How to radically change your life for the better, what you need to do - 3 difficult steps that will change your life

Author of the material:

Alina Tarasova

entrepreneur, writer, life coach

“Create yourself and become a completely different person,” is the thought encountered by those who want to discover an improved version of themselves. Changing your career, adjusting your relationships to a new level, moving from constant games to serious actions - this helps you cope with your own shortcomings. How to change radically if there is no certainty in the future? Why is it important to constantly learn and be honest? What habits ruin your prospects for happiness? Read to the end and you will learn tips that will change your life for the better.

Creating yourself means starting to think about changes and fully immersing yourself in a new environment. When a person contemplates life changes, he instantly resets his mind. Visualization helps to reveal inner desires that you want to strive for. There is no need to chase imposed ideals, but think: “What do I want to do for my own happiness? Why am I not satisfied with my results now?” When life becomes impossible, that’s when the desire to rebuild to a new level arises. It is important to make a list of methods that will help turn your ideas into reality.

“ Create yourself or stay in the same place where you are not happy with everything ,” this rule fills a person with truth. If you want to get a slim body when the scales weigh 150 kg, then you need to strictly adhere to your diet and workouts. Do you dream of developing a strong and confident character? You need to immerse yourself in an unfamiliar environment and be an open person. It all starts with small changes that build a sense of purpose. The Roman Empire was not built in one day, but was formed over centuries. Likewise, a once lazy, pessimistic person can become a model of a happy and successful person.

Take the self-esteem test

Any changes can be presented in the form of a game where ways to solve problems will be presented. First of all, we need to write down all the changes that we think about most often. Then write down all the goals and time frames within which you can confidently say: “Yes, I managed to fulfill what I promised!” It is definitely worth mentioning the day when these ideas will start working. On December 30, it was decided to start reading books on personal growth from January 1. Or “By the end of this month I will sign up for English courses.” Thus, a person commits himself not to shirk responsibility, but to face it face to face.

Motivation helps to reinvent yourself. You can't go anywhere without her! To get even a little closer to the result, you need to want to change the circumstances. This is greatly helped by a positive attitude, which gives rise to strong internal energy. The more a person strives for change and sincerely believes in it, the more effectively he works on himself.

It is important to surround yourself with symbols that are directly associated with plans for the future. Wealth comes to those who are internally ready to receive it and are grateful for any opportunities. You can become an actor if you constantly go to castings, look for valuable contacts and hone your acting skills. In any activity, it is important to keep a personal diary. It only takes a few minutes to write your story for the day. Keeping a chronicle (events over time) allows you to analyze your achievements and become more confident. On the first page you need to write a few reasons called “Reinvent yourself.” They will be the answers to the question: “Why are they so necessary and constantly accompany me?”

Change your thinking model.

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It is impossible to become a new person if you think in the old way. Conventional thinking can be helpful, but some aspects definitely need to change. The journey to a new self is possible if you think positively every day. This will help you avoid a negative scenario and give yourself hope for the best. Many people associate the future with fear, but this is wrong! Worry only closes the individual off from prospects. Vague ideas about the future should fill with inspiration and give sincere faith. Good thoughts are a direct path to confidence, without which you cannot focus on the path to success.

Take the test: optimist or pessimist

The fiery nature of dramatic life changes

Dramatic changes in life are always about the remelting of personality. About the transformation of the fundamentals. But in order to melt yourself, you first need to noticeably stir yourself up. It’s like with metal: to change its shape, you need to heat it up very much. No other way. Frozen, unbending structure. You can break it, but you can’t change it, especially into something beautiful.

With the personality of an adult, which the older, the firmer, something similar happens. For remelting, that is, a real change of internal form, a sufficient amount of fire is necessary.

Such fire can be of different natures. There is an inner fire - your personal efforts and intention of such strength, thanks to which the shackles of former habits and views begin to melt. There is external fire - these are certain events that burn from the outside, requiring certain changes.

Although it would be more accurate to say that dramatic changes are always a story only about inner fire. It’s just that in some cases a person manages to ignite his flame solely on his own, through the power of his own intention and corresponding actions, and in others he “lights up” the “fiery” circumstances. Such circumstances can be very good - for example, strong love, which throws a person into a new rut, and very sad - like illness or betrayal, which also sometimes stimulate one to take off. While some people spend all their strength trying to put out the raging fire in their lives, there will always be those who will kindle an internal fire from an external flame and use its power to transform themselves.

In other words, all conscious changes, those processes that a person consciously forms through intentions and actions, are always about an internal fire of sufficient strength. Only some people have a fire of one strength or another - these are active people by nature, while others, in order to achieve even minor progress for the better, need to warm themselves up considerably. But in order to create themselves anew, both the first and the second need a strong, stable flame, which is rarely found “by default.” Usually, everyone requires significant effort to ignite it.

And here several nuances immediately arise. All highly effective approaches to change and corresponding transformational practices have a warming, melting, and thereby shaking effect. You can swing your construction in such a way that, at best, you will float with your ego and imagine yourself as someone you are not and “understand” what you do not understand. Nowadays there are many such “masters”. But this is still a good outcome. Bad - health problems and difficulties in relationships with other people, up to complete loss of contact with reality.

Melting down a personality is not a safe thing. But it’s impossible without such a build-up, without internal intensity. Nothing will work out. The personality structure will remain the same, which means that the changes will only be superficial and insignificant. The scenery changes, but the essence remains the same.

When they say that courage is the basis of real change, they mean precisely this courage - to remelt your personality. And not the courage to jump over a deep ravine or quit a job you don’t like.

A natural question arises.

So how can you ignite your inner fire and melt everything that makes up and surrounds you into a new magnificent form?

AND IF THERE IS GUNDOW POWER, GIVE FIRE

High methods

Firstly, there are so-called specialized methods. Practices created specifically for personality transformation. These are, of course, yoga practices. Systems of exercises with the body, breathing and attention aimed at raising internal fire and transforming both the body and mind of a person. In fact, all hatha yoga (and these are all types of modern yoga for working with the body) and pranayama are exactly about this. Voila. Use it.

But it's not that simple. And, I would even say, everything is very complicated in this matter, alas.

The fact is that yoga, just as it was a closed, largely secret practice throughout its many-thousand-year history, remains so to this day.

In the 20th century, these methods were opened to the general public, but they did not become open. The reason was the simplification of the process, when yoga, from a system for the deep transformation of human nature, suddenly became therapeutic and became widespread as a “remedy for a bad back.”

The popularity of the side effect also led to fundamental changes in the structure, behind which the true meaning ceased to be visible. Today, yoga is a means for alignment, stretching, getting rid of problems with the spine, a method of relaxation, cheerfulness in the morning and a way to stay fit, but it is no longer a story about a complete melting of the mind and body.

The first stages of yoga - yama and niyama (standards of morality and purity of behavior) were pointedly discarded. The pinnacle of practice - the most complex techniques of concentration and meditation, designed to perform a serious operation on the human mind - has been simplified to “five minutes a day is enough.” And it all came down to getting rid of stress and, again, a sore back that needed to be treated after endless sitting in front of the monitor.

The practice has changed, and so have the teachers. Today, to find a yoga teacher who not only mixes a sequence of poses and pranayamas that he was taught in short-term courses, but also conceptualizes yoga as a complex system, with the help of a variety of tools that can either revive a person or burn him on his own fire , - you need to try hard.

But this is not a reason not to be interested in these practices in their true meaning. Against. All their power was relevant and remains to this day. According to my observations, for constant practice and in-depth study of the issue, it makes sense to choose teachers from the old school, especially at the first stage, while your experience is not enough for quality conclusions. Those who began their personal practice 15-20 years ago or more, before the widespread spread of social networks and the loud hum of information flow on the Internet. In those days, it was still necessary to work hard just to find an acceptable practice and not give it up, and there were many times fewer distortions of the essence. As a rule, the foundation of such teachers is more solid and the transmission of meaning is purer.

Old-fashioned way

In principle, any cardio is about igniting the inner fire. Running is a perfect example. And it was by running that at one time I relieved apathy, laziness and old habits that had been ingrained in my body since early childhood. Cardio literally disinhibits and warms you up. Add to this a strong desire for qualitative changes - and you will see them.

For everyone who lacks activity, drive, courage and big joyful changes, this is a simple tool to start your own refining. But this method is clumsy. Unable to precisely polish fine edges and penetrate into the deep layers of your being. For the first stages of conscious changes - excellent, but for more complex adjustments of your own structure and the transition to the next levels of interaction with your body and psyche, you will need something more serious, like yoga, pranayama and meditation.

External shake-up

Change is a story about inner fire. But, as I already mentioned, sometimes it can be started from an external fire. So, you can also arrange this external fire yourself.

Moving to another city or country, long months of travel, long strict retreats. Even dismissal. But as part of the meltdown, and not as the final destination. Such radical steps noticeably heat up the space around you, softening the former forms of your states and surrounding meanings.

At one time, without yet reflecting on all these processes, I discovered at random the transformational power of moving. When you move, especially alone, to another city, or better yet to another country, all your old attitudes and norms begin to “float”. This is a very interesting, although not painless, stage. It lasts no more than a year, and if you use this correctly, “Mommy, everything is on fire,” “I’m nobody and you can’t call me,” then you can turn things around.

I made six full-fledged moves to a new permanent place of residence until it dawned on me that the fire must be lit and maintained from the inside, and not just lighted by circumstances. Although, in fairness, we must admit: there was an effect. The last major move, when I headed to Moscow alone, where I had no one and nothing, from the warm and well-fed island of Bali, I did on purpose. I deliberately planned to “smoke”, because Moscow is such a city that will give anyone the heat to the fullest. And so it happened. True, then I finally started running. The external is always finite, and only internal changes and stable internal fire can provide stable support.

And today, 7 years later, I no longer run, but do yoga, studying its tools. Running just increases the fire, that's all. And then to a certain limit. Yoga works brilliantly: it can seriously heat you up, or it can put everything out and cool it down. It can give a thin stream of light and warmth, or it can raise a flame of any strength (including much stronger than from running). With the help of her arsenal, the internal fire can be adjusted and directed precisely.

But let's return to the external shake-up. This method will only work if you can “light up”, that is, correctly direct your intentions and actions, putting all your strength into this process. Otherwise, there will be a fire in life and its consequences, but your transformation will not.

YOU CAN'T MELT YOURSELF TO INFINITY

Need a form.

It is the essence, not the fire itself.

Where am I going? For what? What do I want? What am I striving for? In the name of what?

These are not just goals. This is a vision of the final image of the result. Directing your impulse - both through the power of intention and direct active actions.

Otherwise, in place of the personality there will remain a molten mass. The fire will do its job, everything else will depend on you.

And you may have seen such people. Practices and experiments with their lives make them weaker: it becomes difficult for them to communicate with people who do not share their views; they become less and less mentally stable; more and more “fly away” into esoteric theories, completely breaking away from the ground.

Practices melt - man molds. Yes, relying on instructors and coaches, but taking your direct part in this process. And bears full responsibility for the result.

OR IS IT STILL ON SLOW FIRE?

Fire is like a knife. Useful and dangerous at the same time, it depends on your hands. It can melt, or it can incinerate. Leave only dirty coals in the place of your former life.

In yoga, for example, there are the following restrictions for advanced practices - firstly, you must have a strong enough guide. That is, a moderately strong physical body and a balanced mind. You can release “electricity” through your own channels only if you have sufficient stability for this.

If there is an illness, and especially various intense mental states, you cannot do such things, it is actually unsafe, and not only for the body, but, more importantly, for the psyche. The same goes for other intensive approaches. Going for a conscious increase in internal fire from unstable states is more expensive for yourself. In Ayurveda, for example, in conditions of increased mobility of the nervous system, running is contraindicated. Running will perfectly incinerate and cure any melancholy melancholy, but it will only aggravate internal loosening. In this case, you need to act in stages: first restoration, then strengthening and only then fire, starting with a small flame (my path in this matter is described here).

But exactly at this moment the scythe hits the stone. Show me a person who is seriously interested in big changes from a well-fed and contented life? There are only a few people who clearly understand that if you don’t change yourself, life will change you. Mostly people come to the topic of personal change only out of pain, out of strong personal dissatisfaction.

Yes, sometimes fire heals such conditions, especially popular ones, everything is good, but nothing good when a person suffers from not realizing his potential. Then fire is a faithful assistant. But if your crack is of a different nature, if something inside has begun to loosen, then you can unsuccessfully fry yourself. History, as a rule, does not store such examples, but this does not mean that there are not enough of them.

Most often, from 20 to 28 years old you can allow yourself “more fire.” This is the age of experiments, including dangerous ones. The body and mind are still plastic, internal processes have not yet settled down. Plus high natural adaptability and healing of wounds, including psychological ones. With big reservations, of course, but in general this is a period when you can “fry” without really looking around.

After 30 years, this ability begins to gradually decline. Between 30 and 40 comes a period when most people hit their first adult bumps, believing themselves to be stronger than they actually are. Become familiar with personal limits. But globally, this is a good process, because without groping for such boundaries on one age-gay, who dominates at 20, truly large mountains of personal achievements cannot be overcome. And only after making a couple of mistakes does a person become truly effective - he begins to unmistakably distinguish between the blues, which should be easily discarded and add even more fire, from the harbinger of mental or physical exhaustion, when you need to put all ambitions aside, cool yourself down as much as possible and devote yourself to time for quality restoration. The moves of such a person become more accurate, and the fire becomes more controllable. He knows when and how to make the next leap to new horizons, and when it’s worth just maintaining a small flame in order to keep warm without major achievements, but also without losing the taste for life.

BUT STILL

In the matter of conscious changes (namely, conscious changes), it is impossible to do without refining.

Although many are trying.

These are the famous attempts to leave the comfort zone without discomfort, retreats without stress, yoga without spiritual work and the desire for change without the desire to change anything. There's nothing wrong with that, actually. A sore back, however, needs to be supported with something, and some asanas contribute well to this; Relieving stress in some beautiful place will also not be superfluous, and even very useful. It’s just that fundamental changes are not achieved this way, that’s all.

♥

Olesya Vlasova

Author of the blog Re-self.ru, co-founder of the project Come Back to Others and aspiring builder of a retreat center in Sumbawa

PS Friends! You can get acquainted with my personal collection of sources on the topic of physics and metaphysics of conscious changes (what I inspire myself and what I recommend to you) at this link. The result was 33 books, 23 articles, 10 websites, 9 films, 8 videos + some personal stuff.

Interact with people around you.

Others are drawn to open people. Reinventing yourself means connecting with different people, regardless of their social status. Helping others, especially charity, helps you work on your own selfishness. It is he who prevents us from seeing the world more openly, but only from the angle of one person. Tell a loved one about your feelings, support a passerby who is in trouble, help a lady carry heavy bags - kind things attract the best changes in your personal life. Why not go clean up the park this Saturday and get others involved in a good deed?

What is the correct spelling: “cardinally”, “coordinately” or “cardinally”?

The only correct form of the adverb, recorded in modern dictionaries, with the letter “a” in the first syllable is “cardinally”.

Often the vowel “a” is mistakenly replaced with one or two “o”. This phenomenon is explained simply: in the Russian language there are similar-sounding nouns “coordinates” and the verb “coordinate” (we pronounce “o” and write “oo”). However, these lexemes have different origins and meanings, which means that it is illiterate to confuse their spelling.

The analyzed adverb is of foreign origin, so it will not be possible to find words with the same root for it to check the unstressed vowel. It is recommended to memorize the spelling of this lexeme or check it in a dictionary.

Strengthen a healthy spirit.

There can be no rational thinking without the absence of good health. Proper nutrition and active exercise will help you tone yourself up. Feeling sad? All you have to do is go for a walk! Do you want to brighten up your boring everyday life? You can buy a plane/train ticket and go to an unfamiliar city. In your free time from work, you can do healthy yoga and ride a bike. How to change your style and radically change your appearance? Spend just 10-20 minutes on morning exercises. This will give you a supply of energy and give you confidence. How can I give up my favorite fast food? If you don’t want to have problems with excess weight, unpleasant symptoms of weakness, etc. - replace it with natural products. What helps reduce stress in life is not overeating and getting enough activity!

You can't remember the last time you felt happy

When was the last time you experienced true happiness? Or do you wake up every day and follow a familiar routine that brings no pleasure? Are you doing everything you can to just make it through another day, to make it to the end of another work shift?

You deserve happiness. If your current life circumstances are not conducive to this, recognize that you need to change something. This is the first step to a better life, take it.

Constantly receive education.

Successful people who enjoy success today never stop learning. There is nothing better for the strongest muscle (brain) than training it. You can create a new yourself through progress in consciousness. How can you become a well-rounded person with whom it is interesting to talk to both a scientist and a businessman? Don't lose interest in knowledge! This leads to the “read every day!” rule. You should pay attention not to thoughtless glossy magazines with columns about stars, but to more meaningful literature. You can form a sober mind that does not get distracted by trifles with the help of expert information. Education refers not only to the sciences, but also to travel. Language is man’s best friend, which can always be used! Interesting fact: highly paid professions are associated with knowledge of foreign languages ​​and periodic trips around countries.

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Conclusion

• The desire to change yourself is quite natural. At the same time, there is no one algorithm that can be useful to all people during a period of change. It is extremely important to carry out all procedures gradually and in no case compare yourself with those people who have already achieved success, because such a comparison will in no case be in your favor.
• It is worth further studying the full list of recommendations, which will significantly speed up all work. Contact specialists to find out how to do this better, and the specialists can be psychoanalysts, coaches or people who have already achieved success. And remember, the main thing in this matter is to believe in yourself.

Learn from experienced people.

1 in 10 people are a valuable source of information worth listening to. Sometimes one conversation is enough for us to receive important information. It’s possible to achieve your goal if you don’t be closed off from others. Admitting your ignorance is halfway to acquiring the necessary skills. A friend works as a chef, but your dream of cooking delicious food persists? It’s worth asking his crown secrets of the most delicious stew! Just arrived at work and your colleague is thriving in his career? There's nothing wrong with asking for work advice. Older peers can point out things they wouldn't do at your age. When there are more questions than answers, knowledgeable people can help like no one else!

Adverb and Problem Solving

People are not always inclined to cut headlong and solve problems radically, this is understandable, but still, when something like this happens, it means there is no turning back. Let's imagine two situations. In the first, the girl doesn’t know what to wear on her next date and burns her entire wardrobe in despair. Moreover, let the reader decide for himself what he likes better: a fire that engulfed the entire house, or a quiet, peaceful fire in the yard.

The advantage of such an act is obvious - you no longer need to be tormented by doubts. But there are much more disadvantages: basically nothing to wear, expenses for new clothes, even if we assume that the girl is wealthy and not strapped for money, again time for shopping.

Hence the moral conclusion: the worst thing about a radical solution to any problem is irrevocability. But sometimes contradictions are insoluble, and nerves are on edge, so it seems that there is simply no other way out.

The second situation affects not material, but psychological reality. Let's imagine a married couple. People once loved each other, but now mutual understanding has disappeared. Let's say that all the therapists have been completed, the trainings and conversations did not bring any results. There is only one remedy left - to separate. That's what they do. No one is tormented by conscience, because sometimes parting is better.

We have given two examples. In the first, sudden movements are recklessness, and in the second, they are the only means of salvation.

Be able to focus on what is important.

The laser focuses precisely on the target and penetrates it. Also a person who focuses on ideas. The greatest productivity can be achieved if you do not pay attention to the little things. An environment where there are no irritants will help you immerse yourself in work. Just as files on a computer have their place, thoughts should not be chaotic. There's an important task hanging over your head—now is not the time to look at celebrity photos on Instagram! The exam is tomorrow, but I'm tempted to watch a show on TV - bad idea! You can be allowed to rest if you work enough.

Step-by-step algorithm for changing yourself

A step-by-step algorithm that will allow you to change yourself is as follows:

1. Determine your own motives. You need to think carefully about the reasons that will allow you to radically find all the interesting options faster.
2. Analyze all the important events in your own life. It is important to add all the interesting solutions.
3. Critically evaluate the past. Often, to successfully improve your life in the present, you will need to give up part of the past. You may have previously been accustomed to ignoring problems or conflicts, but at the moment you should not behave this way.
4. Reevaluate your own scale of values . This is the most important advice that can solve all problems that arise. In some cases, a much better idea is to start with some soul searching.
5. Determine the amount of change you need to make. For some people, starting a new life may be a change of place of residence, and for some, a radical restructuring of themselves.
6. Constantly practice working on yourself. Visualize all actions for yourself.
7. Set all your goals.
8. Start the change. Determine the scope of changes, create plans, deal with the baggage of unnecessary emotions.
9. Think about an effective change of scenery and conduct an audit of your environment.
10. Get your relationships in order.
11. Deal with financial problems , evaluate unnecessary expenses and get rid of them.
12. Move to a better job .
13. Get support .
14. Try to constantly monitor your progress .
15. Adapt to the changes that have occurred.
16. Contact specialists .