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Why do people steal? Everyone knows at least one story about a theft committed by a completely decent, law-abiding person. And it doesn’t matter at all whether the kidnapper had material wealth or not. Take, for example, stories about Hollywood actresses caught (repeatedly!) red-handed in stores stealing a penny. What are they missing? It’s impossible to believe that with millions in fees they didn’t have enough money for that scarf.
Then what is it? What is so special about people who are capable of stealing? Let's call on the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan for help and try to figure it out.
Tip 1: How to recognize a thief
Unfortunately, the administration of large stores and supermarkets, where goods are in direct access to customers, very often encounter cases of theft.
The ideal loss from theft is about 0.3% of the value of the goods. In reality, such a loss may be larger, which is a significant amount, given the turnover. Store staff need to be trained in how to spot a thief.
Mila was nice. We lived with her in a student dormitory and often went to each other for tea. She told funny stories.
consoled. when I or my neighbors fell into the blues because of another unsuccessful romance and promised: “Everything will be fine!” Everything would really be fine. if we didn’t start noticing the loss of things and money after every Mila left. Finances are already tight for freshmen.
According to the definition of Yu. M. Antonyan, the personality of a criminal is a set of socio-psychological properties and qualities of a person, which are the causes and conditions for committing crimes. Antonyan Yu. M. Personality of a criminal // Criminology: Textbook / Ed.
Academician V. N. Kudryavtseva, Prof. V. E. Eminova. - M. 1999. - S.
125. All thieves are divided into different groups, which have their own methods, techniques, and specialization.
Legs
Many people naively think that the easiest way to recognize a liar is by his face, but that was not the case! A person’s legs provide much more information. Surely you have experienced such situations. You sit next to a person and ask him a provocative question. In response to this, he begins to twitch his legs. This most likely means he is lying.
By the way, do not forget about the starting point in all cases. There are people who almost always twitch their legs when talking.
Customs officers are also taught to watch their feet. If during a conversation with an employee the legs are pointed at him, then the person has nothing to hide. And if the feet are facing the exit, then the customs officer may suspect that something is dirty.
I want to steal a mammoth and a stone ax
All thieves have something in common: the so-called skin vector. System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan defines a vector as a set of specific desires and properties for their implementation. From birth, people with the skin vector have two main desires: to get and to save - money, things, food. And also time, strength, energy, distance. Owners of the skin vector feel extraordinary pleasure from extraction and preservation.
Vectors develop from the opposite - from a simple (archetypal state) to a complex one. And a thief is just a basic stage in the development of a person with a skin vector. A little person with a skin vector is born and immediately says: “Give!” He reaches out to everything he wants, takes everything without asking. And only then is he taught to prohibitions and restrictions.
Stealing means: getting everything just for yourself. That is, to satisfy the desire to obtain and preserve - for oneself.
If for a developed and realized person, “getting and saving” means earning money and wisely disposing of what you have earned, then for a person with the archetypal skin vector, earning money is theft, and saving is “Plyushkinism.” In essence, a person simply steals a conditional mammoth from the strong and robs the weak. In addition to the “booty” he received, he feels a sweet buzz from the adrenaline rush (if he gets caught, he doesn’t get caught). Once you start stealing and enjoy it, the buzz doesn’t go away.
With professional thieves and robbers, everything is basically clear. And what about the people who are obsessed with temporary theft? What's happening to them?
Why do children lie and steal? Stealing as a way to attract attention
To understand why a child steals money from relatives and friends of the family, you need to analyze your life and the child’s behavior
The reason for children's theft may be a desire to attract attention.
Most often, such thefts are committed by elementary schoolchildren and teenagers. But such behavior usually develops at an early age. Children feel a lack of love or complete indifference from loved ones. To get noticed, they steal things.
The child commits his first thefts even before entering school. They may go unnoticed or not given importance. As a child grows up, he steals more and more often and does it more ostentatiously. However, he persistently refuses to admit his guilt and acts as if nothing bad happened. Thieves do not pursue any goals when committing theft. They do this unconsciously and cannot explain the motives for their action.
This behavior causes irritation and anger of relatives. They are ready to forgive the thief if he repents and asks for forgiveness. But persistent denial pushes parents away from him. Relatives are moving away, relations between them are hopelessly deteriorating. Adults consider the child an immoral monster.
Children who commit such theft are open and friendly towards others. They easily make contact and share their secrets. These are sensitive, vulnerable and insecure teenagers. They need the support of loved ones whom they push away with their behavior. Stealing is a cry for help, a way to reach adults.
How to help yourself
These tips for Kleptomania can improve the effect of professional treatment, but do not replace it.
- Stick to your treatment plan. Take your medications as scheduled and do not miss therapy sessions.
- Try to identify triggers. These are thoughts, feelings, situations that push you to want to steal.
- Substance addiction or depression can trigger cycles of theft. Consult your doctors to get rid of these problems.
- Explore where you can redirect your desire to steal. Sometimes exercise, going to a movie or a concert helps.
- Try techniques that help you relax. For example, yoga, meditation, tai chi.
- Focus on the goal. Treatment can be long, and this helps to maintain motivation.
Psychology of a thief. What does the man who stole millions from the people think about?
Details Category: Ukraine Published 04/21/2014 11:08
Have you ever wondered, dear reader, what the man who stole a million from the people was thinking about? Not in small things, but in big ways, a whole million? Does he think that he is a criminal, a thief, a criminal scum? About people who were robbed and left without a livelihood? About how to build factories, develop the economy with stolen money, and provide income for robbed people? Not every person is psychologically capable of daring and cruel robbery of people. Only a person who is morally prepared for this and already has a corresponding defective psychology can steal a million. What kind of psychology is this? This is the psychology of a thief. The man who stole a million presented his flawed psychology to society at the moment of committing the crime. He will think and act in accordance with his psychology, the psychology of a thief. First of all, deep contempt for the society in which he lives. Then - security: it is necessary to preserve oneself and the stolen goods. The thief is fully aware of the danger that arises after committing a crime. The sophisticated mind of a thief, driven by the instinct of self-preservation, will come up with dozens of ways of action. Morality will not limit these actions. A thief has no morals. Then, a thief, unable and unwilling to engage in productive work due to his psychology, will want to steal more and more. To get rich as much as possible and as quickly as possible. And, finally, realizing the precariousness of his position, the thief will want to give his theft a legal appearance - to legitimize the illegal. This is why we need state power - to legitimize our theft. Here, in Ukraine, the psychology of a thief is presented to the people in full. And people who are robbed will have problems, and big ones. They need to live, but there are no funds. The funds ended up in the hands of a thief. And now - take a loan from a thief (“credit” in their name) and fall into eternal bondage. Or - hire a thief as a farm laborer, on his, the thief’s, terms, and also end up in eternal bondage. Or - leave your family and go abroad to become “Ostarbeiters”. Or - die under the fence (there is nothing to maintain the apartment, and the bandits will take it away). Major crimes cannot be committed alone, so thieves do not act alone. They come to an agreement with each other and form gangs. And such a gang, enriched by theft, having the necessary intellectual capital and connections, declares itself as a private enterprise, or a public organization, or even as a “party” (parliamentary political party). But in fact, the gang remains a gang whose goal is maximum enrichment for minimum period. The methods are the same: theft and robbery - thieves don’t know how and don’t want anything else. But the ordinary crime gang has already outgrown it - the scale is not the same. And it becomes too expensive to hide crimes. Therefore, going to power becomes a priority task. In the former “totalitarian” USSR, a gang that showed such activity would have already come to an end. It would have been “packed” long ago. That’s why the bandits so fiercely and consistently destroyed the Soviet Union and socialism, and introduced “democracy” in order to get “freedom” - for themselves. Now, under the influence of “democracy” and “freedom” the following metamorphoses have occurred in society: at first the bandits were below state power, then they became on par with it, and now they are higher. A social “miracle” occurred, possible only in a “democratic” country - the bandits ceased to be bandits, but became “politicians”, “statists”, “businessmen”. The gang will be given a special “party-political” status. The “program” and “charter” of the “party” were written, false rhetoric and the necessary party attributes were developed. It will be announced to the robbed people that the specified gang (now a legitimate political party) is a benefactor of the people, protects the interests of the people. And under their party flags, to the crackling of party slogans, to the ringing of populist promises, the gang will move to the elections: to local councils, to the Supreme Radu, to the chair of the President. The weapons in the election war will be: arrogance, lies, intimidation, bribery. Infiltrating the Verkhovna Rada and becoming President is the ultimate goal of the thief. Because from these heights of power, you can steal and rob in the country without limit and with impunity. This is what the thief who stole millions of people’s money thinks about. And nothing can stop the thief, with stolen millions and billions, who has known the euphoria of power. No articles in newspapers, no persuasion, no appeals to conscience, not even prison. Only death...N.A.Perevozchikov, Cherkasy (original spelling and punctuation preserved)
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WHAT TO DO?
It is not easy to stop a child from stealing. Let's walk this path together.
If your child has minor intrapsychic disorders, and you yourself are quite adequate, and the situation around the child is more or less friendly and stable, then the following recommendations may help:
- Become more attentive to your child.
- Show him more love and care.
- Help your child understand his troubles.
- Talk to him not only about homework and cleaning the children's room.
To be attentive to your child is to know what he dreams of, what he is interested in, how he feels, who he is friends with, what he is afraid of, what he wants from you, from his friends, what his life is filled with in the intervals between studying and eating.
Naturally, for this it is necessary to spend some time with the child “just like that”: walk together, play, watch cartoons, talk, communicate with words and enjoy it. It is clear that modern parents, forced to do everything on the run, often cannot find time to communicate with their child “just like that,” and not for some purpose.
What to do? In fact, you can find time. When the weather permits, go out of town on a day off (you don’t need to have a car for this, and it’s even more fun for a child to take the train). It would be a good idea to bring your child’s friends along with you. By doing this, you kill two birds with one stone: firstly, it will be easier to establish communication with the child in a group. And secondly, you will find out with whom and how he communicates, and you will be able to gradually control this process.
When you and your child light a fire or fry sausages over the fire, these minutes can become moments of your spiritual closeness. It is not necessary to tell your son or daughter moralizing things; it is more important to simply be “together” with them, both in soul and in thoughts.
It is important to encourage the presence of your child's friends in your home. Yes, it’s troublesome, but it’s also a way to prevent the teenage crisis.
When you take your child to or from school, this time can also be used to communicate. Tell him about yourself: about your thoughts, views, feelings, about your childhood, about your joys and problems (about problems, of course, within reasonable limits and in a language understandable to him).
At almost any age, you can resume reading at night or just reading aloud, you just need to choose books that suit your age and interests. And then we can discuss these books. You can even discuss cartoons you watched together. Yes, we all don’t have enough time, but if you want, you can always come up with something.
You can agree with other family members on how to allocate time so that there is enough time to communicate with the child; many things can simply be done together: together with a girl, sew dresses for dolls and cook, together with a boy, glue models and do basic repairs. It is more difficult to come to an agreement with yourself, much more difficult to learn to enjoy communicating with a child when you are tired and your only desire is for everyone to leave you alone. But these are the problems of the parents themselves, and a topic for another conversation.
What does it mean to help a child understand his troubles? This does not mean at all that you need to go and sort things out with your friends or teachers. Although in exceptional cases (a child is often beaten by his peers or teachers are very unfair to him), this must be done, because besides you, the child has no other protection and support.
It is important here to form a habit in your child of discussing with you what worries him. First, teach him to simply talk about unpleasant things and events
And help to survive painful feelings, share them with the child. The main thing in your communication with a child or teenager is sincerity. If the child feels that you are sincerely interested in him and are not following some “recommendations,” then the child will definitely respond.
All these tips will definitely help a little thief cope with the problem if he does not suffer from kleptomania.
How is kleptomania treated?
It is almost impossible to cope with the disorder on your own. If you do not undergo special therapy, the deviation will be tormented constantly. But fear and embarrassment often prevent kleptomaniacs from seeking help. When an adult is still ready to admit the problem, he needs to make an appointment with a psychotherapist.
If you notice How To Help a Friend With Kleptomania symptoms of kleptomania in someone close to you, first try talking to them tactfully. But keep in mind, he may deny the presence of a deviation. Sometimes, out of embarrassment, people refuse to discuss the topic altogether.
Kleptomaniacs are often forced to see a psychotherapist by other problems: Kleptomania: Emerging therapeutic target mood, impulsive behavior, which spoil the quality of life. For example, the already mentioned substance addiction, eating disorder or anxiety.
There are several treatments for Kleptomania kleptomania. The doctor may combine them.
Medicines
Let's say right away that there are no drugs for kleptomania. But some patients are prescribed Kleptomania: Management and Treatment antidepressants, which sometimes help curb the urge to steal.
A specialist may also prescribe opioid receptor antagonists. They reduce the pleasure and attraction to theft.
Psychotherapy
This is the main treatment method. Its goal in Kleptomania: Management and Treatment is to help a person understand why they have no impulse control. During the sessions, patients learn to control the urge to steal. Those who have depression and anxiety get rid of them too.
During cognitive behavioral therapy for Kleptomania, the doctor may recommend several techniques. For example, if you intend to steal, hold your breath until you feel disgust from the idea itself. Another way that helps some people is to imagine themselves stealing and then visualize the unpleasant consequences.
A child steals from school. Why does a child steal?
The reasons for child theft can be different:
Not fully formed moral ideas and life principles. A small child may simply not know or understand that taking someone else’s thing is regarded as theft and is a bad act. In this case, blaming the baby is pointless, because he does not realize his guilt until he has learned the basics of morality. Psychological dissatisfaction, a feeling of personal inadequacy. If a child feels unwanted or lonely, then he will look for ways to achieve emotional balance, and he can try to achieve it with the help of money
For many children, finances are personified as an indicator of status in society, of some importance. So, being “rich” a teenager can gain authority at school
He will also allow himself to buy sweets and toys, and they also give pleasure and some kind of psychological satisfaction. An irresistible desire to take possession of something. If a child likes a toy, then thoughts of getting it can simply overshadow moral concepts and social taboos. Unfortunately, this happens often, both among children and among teenagers. Lack of material assets. If the family lives in poverty, then it is quite logical that the child will feel inferior and disadvantaged, and he may also become an object of ridicule from classmates. And in this case, he may well decide to steal, the main goals of which are to be like everyone else or to be rich. The desire to give someone a gift. If a child wants to please someone or show his affection, but does not have the money to buy a gift, then he may well give someone else’s thing that he stole. But this reason, as a rule, follows from the first one, because children who have moral concepts and understand the essence of theft will probably come up with another way to please a loved one. Imitating someone, for example, a friend, acquaintance, or some negative character in a comic book, film or cartoon. A child may steal something to take revenge on the owner of the item.
Thief - not forever
Everyone has their own threshold for sensitivity to overstress. But after the short period of overexertion ends, the person comes to his senses and returns to his usual behavior.
Everything happens for a reason. Perhaps the celebrities caught stealing the day before lost a lucrative contract. Or, when they got a great role, they were passed over by other competitors.
It is interesting that celebrities who have experienced overstress or are underdeveloped in the skin vector are defended by lawyers with the same skin vector... But - at a good level of implementation in a society adequate to the modern stage of human development. And if one realizes himself according to the principle of “taking someone else’s,” then the other – “keeping what is someone else’s.”
Article on the topic of kleptomania: www.yburlan.ru/biblioteka/kleptomaniya
You can learn more about the skin vector, and more, at free online trainings on systemic vector psychology by Yuri Burlan. Registration here: www.yburlan.ru/training
Author: Yulia Merkulova
The article was written using materials from online trainings on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan
Story three
And one more example. The mother of eleven-year-old Olya (name changed) periodically checks her daughter’s briefcase and discovers a bunch of various little things that Olya takes from the briefcases and pockets of her classmates. Nothing helps: neither intimate conversations, nor a belt. Olya cries and says that she won’t do it again, but after some time other people’s things appear in the house again.
With the money she steals from her pockets, Olya buys all sorts of things that she already has: erasers, bright notebooks, rulers, notebooks, etc. And one day Olya stole a large amount of money from her mother, bought a Barbie, a house for Barbie and tried to “give” all this to a classmate, with the condition that she would come to visit her and play with these toys.
The girl has no friends, moreover, she is an outcast in the class. None of her classmates will pass by her without kicking, pushing her, or saying something offensive (the class teacher confirms this information). Of course, the class knows that she is a thief, because of this, my mother is going to change schools. And, naturally, she is very afraid that the new school will have the same problems. When communicating with me, Olya either carefully avoids conversations on this topic, or formally agrees that this is bad, it bothers her and that she will try not to do this again.
This pale, thin, almost transparent girl with huge blue eyes, half hidden by her blond curls, knows how to sit motionless for a long time, looking above all objects. She becomes animated only when she talks about animals and her fantasies, where everything is cloudless and simple.
Despite the stylish mom's efforts, she always looks casually dressed. Mom complains that Olya is extremely lazy, absent-minded and forgetful: when getting ready for school, she may forget to put on underwear, does not do her homework, does not clean the house, and “forgets” about her promises. “At times she just makes me pound, I’m ready to kill her,” says my mother. She just can’t establish contact with her daughter, a mother who almost committed suicide as a child, suffering from a misunderstanding of her own mother.
Story two
A mother came to the reception with her ten-year-old son. Very large for his age and well-fed, he sat lazily lounging on the sofa, and seemed to show no interest in what was happening in the office. From time to time, not paying attention to the fact that my mother was busy talking to me, he leaned over to my mother and whispered something in her ear. My mother was forced to come see me by a situation that happened a week ago.
Mom looked depressed. Her voice, low, monotonous and soporific, was the voice of a woman tired of life, a young woman, tired of loneliness and endless work. She also talked about how exhausted she was until her last breath by the many years of struggle with this difficult child who had been her pain, happiness and curse since early childhood.
Article information
This article was co-authored by. Paul Cherniak is a licensed psychotherapist in Chicago. Graduated from the American School of Professional Psychology in 2011.
Categories: Personal Development
In other languages:
English: Understand Why People Choose to Steal, Español: entender por qué la gente elige robar, Italiano: Capire Perchè le Persone Decidono di Rubare, Português: Compreender Por Que as Pessoas Escolhem Roubar, Français: comprendre pourquoi des gens choisissent de voler, Deutsch : Verstehen lernen, warum Menschen stehlen, Bahasa Indonesia: Memahami Alasan Seseorang untuk Mencuri
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How to stop a teenager from stealing. Heroic or shameful act?
How to stop an 8 year old child from stealing? Most often, he steals not because he is in great need and lacks pocket money. The reason may be the desire to stand out among your friends, to get approval from them, to seem cooler. It is no secret that children do not see theft as a crime. In their environment, this is taken as “sleight of hand.” This behavior is approved by the children gathered in the group, especially in adolescence. It is the herd instinct that most often pushes a child from a financially prosperous family to commit theft. Stories about the “heroic deed” - theft of the leader of the courtyard community, provoke other, more weak-willed children to the same feats. Children are interested in being surrounded by strong guys. If a child's self-esteem is low, he will steal and brag about it for no other reason than to avoid appearing weak.
Wallet? What wallet?
The factor that lets the “playful little hands” of a person with the skin vector off the leash and turns off the brain of even the most law-abiding citizen is overstress.
Superstress is a situation that requires a person to take actions that he or she is either incapable of, or more than a person is able to perform.
In any vector, overstress is a short-term blow to basic values. In the skin vector, this is an unbearable loss of money and time. For example, if a person’s contract fails, he will not receive a bonus for it. The house burned down, and the mortgage needs to be paid. A huge trauma is the loss of a job, a source of income, which is felt as a threat to a person’s existence.
At the moment of experiencing superstress, a person with a skin vector seems to return, “fall” into the archetype. In an attempt to preserve himself, he manifests himself as a person with undeveloped qualities. And his psyche views overstress as a loss of a sense of security, a threat to survival. Feeling the need to survive, a person with a skin vector unconsciously begins to perform an early species task - to steal. This way he relieves stress and eases his mental state.
Psychology of a thief who commits a theft
Chapter 3 L tenants, housekeepers, acquaintances who are trusted to look after the apartment, etc. Typical victimogenic behavior of victims is to leave the keys to the apartment in the mailbox, under the rug, and in other designated places.
In all these situations, victims make a significant contribution to the crime being committed, and eliminating such situations can significantly reduce the number of burglaries committed. Criminal victimology deals with theft.
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COULD HE BE SICK?
If, despite all the care, love and affection shown in communicating with your baby, trinkets of unknown origin still appear in your home, this is a cause for concern. Perhaps the child really does suffer from a rare disease - kleptomania. But do not rush to label it a mental disorder; it is better to seriously think about professional help from a psychologist or psychotherapist.
It is important to understand: with kleptomania, theft is a consequence, a secondary problem in relation to the internal defects of the child’s psyche. Children with kleptomania simply do not have the ability to control their impulses or understand their behavior
Therefore, in order for a child with a mental disorder to stop stealing, he needs to be treated. But remember, such a serious diagnosis as kleptomania can only be made by a professional psychotherapist.
Why do people steal? Realization of the loser complex
People with the skin vector, born breadwinners, and in their ancient roots simply thieves, must develop into their opposite - legislators, engineers, military men, athletes and businessmen. But under certain circumstances and due to the lack of proper upbringing in the family, they may remain in their undeveloped state. If children with the skin vector are beaten or verbally humiliated, they gradually get used to such stress and begin to release endorphins, receiving punishment, then realizing a masochistic scenario or loser complex for the rest of their lives.
