Husband corresponds with another woman - why, what to do: advice from psychologists

If your husband is corresponding with someone else, then read the tips in the article. They will help you find a way out of the situation.

Marital fidelity, like love, is one of the key aspects of a happy family life. If at the very beginning a husband and wife usually dote on each other and don’t even think about cheating, then over the years the situation may become different. Boredom, routine, constant quarrels in the house - all this sooner or later leads to the fact that someone “breaks down” and decides to commit a dishonest act. Moreover, betrayal can be not only physical - in the age of electronic and Internet technologies, finding a lover or mistress by correspondence is easier than ever.

Read an article on our website on the topic “Top 8 Signs of Your Husband’s Cheating . From this article you will learn how to understand that he is really unfaithful to you and has found someone else.

As statistics show, most often it is men who make virtual girlfriends in secret from their legal wives. Communication can be innocent or go beyond friendly conversations. In any case, it causes severe pain to the deceived woman. Is it possible to cope with the problem and return your loved one to the family, or is the only way out is divorce? Let's find out the opinion of experienced psychologists and consider practical advice that has already saved more than one family from destruction. Read on.

How to understand that your husband is texting with another woman: how to find out who your husband is texting with?

A husband is texting another woman.
Women's intuition is a rather powerful feeling that often accurately determines what is really happening. However, in this case, it is impossible to come to your partner with accusations of cheating, backing it up with the phrase “I feel so . More weighty arguments are needed, because we are talking about the fate of the family and the happiness of both spouses.

So, how can you understand that your husband has found a new hobby on the Internet and is corresponding with another woman? How to find out who your husband is texting with? Everything is more than simple, study the following obvious signs of betrayal:

Behavior Change:

Has your partner, always gentle and courteous, suddenly started being rude to you? Has he become nervous and irritable, and sometimes even reacts sharply to basic requests that he previously fulfilled unquestioningly and with joy? This is your first alarm bell.
And vice versa. If suddenly your husband begins to show more attention to you, showers you with gifts and compliments, although he used to act calmer, you should be wary.
Most likely, this is how he is simply trying to make amends to you and divert suspicion from himself.

The partner spends a lot of time on the phone, tablet, computer:

Moreover, you know for sure that at a particular time he is not busy with his work. And will he hide the gadget if he is really fulfilling, say, an urgent order for a project?
Another bell is the frequent signal from the device about a new message.
Your attempts to see who wrote what to him are nipped in the bud by your spouse, or even cause aggression in him.

Husband texts another woman
Emotions while reading a message:

Cheaters often set silent mode or vibration so that the sound of an incoming message is minimal or absent altogether.
But, nevertheless, the man still cannot hide the fact that he is reading the message.
In this case, monitor his emotions. When talking to another woman, he may smile, periodically laugh loudly, become completely involved in the conversation and not notice that you are nearby.
Although some, especially clever cheaters, have learned to put on a “poker face” so as not to arouse suspicion.
In this case, focus on other possible signs of a virtual affair with your loved one.

Checking the gadget from time to time:

Even if the husband is not engaged in intimate correspondence with another at the moment, he will still periodically check the phone and see if a new message has arrived.
In addition, he will never leave the gadget unattended, and if he has to do this, you will not be able to check anything.
First, it immediately deletes its incoming and outgoing messages.
Secondly, all his devices have a strong password, and it’s not his date of birth or your wedding.

You can also quickly see the message your chosen one received from his mistress. Even words taken out of context, but with a romantic meaning, should give you serious reasons to think.

Wow, what a one!i

The “boredomed” guy was wandering through the pages of his acquaintances and unexpectedly came across the profile of a former classmate. Wow, as a child she was an ugly duckling, and years later she blossomed like the Swan Princess. Instead of thin braids, the beauty’s shoulders are shrouded in snow-white curls, and her plain eyes, under the hand of an experienced makeup artist, shone with new colors.

The man remembers that during his school years a girl was in love with him and his interest in the young lady grows. He writes a greeting, she replies, and the innocent correspondence begins to gain momentum. At night before going to bed, hugging his other half, the guy recalls her new appearance with interest and plans to update her avatar so that the interlocutor will show mutual interest and awaken old feelings.

Why did my husband begin to secretly and constantly, for a year, correspond with other girls: reasons

The husband began secretly and constantly, for a year, to correspond with other girls.
So, you found out (or suspected) that your spouse is communicating with other women on the Internet, and this has been going on for quite a long time. Before you think about how to solve the problem or whether it is time to end your relationship, try to understand what prompted your life partner to do such an act. Why did my husband begin to secretly and constantly, throughout the year, correspond with other girls? Perhaps this is your fault? No matter how hard it is to admit, it is often the wives themselves who are to blame for the fact that their husbands begin to look “to the left.”

In general, psychologists name 12 reasons why virtual or real infidelity occurs in families:

Lack of attention and communication . Household chores, work, children, daily routine and personal hobbies can get in the way of a full-fledged relationship between spouses. This is one of the most common reasons why men look for lovers on the Internet or in real life.
The spouse’s desire to escape from everyday problems and financial difficulties.
Fatigue, moral burnout.
Lack of romance in relationships with your significant other.
Boring sex life or complete disappearance of mutual attraction.
Crisis in relationships . According to psychologists, there can be quite a lot of crisis moments in family life. The situation depends on how the spouses cope with difficulties and whether they know how to overcome them together. If one person turns out to be weaker, he begins to look for an outlet on the side.
Lack of common interests , reluctance or inability to discuss household and work matters together.
A man wants to get the attention of other women , but real betrayal does not appeal to him.
The chosen one has no friends who share his interests.
Desire to communicate with new people.
Excessive passion for virtual life . This is already a serious problem, since Internet addiction is not a fiction, but, alas, already a reality.

This is not a complete list of reasons why a man might start corresponding with other women. Some representatives of the stronger sex cannot suppress polygamy within themselves, and they are literally attracted to beautiful girls. And even loving their wife, they are unable to cope with this attraction. Polygamy is not just another reason for infidelity. This may be the essence of a man, and no matter what you try, it will be of no use. The man will still cheat.

Tired of hiding?

One day, having stumbled upon a guy’s correspondence with other girls, it will be difficult to restrain yourself in the future, so as not to get into his phone again. At the same time, it is very important that the young man does not notice that his personal belongings have been rummaged through, because this will only anger him and lead to a scandal. And to solve the problem delicately, you must first find out who these girls are to him. Perhaps these are just work colleagues, and there is nothing shameful or compromising in their communication, purely business conversations.

But if a guy corresponds with other girls on more than neutral topics, but rather, on the contrary, it looks like flirting or intimate conversations, then it’s time to intervene. The main thing is to do so as not to destroy your own relationship with your jealousy. But why does a man who, according to him, loves only one person, communicate with the fair sex too openly and unrestrainedly?

My husband is texting his ex-girlfriend: why, what to do?

Husband is texting with ex-girlfriend
If a husband is texting with his ex-wife or a girl he dated for quite a long time, don’t rush to boil over. Analyze the situation and call your loved one for a frank conversation. Try to understand the motives of his action, but do not blame, do not make trouble or cry. Such actions can only aggravate the situation, but do not improve it. Why is he texting her and what should he do?

One of the main reasons why husbands communicate with ex-wives is the presence of a child together. After all, a real loving father cannot erase a child from his life just for the reason that he and his mother are no longer together.
You, as an understanding wife, should not protest, but offer your chosen one your help.
There is nothing wrong with spending time together with the child of the man you love.
And if you already have children together, this is even better - they will have a brother or sister, and many people dream about this.

If you don’t really like this idea, then just remain calm and silent. The husband will not give up his child from his first marriage, and he will have to periodically communicate with his mother. Your complaints and displeasure can cause loud scandals in the family, the consequences of which are sometimes quite serious.

A husband is texting a female colleague: why is she writing to him?

Husband chats with a female colleague
Particularly jealous women can accuse their partner of cheating even when he chats with a female colleague at work. In fact, such communication does not always indicate an office romance - it is really related to corporate issues. But if this worries you, you can safely ask your husband an innocent question.

Why is she writing to him? Ask if something happened at work that he is worried about. If possible, get as close to the phone screen as possible to see at least a few lines from the correspondence.

If your partner reacts sharply to your curiosity, tries to hide what he or she has written, or starts yelling, you may doubt that this is about work.
However, when he really has nothing to hide, the chosen one will never reproach you for being too curious or invading your personal space.
He may complain about his colleague’s intrusiveness or inexperience, and will end up showing you his correspondence history.
If this happens, close this topic and never open it again.

Do not try to put pressure on your husband or warn him, because he is forced to communicate with people at work, even if his interlocutor is a young girl.

Attention to screen2

Every time a man returns from work, the first thing he does is rush to the computer. He speaks fluently to his beloved and absentmindedly answers questions. His attention is riveted to the monitor: what did she answer? what did you write? ... The partner notices unexpected changes in the sweetheart, asks questions, glances sideways at his correspondence, and this behavior begins to irritate the man.

Unobtrusive communication is gradually being squeezed into personal life and takes a dominant place in it. The guy spends his everyday life waiting for an answer from his interlocutor, her reaction to his phrases or photographs.

My husband is texting a friend: what should I do?

Husband is texting with girlfriend
This situation can be looked at from two angles:

The husband corresponds with his old acquaintance or girlfriend, with whom he has a lot in common:

In fact, there is nothing wrong with this, because he could have known this woman even before he met you or your wedding.
In such a situation, jealousy and suspicion will be unnecessary.
In addition, your spouse may well show you the history of correspondence with a friend if you ask him about it.
But be prepared for refusal, since there may be something personal in the messages.
Yes, this is offensive for you, but remember, you also have little secrets from your lover.
Women's secrets that you can reveal only to your friends, or not tell anyone about them at all. It’s the same with men, so sometimes you shouldn’t invade their personal space.

Your husband is texting your friend:

Again, look at the situation.
Perhaps such correspondence is a very rare occurrence, and your friend just wanted to ask for male advice on this or that issue.
If the communication is annoying, constant, and contains elements of flirting, then you need to act.
Unfortunately, it is dangerous to be friends with such a person who is trying to get into someone else’s family, so you will have to end any relationship between you and your friend, as well as between her and your husband.

The main thing is not to cut from the shoulder. Almost any situation can be resolved calmly and peacefully, if only you want it. Divorce is a last resort, so think it over several times before. If you don’t know what to do, be sure to discuss the situation with your chosen one. Perhaps everything will become clearer, and you worried in vain.

Prohibited tricks

When a husband corresponds with other girls on the Internet, it is difficult to behave adequately. Resentment, aggression and a desire for revenge appear. You must understand that negativity begets negativity. Even if your spouse has stumbled, there is no point in using prohibited techniques. Otherwise, you will be no different from your dishonest other half. What not to do if your husband is texting another girl:

Throwing a tantrum with breaking dishes. This behavior clearly will not lead to a constructive conversation. During a strong conflict, the husband will take a defensive position, will not be in the mood for dialogue, and may even leave home. Attacking like an angry predator is the lot of emotionally weak women who cannot control themselves. Imagine yourself how you look from the outside during a hysteria. In addition, a calm and friendly person who actively corresponds with your husband will look much more advantageous against the backdrop of a vixen wife.
Control your husband from now on. If you have already discussed everything and come to a consensus, then it is stupid to continue to torment your spouse with suspicions. And even more so, snatching the phone from his hands, rushing into his toilet with a victory cry. Don't look for problems for yourself, learn to trust your man. If he wants to continue corresponding with the ladies, then believe me, now he will hide it so carefully that you will never know about anything. And suspicions will only fuel his desire to continue his anti-family acts.
To take revenge. Your relationship will not improve if you take revenge. Even if cheating happened, and you learned about it from the correspondence between your spouse and your mistress, jumping into bed with the first person you meet is not a way out of the situation. And there is no point in urgently registering on a dating site and looking for a virtual gentleman there. Better take care of yourself: appearance, self-development and attitude towards your husband. Such activities will bear fruit, unlike the soul-poisoning thirst for revenge.

When you are hurt and offended by the fact that your husband is wasting his attention on someone else, it is very difficult to control yourself. Don’t blame yourself if you lose your temper and say too much, which doesn’t happen to anyone. It is important to realize your mistakes in time and take the next, only the right step towards your personal happiness.

How to behave if you find your husband texting?

I caught my husband texting
If you caught your loved one texting and you are absolutely sure that his interlocutor is a woman, here is your first piece of advice: pull yourself together. Take a deep breath and exhale several times to clear your thoughts and completely calm down. After this, try to call your partner for a frank conversation. How to behave correctly if you find your husband texting?

Explain to him that the current situation is unpleasant for you.
Bring to the attention that his constant sitting on the phone makes you lonely, that you miss him.
Tell the truth: you think that he doesn’t love you anymore, he’s not interested in you, you’re afraid of betrayal in real life, etc.
Don't put off having a frank conversation with your husband or boyfriend. Remember that the longer you remain silent and patient, the more intense your emotional suffering will become.

Remember: Turning a blind eye to a problem that has already arisen can later cause your fears to come true. Communication between a husband and another girl is quite capable of developing into real betrayal and frequent meetings.

It is important not to be afraid to speak directly:

If your partner’s correspondence with a friend or lover has touched you to the quick, caused anger or depression, do not remain silent.
Express everything to your husband, but only in a calm tone.
If he is a decent and sensible person, he will understand his mistake and will no longer act inappropriately.

But, if he begins to deny, deny and reproach or blame you for his actions, then it is unlikely that he will be able to establish a healthy and trusting relationship with such a person in the future.

Check the young man's phone and social networks

If a lady has the following thought in her head: “My boyfriend talks to other girls,” then the first thing to do is look at her beloved’s mobile phone. No matter how wrong it may seem, the whole truth most likely lies there. Initially, SMS correspondence is checked. Of course, if a young man hides his passion for others, then the entire story will be deleted, and the new object of desire will be renamed by some nickname or even signed as a man or an organization, for example, “car wash”, “locksmith”, “Tolyan”, etc. .

If you couldn’t find anything on the phone itself, then you need to get to social networks. There is a high probability that communication will remain intact in some of them. But if there is no correspondence there, then the list of his female friends is carefully studied. And if you go from his page, then, most likely, the competitor will be on the list of people hidden from all network users.

The phone call history also tells a lot. The number that is dialed most often should arouse suspicion. The length of the telephone conversation is especially important. It is unlikely that a guy will be able to communicate with men for hours.

When your loved one's phone rings, you need to pay attention to the number, and then to the person's behavior. If he immediately hangs up, picks up the phone and quickly says he'll call back later, or goes into another room to talk, then it's safe to assume that the guy is talking to other girls.

If the telephone conversation is long and always takes place alone, then there is a high probability that the interlocutor on the other end of the line may be one of your former lovers. When a guy suddenly begins to deprive his significant other of attention, doesn’t give her flowers, doesn’t give her surprises as before, doesn’t even give trivial compliments, then he’s infatuated with someone else, and all the lust has transferred to her. And his once beloved girl began to irritate him.

I found out that my husband is corresponding with someone else: advice from a psychologist on how to maintain a relationship?

I found out that my husband was corresponding with someone else.
So, you found out that your chosen one, your husband, has a pen pal, another woman, and their communication is not as innocent as it might seem at first glance. It involves not just correspondence, but also photo exchange, flirting, periodic video calls or other unacceptable actions. What can you do in this case? How to save a relationship?

First of all, your man himself must realize that the act committed against you is a betrayal on his part. And not only understand, but also admit it. Then you can move on to improve your relationship with your lover.

What do psychologists say to do in this situation? Here are some tips:

Read the messages:

But only if you know for sure that you want it. Women often invent problems themselves that may not actually exist. Only if you nevertheless decide to take this step, keep in mind that your chosen one may well refuse you to view the history of his correspondence.

What you can see on your spouse's phone:

Innocent communication limited to the phrases “Hello. How are you? What are you doing?".
Friendly correspondence with light flirting, where the initiative comes exclusively from the interlocutor, and the man does not react to this or laughs it off.
Intimate chat with erotic photographs on one or both sides.

It is from what you manage to find out while reading your loved one’s correspondence that you need to build on when making a decision. But before you decide to take this step, think several times: do you really need this?

Find out the reasons:

Finding out why your chosen one started communicating with another girl is the first thing you should do.
Only your conversation needs to be structured in a friendly manner, without reproaches, scandals and “attacks” on your lover.
Show him that you are ready to listen, understand and forgive him if necessary.
Ask him what didn’t suit him in your relationship, since he decided to do such an act.

Be as friendly and patient as possible. Don't interrupt or criticize. Let your partner have the opportunity to speak first, and then analyze the situation together and make a decision.

Spend time with your husband - real communication is better than on the Internet

Spend more time with your loved ones:

Work, household chores and children are undoubtedly important.
But to maintain a healthy and strong relationship, as well as to add ardor and passion to it, try to devote as much time as possible to your loved one.
Take a walk together, watch a movie, just talk.
In addition, you can arrange a romantic evening where you will be alone. Candles, music, dim lights - all this is not as banal as it seems.
And if you are rarely alone, then this is completely necessary.

Take an interest in your spouse's affairs:

Don't miss a single opportunity, not a single moment to inquire about his mood, well-being, things at work and other things.
These are only trifles and routine at first glance, but in reality this is another piece of attention that you pay to your loved one. And men love and appreciate this very much.

Take care of yourself:

After marriage, many girls stop taking care of their figure and appearance.
They think that now their loved one will not escape from them, because they are connected by marriage.
But if you stop caring for yourself and relax, these bonds will weaken, and this has already been tested over the years.
Therefore, always try to look attractive and beautiful for your chosen one.
He simply cannot help but appreciate your efforts, because all of them are for him.

Read an article on our website on the topic “How to become better than you are?” . It provides advice from cosmetologists, stylists and other specialists.

Don't "attack" for any reason:

When the situation at home is constantly tense and the wife is still “drinking,” no man can tolerate this for long.
Even if you are not in the mood, or your family is experiencing difficulties at the moment, this is not a reason to pour out all your anger on your chosen one.
In this way, you only exhaust him mentally, so his desire to relax on the side would seem quite reasonable.

If something doesn’t suit you, call your husband for a frank conversation. Ask him to change some qualities in himself. At the same time, you, in turn, be more affectionate and patient towards him. After all, both partners must work on the relationship, then all efforts will certainly be crowned with success.

I am corresponding with my husband’s mistress: how to return him to the family?

Corresponding with my husband's mistress
Corresponding with my husband's mistress is the worst and most useless thing you can do. How to return him to his family?

Firstly, she is unlikely to compromise with you. This is an absolutely stranger, an outsider with whom you, in fact, have nothing in common.
Secondly, the problem needs to be solved only together with your husband. If he doesn't want to end this relationship, nothing will work out for you. He must understand and admit his mistake.
His desire to stay in the family is also important.

Then, perhaps (over time or immediately after the conversation), he will come to his senses and make the right decision himself - to stay in the family.

What not to do, can a wife correspond with her ex-husband?

It is better for a wife not to correspond with her ex-husband as revenge.
When a woman finds out that her husband has a pen pal, her sharp reaction is quite reasonable. However, in such a state, you can easily flare up and make a mistake, which can completely ruin the relationship, and even cause divorce. Therefore, remember the steps that you, as a wise woman, should not take when catching your spouse in virtual infidelity. What not to do?

Do not try to take revenge “betrayal for treason”:

Of course, you will be offended to learn that your chosen one acted dishonestly, but do not do the same in retaliation.
Think: could you have cheated if your husband had not done it first?
If not, then your desire to get acquainted with a strange man in order to teach your spouse a lesson is a common offense.
Over time, the emotional storm will subside, but the consequences of your rash decision will remain.
Do you really want to beat yourself up over it later? Hardly.

Don't be humiliated:

Do not write to your rival, and do not beg your spouse to change his mind.
Also, do not promise mountains of gold, do not stoop to requests and vows of all benefits.
This will cause you to lose authority in the eyes of your spouse, and he will understand that he can afford even more base acts towards you.

Don’t make scandals, your husband won’t stop texting.
Hysterics and scandals are taboo:

Remember, it will be much easier for a man to admit his guilt and try to correct the situation if you behave calmly, but speak honestly and frankly.
But if he sees that you are prone to throwing tantrums, he may well turn the situation against you.
He will simply accuse you of the fact that his communication with another woman began precisely because of the lack of calm and constructive dialogue.
Therefore, first calm down completely, and only after that start a conversation. It is likely that you and your husband will be able to find a compromise.

Threatening suicide is unacceptable:

Remember, you are a self-sufficient and adult woman.
And, above all, you should not forget this if you have a child in your marriage with the man you love.
Blackmail and attempts to kill yourself in front of your spouse can push him away from you even more. But that’s not what you’re trying to achieve at all.

Correspondence with ex-husband or boyfriend:

Perhaps you were previously married, or you still have a friendly relationship with an ex-boyfriend.
Do you think that after your husband’s betrayal you can take revenge by starting a correspondence with your ex-boyfriend? Women often wonder: can a wife correspond with her ex-husband? This is a huge mistake, and we've talked about why before.
Such communication will not bring you pleasure or relief.
But it can provoke an even greater conflict, in which case reproaches will already fly in your direction.

The only exception is the situation when you and your “ex” have children together. Then you, whether you like it or not, will have to communicate with him, because he, as a father, must take part in raising children. Otherwise, if you have nothing in common with your ex other than colorful memories, and you don't see him in your life as a friend, you shouldn't take a risky step to improve your self-esteem.

The above actions are categorically unacceptable when clarifying the relationship between spouses in any situation. Whether the issue concerns treason, or whether the conflict arose for another reason, does not matter. Balance and calmness come first.

You deserve more

Friendly relationships, full of mutual understanding and sympathy, have the ability to develop like a romance between a couple in love. Virtual interlocutors are interested in each other's personal lives, look through photos of husbands and wives, and experience some germs of jealousy. “You know, your Fedor is not as good as you wrote about him” ... “Is that blonde on the left your Natalya? You said she was beautiful! ..."

The desire to play a major role in the life of a virtual interlocutor takes over, giving rise to unpleasant dialogues and emotions. Being in a state of complete secrecy, the guy complains about his girlfriend’s shortcomings, and the girlfriend “on the other side of the monitor” expresses grievances about her friend.

What to do if nothing helps: advice from a psychologist

If all else fails, go to a psychologist.
Trying to talk with your husband about his correspondence, be prepared for the fact that your conversations, requests and exhortations may lead to nothing. That is, the spouse is quite capable of continuing communication with your rival. What to do in this case if nothing helps? There are only a few options for the development of events. Here are the advice of psychologists:

ACCEPT THE SITUATION:

Just enduring everything that happens and waiting for it to end is not so bad.
In any case, your husband is with you, he doesn’t go anywhere, and all the money he earns remains in the family.
Perhaps he will soon come to his senses and stop his virtual adventures - you just need to be patient.

GO TO A FAMILY PSYCHOLOGIST:

If you cannot solve the problem yourself, entrust it to a specialist.
Sometimes looking at and assessing the situation from the outside helps solve the situation much better than your own efforts.
Most likely, your chosen one will not want to voluntarily contact a specialist. You will have to persuade and make it clear that the family is collapsing.

Often relationships begin with banal correspondence on the Internet.
BREAK THE RELATIONSHIP:

This is the hardest decision, think about it carefully.
Psychologists advise filing for divorce only if you are not sure that you are able to forgive your husband.
If you think or are sure that you will reproach him for cheating for the rest of your life, then it is really better for you to leave your spouse, since in such an environment real betrayal will become more likely.
Also, a divorce is simply necessary in the case when the husband refuses to admit his misconduct, or he actually had a virtual sexual relationship with a girl (photos, videos, intimate correspondence).

In any case, before making a decision, consulting a family psychologist would not hurt. After all, the divorce process is stressful for both spouses. And if they have a common child or several children, this can negatively affect their psycho-emotional state.

Recommendations for a girl who is worried about her boyfriend

If a guy talks to other girls, what should he do? You can do the following:

Calm down. There is no need to make decisions rashly, this will not lead to anything good.
Find a common hobby or interests.
Talk frankly with your loved one.
To please a guy - cook a romantic dinner, invite him on a date.
5. Start taking care of yourself, change your image, hairstyle, wardrobe, play sports, lose weight.
Explain to the guy that his communication brings pain and anxiety.
Show by example what it’s like when the woman you love communicates with another man.

You can do nothing, but simply wait until the guy gets tired of this communication and he himself returns to his soul mate. But the opposite situation can also happen, when harmless communication turns into betrayal.

My husband constantly corresponds with a man, with a friend: why?

Your husband constantly corresponds with a man, with a friend.
Communication between your husband and his best friend is the least that should worry you. After all, in the end, you also communicate with your close friends and tell them about your most secret things. Men also have their secrets, and they have every right to do so. This is a personal space that even children, not to mention adults, need. This is why a husband may constantly text a friend. But what to do if this bothers your wife?

If you are very interested in what your chosen one is talking about with his friend, you can directly ask him this question.
But remember that you should not try to stop their correspondence, because this will be dishonest towards your husband.
When there is no rival, and there is only a male friend, no matter what they discuss, it is not worth getting involved in it.

It is understandable that you may think that your chosen one and his friend are talking about women. But remember, have you never discussed other men with your friend? If the conversation is truly harmless, your husband may well tell you everything honestly, or even show you the correspondence.

But there are also cases when the correspondence between a man and a man is not so harmless. Some men, unsure of their sexuality, start relationships with women, but then realize that they are drawn to same-sex marriage. In this case, the correspondence will be intimate and the woman can resort to all the advice described above.

Communication between men and women on the Internet does not always imply cheating. Friendship between representatives of both sexes is quite possible, although it is rare. But when the fact of betrayal really exists, do not be afraid to take action. The sooner you take on the problem, the less painful this process will be. Good luck!