Apathy, if we translate the term literally, is a lack of feelings, interest or any reaction to specific situations or life in general. Many people may experience short periods of apathy at some points in their lives, a state that is described as indifference to current events or unwillingness to do anything. But in a medical sense, this problem is considered a long-term syndrome.
Apathy is usually associated with certain mental conditions or disorders. Specific symptoms of apathy include:
- absence or severe suppression of emotions, feelings, anxiety or passion;
- lack of motivation (no desire to do anything or complete what you started), weakened willpower;
- lack of meaning or purpose in one’s actions, but unlike depression, there is no feeling of uselessness and hopelessness, there is simply no desire, no intention to say, do or react in any way;
- slowness, very low energy levels and passivity;
- detachment from life and personal events - this is especially common in people with dementia.
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), optimal health is a state in which the potential for physical, mental and emotional growth is maximized. Thus, apathy does not meet the WHO definition of optimal health.
You try to please everyone but yourself
Reason #1 is when you start doing things that go against your own interests, in favor of other people's interests, under their pressure, or out of false altruism. At the same time, you are steadily destroying your life. And at some point you burn out or break down so much that you understand: there is no life left in your life, you no longer want anything, and you have nothing to strive for. You have long forgotten how to hear your own needs and want...
You can say that you were taught from childhood that thinking only about yourself is bad manners. And good form is to sacrifice one’s interests in favor of the interests of “one’s neighbor.” Yes it is. However, suicide is also a great sin. And by destroying your life, you are essentially doing just that. Because everything is good in moderation. It is important and necessary to be able to think and care about other people, but in no case should you neglect your life and derail it. Everything needs harmony.
What to do? If you already know what you would like to do in life if no one pressured you, begin to gradually introduce your interest into life - this is the first thing. Second: slowly increase the time you devote to it, build up your skills, your expertise. Third: tell as many people as possible about it. Fourth: over time, you will have clients who want you to provide them with a service, and, as a result, decent income. Fifth: after this, you will be able to make your favorite business your main one and do it full time. In other words, your hobby will develop into skill, and skill into professionalism.
If you don’t yet know what to devote your life to, start with the preparatory work. Namely: start observing yourself. What do you devote your free time to, what news do you read, what do you follow on the Internet and social networks, etc. That is, what the vector of your attention is directed to. This way you can notice what you like. Then feel free to follow the algorithm described above.
And remember: energy, strength for work, for accomplishments can only be found in what comes from the soul and touches the living. What you are willing to do even seven days a week and for free. When you find such a thing, you will certainly feel a surge of enthusiasm. Now work with this.
To survive in your old occupation (while you are looking for something you love and growing in it as a professional), try to find at least something in it that is truly interesting and dear to you. And if it can become a springboard to a new business, ease the transition to it, and allow you to gain some experience, even better. Be sure to look for such a connection.
How to quickly overcome apathy?
The period of recovery from a state of detachment or apathy depends, first of all, on the character of the patient himself. If he is an ambitious perfectionist, then trying to overcome his lack of interest in something through willpower can only make the situation worse. Apathy should be positioned as a short pause in life, even if it means turning to a psychotherapist for help.
And at this moment it’s worth taking a break from work, maybe it’s worth taking a vacation for a few days.
It is necessary to leave things alone for a while and reduce the time you spend communicating with others.
Under no circumstances should you take any medications, such as antidepressants or sedatives, or vice versa, stimulants, without a doctor’s recommendation!
Alcohol is also not the best ally; it will aggravate your condition, which is already not the best. At the time of taking it, your mood may be somewhat better, but after that, the “bar” of your condition will be somewhat lower than it was before taking alcohol.
The best thing in this state is to get some sleep and drink green tea with chocolate (preferably dark, natural chocolate). After all, the substances included in their composition will give you vital energy. To understand what caused apathy and how to overcome it, it is important to choose the most appropriate method of psychoanalysis in this case. Only in this case will the treatment have an effect. And among the methods of treating apathy that you can use yourself are physical activity, maximum vitamins, massage, water exercises and, of course, relaxation. And if this does not help, then a visit to a psychotherapist is mandatory.
You are afraid to defend your interests
Reason No. 2 is the fear of confrontation, conflicts and, at the same time, the not always conscious desire not to offend anyone, to please everyone, to be good to everyone. Such behavior may be dictated by the instinct of self-preservation, the fear of death. The cause-and-effect chain here goes like this. If you don’t do as someone asks, or you don’t do it well enough (that is, you won’t please, you’ll disappoint) - you’ll cause anger, displeasure - anger will cause rejection - the consequence of rejection will be rejection, expulsion - and expulsion is tantamount to death. This is where the instinct of self-preservation kicks in. And it forces you to seek the affections of other people at any cost, even to the detriment of yourself and your life.
What to do? Expand your boundaries millimeter by millimeter. Where it is safe for you to make a decision on your own right now or insist on it, do so. Although this will be uncomfortable for you at first, because you are not in the habit of acting based on your own interests. Every time you are able to make your decision and follow through on it, immerse yourself in the feeling each small victory will give you. Enjoy them to the fullest, “imprint” them into your body so that it remembers this high well and strives to experience it at every opportunity. Including when solving more complex problems. Because the more difficult the victory, the brighter and more complete the pleasure from it.
Many people who are accustomed to pulling the blanket solely on themselves, ignoring your interests, will fall away from you. Don’t worry too much about this: the fewer such people around you and the more people who respect not only their own needs, but also yours, the higher the quality of your life will be. Moreover, such separations are to your advantage: in this way you will weed out people who do not have any warm feelings for you, but simply use you for their own purposes. But we will talk about this in more detail later.
Your environment is holding you back
Reason #3 is the “quality” of your immediate environment , with which you are in close contact every day and which has a great influence on you. We are talking about people who have stopped in their development, want nothing and do not strive for anything, and who do not believe in themselves or in you and are dragging you down with them into a “stagnant and musty swamp.” Since they are afraid to express themselves in something, they are afraid to have their own opinion and even more so to express it, they are afraid to Do something and take responsibility for their actions, they will intimidate you in every possible way and dissuade you from making bold decisions and taking responsibility for your actions. result. They will try to put the thickest and strongest chains on you and tightly chain you “to a damp concrete wall in some remote basement,” in which you will remain forever (it’s like a horror movie). Because of this, nothing will ever change in your life, which means you will not be able to disturb their familiar world, you will not be able to destroy it. And if you live in a tiny shell, tightly closed from everything and everyone, if your every next day is similar to every previous one, then it won’t even occur to you to wish for something or dream about something. This is absolutely impossible.
What to do? Gradually change your environment. Anyone you can break up with immediately, without adverse consequences for yourself, break up immediately. Do not answer the phone at all or end the conversation as quickly as possible under any plausible pretext. Do not respond to e-mails and messages in instant messengers, or answer dryly and in the most general words. Your task is to make the person lose the desire to contact you with anything.
If you are restrained and limited by your close people (often these are your parents), with whom you cannot break off relations, change the emphasis in communicating with them. Do not support difficult and destructive conversations for you, for example, immediately changing the topic to a more positive one. You can even say directly that you do not want to continue the conversation on this topic or in this tone and will not. They will be offended at first, but then they will accept your terms. This is a tough and categorical option. But here is a softer and more correct option: communicate with such people on neutral topics or on topics that make them feel uplifted and inspired and leave no room for negativity. And, most importantly, lead the conversation yourself, direct it yourself and set its tone. Yes, it's more difficult than following the lead. But do you want to add positivity to your life? Then you have to work a little harder.
And at the same time, be sure to look for people similar to you in spirit and way of thinking, with similar ideals and aspirations, and begin to get closer to them. This way you will gradually form a social circle that will inspire and encourage you to further development and will become support and support for you.
Where does apathy come from?
There can be many reasons for the development of apathy. More often, the reasons are characteristic of both age categories and gender.
Depending on gender and age, various psychological, psychophysical or endogenous factors may be decisive.
The most common causes of apathy in middle age, which can be put in first place, are the presence of work that provokes emotional exhaustion, the so-called “burnout.” It is inherent, in particular, to people whose professions involve constant communication with other people.
For all groups and ages, the cause of apathy can be physical weakness of the body - for example, after a severe pathological condition (illness, stress, surgery).
Emotional emptiness, as a result after some expected event, is another provocateur of an apathetic state.
Lack of interest in anything can also be associated with vitamin deficiency and even a seasonal lack of sunlight, for example, in winter or late autumn.
Long-term stress, whether physical or emotional, can also lead to apathy.
Very often, the impetus for the appearance of apathy is stress that arises as a consequence of a negative life event. This could be a threat to the life or death of a loved one, as well as separation from a loved one.
Large-scale national holidays entail the occurrence of apathy as a result of taking large amounts of alcohol, as a consequence of a toxic “blow” to the body and can affect large groups of people, and not just individuals, sometimes this happens among the entire adult population of the city. In addition, at such moments, even for those who did not drink alcohol, a period of decreased mood also occurs, since people are influenced by mass moods, and at such moments they become indifferent to everything.
Lack of interest in something indicates the psycho-emotional and physical state of a person, and if such conditions occur frequently or if there is a long-lasting lack of interest over time, we can say that the person has developed or is beginning to form some kind of malfunction of the higher nervous system with the manifestation depressive coloring. This is a signal that you need to take care of your mental health and consult a competent psychotherapist in person for a more detailed diagnosis and to find out the true causes of such negative feelings.
Apathy - what to do?
Let's hit apathy with bright emotions!
In most cases, feelings of lack of interest are temporary and are not classified as pathological. It is enough to make a small effort for the mood to change.
If apathy is not a sign of mental illness or physical fatigue, it is not difficult to overcome. “To float to the surface, you need to push off from the very bottom” - this advice is worth taking. It's not forbidden to feel a little sad.
Just don’t think long about problems and troubles. Better focus on your inner experiences. Self-pity and indifference to others will certainly be replaced by vigorous activity. After all, having understood his feelings, a person strives to change something in life and most often makes the right decisions.
Lack of interest in anything, which is provoked by minor troubles? Treat yourself. Attend a theater performance or concert, cheer for your favorite football team at the stadium, just go shopping or stop by your favorite cafe. Do what you love. Forcing yourself to “treat” in this way is the most difficult thing, but the emotions you will receive are guaranteed to bring you back to life.
Apathy can easily be confused with simply being in a bad mood.
Often, his loved ones should also think about how to help a person get out of a state of detachment. Allow the depressed person to be alone for a while, but you should not leave him in this state for a long time. It may become even more complicated. A good remedy against apathy is work - but not everyday work, but work that was planned to be completed for a long time, but, as always, there was not enough time.
For example, watching a sincere, interesting film is another step towards getting out of an apathetic state.
You think that nothing depends on you
Reason #4 is your perception of yourself as a victim of circumstances. And everyone knows perfectly well how hard they can press. And when everything piles up like a snowball, it’s easy to start feeling crushed by this lump, when you can’t breathe or move. And the longer you are in such captivity and numbness, the more helpless and worthless you feel and the more difficult it is to do anything at all to get out. And here, you see, there’s no time for desires either. It would be good to survive, to somehow stay afloat.
What to do? Such a view of things is only an illusion caused by being inside the situation, inside the problem. If you try to abstract yourself at least a little and look at the situation from the outside, as if someone else were in it, then you can see a way out, and not just one. But remember: in order to distance yourself from the situation, you need to make an effort on yourself - there is no other way.
And one moment. Do not immediately take on the solution of a global, complex problem. You are unlikely to be able to conquer Everest. Start small - with easy tasks or small parts of a difficult task that you can do now. To do this, break it down into steps and make a plan-route for your movement to the final goal. This way you won’t get lost on this path and won’t wander in circles.
Plus, by performing simple actions, you can get out of the perception of yourself as a victim and feel that a lot depends on you. This will allow you to gain strength and self-confidence.
What to do
It is not enough to understand what is really happening. It is also important to find the strength to try to correct the situation. As a result of meaningful steps and decisions made, the attitude towards what is happening changes. Some people sincerely wonder what to do in this situation, but few find the right solution.
Self acceptance
The very first thing to do is try to refuse criticism. Self-acceptance implies approval of one's own actions and actions. This cannot be achieved on the first try. It takes complex, painstaking work on yourself to learn to feel and notice your needs. It is important here not to try to please others, not to try to follow their lead in everything. You need to learn to distinguish your own needs from what is imposed on you, what is forced to do. If for a long period a person did not know how to love himself, then it takes time to rebuild, to launch a new mechanism.
Analysis of a disturbing situation
Before drawing conclusions, you should have a good understanding of what is happening and understand what exactly is tormenting you so much. Anxiety can appear for various reasons, but they are always associated with dissatisfaction with the current life situation. You need to analyze your situation as fully as possible. Perhaps you will be able to find a hidden meaning, an explanation for everything that is happening, a meaning that you did not even suspect. The main thing is not to try to close yourself off from thoughts that come, not to suppress the emotions that arise in yourself. If you want to cry, cry. Tears are a great helper in the fight against stress; you shouldn’t stop yourself from crying.
Hobbies
Nothing charges us with as much energy as doing what we love. An activity that brings joy and pleasure, inspires, helps to believe in existing prospects. There is no need to rush in all directions at once. If you still haven't discovered your strengths, do it gradually. Consistency in everything is a competent approach that allows you to maintain peace of mind. Here you need to pay attention to your desires. Don’t suppress them, but try to implement them - albeit little by little, but regularly. True hobbies open the door to new achievements, help you feel your inner strength and unlock your potential.
New victories
It is not at all necessary to immediately strive to conquer huge peaks. You can start small. The main thing is to move in the right direction and not give up before the first difficulties. It should be understood that one gives up only due to lack of experience. Apparent powerlessness actually turns into acquired skills. Gradually, self-confidence and a desire to achieve mind-blowing results will appear. Well-deserved victories really inspire, they help you see what previously went unnoticed.
Recuperation
You need to try to rest more. Timely release from unpleasant impressions is simply necessary. Only in this case does the nervous system qualitatively relax, and, consequently, new resources appear that can help in solving difficult situations. It is useful to understand in advance that there are no hopeless cases. We ourselves sometimes label ourselves and limit our actions. Restoring strength is not a whim, but a necessary moment that should not be neglected. How can you help yourself? A shower after work will not only invigorate you, but also give you strength and help you take your mind off sad thoughts. Reading your favorite book will fill you with bright positive emotions that are necessary in order to make a responsible decision.
Thus, loss of interest in life cannot be ignored. It will not go away on its own, especially if you remain inactive and close yourself in your own powerlessness. If you cannot cope with the problem on your own, it is recommended to contact the community of psychologists and rehabilitation specialists of Irakli Pozharisky. Working with a professional will allow you to reach a new level of understanding the problem and help you discover hidden internal resources.
You indulge your weaknesses and procrastinate
Reason No. 5 is the habit of postponing until later any actions that could help you get what you want. Postpone these actions until a more favorable time comes. Until a more successful set of circumstances. Until you receive the required amount of money. Until someone big and strong appears - someone who, with one “snap of his fingers,” can arrange everything in the best possible way, or who will give you a magic pill so that everything happens on its own and you don’t have to do anything yourself, so that you don’t have to strain. Familiar excuses? People who dream of starting a new life on Monday or after the New Year argue in exactly the same way...
And here is another way of thinking that leads to postponing things for later: “Life is already hard and full of problems that you don’t know how to cope with. So, maybe today is the last time to please yourself with a good TV series, something tasty, in the evening on the phone with your beloved friend, wandering on the Internet, and postpone the real actions to achieve the goal until tomorrow? What happens tomorrow? Tomorrow you always want to give yourself another indulgence, relax, rest and postpone everything until the next tomorrow. And this path of self-pity, self-indulgence, and concessions continues not for days, not weeks, or even months, but for years...
If you feel sorry for yourself all the time and do nothing for the sake of your dreams, then your dreams dissolve, your desires and meanings go away, and emptiness and boredom settle in your soul.
What to do? Not only set yourself tasks that need to be solved, but also talk about them to significant people. And to as many people as possible, in front of whom it would be embarrassing and scary to disgrace yourself by not doing what you promised. This is a very powerful engine that will make you get off the couch and start acting right away. Can you imagine how you will be bursting with joy and pride in yourself and the desire to share your achievements when you complete everything you set out to do? How inspired will you feel?
Causes of apathy in adults
Most people experience a feeling of apathy from time to time - this is not a pathology. It is worth worrying when apathy is persistent and affects various areas of life.
Apathy can be caused by problems with the areas of the brain that control emotions, goals, and behavior. This is often one of the first symptoms of Alzheimer's disease and other forms of dementia. Up to 70% of people with dementia lose interest in life and become apathetic.
Apathy can also be a symptom of other brain diseases, such as:
- brain injury from a severe blow to the head;
- stroke;
- depression;
- Parkinson's disease;
- Huntington's disease;
- schizophrenia.
Anxiety disorder
When anxiety is no longer just worry, but a reason to see a doctor
When apathy is chronic and severe, it can interfere with performance in many areas of life—making work difficult, social relationships, and even basic daily self-care tasks. Research shows that apathy is a very common phenomenon, with some estimates estimating that apathy affects 5 million adults in Russia.
Our motivation originates in and is regulated by specific areas of the brain. Disruption of these areas (especially the frontal lobes) may be associated with the development of apathy. A decrease in the release of certain substances in the striatum of the brain, especially dopamine, can lead to apathy. Dopamine is the main carrier of information between parts of the brain, and is actively involved in regulating motivation.
The basal ganglia is the part of the brain that regulates the reward system and drive. This zone gives us an idea of the value of behavior or reward for work. Disruption of these networks can also lead to apathy, as there is a discrepancy between motivation and reward or drive, leading to reluctance to work, suppressed sense of purpose.
Therefore, apathy is not “normal,” and long-term apathy should be considered a neurological or psychiatric symptom, most likely related to a brain disorder.
