In ancient times, our ancestors did not have any questions about what a man should do around the house. The head of the family got up early and went hunting to provide himself and his family with food. Household chores fell entirely on the woman’s shoulders: while her husband was busy with his direct duties, she kept order in the cave, looked after the children, and maintained the vital fire.
With the advent of equality, everything has changed and representatives of the stronger sex have to make compromises, agreeing to participate in household chores. But how to divide the amount of work so that husband and wife live in peace and harmony?
What a Man Should Do Around the House
Women's domestic work, of course, allows men to produce more than if they had to work at home.
Thus, a woman becomes an economic factor. Charlotte Perkins Gilman
- 1. Exclusively male concerns 1.1. Force majeure
- 1.2.Needs to be fixed
- 1.3.Caring for your wardrobe
- 2.1.Help me clean up!
- 3.1.How do we work?
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Women's idea of family
What is the role of a man in the family?
What are his responsibilities? This is exactly what this article will be about. Women are romantic natures. Having decided to get married, they indulge themselves with illusions, thinking that their family will have eternal love and mutual understanding. They expect hugs, kisses, tenderness, good stable income, professional growth, and reliability from their husband.
If any demands do not find a response, the woman feels dissatisfaction in the relationship.
In the first 15 years of marriage, the wife's main responsibilities are raising and caring for children. The man works a lot at this time, and he does not have the opportunity to help her with household chores. By the time he returns home, hoping to spend the evening with his wife, she is tired from work and still has household chores to do, cooking dinner, checking her homework.
After children grow up, life becomes easier. They look after themselves and help their mother with housekeeping whenever possible.
Voluntary-compulsory classes
Some requests of the other half are fulfilled by husbands at will. Or out of compassion for the difficult female lot.
Help me clean up!
Large-scale spring cleaning on weekends can ruin more than one marriage.
The main thing is to delimit responsibilities. Among the things that husbands are ready to do almost unquestioningly are:
- Carpet cleaning.
Just 5 minutes of working with the vacuum cleaner and you can rest easy. It’s more difficult if you have to go outside to knock out your grandmother’s old rug and rub it with snow. This is already a task for a physically strong person, so there will be no excuse. - Moving furniture.
The mop may not fit under the oversized sofa? You can't do it without strong hands. - Bathroom care.
A great opportunity to take a break from the noise and be alone with your thoughts.
But not every gentleman will agree to wash the floors. Many husbands fundamentally consider this activity to be a woman’s responsibility.
Kitchen
If he has free time and a love for the culinary arts, a man can help his tired wife prepare a delicious dinner.
Other food-related obligations include:
- Preparing vegetables.
Husbands are allowed to peel potatoes before major holidays. - Knife sharpening.
A cook needs a sharp tool. - Visiting a store.
It’s hard for a fragile girl to carry huge bags. It is better to entrust this mission to a strong companion. - Taking out the trash.
Traditionally, men throw away bags of food waste. - Washing dishes.
After the feast it is easy to persuade. - Wash.
Washing machine required. - Breakfast in bed.
Depends on the mood.
It is difficult to force a husband, who has fulfilled his duty at work, to do women's chores.
But a conscientious husband will never refuse his lady love. Advice:
There is equipment that significantly speeds up the completion of housework. Buying a good modern mop, a washing robot vacuum cleaner, or a dishwasher saves precious hours and nerves.
Children
Both parents must participate in raising a child.
But there is a dependence on the workload of adults. Most often, dads are very busy at work, and therefore cannot devote too much time to their offspring. Parent meetings are attended mainly by mothers. We have to compensate for the lack of attention on weekends.
Advice:
If your work schedule allows, then drop your children off at kindergarten or school. They will appreciate it.
Animals
With pets the situation is usually simpler.
Hygiene is monitored by the one who is free now. Dog walking is distributed according to the same principle or according to the size of the animal. A large four-legged friend means that a person who can keep the animal on a leash will go for a walk with him. Women prefer to walk with small breeds. Not all men walking with miniature lap dogs are ready to withstand the mocking glances of their neighbors.
With fish, hamsters, turtles and other small apartment residents, everything is much simpler. They do not require too much maintenance.
How to understand that a man wants children?
The role of family in a woman's life
Now women have become more independent. For them, the priority is higher education - career - family - children. But they also dream of the one and only thing, only the requirements for it become higher.
No matter how independent a woman is, she needs a reliable man with whom she can create a strong family. She is encouraged to start a family by love, motherhood and regular sex. A woman’s main purpose in life is to give birth and raise one or more children.
Starting a family is not difficult, it is difficult to become happy in this union.
The family is the basic unit of society, characterized by such features as voluntary marriage and the desire to bear and raise children. Family members are connected by a common life.
Source Wikipedia
What should a man do at home in the evening?
Now women work equally with men, but at the same time they still have the lion's share of the housework that needs to be done. All worries about children, home, cleaning and cooking fall on the woman’s shoulders, despite the fact that she works 8 hours a day.
What a man should do at home in the evening:
- If a man earns little and comes home before his wife, then it is necessary to discuss or divide the housework equally, or according to possibilities. If a man comes home much earlier than his wife, he can cook dinner or throw laundry in the wash.
- If the wife comes earlier and has a part-time job, then she does almost all the housework.
- Now, due to the crisis, many are faced with the fact that men earn very little. The funds earned are only enough to cover utility bills and purchase a small amount of food. The rest of the money a woman earns is spent on purchasing groceries and on children. Thus, a woman chooses voluntary slavery.
- In fact, no one is obligated to do anything. Of course, many men who lived with their parents were accustomed to the Soviet way of life, when a woman had to do everything. However, times were different and the working day was 6-8 hours.
- Many mothers were able to work half as much on a part-time basis. Now the situation has changed, so if a woman has a good salary, she is unlikely to be at home at 17:00. Most often, a woman comes home very late, and she spends the couple of hours that she has left on rest and on doing housework.
Laundry
The man in the family. Woman's look
When a man gets married, he must realize that he is taking responsibility for his wife’s well-being and that he will have to deal with family problems all his life.
Yes, a man should be the head of the family, BUT! A WORTHY MAN who will take care of her, care for his wife, cherish, protect, carry in his arms, blow away specks of dust - in general, LOVE!)
Men's responsibilities in the family
The husband must:
- Take care of your wife, give her compliments, be gentle with her;
- Provide her with money;
- Help keep the house in order;
- Help raise children, ensure their safety and confidence in the future;
- Create comfortable living conditions;
- Be faithful;
- Give your wife the opportunity to rest.
A man must work on himself and improve. If he does not do this, he will inevitably degrade. His character will deteriorate, bad habits will appear, and failures will haunt him.
Any normal man tries to provide for his family financially, and not hope that his wife will do it.
What qualities should a good family man have?
A good, decent father is a solid foundation for creating a strong family.
What qualities, from a woman’s point of view, should he have?
- Love your wife and children . And this feeling should accompany him wherever he is. He should always think about them and dream of returning to them as soon as possible;
- Be responsible. He must be able to make the right decisions in any life situation and bear responsibility for them;
- Ensure prosperity in the family . The man in the family is the breadwinner, so it is he who must solve the financial needs of the family;
- Improve yourself . He must constantly develop, try himself in something new, realize his ideas;
- Trust your wife . Respect her views, take into account the opinion of his wife.
Husband and wife in marriage are equal partners, but still all serious decisions must be made by the husband.
He must be strict, but this must be supported by love and kindness.
It is the husband who is responsible for how his family lives. He must teach his children to work, showing by example that this is very important.
How exactly to distribute household responsibilities? Clinical psychologist Anastasia Butenko answers
It’s great to distribute household responsibilities into comfort zones. In Game of Thrones there was a wonderful line from one of the main characters, Tyrion, that compromise is when everyone is unhappy. It seems to me that the distribution of responsibilities is about the same.
Both have to do something, both may not like it, but they will still have to do it one way or another. Therefore, it would be great for both people to choose activities that are more or less to their liking. If this is not possible, then we simply cut equally into everything we usually do.
And, of course, we take it as an axiom that staying at home with children is the same job, so when my husband comes, we begin to divide this time in half.
The role of the husband in the family
A man is a husband and father. He, like a woman, plays a big role in the family. Love for the wife, the desire to provide for the family financially, participation in raising children and the children’s attachment to their father - all this helps strengthen the family, creates harmonious relationships and makes the family happy.
A man needs a family just as a man needs a family.
A man must be:
- Leader . Complete harmony should reign in the relationship between husband and wife. A man must make decisions and bear responsibility for their consequences. He must provide all family members with a comfortable existence;
- A breadwinner . A man’s task is to provide financial support for the family. He must provide the family with food, and the woman must prepare breakfast, lunch and dinner from it.
- Defender . A man's duty is to protect his family from any danger.
What a man should do around the house: tips
Experts recommend going shopping, cooking, and cleaning the house together. Of course, modern couples can work on different schedules and their weekends do not coincide. There will be no talk about spending time together.
What should a man do around the house, tips:
- In such cases, it is recommended that family responsibilities at home be divided between spouses. For example, on weekends a father takes his child to a tutor and he vacuums the house. The wife prepares food and teaches homework with the children. Thus, it turns out to relieve the woman and involve the man in housework.
- Of course, there are representatives of the stronger half of humanity who will refuse to perform such duties, citing the fact that this is not a man’s job. Under no circumstances should you make a scandal; you should try to come to an agreement.
- If a woman is stitched up and does not have time to fulfill all the duties assigned to her, and is very tired, it is necessary to offer her husband an alternative. Preparing dinner can take a decent amount of time, so you can agree once or twice a week that the man will buy food in a restaurant or in the home kitchen. This will help relieve the woman’s workload and improve the relationship between spouses.
Collaboration
The role of a man in the family - psychology
After marriage, a man’s psychology changes and differs from the psychology of a single man. And this is quite understandable, because family life changes habits, lifestyle, and priorities.
Even when married, a man pays attention to other women. But he should not show, much less voice to his wife, that other women are more attractive than her. A woman understands that she is not the most beautiful and the best housewife in the world, but she must be sure that for her husband she is the best. A husband should be tactful and loving.
If a wife does not feel interested in herself, then she herself becomes more indifferent to her husband. And the lack of mutual interest is reflected in the sex life of the spouses. Spouses should respect each other and emphasize each other's successes.
Family life is never cloudless, but it depends on both the husband and wife to ensure that there are as few conflicts in the family as possible. Some solve their problems through shouting and insults. And many solve them in a calm atmosphere, because they trust each other and know who is better versed in which area.
Should a man do housework?
Very often, scandals arise between men and women out of the blue. This usually occurs due to division of homework. After all, it is the woman who does the cooking and cleaning of the house. The most interesting thing is that in ancient times, a woman was responsible for maintaining the hearth and creating comfort in the house. Now, due to emancipation and equality, women work just like men, earning no less. But at the same time, housework remained on the shoulders of the woman.
Should a man do housework?
- Recently, feminist organizations that promote a free lifestyle have become very popular. Accordingly, women want to be more free and freed from household chores.
- In European countries, where the standard of living is much higher than in our country, women already go to work 3 or 6 months after giving birth, leaving their children with nannies. In our country, due to the low cost of living, as well as high prices, not every woman can afford a nanny, even if she gets a job. Therefore, in most cases, women are forced to take maternity leave, or combine work and home, while sometimes working at home.
- After giving birth to children, such women, in order to be constantly at home and keep children under supervision, take manicure courses, or find work that can be done at home. All housework also falls on the woman's shoulders. Many of them have a natural question: what should a man do when he comes home from work?
- A man should not say that household chores are women’s work, and must help his wife.
The man does nothing
Why does a man need a family?
- The most obvious answer is that family is the place where a man is surrounded by family. Where he can come to rest and relax;
- There is a favorable psychological climate in the family, in which the woman is his comrade-in-arms, creates conditions for relaxation, and helps to conduct his business;
- A strong family is a way to continue your family line, raise children who in the future will be able to continue their father’s work;
- The family helps a man to realize the qualities of a leader, if he has them, and if they are not enough, to acquire them.
But what is it like to be a real man? What should he be able to do and how to become one?
At the beginning, it is important to say that everyone needs guidance and support from a real... person.
In an individual of the human species capable of organizing, rebuilding, creating, doing, implementing, helping, punishing, solving their problems and, out of love, kindness, extending their power and abilities to a family, a group of people... a region, homeland, continent, humanity.
It so happens that the most suitable organism for the implementation of these functions is a man. Unlike a woman, he is not burdened with bearing, feeding, raising children - internal issues. And due to mobility and physical strength, it is suitable for defending external interests.
Therefore, evolutionarily, a man became the owner of the titles of lighthouse, leader and leader of the nation.
The role of the father in the family
Parents are not born, they are made. And every child wants to have caring and loving parents. Therefore, adults need to engage in their upbringing in order to become good fathers and mothers.
Many fathers believe that they should become involved in raising their child only when he grows up. And while he is still small, one mother is enough for him. But such an arrangement does not benefit either the child or the father.
A father is more than just a father to a child. For him, he is a symbol of masculinity, a symbol of a man.
The father sets an example of behavior in the family, is an authority, a source of confidence, the personification of discipline and order. It helps the child learn about the world and technology, teaches him how to work, guides him towards his future profession, and creates goals and ideals.
The father brings the child into society, teaches him to take initiative and resist group pressure. He takes care of children less, thereby instilling self-discipline in the child and giving him more independence.
With a father, the child does not feel fear; in the eyes of the child, the father can do anything. Very often a loving father is a more effective teacher than a mother. Usually a child who grew up in a family without paternal authority is undisciplined and asocial. Young men who grew up in a single-parent family may exhibit increased aggressiveness.
Girls feel a lack of male attention, trying to make up for it by getting married early or simply having affairs with different men.
For full development, every boy must communicate with his father every day, be friends with him, receive his approval, and have a role model before his eyes.
In a daughter, her father helps her develop a positive self-esteem. Constant communication with her father teaches her to understand male psychology and not be afraid of men.
Features of modern society
Genetically, women are stronger and more resilient than men: this feature was given by nature in order to survive in harsh conditions and protect offspring. With the advent of civilization, the female sex began to be perceived as weak, defenseless and tender, in need of a strong male shoulder, love and care. Who would have thought of shifting hard work onto the fragile shoulders of some medieval countess? It’s better to let her keep order in the house, and her husband will take care of the rest.
One should not assume that the images of invincible breadwinners and caring keepers of the hearth are hopelessly a thing of the past. Rather, they underwent significant deformation, which only strengthened their position during the Second World War. Remember the footage that has come down to us from those times: women worked in factories, fought for the freedom of the country and, in general, performed difficult “male” duties.
And he will enter a burning hut and stop a galloping horse.
The war has passed, but there are no fewer things to do: most modern women, working 5 days a week, miraculously manage to do the cleaning, raise children, cook dinner and perform other marital duties. As practice shows, every second man in this cycle of events is limited to the modest conviction “I am working,” which is an automatic indulgence from everyday hardships.
Genetics has endowed the “weaker sex” with innate endurance, but even the most wear-resistant resource one day comes to an end. We will talk further about how to prevent emotional burnout, poor health and registration with the registry office for divorce.
Respect 2
Often men perceive a woman only as a sexual object and look at her with lust. If you listen to what people talk about in all-male groups, there will be no room for life values, but there will be plenty of talk about available girls and variations on this theme: jokes, fables and stories.
A man needs to learn to control his feelings and raise them above his instincts. Therefore, a serious young man should have a relationship with one woman to whom he gives his time, attention and feelings. And discussing other options is unacceptable.
A man must not only not allow himself to insult a woman or speak rudely, but also protect her from the condemnation of relatives, acquaintances and other people. Some women even allow assault in relationships. This behavior leads to the fact that a man decomposes even more, since he allows such actions towards a woman.
She needs to become smarter not only for her own sake, but also for the sake of the man himself. Her life's purpose is to show him that it is wrong to behave this way; to do this, she must limit access to herself.
Also, you should not let a situation take its course when your beloved man has used you to achieve his own goals. What to do in such a situation, read further at the link.