Being at a distance with a loved one is always difficult. Especially when there are deep feelings.
It's normal to feel a little sad and want to see someone with whom you feel good and comfortable. But when you feel like it’s impossible to live without a person, when he occupies all your thoughts, and you literally physically feel discomfort, this is already an alarm bell.
A red flag called “emotional dependence.” This addiction can become a problem that needs to be worked through.
In this article:
Reasons why you may be bored How to understand that you are emotionally dependent 7 tips for being bored less
Why do you feel sad?
Even when separation occurs by mutual decision, feelings of resentment and anxiety do not leave us. Why is this happening? The main reasons are the fear of being alone and a feeling of attachment to a partner.
One of the important human needs is the feeling of being needed by someone. As soon as a breakup occurs, the mind reacts heavily to reality. There is a feeling of mental discomfort that gives rise to melancholy. The brain continuously scrolls through pictures from the past, memories aggravate the situation. There comes an awareness of the loss of emotional and physical connection with a loved one.
It is easy to get out of a state of despair and anxiety if you learn to hear yourself, accept your fears and begin to make your desires come true. There are simple but effective ways to help you recover after a breakup.
How to survive a breakup with your loved one
Texts of prayers
There are different texts of prayers that must be chosen depending on the situation. The words in them can be changed, but the meaning must remain the same.
The painful suffering of a person is longing for the deceased.
From longing for the deceased
“Lord Jesus, you are the Lord of heaven and earth! You see everything, hear everything, watch everyone from Your Kingdom. Do not despise the impudence that I turn to You with such a request. Hear the prayers and lamentations, calm the soul and heart, break this thread connecting with the deceased (name). May Your servant rest in peace, may he be at ease and well in Your Kingdom, may he not know suffering, grief and sadness. Let the sinful soul of Your servant (your name) go in peace.
I yearned for him, I can’t spend days or nights, I’m still sad about him, his bright image does not leave the memories of past years. I can’t do this anymore, I don’t have the strength to endure this torment and suffering. See this and do not punish strictly. Forgive all past sins, I repent and ask for mercy.
Let the sadness let go, let it go far, far away, beyond the blue seas, beyond the high mountains, beyond the wide fields and impassable wilds. May he never return back. Summon bright joy, earthly goodness to replace it. I want to be calm for Your servant (name), because he is under Your wing, in Your Kingdom. I don’t want to shed any more tears, I want to celebrate life and smile.
All of us, righteous people, will fall into Your Kingdom of the Lord, so let peace and quiet reign in our souls, and not fear and sadness. Let it be so. In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Now, forever and forever. Amen".
The prayer must be read 3 times a day for a month. It is advisable to visit the temple and light a candle for the repose of your soul.
From longing for a loved one
“O Almighty! Hear this request and do not refuse to fulfill it. I have the boldness to turn to You, because my soul suffers and asks for peace. Give her strength, help her cope with the pain, banish memories from her bright little head. Give hope and faith in a better outcome, help to let go of your beloved so that you don’t have to catch up with the setting sun every day. Let me reconcile and submit to fate, accept it and let go in peace of the one who is leaving, who is moving away every minute.
May his path be covered with a carpet of green grass and flowers, may their aromas fill his every day. Let him not be angry and offended, and not strictly punish the servant of God (his name), who dared to love him. And I let go of all grievances and misunderstandings, everything unsaid and unfinished. Let it no longer torment us, let it not appear in our dreams, let it not disturb our thoughts, let it not bring misty sadness to our hearts.
Let the Almighty God decide our destinies, I trust in his fair decision. May he grant us freedom and send to each of us that person who is destined by fate. Let these words be heard. From now on, forever and ever. Amen".
The prayer must be said morning and evening every day for 2 weeks. If there is no result, the procedure should be repeated for 1 month.
From melancholy and despondency
A depressed person is depressed and joyless.
“Oh green melancholy, sadness of the swamp, perish, wicked one, and take your sisters with you. Let despair, despondency, sadness and disappointment go away. Let them gather on a clear day in a green meadow, talk, consult, exchange words among themselves, and set off on a long journey. And the path is not easy. It lies through dense forests, impassable swamps, impassable wilds, high mountains and deep seas and oceans. Not everyone will make it, some of them will perish along the way.
Let the torment dissipate, scatter to the wind, longing and heartache recede. Those who get to the marshy swamp, which is located in impenetrable thickets, will sink to its very bottom, far, far away, to rinse their abyss and never get out of there. There will be no return for them, neither on the day, nor on the night, nor on holidays, nor on weekdays. And whoever survives and gets lost on the road, may never find his way back, and will remain wandering around the world restless.
Let them never meet good people on the way, let them not greet you, let them not get into your soul, let them not dig their claws into you. Let them be swept away by winter snowstorms, autumn foliage, spring showers, and let the summer sun's rays burn them to dust.
I want to forget everything and leave in the past all the memories, good and bad, obsessive thoughts, tears shed, sorrows experienced. Let them remain in yesterday, let it absorb them completely and keep them forever. May they neither today nor tomorrow come to life, may they not return back, may they not knock on the door. I will lock all the doors and windows, I will protect my soul from bad weather, I will save my heart from the cold of the past.
May there be only love and harmony, joy and happiness in this world. I will pray to the Lord God about this every day and every night. May He send His heavenly grace to us. Let it be so. From now on, forever and ever. Amen".
You need to say these words until the pain goes away and the melancholy goes away.
Accept and let go of the situation
An important step in dealing with the consequences of a breakup is accepting the current situation. Relationships are not the whole of life, but only a small part of it. People break up for various reasons. Yes, you need to cry, talk it out, let it go through yourself and let go. After breaking up with your partner, it's easy to figure out what you can do to fill your free space. Is there any room left for meetings with friends, work, hobbies? If yes, use the switching method to shift the focus to them. If not, try to bring it all back to life.
Close access to the past
The main mistake that many people make after a breakup is trying to go back to the past. Viewing photos and videos together, thinking about pleasant moments, calling and texting your ex-partner - all this provokes new attacks of apathy. If the decision to leave was deliberate and firm, then there should be no return to the past relationship. It is better to delete all photos and videos, contacts on your phone, social networks, throw away things and everything that leads to a feeling of discomfort.
I was abandoned. What to do?
Change the scenery
Leaving the city for a while, flying to the sea or visiting a friend is something that will help you switch gears and get emotional release. A change of environment has a beneficial effect on emotional imbalance. New events and acquaintances, although not for long, will captivate you. This period should be regarded not as an escape from problems, but as an opportunity for the rehabilitation of the soul.
Why does a man come back after a breakup?
When longing is for good: changing the direction of the vector
How many beautiful poems, sonnets, songs and poems were composed thanks to unrequited love! Perhaps there is a genius dormant in you too?
Or maybe there is no genius at all. But we’re not fighting for the Pulitzer Prize now, right? Creativity may be the best solution if you are looking for an answer to the question of what to do. If you miss a person, entrust your emotions to paper or keys. Spit out your feelings, put your longing into words.
Start a renovation
Apartment renovation is a suitable alternative to a change of scenery when it is not possible to leave the city. In addition, this is an opportunity to completely immerse yourself in the process of interior renovation. The pleasant chores associated with buying wallpaper, thinking through the design and purchasing new furniture will help attract thoughts and get rid of feelings of melancholy and anxiety.
Bored SMS for a guy: TOP – 100 messages
Professional journalist, author of a poetry collection and several literary publications.
Expert - Margarita Lopukhova
Family psychologist. For 8 years I have been saving “family units” from disintegration. I help couples find love and understanding again.
2020-09-25
107258, Russia, Moscow, Pogonny proezd, 14с1
It happens when you want to write to a guy how much you miss him, but you have absolutely no ideas on how to start a conversation. Write out of boredom: “Hello. How are you? What are you doing?" - not an option. It's rare that these phrases develop into a fascinating dialogue.
Then a universal list of SMS options comes to the rescue. They will help not only build an interesting correspondence, but also express your feelings, tell how much the lady misses the object of her claims. Let's quickly get acquainted with these phrases!
Do what you want
The best way to distract yourself from bad thoughts is to fill your life with many events and find a way to have fun. Now is the time to take bold actions and make your dreams come true. Let it be small whims - a new hairstyle, signing up for a massage course, going to the spa or cinema, a new tattoo. This will give you the opportunity to feel your freedom and begin to enjoy it, and small joys will gradually begin to crowd out the unpleasant consequences of the breakup.
Why do men leave their wives?
On the nail
Rules for performing the ritual to get rid of sad thoughts:
- At midnight, during the waning moon, find a crevice in the wooden floor.
- Read the spell by cutting off a piece of your own nail and placing it in this hole: “Just as this nail will never again return to the finger of the servant of the Lord (you), so my soul will be left in pain and will never return again. I’ll lock what I’ve said behind a huge lock, I’ll hide the key under the floorboard - no one will ever be able to find it.”
- Read the plot 3 times in a row.
Having completed the ritual, you should immediately go to bed without saying a word. After just 10 days, a person will feel an improvement in their emotional state and a surge of strength.
Workout
Sport is a panacea for many emotional experiences. The main thing is to have fun and without harm to health. Hours of strength training or jogging in the fresh air will work like antidepressants. In addition, during sports, the body produces endorphin - the hormone of joy. As a bonus - good health and a toned body.
It is natural to experience sadness after a breakup with a loved one. To get rid of this feeling, you need to learn to love and hear yourself, understand your life goals and strive to realize them.
Time cures
As strange as it may sound, over time you will miss the person you lost less and less. If you were able to immediately pull yourself together and tune in to healing, then within a couple of months you will be able to see wonderful changes not only in your state of mind.
By distracting yourself from boredom with useful and interesting things, you will certainly be able to achieve some results, learn new things, become more interesting and disciplined, and make pleasant acquaintances. Never give up on those things that bring you joy.
