How to politely, harshly, correctly tell a guy off in a public place, in correspondence? How to beautifully blow off a man you once dated? Typical mistakes that prevent you from turning a guy off

If you don't like a man, a guy, and he actively pays attention to you, study our tips that will help you get rid of an obsessive admirer.

What should you do and say when a man whom you consider not particularly interesting and not very attractive wants to meet you on the street? And when a guy also declares his love and demands to move to the next step?

You try hard to avoid meeting him, don’t pick up the phone when he calls, but that’s not enough. What should you do so that he stops communicating with you, but at the same time does not get upset and does not hold a grudge against you?

How to politely refuse a guy in a public place?

Most people are put off by fairly simple phrases:

«I'm not in the mood."
"I have a beloved man".
"I have a child".
"I'm married".

After saying the last phrase, additional questions may follow if you don’t have a wedding ring on your finger, which observant guys will immediately notice. However, having a ring makes everything easier.

Don’t forget about the existence of guys who don’t understand refusal the first time and continue to persistently pursue you and pester you with questions.

Sewing

In this situation, you can dryly and indifferently say that you are in different directions:

«I apologize, but your presence makes me angry."
“My refusal has just made it quite clear to you that any communication with you is unpleasant for me.”.

At the same time, one should not speak rudely, everything should be said in a cultural form, so as not to cause a conflict situation and aggressive actions on the part of the man. Just a dry answer and a stern expression on your face will suffice. In most cases this helps.

But still, there may be individuals who are not affected by your answers and your facial expression, and they stubbornly insist on their own. Such people in most cases are intoxicated. A rude response may provoke them to hit you or insult you.

Let's stay away from the annoying

There are methods that have really been tested and will give the required result:

You should dictate any phone number to him. You should not give him the number of a loved one, a friend, otherwise this will provoke an even greater conflict.
Ask him for his phone number and promise to call him back.
Ask a security guard or police officer for help.
Say you'll scream out loud.

Refuse your ex

It happens that ex-boyfriends want to resume courtship or relationships. They felt sad, remembered wonderful moments, or were simply impatient. As a rule, they return very beautifully - with words of apology, a bouquet of flowers and bright plans for the future. And it was at that moment when you were finally released. If you are firmly convinced of turning off your former gentleman, then there are two options.

Gentle. An original way to refuse a guy who once trampled on your feelings is as follows: “I am very grateful to you for leaving me. Only your action helped me meet a worthy person. I’m sorry, but there’s no place for you in my life anymore.”
Rude. In a distant and cold tone, tell him that he was a worthless lover, and only by comparing did you know the difference. And you will no longer agree to anything less.

A few special methods to give a guy a nice blow

It’s rare that one phrase: “I’m not in the mood” is enough. The easiest way out of this situation is to give a sharp and rude answer. Sometimes this cannot be done due to certain factors. You are in a public place where there are a lot of people or you don’t want to spoil your good mood with such a trifle.

In this situation, it is necessary to give a sharp answer, but remember culture and politeness. One way would be to take the man aside and politely let him know that he should leave you, you cannot be together. The main condition for tact is a smile and a calm tone.

If that's not enough, using some fun and funny refusals will help keep things tactful and turn the guy off.

We use special phrases

Family man. Start talking about your family (fictional or real). You are a mother of two, three, six children, a loving wife whom your husband simply idolizes. And a fan’s persistence can turn into resentment:

“Do you take me for a vicious girl?”
“Do you think that a girl should cheat and not value her family?”

Prudence . Don’t be shy, start talking about money, ask where he works, what position he holds, whether he has his own apartment, what his salary is. Be contemptuous of his answers: “Yes - this is the last century, a two-room Khrushchev house - ugh.” To somehow prove his sympathy to you, ask him to buy a diamond ring.
Talkativeness . Men don't like it when a girl talks too much about anything. When did you go to the cinema with your girlfriend? Talk to a man about the same stupid topics: tights, ridiculous guys, clothes, shopping, cosmetics, your beloved mother. Try your best not to let him say a single word.
Silence. Look away and give simple answers to all questions: “Yes”, “Maybe”, “I don’t know”, “No” . A better method is to forget about its existence. Do not give answers to his questions, pretend that you are talking on the phone and have an important telephone conversation from work. Feeling that he is in a stupid situation, he will leave you alone.

Important conversation

Funny

If you want to blow a guy off with humor, use the following techniques:

Want to get married

This is a risky method, but it works 90% of the time. Tell the guy directly that it’s time to go to the registry office and have more children. You will live as a large family, with your grandmother, mother, father, sisters and brothers in a 2-room apartment. The future husband is obliged to do everything around the house, tenderly kiss his mother-in-law in the mornings and evenings, and take care of his sick grandfather. If the picture turns out bright, the lover will disappear forever.

Hysterical

Throw hysterics, make a scandal for no reason, speak rudely to him, track his appearances online on VK, write nasty things to his friends. A difficult character will be the reason for a sad SMS from a guy saying that you cannot continue communication.

I have a lot of problems, let's solve them

“I need money, a lot of it now, I’ll come to your city, but I won’t be able to work - I’m lazy, at the same time I’ll take my mom and dad, they’re retired anyway. We’re leaving tomorrow, will you meet me?” Most guys respond to such SMS by blocking the girl’s account or completely ignoring her. If he almost agrees, but delays the moment of help, you need to write this: “I need a real man, not a rag. Goodbye!".

I'm pregnant from my ex, now you'll be our dad

Joyfully write a huge text that you met him on time, together you will overcome all difficulties with your baby. Surely the correspondence will end there.

Important! When sending a guy to four directions in a joking manner, do not use ambiguous hints. Delete phrases similar to flirting and emoticons from messages.

Sharp options to give a guy a nice blow

Real life story:

— Can I invite you for a cup of coffee?

- No.

“Where are you going, can I take you?”

“I’m looking for a quiet place for a grave.”

- Why, what happened?

- Yes, I killed my beloved guy, I need to bury him.

Some individuals will not understand even the tenth time. A sharp refusal is the only solution when a person does not understand or begins to be rude and rude to you.

Some don't understand

In order for the answer to sound sharp and harsh and at the same time not provoke a conflict, it is necessary to give the voice sharpness and irritability. You should not use offensive phrases, much less swear.

What can you say to give a nice blow to a man who has fallen in love with you?

A difficult situation is when you realize that your friend loves you. There are two main differences.

First of all, you want your relationship to continue, but to have only friendly notes.
Second, you will continue to see each other if he could not understand your weak and unclear hints. The relationship will not be able to continue, since its end will not come from rejection, but from the fact that you are indifferent to him. The refusal must be clear and precise so that his self-esteem does not suffer.

What to do to make the refusal clear:

Don't delay. At the first signs of sympathy, immediately take action or break off the relationship altogether, or cool your friend’s passion. Taking too long to make a decision can be reassuring to a man. Then it will become even more difficult to refuse him.
Don't flirt with him. Flirting with a man gives him the right to think that you like him, and not that you are just trying to maintain a friendly relationship. If your friend is in love, then in this way you give him hope. Your words of refusal will not give the desired result.
Do not joke. Don't smile, but speak with tenderness and love. Apologize for everything you said so that the person is not offended. You should joke and smile only after a serious conversation and confidence that the guy understood you correctly.

Be categorical
How to refuse gently and politely:

Be alone. Any conversation should start in a comfortable place. This should not be done in a public place, in the company of friends. Just invite him to walk with you in the park. The easiest option is to write him a personal message on social networks.
Courtesy, but specific. Any manifestations of friendly sympathy are excluded, as this will reduce the seriousness of the current situation. Do not apologize. At the same time, any manifestations of sympathy are inappropriate, as you will create the opposite effect.
Celebrate his sincere friendship. Without offending him, let him know that you value his friendship. Know when to stop your praise; a couple of compliments are enough. However, friendship can be fully praised. Remember the problematic situations in which each of you was, and how you helped each other get out of them. How do you communicate well together?

The main thing is to decide which wording “for the main phrase” will be the most correct, so as not to offend him.

Speak tactfully

You should not say phrases that can undermine self-esteem:

"You're not fit to be my man."
“Meeting you undermines my reputation.”
“The best thing I can offer you is friendship.”

Give him a few compliments so as not to break off the relationship completely and remain friends.

How to correctly reject a man in online correspondence or in a message?

The easiest way to refuse correspondence with a man is to put everything in writing in an online message. You won’t waste a lot of time; one phrase will be enough. You won't feel awkward talking face to face. In this case, you should use two refusal strategies.

Delicate but lasting refusal.

Refer to being busy and having two children. After a long time, he will begin to get bored with this and he himself will want to break up. Another course of events is also possible, when he realizes that these are all excuses and starts a serious conversation himself.

A short but tactful refusal.

Another trick is to keep everything short and quick. But do not forget about the culture and politeness of communication:

“I felt comfortable communicating with you, but we are not suitable for each other.”
“Right now my state of mind is not in the mood for a serious relationship.”
"I met another man."
“I realized that we are not a couple.”

The nuances of a competent “lapel”

To begin with, you should clearly understand who we are talking about. In online correspondence, on the street or in a cafe, bar, club, you will behave differently than with an old friend who admitted romantic feelings, but these behavior patterns are united by one feature: politeness, honesty, clarity and specificity.

Yes, a rare girl will refuse flirting, especially if she feels desired, but in this situation flirting is inappropriate. The longer you delay, put off, or flirt with a guy, asserting yourself at his expense, the worse it will turn out for you in the end, so determination and unambiguous wording are important here - even for selfish reasons.

If we are talking about how to beautifully blow off a guy who wants to get acquainted, then it is enough to choose a behavior that is comfortable or natural for yourself and just stick to it. There are many ways to ward off a stranger:

cultural;
funny;
beautiful;
boorish or harsh.

The latter should be resorted to only when other methods have not helped. At the same time, you need to choose the “reject” option based on the specific situation; the main thing is to remain calm and answer politely.

How to beautifully blow off a man you once dated?

The most popular mistake is a sharp and rude refusal. Or, on the contrary, too calm and unsteady. An excellent solution would be to find a middle ground - a calm, cold conversation, indifference and insensitivity.

If you still have sympathy for your ex-man, it will not be easy for you to forget him and break off all relationships. In this case, the best refusal is in correspondence or message.

Gap

Any arguments will help you. This will give weight to the refusal. It's worth mentioning his mistakes as to why you want to keep him. When he tries to make excuses and starts telling you that he will change, tell him that it is too late.
You should not pay attention to personalities and make critical remarks. A conflict may arise and a quarrel cannot be avoided. Come up with a plan in advance for how you will build the conversation.
Do not show nervousness or irritability in your voice. To keep your state of mind calm, do not allow cause and effect to be considered. Everything should be extremely short. We talked specifically - said goodbye and parted.

General rules

Avoid ambiguity. The message should be short, clear and unambiguous.
Do not use obscene language or offensive expressions, especially at the first stage.
Try to blacklist the stalker.
Do not respond to insults and rudeness; ignore such attacks in silence.
Try to approach the situation with a sense of humor.
Don’t rely on the fan’s insight, speak directly, without hints.
Give an objective, compelling reason for refusal to communicate.
Be delicate and restrained.

The main rule is to maintain dignity, pride, inflexibility and restraint. Be on top and do not succumb to provocations from an obsessive admirer.

Typical mistakes that prevent you from turning a guy off

According to experts, women make four traditional mistakes when turning down a guy:

Lack of specificity. Excessive politeness and tact are not the best helpers. They confuse delicacy and compassion for a person with invisible hints. Being direct in your conversation will help you be specific about the kind of relationship you want with him.
The behavior is exactly the opposite. You shouldn’t smile at him and wink a couple of minutes after you’ve turned a guy off. He may feel like you're playing a prank on him. He will take double measures to achieve you. This is a common mistake among friends. In this way, the girls try not to lose their friendship and make amends. One of the ways to maintain a relationship is coquetry.
Slowness. This mistake only applies to postponing a serious conversation. Such thoughts can only save you from the attention of your boyfriend for a while, but then everything will resume with renewed vigor.
Rudeness and humiliation. When answering in this manner, girls make a mistake when the gentleman does not want to understand the first time. You shouldn't ruin your relationship. One day you will need this person to help you resolve some problem. Maybe you will find him attractive in the future? An unpleasant aftertaste will remain and it is unlikely that it will be possible to make amends.

Hard

Now let’s look at the rudest option for refusing a guy’s correspondence. Use it only if the fan does not understand correctly and gently. For a hard refusal, the following tips will be useful:

Try all soft refusal options first. Go to the hard method last.
Do not express yourself too rudely, avoid obvious insults and obscenities.
Forget about politeness and apologies.
Address taboo topics in SMS (sex, appearance, interests, intelligence).
For the stupid, you can repeat it several times. Duplicate SMS, do not enter into discussion or argument.
Do not respond to pleas and flattery. If the guy starts whining and sucking up, repeat the text of the message and finally send him away.
Include imagination and humor. Refusal should spoil the mood not for you, but for the clingy guy.

An example of how to beautifully but harshly send a guy off by correspondence:

It is useful for every girl to know how to politely reject a guy in correspondence. The correct answer to an annoying man will relieve you of unpleasant emotions and the need to insult a fan. But you need to be polite until the guy crosses the boundaries of what is permitted. Then you can turn on your inner tigress and go ahead.