How to develop a strong character: practical tips and tricks

Overcome difficulties

The best way to build character is through difficulties, users of The Question project are sure. “At a minimum, the most obligatory condition is to get out of your comfort zone,” says Dmitry Richter. “As a rule, strong people overcame such barriers and experienced such events that we never even dreamed of.”

“You can never truly taste success if it comes too easily,” confirms Elizabeth Lutes. Also, you should not blame others for your failures and failures, but accept them with your head held high.

What is a strong character

Strong character is a person’s ability to firmly adhere to his principles and beliefs, and to confidently move towards achieving his goals. It should not be confused with stubbornness and pride.

How strong a character is depends on three of its components:

1. The power of principles and beliefs. We can say that this is a person’s attitude towards himself, his life and the future. A good example is the code of honor of an officer or samurai (Bushido).
2. Strength of mind. Consists of three separate parts: faith, devotion and fearlessness. These qualities determine the triumph of the spiritual component of human essence over the material.
3. Strength of will. Represents the ability to fight laziness and self-pity and steadily pursue your goals.

A weak-willed person, unlike a strong one, does not possess the listed qualities. He has no principles or beliefs of his own. Often he does not know what he wants from life, and follows the lead of those around him.

Read books

Users recommend reading books of completely different genres. Autobiographies - to glean the experience of great people, strong in spirit. Fiction - to develop imagination and play out difficult situations that may ever happen to you. And books on self-development - to get motivation and learn useful psychological techniques.

Dmitry Sergeev proposed a list of three main works, in his opinion: Robin Sharma “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari”, Dale Carnegie “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living” and Stephen Covey “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.

Learn to say no

This last tip is indirectly related to the previous one. Having determined your own life values, goals and desires, you must remove from your life everything that does not correspond to them in order to become truly independent from the world around you and the people around you. If someone asks you to do something that is contrary to your personal principles and interests, refusing is not only the best choice possible, but also your sacred duty. There is no need to adapt to those around you. A tough and self-confident person must force those around him to adapt to himself.

Have own opinion

Strong and mature individuals are not afraid to express their opinion, even if it is very different from the generally accepted one. In addition, they adhere to their own views, despite criticism. “In our century, people themselves become slaves to other people’s opinions, so it is very difficult to preserve individuality of thinking. Learn to let go of other people's opinions and form your own objective judgment,” says Elizabeth Lutes.

Dmitry Sergeev advises you to think about what you do in life because you really want it, and what you do under pressure from others or circumstances. “The ability to walk away from a film that you don’t like, and not finish watching it because money was paid for it. Don't eat a dish in a restaurant that you don't really like, and don't choke because you paid a considerable amount for it. During an unpleasant conversation, get up, turn around and leave, or just remain silent at the moment when you just want to “blurt out” something or do something, without thinking that someone will think something “wrong” about you.” , he gives examples.

Good Tips for Developing a Strong Character

There are several ways to become a strong and confident person. The main thing is not to be lazy and not to feel sorry for yourself. The result will not be long in coming.

Ask yourself questions

Man creates reality with his own hands. And this doesn’t only apply to positive aspects. People also create negativity on their own, perhaps even benefiting from it.

An illustrative example will help you understand the above. Let's say someone is unsuccessfully struggling with indecision, weak character and lack of goals. Where did he get these qualities from? Don’t immediately blame external circumstances. Maybe a person just doesn’t want to be successful? He is afraid of being first or standing out from the crowd. In response to these fears, the body forms and develops those character traits that protect against well-being. As a result, a person continues to live in his own comfortable world, without trying to change it.

Taking the above into account, there are three important questions to ask yourself:

1. Why are certain qualities of my character needed?
2. What role do they play in my life?
3. How do these qualities protect you from the outside world?

Honest answers will help you understand what and how you need to change in your character in order for it to become stronger.

Think about whether you really have qualities that interfere with your life

Perhaps there are no such qualities in character, and the opinion about their existence was imposed by parents, friends or acquaintances. For example, a child is told from childhood that his hands grow in the wrong place and he is completely untalented. For the time being, he will think so. But at some point he will understand that in fact everything is not so bad. He can repair any damage or create something with his own hands. It turns out that the shortcoming is far-fetched.

We need to sit down and seriously analyze whether there really are character trait problems? Perhaps these are just figments of the imagination.

Formulate what qualities you want to acquire

You need to clearly indicate your preferences by choosing the most desirable character traits. This could be determination, dedication, self-confidence, etc.

Psychologists recommend talking about qualities in two phrases: I want to receive and I already have these qualities in my character. Thanks to this, the process of their development will go faster.

Remember a famous person who has the right qualities

It doesn't have to be a real person. You can take your favorite character from a book, movie or even a cartoon as an example. The main thing is that he has the character traits a person needs.

You need to imagine yourself in the place of your role model. You should mentally visit those situations where he was, and think about what you could do in his place.

Imagine that you already have the necessary qualities

It is necessary to present not only a strong character, but also the right actions, confident movement towards your goals. You should turn on your imagination at full strength and hold the resulting image in your consciousness for at least a few minutes. It is advisable to repeat the exercise regularly. It will help you get additional energy to fulfill all your dreams.

Overcome difficulties

How to develop character in yourself in this way? Many people know that difficulties strengthen him best. Therefore, you need to leave your comfort zone. This is a must. Only in this case will you be able to find your weak points and change for the better.

It is important to remember that success that comes too easily will never bring a sense of true satisfaction.

read books

It doesn't matter what kind of books they are. Psychologists recommend reading literature of all genres; each of them will teach you something new:

• autobiographies show how strong, world-famous people developed their character;
• works of art contribute to the development of imagination and encourage one to play out possible developments of events in one’s mind;
• Self-help books provide motivation and the opportunity to learn some useful techniques from psychology.

According to experts, you can start with the works of Dale Carnegie, Stephen Covey and Robin Sharma (“How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, “The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari”).

Have your own opinion

A person who has a strong character and is confident that he is right is not afraid to voice his personal opinion. He defends it, even if it is very different from the generally accepted one and is criticized. It is extremely difficult to do this, because often people become slaves to other people's desires and preferences. To emerge from slavery and maintain individuality is a manifestation of strong character.

You need to sit down and seriously think about which actions and actions are committed under pressure from the outside, and which of your own free will. Don’t be embarrassed to end a conversation that’s causing you discomfort just for fear of offending your interlocutor. Or eat a dish in a cafe that you don’t like because the bill has already been paid. Your opinion should come first. You need to learn to defend it. This will help not only become more self-confident, but also develop useful character traits.

Set goals and achieve them

What are goals for? To know the right direction of movement. You need to take a piece of paper and write what you want to strive for. Moreover, it is recommended to clearly indicate the time frame for making your desires come true: a week, a month, a year. After a while, you should check what has already been done from what was written down and make corrections. You can add new goals.

Psychologists advise being specific not only in dates, but also in desires themselves. No need to write vague phrases. Need precision. For example, you can plan to lose a couple of kilograms by a certain date or read an interesting book. If we talk about more global goals, this could be career growth or a vacation in a new place.

Say no

This is a difficult, but at the same time necessary skill. According to many people, the inability to refuse directly and honestly is a manifestation of weak character. Often a person has to sacrifice not only his opinion, but also comfort for the sake of others. The word “no” will help correct the situation.

It is important to learn to respect yourself, your time and personal space. Only then will people treat us the same way.

Learning to say no to something small will help you say “yes” to more significant things in the future. You need to focus your life on them. Small things destroy, take away energy and time.

Take a closer look at your surroundings

Not all friends and relatives will appreciate efforts to change for the better. And this is not surprising, since they are accustomed to using a person for their own selfish purposes. He became “convenient” for them. Someone may be jealous because, due to their own laziness, weakness or circumstances, they cannot do the same.

If you want to develop a strong character, it is better to avoid or minimize communication with such people. They don't help you move forward, but pull you down to the bottom. We need people nearby who follow the same path and are role models. You need to be friends with those who will help you change and become stronger.

Psychologists recommend not to ruin your life next to those who have already ruined yours.

Set goals and achieve them

A goal is needed to know where to go. Write a list of what you want to achieve in a certain period of time - a week, a month, a year. Then compare the results, draw conclusions and write new goals. “More specifics, which can be expressed in terms and numbers, less abstract reasons and phrases,” advises Dmitry Sergeev.

“A person with a weak character does not know what he wants. He is contradictory, disorganized and constantly fluctuates,” says Artem Ivanov. Start from the opposite.

Keep yourself in good physical shape

Being physically strong and healthy is good for your mind too. If you constantly feel tired and in a bad mood, it will be much more difficult for you to solve problems that arise. Don't neglect your body's health if your goal is to be tough. There are a few simple steps to keep your body healthy:

• Get enough sleep. This will keep your body healthy and help you stay alert. The goal is 7-8 hours a day. Make it a priority!
• Eat plenty of vegetables and fruits. By making this the basis of your diet, you will get the vitamins and nutrients your mind needs to stay strong.
• Exercise. Strength training will keep your body and brain in good shape.
• Fight stress. If your world is cluttered with millions of things to do, it will affect your ability to make good decisions.

Saying no

The inability to give direct and honest refusals reveals weakness of character in people, users of The Question are sure. It is important to learn to save your time and set personal boundaries. “The ability to decisively say “no” to unimportant things will give you the strength to say “yes” to something important,” says Dmitry Sergeev. “It is very important to focus on one thing, discarding all external factors. They just destroy you. Give them up in favor of truly important things,” advises Elizabeth Lutes.

How to develop a strong character

You can develop a strong character from early childhood. There are such examples in history. These are knights whose training began at the age of 7. Another option is development as you grow older and solve life problems, as well as overcome some obstacles.

Another way to become stronger is to work on yourself. Here you will have to deliberately create conditions conducive to character development.

How it is impossible to develop a strong character

The process of character development requires, first of all, the desire to act, time, and sometimes self-sacrifice. There are a number of requirements, ignoring which will reduce all efforts to nothing:

• leave your comfort zone;
• get rid of laziness, fears and slavery of habits;
• develop not only in thoughts, but also in deeds;
• exercise as regularly as possible;
• respect yourself, remember your dignity (do not compare with pride and arrogance);
• combat the effects of external factors;
• not to force, but to discipline yourself.

It is impossible to develop a strong character even without a clearly defined goal. A person must have motivation. In its absence, sooner or later he will go astray from the intended path.

Take a closer look at your surroundings

Unfortunately, not everyone will like it if you suddenly start changing for the better. For some you will no longer be “convenient”, others will simply be jealous. If you want to be strong, change your unpleasant environment. “If there are people around you who don’t want to get better and “drag” you down with them without developing, then it’s better to reduce the limit of communication with them. Or cut them out of your life. Find those who are on the same path as you, those who will help you and, thanks to you, become better every day,” says Dmitry Sergeev. “If you don’t want to ruin your life, stay away from those who have already ruined theirs.”

Source: The Question

What qualities are inherent in people with a strong-willed character?

Positive traits are common to all people. It cannot be said that a person possessing these qualities automatically becomes the owner of a strong-willed character. However, these qualities contribute to the development of a strong character and their absence should be compensated for.

So, people with a strong character have:

• discipline and responsibility;
• honesty;
• courage, determination and boldness;
• self-confidence and leadership;
• respect;
• compassion;
• loyalty and reliability;
• patience and attention;
• ambition and motivation;
• determination;
• justice.

The set of qualities of a woman with a strong character differs from that of a man. For representatives of the stronger sex, the following signs of strong-willed character are added to the above:

• respect in society;
• success in the chosen type of activity;
• loyalty to family and ideal;
• following your purpose.

A woman with a strong-willed character also has the following traits:

• independence;
• ability to collaborate with other people;
• taking care of yourself and loved ones;
• accepting others as they are;
• trusting your intuition.

A child can also have the makings of a strong character. These include the following qualities:

• anger and stubbornness (not to be confused with aggression and capriciousness);
• desire for independent decision making;
• it is difficult to force a child to do something without his consent;
• emotional response to failures, the desire to deal with it and complete the work started.

Of course, we are not talking about small children whose character is just beginning to form. And their protests and stubbornness may be the product of another age crisis.