young man they like. Should a guy text a girl first?
It is worth highlighting a couple of situations in which it is important for a man to take the initiative. These include:
- Just getting to know each other. How not to write to a lady after you've met? The man will not be able to stand it and will definitely take the first step.
- Time after the last date. Girls usually wait for either a call, a message, or continued communication. This will tell them that the meeting went well and the guy's expectations were justified. And, conversely, silence will clearly illustrate that he is not interested in the girl, and she does not captivate his thoughts.
An important factor is the exchange of phone numbers, and even better, when the girl herself gives the gentleman her own number. This can be interpreted by the guy as a sign of her desire to continue communication.
3) Apologizes
In general, it is quite difficult for men to admit that they are wrong. If a guy turns out to be wrong in some situation, then sometimes it’s easier for him to write about it via messages than to say such words out loud. This should not be taken as a personal insult; there is no need to demand that he certainly repeat these words when we meet. If a man apologized, even in writing, then this speaks of his integrity. This shows that a man is not indifferent to the condition of his beloved, her feelings and he knows how to admit that he is wrong, and also values his partner and does not want to lose her.
Should a girl pee first?
The initiative can also come from a girl. However, we should not forget that representatives of the fair sex are very shy people by nature. It’s easier for them to expect activity from a man. And women actively take advantage of this. However, as soon as a woman writes first, the guy will certainly regard this as a sign of courage, which will definitely interest him. The further development of the situation will be easier for both participants in the communication, and even the most modest young man will not hesitate to invite his passion to go on a date with him.
2) Interested in opinions
When a guy periodically asks questions in messages and asks for the opinion of his significant other, he shows that it is important for him to know his beloved’s thoughts on a particular topic. The best thing a girl can do in this situation is to answer questions sincerely, do not hesitate to express her own point of view, enter into a dialogue, possibly an argument, it is important to maintain the interest of her loved one. And, of course, don’t forget to also ask questions in response to show your interest in the man’s opinion.
Why doesn’t the girl write first, why does she rarely write?
For what reasons does the girl not take the initiative to communicate? Why doesn't she call or text first? This happens often, in many couples. The situation in which a girl does not write first or rarely writes is quite common. There can be many reasons for this - from a basic lack of desire to communicate, to fear on her part of looking like an intrusive person in the eyes of a guy. The most common cases when a girl stops communicating are:
- Lack of time to communicate on the Internet. Indeed, besides the Internet, there is also real life, in which she may have responsibilities and her own affairs. This includes visiting a university, work, friends and many other personal things.
- Thinking about rules and behavior within the framework of a stereotype. Perhaps she believes that the guy should be the initiator of communication, and he should suggest topics for conversation.
- Fear of being unclaimed by a guy. By not writing to the young man first, the girl believes that this way she will show her demand among representatives of the opposite sex. Some of the ladies prefer that a man experience some kind of competition in the first stages of dating and communication.
- To attract attention. By not answering calls and texts, a woman may deliberately want to arouse concern in a guy, coupled with interest in her personality.
- Lack of interest in the guy. This option is quite real. A guy may suffer from embarrassment to write a couple of lines to his passion, but the lady doesn’t even think or remember about him. She doesn't want to either write or read messages from him.
- The desire to end communication under the condition of the strong obsession of the gentleman. A guy’s excessive persistence and desire for frequent communication can scare away a girl.
The last reason may be due to a relatively recent acquaintance. When young people have been communicating for some time, the dialogue initiates itself.
Norms
The fact is that in society there are many different laws, norms and rules. This is in addition to those prescribed by law. In the same way, there is a certain etiquette for dating and the first date as well. The problem is that every person knows that there is such etiquette, there are certain rules of behavior, but he believes that the rules that are known to him are the same for everyone. And this is where the main difficulty lies, because of which people do not coincide. It’s just that these norms of behavior differ very much in different groups of people. And there are a lot of groups, they differ socially, culturally, and historically, they all have different interests and ways of thinking. Some, for example, adopt a European style of behavior, some are patriarchal, some follow others, who are also not homogeneous.
And, remember the main thing - all the rules, all the norms, it’s all relative. If you think it's not suitable for you, then it's not suitable.
In general, it is very easy to mismatch. For example, it is believed that sex on the first date is wrong. But, there are people who after that lived together until the end of their lives. Moreover, anyone who loves such “rules” would be considered a hypocrite.
10 phrases that women can't stand
The girl always answers well, but she doesn’t write first: why, should she write?
The girl always answers well, but does not write first.
For women, strong persistence acts as a deterrent. There can be many reasons for this. Perhaps the young lady does not want to start communication herself, but she will demonstrate active participation in the dialogue, since conversations with the guy arouse genuine interest in her. So, the girl always answers well, but she doesn’t write first. Should I answer her?
The main factors why this happens are:
- Lack of desire to be intrusive . This factor is the most common. Having the strongest feelings for her chosen one, she is simply embarrassed by their manifestations and confessions to the gentleman on this topic. The best thing for a guy to do in a situation like this is to send a message first and start a conversation.
- The desire to demonstrate one's popularity and efficiency . The girl is simply afraid that her desire for communication will be revealed. It is for this reason that she does not write when she is online, trying to show that she is busy communicating with another interlocutor.
- Lack of common topics for communication . A representative of the fair sex simply cannot decide where to start communicating. Sometimes you can see that the young lady seems to be typing a message, but it is not being sent.
- Hidden feelings of jealousy . Often this idea is completely far-fetched. However, this factor should not be excluded. It is enough for a guy to start communicating himself and ask the interlocutor about something - her affairs, mood, and so on. This will be an excellent demonstration of a man’s affection for a girl.
What to do if a girl is often online but doesn’t write? Why does this happen? Read on.
“Closer-Far” technique
The well-known pick-up artist method works like clockwork in seducing all girls.
Moreover, even the beautiful ladies themselves often practice this game on guys. Should you text a girl often? In no case! The meaning is very simple. You need to alternate the fiery spirit of a dragon with the icy heart of an unshakable iceberg.
In fact, this technique was borrowed from cunning women. Agree, you’ve probably already encountered something similar in your life. It seems like we were communicating almost intimately just yesterday, but today you feel a certain wall that she has erected. You write to her joyfully, and she replies: “I’ll answer later” or “I don’t have time now.” And immediately all the joy disappears into oblivion, and the anticipation of the conversation becomes unbearable.
This method needs to be repeated sometimes in a circle, but not too often, so as not to drive the lady into hysterics. But the plus is very significant - when you write after the break, she will be in seventh heaven!
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The girl is often online, writes first, and then doesn’t answer: why?
Girls can be very mysterious. They may be online on social networks, write first, and then do not respond. Why is this happening? There are several reasons for this behavior:
- The young lady uses another account she has set up to communicate . It happens that a girl prefers to communicate through various instant messengers or prefers to chat on the phone.
- Notifications for new incoming messages are not activated . While the gentleman is writing a message, the recipient may be busy listening to music, watching various videos, or reading a news feed.
- The girl's attention is occupied by communication with other interlocutors . Perhaps this is personal correspondence or communication in a group. In such situations, the young lady is simply not able to answer everyone at once.
The guy can only wait or try to write again.
Advice: Try to draw graffiti for her on VK . Your lady will like this, and such a message will not go unnoticed.
Basic topics for online communication
Hobby
Sounds simple enough, right?
Women almost always like to talk about their interests, so ask her some leading questions on this topic.
If you're a little nervous or shy at first to talk about something more serious, then this is the best way to get her to talk.
Just ask her something like:
“ What do you like to do in your free time? " or " What do you do when you're not at work? "
Based on her answers, you can ask a few additional questions to keep the conversation going.
Usually, as a result of such casual correspondence, it turns out that you have something in common.
In fact, that's the whole point of this conversation - to simply find a hobby or interest that you share.
This will help make the conversation more natural and relaxed.
Family
If she has a relatively normal relationship with her parents and there isn't any terrible family drama, then most women will be happy to talk about their family, so it's an easy topic to bring up.
This is not the best topic for communication on the Internet, but it gives an excellent result in terms of rapprochement and establishing trusting relationships.
Just try asking a simple leading question about whether she has any siblings or whether she is close to her parents.
But if you don’t want to take risks, you can always start with some interesting story about yourself and your family.
This may interest her and cause a response; she will want to be frank about her family.
Holidays or vacation
This is exactly the topic that everyone likes to discuss, dream, and plan. People usually respond positively to this kind of conversation.
To start a conversation, you may have to remember a recent vacation that made a strong impression on you.
Just don't write like you're bragging.
For example, if your family once rented a private island in the Caribbean, keep this information to yourself because they may not believe you.
It would be best if your vacation story is short and sweet so you can quickly get to the questions.
Remember, it’s better for her to talk more than you, so move on to memories of her unforgettable vacation as soon as possible.
Favorite food
This is another easy topic to talk about because it's something that everyone loves to chat about.
On top of that, using your favorite food as a bonding activity isn't that hard or scary at all.
If you want to quickly get her to talk about this topic, then ask a non-standard question: “ What will be your last meal before the Apocalypse? "
This is another good way to find something in common between you.
Keep in mind that food can be a powerful aphrodisiac, so choosing the same food over and over again can be a good sign.
Asking a woman about her favorite foods and restaurants is also a good way to gather useful information about her.
If she mentions a specific restaurant or type of food she likes, it gives you an easy transition into asking her out.
Pop culture
Pop culture may be the most important topic of conversation with women.
This is one of the easiest ways to get closer, for example:
“ Have you seen this new film yet? " or " Did you go to the concert yesterday? "
The main thing is to stick to a topic that is familiar to you.
If you don't know anything about art, then don't ask her about it.
If you don't read much, don't mention books.
With these conversations you are also trying to find something in common between you, so if you both love the same movie or TV show, then this will become the basis for a long conversation.
If you want to understand what to chat with a girl about at the very beginning of your acquaintance, then it’s best to find out what her favorite movie, book or something else is and ask her to tell you more about it.
The girl doesn’t write first and doesn’t answer: why did she stop communicating?
The girl does not write to the guy first and does not answer.
Does your correspondence last for a long time? And suddenly the girl simply lost the desire to maintain communication. She doesn't text first and doesn't respond. Why did she stop communicating? As soon as a friend abruptly breaks off contact and avoids communication, the guy should definitely worry.
How can a man interest a woman? How to give a hint of the desire to continue communication and relationships? The solution at first glance is quite simple - search for a contact using all available methods and means:
- Call the phone number
- Send a message via SMS
- Find out from mutual friends where she is and why she is silent
If a guy sees that the messages have been read by a girl, but there is no response to any of them, all attempts to get in touch must be temporarily stopped. When a lady does not want to answer her boyfriend, no one excludes the fact that she is simply tired and wants to rest a little. No need to push. It’s better to hold off on communication and give the girl a break. Let her establish contacts and weigh every word spoken to her.
But there is a more delicate and unpleasant situation for the guy. It may happen that she met someone else and she is not only not indifferent to him, but is very interesting and she is drawn to him. In this case, communication with you was simply out of boredom and a desire to occupy myself with something. If this turns out to be the case, then writing to her is not just a thankless task, but a hopeless one.
1) Everyday messages
Some girls complain that guys don’t show off very interesting messages in SMS correspondence. But even from ordinary everyday correspondence you can extract a lot of useful information. When a man is truly in love, he will want to share with his beloved what is happening to him. He can talk about how the day went, what interesting things he saw, what plans he makes for the evening. And this is not at all useless and boring information, in this way a man dedicates his beloved into his life, shows that she is not indifferent to him.
If a guy was only committed to an intimate relationship and perceived the relationship as a passing hobby or affair, then he would not share his life with a girl.
The girl writes first: what does this mean?
When a representative of the fair sex is active, this is a good sign. This is a clear illustration of a girl’s interest in communicating with a guy. This happens, as a rule, when a young lady falls in love, out of boredom, when she wants to be the “leader” in a couple or when there are no good interlocutors. Or maybe she is already starting to be jealous and is trying to concentrate the guy’s attention exclusively on herself.
A man's reaction to such behavior can be completely different. Some guys get scared by this fact, with the subsequent cessation of communication. For some, such an initiative seems suspicious, while others, on the contrary, are only happy. The guy should treat such a manifestation of friendliness and sympathy on the part of the girl with all respect.
In reality, there may be a great many reasons why a girl does not write to a guy first. The behavior of any individual lady depends on her existing stereotypes and attitudes from the field of psychology. Her activity during the dialogue can tell her interlocutor a lot. And not only to suggest, but also to help him find the right words for a given situation, establish communication and get closer to the passion that interests him.
7) Gives compliments
Men themselves are inherently rather taciturn creatures; it’s rare that a specimen can eloquently tell his beloved how beautiful she looks today. But thanks to messages, many guys find it much easier to compliment their crush on her figure or appearance in writing. So if a guy compliments you, it means he's really crazy about you. You just have to learn how to react correctly to this and respond with gratitude.
General rules
How to correspond with your ex-partner:
- Before you mindlessly use emoticons—fashionable graphic depictions of emotions—think about how they might be interpreted by the recipient. As soon as a relationship loses its former character and stability, an emoticon can “play a cruel joke.” Therefore, during correspondence, it is better not to skimp on words, but to reduce the number of cartoon stickers to a minimum.
- Pay attention to spelling and punctuation of written language. Yes, it is not necessary to painstakingly calculate every comma, but it will be better for you that your ex-partner read exactly what you wanted to say, rather than jumping to hasty conclusions based on his own mood (based on an indistinct string of words).
Maintain a certain pace of correspondence.
Virtual communication should not be too fast and thoughtless, otherwise it can lead to overly intrusive communication. Therefore, it is advisable to conduct the conversation casually, without nervousness and tension, trying to maintain an optimal speed that is convenient for both parties.- Fix a specific information transfer limit. Determine for yourself the optimal volume of messages to maintain parity, appear cultural and tactful. However, you should not overdo it with abbreviations for the sake of the established framework and abuse monosyllabic phrases a la “clear/understandable.” Brevity and conciseness should also be within acceptable limits of reason.
- Choose topics for correspondence wisely. If the interlocutor is minimally interested, do not put pressure or force him to communicate. Be prepared to make several attempts if communication is a must. Ask detailed questions, warm up the dialogue (without provocations!) and carefully monitor the reaction of your other half. In the absence of common ground, it will be difficult to build a dialogue through correspondence.
- Manage the communication process, not only adapting to your interlocutor, but also taking the reins into your own hands, if circumstances and the “degree” of the conversation allow it. Try to catch changes in the communication process in a timely manner so as not to aggravate the situation, but rather to smooth it out.
Can everything change?
If a girl doesn’t answer you, this does not always mean that your communication has come to naught. Things could easily go back to normal in the future. There are a lot of possible scenarios:
- the girl will appear in touch and explain that her ignoring was caused by unforeseen circumstances, after which your communication will resume;
- it turns out that you offended her in some way, but a simple conversation will help return everything to its place;
- the reasons for her ignoring will not be related to you at all and soon she will get in touch;
- It turns out that at first she didn’t like you, but then she will see something special in you, fall in love and begin to initiate communication herself, and so on.
In the end, you can always tell yourself that she is busy, sick, not in the mood, busy with work... There is a reassuring excuse for any situation. But you probably yourself understand that we always have time for those who are important to us. This may not sound very encouraging, but it is better to assess the situation objectively and understand that the girl does not want to communicate with you by correspondence, on time. You deserve an interlocutor who will be as interesting to you as he is to you!