How to Stop Fear of Responsibility from Ruining Your Life

Fear of responsibility is one of the varieties of modern social phobias, scientifically called hypengiophobia. This word comes from the Greek: hypengyon - responsibility and phobos - phobia. Thus, hypengiophobia is an obsessive fear of responsibility, a painful irrational fear of taking on obligations.

The problem of fear of responsibility

The modern world is multivariate and requires the individual to make difficult decisions. People have to take responsibility for their own actions and face the consequences of their choices every day. Many people experience stress as a reaction to the fear of not meeting the expectations of others, missing something and making a mistake.

Panic fear of responsibility causes uncontrollable anxiety and the person becomes hostage to the phobia. Even the simplest tasks seem impossible. Hypengiophobe is afraid of being let down, of not being able to cope, and is slow to make a decision and does not take any action.

Flood

Your task is to completely immerse yourself in the situation that is terrifying for you. Develop your tolerance for the stressful situation of taking responsibility, step by step in your imagination. It is necessary to repeat this procedure in different versions of its development and solution until it is resolved less emotionally and all actions are honed to the point of automaticity. Accordingly, in reality, when you find yourself in such a situation, you will be able to take on this responsibility.

How to determine the presence of a phobic disorder?

Experts in the field of psychology have established that fear of responsibility is a real disease that has its own manifestations.

Physical symptoms of hypongiophobia:

  • quiet voice;
  • cardiopalmus;
  • inability to concentrate on a task;
  • nausea;
  • headache;
  • inability to clearly formulate thoughts;
  • increased sweating.

Psychological manifestations of hypengiophobia:

  • a feeling of depression caused by a feeling of pressure from the outside;
  • the desire to hide, dissolve, disappear;
  • panicked state when thinking about the task;
  • the desire to postpone solving problems until later;
  • irrational feeling of anxiety.

The carrier of the phobia feels internal discomfort, but cannot even explain to himself why he experiences such a set of sensations. He convinces himself that he is tired, that the demands placed on him exceed his authority, and shifts responsibility to others. If an individual can honestly admit to himself: “I am afraid of responsibility,” then this will be the first step towards solving the problem.

Diagnostics

Hypengiophobia, in principle, is not so difficult to calculate. Usually such people speak quietly and try to be “in the shadows.” They find it difficult to express their thoughts out loud. They get lost when they try to assign new responsibilities to him. At work or in the family, hypongiophobes (both men and women) are afraid to take responsibility, which is why they actively shift it to others, blaming them for failures and failures.

Diagnosis is complicated by the fact that a person gradually adapts to the phobia and categorically does not want to recognize the pathology.


From the outside, it seems that only his relatives suffer, who have to solve not only their own problems, but also those of the hypongiophobe’s relative (spouse, colleagues).

The pathology exhausts the patient and provokes health problems such as stomach ulcers, persistent hypertension, and various somatic diseases. Therefore, it is very important to diagnose the disease correctly and begin treatment as early as possible.

Reasons for fear of liability

Fear of taking on obligations can have several reasons for its development:

Childhood education

If parents often criticized the child for mistakes, severely punished him, compared him with other children, demanded excellent studies, then this attitude is imprinted in the mind for the rest of his life. Parental figures are an indisputable authority for the child, who absorbs any attitudes like a sponge, without subjecting them to critical filtration. Due to age, the child’s psyche does not know how to do this.

An adult grows up, expecting accusations, considering himself guilty of everything in advance. In his head, like a record, an accusing monologue sounds: “You are not worthy, you are incompetent, you are a loser, people like you do not achieve anything in life.” The more a person idealizes his strict parents, the more he feels that he is the subject of the evaluative attitude of others, feeling that he will again “get a bad mark.” A fear of responsibility is formed.

Such a person is convinced that he will not be able to take an adult position associated with obligations. Subconsciously, he identifies himself with a punished child who must obey or run away.

Perfectionism

A person is not satisfied with just decent performance indicators of his work; he needs an ideal result. The individual places high demands on himself, just as his parents did in the past. The desire for ideal is characteristic: a perfectionist believes himself to be obliged to produce an excellent result, ahead of the rest. Any activity is perceived as competition.

If it is not possible to achieve the highest indicator in an activity, then self-esteem begins to tend to zero. At work, an employee rarely identifies refusal to perform job duties with the state of “I’m afraid of responsibility”; he prefers to explain it by the erroneous actions of others or inappropriate working conditions. As a result, a person stops trying to achieve something new and gets stuck in the so-called comfort zone, performing long-familiar actions.

Fear of responsibility causes a stop in development, because an irresponsible person does not live up to his own high expectations. At the same time, he does not agree to accept his fairly good indicators, considering them a failure.

Dependence on other people's opinions

This reason, which causes fear of responsibility, contains doubts about one’s own social status, viewing oneself as an outsider, low self-esteem, and fear of public condemnation. A person prefers to “keep a low profile” once again, avoids taking on obligations, and hides behind the backs of more proactive and active people.

The origins of this dependence should also be sought in childhood, where a person had problems entering social life. For example, if a child, as a schoolchild, experienced difficulties with communication, then in adulthood they can develop into social phobia. Self-help tips for dealing with self-doubt are presented here.

Past bad experience

If a person who is not confident in his abilities once failed to cope with the assigned responsibility, there is a high probability that in the future he will begin to avoid repeating such situations. Especially if failure was followed by punishment, for example, deprivation of a bonus for late submission of reports. A suspicious person develops an attitude about the danger of obligations and a fear of responsibility. An avoidance reaction appears.

What does it represent?

Hipengiophobia, another name for this disorder, is one of the most common phobias.

What person has not felt a chill in the back at the thought that he would have to take risks and take responsibility for some events, work issues, the lives of other people?

And if someone simply has anxiety, they experience anxiety at such a moment, then the phobe may well lose consciousness from horror. So right at the meeting, having learned that he has new tasks, he will simply faint or try to escape.

Human life already involves a lot of responsibilities. Starting from the fact that he needs to be responsible for his health, the quality of every day, relationships with other people, and ending with the choice of clothing, a way to earn money for needs, and so on.

Why you won’t envy a hypengiophobe, he often experiences depression due to unmet needs, and neurosis due to frequent stress.

After all, the nervous system is constantly under tension, which depletes the body and provokes the development of chronic diseases. They are also called psychosomatic.

Ways to avoid responsibility

The problem of fear of responsibility is a developed habit, reinforced by repeated repetition. The human psyche shows miracles of ingenuity where it is necessary to change established patterns of behavior. Gravitating toward stability, the psyche resists change. A person unconsciously looks for ways to avoid obligations.

The main methods include:

  • Procrastination, or putting off important tasks until later. Instead of doing the main job, a person does secondary things. May get stuck on social networks for a long time or devote hours to online games. The result is often careless performance of the task, accompanied by feelings of guilt.
  • Bad habits. Alcohol, smoking, overeating - these methods of escaping reality for a while help get rid of the psychological oppression of obligations. Being destructive in nature, they harm the psyche and physical health of the individual.
  • Shifting responsibility. Conventionally, this strategy is called “loser behavior.” The individual justifies his inaction by unfavorable external factors. Blaming other people helps you avoid commitment without feeling guilty.

Treatment

If your loved one, or maybe just someone you know, avoids responsibility, you shouldn’t criticize him and call him lazy and cowardly. He is unable to overcome a phobia with sheer force of will.

So, force yourself to show courage by making an offer, agreeing to run the company, and so on. If only because he would simply lose consciousness.

It is worth remembering that a phobia is a mental disorder that should definitely be treated, and not left to chance, expecting that at one moment the horror will disappear on its own. Therefore, consult a psychotherapist or psychiatrist.

You shouldn’t be afraid of the words of a psychiatrist; you won’t be locked up in a mental hospital. The doctor simply has the right to prescribe medications that are not publicly available. And they require a prescription.

For example, antidepressants and sedatives. They are extremely necessary for a person with a phobic disorder. Since the body is in constant tension.

This depletes his resources and does not give him a chance to experience other emotions not associated with fear. Therefore, therapy and simultaneous use of antidepressants will give faster expected results.

Sleeping pills will allow you to improve your sleep, which will also have a beneficial effect on the recovery process.

You can choose any direction of psychotherapy that interests you the most. The most effective today are cognitive behavioral therapy and gestalt. Hypnosis is also often and quite successfully used.

Consequences of hypengiophobia

The result of this behavior is broken obligations, dissatisfaction with management up to and including dismissal, an unsettled personal life, prolonged stress, and psychosomatic illnesses. Sometimes this state is experienced by top managers of successful companies, realizing that they are responsible for the financial well-being of the entire company.

Regularly postponing decisions and sitting in a corner, a person tries to reduce the likelihood of errors, but in reality he methodically destroys his life. Problems with your personal life, difficulties in building a career, loss of respect from colleagues and acquaintances - this is an incomplete list of the destructive consequences of such a life strategy.

By the way! Psychobiological scientists from Harvard University (USA) discovered that sensitivity to stress is influenced by hereditary factors. About 20% of infants are born with neurochemical characteristics of the psyche, which in adulthood will contribute to the development of hypongiophobia. Such people experience hyper-reactivity in the part of the brain that is responsible for fear.

If there is a hypengiophobe in your environment

From all of the above, it follows that there is no need to treat people with fear of responsibility too harshly. Under no circumstances should you reproach a person. One of the consequences of a phobia is lack of self-confidence. This is the first thing that needs to be dealt with.

Taking a more serious approach to studying the problem, we can conclude that it requires a solution. To live a full life, you need to overcome your phobia. Its absence will help you move up your career ladder, improve yourself and diversify your life. In addition, this is an opportunity to be a completely “healthy” person. And health, as we know, is the most valuable thing. Understanding that we ourselves are responsible for our lives is the right path to happiness and spiritual harmony.

How to stop being afraid of responsibility?

In severe cases, hypengiophobia can paralyze any manifestations of activity and make its carrier a social outcast.

10 ways to stop fear of responsibility from ruining your life:

  1. Changing attitudes towards mistakes. Instead of self-flagellation, you should develop the habit of answering the questions “what was done well?” and “what can we do better next time?”
  2. Stop putting off making a decision. Developing the habit of taking immediate action will significantly reduce stress and improve your quality of life.
  3. Learn self-support. A useful skill will be the ability to praise and reward yourself for actions taken. It is recommended to introduce the practice of daily affirmations - repeated positive phrases.
  4. Meditation, yoga. These practices relax the body as much as possible, relieve muscle tension, and relieve emotional tension.
  5. Take responsibility more often, bringing what you start to the end. Inaction generates fears, energetic steps create confidence. Completeness will give an optimistic outlook on the situation and removes the problem of fear of responsibility.
  6. Cultivate self-confidence. Healthy self-confidence encourages behavioral acts and reduces anxiety in conditions of uncertainty.
  7. Complete rest, daily routine. It is necessary to give the body time to reboot in order to maintain rational thinking and an even emotional state.
  8. Practice making commitments. Voluntary acceptance of responsibility reduces fear of problems and becomes a resource for confronting phobias.
  9. Realize the irrationality of fears by sorting them into pieces. Writing out problems and associated fears will significantly reduce your anxiety level. Analyzing what is written to see if problems are unsolvable will help enhance the effect.
  10. Work with a specialist. This method gives the most stable result. A professional psychologist-hypnotherapist will teach you how to cope with anxiety and not be afraid of responsibility.

Like any disease, hypongiophobia will not go away on its own. Gradually releasing irrational anxiety and making your commitments more challenging will help you overcome your fear of commitment. Working with a specialist, such as Nikita Valerievich Baturin, can correct a person’s self-image, teach them to accept their own imperfections and develop tolerance for failures.

When to contact a professional?

In severe cases, a person suffering from hypengiophobia loses the ability to act adequately. At the moment when he needs to make a decision, he can jump out of the window in a panic, run out into the street, or get hit by a car. If you notice signs of a growing fear of responsibility in yourself or a loved one, do not neglect the services of a professional.

Self-medication will only help to stop the pathological condition . A competent specialist will find the cause of the phobia and help the person change his destructive life attitude and stop being afraid.

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