Troubled emotions experienced by a person who regrets past actions.
This article is about emotions.
For an episode of the series residential building, see Repentance (House). Repentance Orestes
(1862), by William-Adolphe Bouguereau
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Remorse
grieving is an emotion experienced by a person who regrets actions they have committed in the past[1] that they consider shameful, offensive, or wrong. Remorse is closely related to guilt and self-resentment. When a person regrets a previous action or inaction, it may be out of remorse or in response to various other consequences, including punishment for the action or inaction. People may express remorse by apologizing, trying to make amends for the harm they have caused, or imposing punishments themselves.
In a legal context, perceived offender remorse is assessed by Western justice systems during trials, sentencing, parole hearings, and restorative justice. However, there are epistemological problems with assessing a criminal's level of remorse.[2]
A person who is unable to repent is often diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, as described in DSM IV-TR. In general, a person needs to feel fear as well as remorse in order to develop psychopathic traits. Legal and business professions such as insurance have conducted research into expressing remorse through an apology, primarily due to the potential for litigation and financial implications.
Research on apologies
Two studies on apologies are The Five Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas.[3] and “On Apologies” by Aaron Lazar.[4] These studies suggest that effective apologies expressing remorse typically include a detailed account of the wrongdoing; recognition of harm or damage caused; accepting responsibility and ownership for acts or omissions; an explanation that acknowledges its role. Additionally, apologies typically include a statement or expression of regret, humility, or remorse; request for forgiveness; and expressing a credible commitment to change or a promise that it will not happen again. An apology may also include some form of restitution, compensation, or symbolic gesture in accordance with the harm caused. John Kleefeld summed it up in the "four rupees" that typically presuppose a fully effective apology: remorse, responsibility, resolution, and reparation.[5] When an apology is delayed, such as when a friend was wronged and the offender did not apologize, the perception of the offense may worsen over time. This is sometimes called repentance. Remorse refers to the act of actively expressing remorse, usually requiring the repentant person to physically approach the person to whom he is expressing regret.
How to deal with pangs of conscience?
It turns out that you don’t even have to listen to the so-called voice of reason, ignore it. Our brain does this in some cases. For example, when a person’s head has thoughts more important than self-flagellation about this or that curiosity. How to get rid of pangs of conscience? You just need to learn to respect yourself. After all, if a person has low self-esteem, he will be afraid of doing something wrong. Consequently, the individual will constantly involuntarily remind himself of the punctures.
Some have a tendency to invent false excuses for themselves, which, in their opinion, could save them from remorse. But it was not there! After all, those who look for excuses are never right in the end. Therefore, you need to exclude the invention of reasons for innocence and properly scold yourself for what you have done.
Falsified Expressions
In a study conducted by Leanne ten Brinke, a professor at the University of British Columbia, participants' real and fake emotions were studied to examine behavioral and facial cues. Brinke et al found a significant difference in facial expression between real and false remorse. With falsified emotions of remorse, they found that participants experienced a wider range of emotions closer to genuine feelings, while deceptive accounts of remorse were associated with positive emotions such as happiness and surprise.[6] The positive emotions experienced by participants demonstrating a deceptive description of remorse are likely due to the leakage of true feelings due to incomplete deception. Brinke and others found that participants appeared surprised because they could only raise their eyebrows in an attempt to appear sad, which then made the participants feel embarrassed, feel genuinely happy, and allow them to smile.[6] In contrast to the deceptive and falsified stories, the genuine stories were expressed with less emotion. Participants displaying deceptive or falsified emotions overcompensated for their emotional characteristics. The genuine negative feelings of remorse leaking from the lower part of the face were immediately covered up by a neutral expression. Brinke recorded a small amount of body language and verbal cues for deceptive participants; instead, she recorded a large number of speech fluctuations, which gave rise to false and falsified reports of repentance.[6] Current findings on deceptive and falsified remorse have practical implications for measuring the veracity of remorse by judges, juries, parole officers, and psychologists when sentencing criminals.
Psychopathy
Main article: Psychopathy
Psychopaths are known for their blatant disregard for social and moral norms. Psychopaths have dysfunctional personal relationships characterized by violence, exploitation, and depravity. Emotionally, they are incapable of feeling guilt or empathy, they react abnormally to fear and pain, and other emotions are superficial compared to the population norm.[7] Psychopaths refuse to accept social and moral norms because they are not influenced by emotions such as guilt, remorse, or fear of retribution that affect other people.[7]
Human societies tend to value repentance; conversely, a person who shows no remorse is often perceived in a negative light. It is widely accepted that repentance is the right response to wrongdoing. Remorse can be caused by either real or imagined regret for the wrongdoing that resulted in getting caught or causing harm.[8] Research has shown that the facial expressions of defendants in court influence jurors' attitudes and, in turn, their verdict. While remorse can represent a feeling of guilt that can influence a jury's decision, lack of remorse influences the jury even more because it is a feature of psychopathy.
Psychopathy is a set of traits that are missing from a person's personality, such as lack of empathy and remorse. Knowledge of psychopathic traits has been shown to influence how jurors perceive adult and juvenile offenders. Psychopathy assessments are introduced to address a relatively wide range of issues in the legal system, so researchers have begun to study the effects of evidence of psychopathy.[9] Through modeling research by John Edens, a psychology professor at Texas A&M University, evidence suggests that attributing psychopathic traits to adult and juvenile offenders can have a noticeable negative effect on how these individuals are viewed by others.[9] Ruthlessness, a key feature of psychopathy, appears to be a strong predictor of juror attitudes.[9] In John Edens' study, a group of offenders was labeled as having a "disorder" or "no disorder." Those who were described as "riots" were sentenced to death by the jury.[9] In the study, traits such as callousness, ruthlessness, and superficial charm were strong predictors of negative outcomes for offenders. This study found that ruthlessness had the greatest influence on the opinions of mock "riot" jurors and explained support for the death sentence.[9] The results of this study suggest that without mental health testimony, perceptions of a defendant's personality traits can have significant implications for sentencing in capital cases.[9]
And literary heroes have a conscience...
Pangs of conscience in the fate of famous literary heroes are a fairly common occurrence. Many of them, to one degree or another, thought about the correctness of their actions, made excuses to themselves, or continued to gnaw at themselves. Raskolnikov is rightfully considered the most conscientious character in Russian literature. One has only to remember how at first he was delusional that they wanted to capture him, imprison him, and convict him. The hero wasn't even ashamed. Like, the old woman-pawnbroker is to blame herself. Raskolnikov did not consider himself a “trembling creature.” He assured himself that he “has the right” to kill those who allegedly interfere with the lives of decent people. But after what happened, everything changed. The pangs of conscience drove him into a corner to such an extent that he literally began to go crazy. And he did not calm down until he received what he deserved for killing the old woman.
Anna Karenina is another conscientious heroine. But she reproached herself not for murder, but for betraying her husband. The woman chose her own punishment - she threw herself under a train.
Thus, in their works based on psychologism, the authors show what a terrible thing conscience is. Her reproaches can drive you crazy and lead to suicide. Therefore, there is no need to commit those actions for which you would be painfully ashamed.
Forgiveness
The perception of remorse is necessary for an apology, and the stronger the feeling of remorse, the more effective the apology. An effective apology reduces negative consequences and promotes cognitive and behavioral changes associated with forgiveness.[10] With empathy as a mediator between apology and forgiveness and remorse as an essential part of apology, empathy can be expected to mediate perceived forgiveness of remorse. Remorse may signal that a person is suffering psychologically due to their negative behavior, leading to empathy from the victim, who may then express forgiveness.[10] In a study by James Davis and Greg Gold, 170 university students completed questionnaires about forgiveness in interpersonal relationships. Davis and Gold's findings suggest that when a victim perceives an apology as remorse, she believes the negative behavior will not happen again and is more willing to forgive the perpetrator.[10]
Objective assessment
When pangs of conscience interfere with life, you need to understand the reasons for this.
Often even the slightest offense in especially conscientious people causes a violent reaction. Although conscience is the voice of internal morality, it should not be the main one, and blindly following it is a common mistake. Still, conscience touches on some moments from the past, which, unfortunately, cannot be changed. Constantly returning to his past, a person prevents himself from building a future. In general, it is worth remembering that a suddenly awakened conscience is even a good sign. A sign that a person has not yet lost something good, bright and eternal.
Against self-condemnation
Repentance is closely related to the willingness to accept and repent of one's wrongdoings. Repentance is not in itself when it is defined through self-condemnation.[11] Self-judgment, more than remorse, is said to be associated with poor psychological well-being. Regret reflects feelings of guilt, regret and sadness. Forgiveness does not eliminate all negative feelings, but it can lead to a decrease in bitter and angry feelings, but not feelings of disappointment, regret, or sadness. Mika Fisher's research has shown that people who forgive themselves for serious transgressions may continue to experience remorse or regret.[11] Unlike repentance, self-condemnation reflects a more global, negative, harsh attitude towards oneself. Remorse may express feelings of sadness, while self-judgment involves the disgust and desire for punishment that characterize interpersonal offenses. Fisher suggests that self-forgiveness does not necessarily require letting go of feelings, regret, or remorse.[11] According to Fisher's research, self-forgiveness seems to be more associated with self-judgment rather than remorse. When trying to persuade people to forgive themselves, it is critical not to blur potentially adaptive feelings of remorse along with more destructive self-judgment.[11] People can grow and experience prosocial behavior if they accept responsibility for their wrongdoings. For true self-forgiveness, you must first accept responsibility for your grievances, and not rush to get rid of guilt.
What it is
An amazing property of human consciousness is conscientiousness. It cannot be touched, it cannot be bought or sold, it cannot be given as a gift, but it exists. She can be seen by others, she can sleep peacefully or torment a person.
Some consider conscience to be a useless attribute or an atavism. After all, such an “accessory” only interferes with normal life activities and prevents you from “getting high” from being. Conscientiousness seems to gnaw at a person’s soul from the inside; he cannot let go of his own wrongdoing; he is tormented by a feeling of guilt, which is much worse than the reproaches of the surrounding society. The words of strangers can easily be ignored, but the voice of conscience cannot be drowned out.
Therefore, the expression of remorse should be understood as a kind of means of self-control, like an inner voice extinguishing that since you have messed things up, it would be nice to correct them, otherwise it will be worse.
Thus, pangs of conscience are the mental discomfort that any individual experiences after causing an offense, committing a bad act, or insulting someone. The sufferer gives himself an assessment of his own actions or thoughts. If actions go against one’s own internal censor, the result is mental discomfort.
All unpleasant experiences, as well as remorse, are usually provoked either by a discrepancy in one’s own eyes between existing moral principles and the actions taken, or by the anticipation of unpleasant educational “acts” on the part of censure and condemnation. After all, everyone wants to consider themselves a worthy person, everyone likes to think well of themselves.
Mental anguish is directly proportional to the virtues that are instilled in a person and are alive in him, and not to human vices.
Thus, human subjects may feel remorse as a result of an act committed, a word spoken, or even a thought, but this is inherent in an adult, mature personality.
Buyer's remorse
Main article: Buyer's remorse
Shopping can be divided into two different categories: tangible and experiential. A tangible product is meant to remain in the buyer's possession, while an experiential product provides the buyer with a life experience. A tangible product provides the buyer with more lasting pleasure than an experience, since the two purchases also lead to different types of regret.[12] While experiential purchases cause regret about a missed opportunity, material purchases cause buyer's remorse, which means that a person thinks about how his material purchase compares to other purchases he could have made and how it compares to other people's purchases . These comparisons reduce satisfaction from the original goal.[12] Previous research explains that regrets about actions are strong, but only in the short term, while regrets about inaction grow stronger over time and dominate people's experiences. Major life choices such as marriage, work, and education are often regrettable. Everyday experience suggests that everyday decisions are the most common cause of regret.[12] CMOs are aware of the consequences of buyer's remorse and use them to their advantage when planning marketing strategies. Regret about choosing a material instead of buying it from your own experience depends on the painful factors underlying the purchase. According to research by Thomas Gilovich and Emily Rosenzwig, material purchases are more likely to cause regret, while experiential purchases bring greater satisfaction to the buyer, even over time.[12]
Why are people tormented by their conscience?
If conscience is a tool for self-control and evaluation of one’s actions, then it is precisely it that helps a person realize that one of the actions he has committed does not correspond to his concept of morality. The individual arranges a trial of himself and pronounces a sentence on himself. In this case, it all depends on character traits. Someone, even having committed an objectively negative act, will not worry about this for long and his moral torment will quickly fade away.
Others, on the contrary, tend to dramatize. They deliberately screw themselves up and mentally inflate the scale of their mistake. Moral torment gradually develops into depression and a feeling of self-hatred.
Recommendations
- remorse, Cambridge Dictionary.
- O'Hear, Michael M. (1996–1997), Remorse, Cooperation, and Acceptance of Responsibility: The Structure, Implementation, and Reform of Section 3E1.1 of the Federal Sentencing Guidelines
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91
, Nw. UL Rev., p. 1507, archived from the original 12/18/2013 - Gary Chapman, Jennifer Thomas (2006). Five languages of apology. Capricious. ISBN 1-881273-57-1. See also Gary Chapman (2007). Now you speak my language: honest communication and deeper intimacy for a stronger marriage. B&H. ISBN 978-0-8054-4460-5.
- Aaron Lazar (2004). About apologies. New York: Oxford University Press. ISBN 978-0-1951-7343-7.
- John Kleefeld (2007). “Thinking Like a Human Being: British Columbia Apology Law,
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McDonald, S; and others. (2012), "Crocodile Tears: Facial, Verbal Behavior, and Body Language Associated with Genuine and Fabricated Remorse", Law and Human Behavior
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Maybom, H (2005), "Moral unreasonableness: the case of psychopathy",
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Why does your conscience gnaw at you?
It is absolutely clear that we experience regret after we commit an offense and until we hear the cherished: “I forgive you.” But why does a person need to justify himself to himself? Why can’t you just forget about the conflict as a bad dream and not fill your head with all sorts of nonsense? Everything is easily explained: pangs of conscience are not excuses that we invent for ourselves in order to calm down. We are talking about responsibility towards those who were offended.
The human brain is designed in such a way that it needs to be convinced of everything, even that its “master” is right. Therefore, thoughts about what happened are nothing more than a way to get rid of annoying and sometimes boring reproaches of conscience. Unfortunately, you can’t save yourself by making excuses and looking for evidence of your own innocence.
