Scientists have found that when we feel love, joy, fear and other emotions, certain substances and hormones are produced in the body. The influence of hormones is especially obvious when observing animals. It is not known for certain how much a person depends on the chemical reactions of the body.
AiF.ru figured out what substances, according to scientists, make up the “formula of love.”
Crush: phenylethylamine*
This chemical is located in the core of the brain - the amygdala. It promotes the expression of emotions such as sympathy and love attraction.
According to the psychochemical hypothesis of researcher Michael Liebowitz), phenylethylamine is produced in the brain the moment a person meets someone he likes. At the same time, we are overcome by emotions and excitement, the cause of which is precisely phenylethylamine. Note that this theory has not yet been fully confirmed by scientists.
Phenylethylamine is present in chocolate, sweets, and diet drinks. However, the substance is very quickly destroyed and broken down even at the initial stage of digestion. For the state of love, it is phenylethylamine that is secreted by the brain itself, that is, endogenous.
The sequence of formation of love affection
Complex formulations, understandable only to professional neuroscientists, will tell the average person little about how exactly we fall in love. Therefore, if we translate this process into everyday language, it will look like this. A person sees an attractive object, the brain receives a signal that this is a suitable partner, and releases a portion of phenylethylamine into the blood. Thanks to this, a person begins to experience a feeling of love in the romantic sense of the word. Then the hormones suppress the work of those parts of the brain that are responsible for a critical attitude towards other people and towards the object of love in particular. A person’s threshold of anxiety and sense of danger are reduced, the world seems beautiful and benevolent due to the fact that unmotivated trust appears. The result is a special chemistry and a feeling of unity that partners share if the feeling of love is reciprocated.
Likes: pheromones
In 1959, entomologists Peter Carlson and Martin Lusher proposed to call pheromones (from the Greek phero - carry and hormao - excite) substances that an animal releases into the environment and which cause certain behavioral reactions in another animal of the same species.
In animals, the power of pheromones is very strong, in particular, it is pheromones that allow males and females to find each other and engage in sexual contact.
Androsterone (or androstenone) is a male sex hormone derived from the hormone testosterone*. It is found in urine and sweat. The smell of this hormone attracts women in the middle of their cycle, but not the rest of the time. Men always find the smell of this hormone repulsive. Scientists believe that this androsterone increases sexual attractiveness and helps attract the opposite sex.
Copulins are hormones similar to androstenone, but only in women. This substance attracts men.
Humans, unlike animals, control their feelings and behavior, so the power of hormones over us is not so strong. Research confirms that participants did not experience romantic feelings or sexual arousal when they inhaled these substances. However, many people continue to believe in the magical properties of pheromones, and the production of perfumes with pheromones has been put into production.
Love symptoms
Symptoms are spoken of in cases where we are talking about painful conditions. Therefore, there will undoubtedly be people who find it offensive to compare falling in love with an illness. But from a chemical and physiological point of view this is exactly the case. WHO added falling in love to the list of health disorders back in 2008. So what will indicate falling in love from a practical point of view? Of those parameters that can be measured, the level of adrenaline that is more than 10 times higher than normal attracts attention. By the way, this amount is three times higher than the level of adrenaline during myocardial infarction. Other manifestations include insomnia, obsessive thoughts about the object of love, increased heart rate, headaches, fluctuations in blood pressure, and stress.
Mood: serotonin*
Serotonin is a neurotransmitter - one of the substances that is a chemical transmitter of impulses between nerve cells in the human brain.
This substance increases muscle tone and increases physical activity. Serotonin improves mood, and its deficiency causes depression.
Serotonin production is promoted by carbohydrate foods such as bread, bananas, chocolate, table sugar or fructose. This indirectly confirms the prevailing assertion in society that people with a sweet tooth, as well as overweight people, are kinder than thin people.
On what basis do we choose the object of our love?
As a rule, this is a combination of physiological and psychological factors. But at the very first stage, the chemistry of love comes into play again. In the nose of every person there is a gland that secretes pheromones: copulin in women and androstenol in men. There is also a special vomeronasal organ, or Jacobson's fossa, which is designed to perceive pheromones. But we choose the person whose genetic code is most different from ours. This is extremely important information, because the combination of unrelated genes produces healthier offspring, which has been confirmed by numerous studies in this area.
If a person loves, he is ready for life changes
It is wrong to believe that the human essence is static. Throughout life we can change. And if a person wants to preserve love for many years, he is ready for changes in character. But there is one condition - this is done only voluntarily. Any restrictions or coercion kill feelings.
If a partner sees that his significant other is capable of changing himself in order to preserve the marriage and peace in the family, then there is no doubt that there is love on his part.
Sometimes, under the influence of strong feelings, a person involuntarily changes, becomes kinder, more cheerful, more energetic and happier.
Let's look at the reasons why a man loses interest in a woman
How to distinguish love from addiction and attraction
Psychologists believe that the hallmark of true love is primarily the desire for constancy, while attraction can be felt towards several people at once
A lover truly has only one person of the opposite sex to whom he devotes all his attention
Addiction is characterized by a pathological desire for possession and boundless jealousy. The addict does not recognize the free will of the object of adoration and experiences extreme pain if his desire is not satisfied immediately and fully.
Attraction is often dominated by the desire for physical intimacy. High spiritual values inherent in true love, such as sacrifice, self-denial, the desire to create a family, attraction are not inherent or are in their infancy.
A certain test for true love is temporary separation, for example, if one of the couple has to leave for a while. The French thinker La Rochefoucauld compared separation to the wind: it blows out a candle, but fans the fire. Temporary attraction, when you don’t see a person for a certain period, will go out like a candle. A real feeling helps a couple survive the period of separation, and after a long-awaited meeting, love flares up with renewed vigor.
How long does falling in love last?
Based on experiments in which people of different sexes and ages took part, it can be determined with a high degree of probability that the duration of the entire cycle of reactions characteristic of falling in love almost always falls within a period of 3.5 to 4 years. This is also confirmed by the statistics of divorces, most of which occur before a couple has crossed the five-year mark of family life.
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Losing your own identity
In many ways, psychological frustration after a breakup is due to the fact that during the relationship we integrate a partner into our identity. Many people look at themselves through the eyes of a lover and borrow his vision for self-identification and for building a picture of the future. Taking one of the main elements out of this picture causes us to experience a feeling of destruction of the self-image and a loss of control over our lives and confusion.
Often we grieve not so much for a specific person, but for the picture of our “self” that he allowed us to build. Awareness of this fact helps to shift the focus to working on your condition.
The question “who am I?” - a normal existential question for singles and married people, polyamorous people, young people and old people. Its complexity forces us to look for an answer - in activism, creativity or philosophy. It just sounds louder in moments of crisis.
Use this moment to reflect on what you expect from life and who you want to become. Otherwise you will fall in love again, and there will be no time for existentialism.
How does a loving man behave?
The first acquaintance took place, the bouquet given on the date had not yet faded, but the counterpart did not call again. How to perceive such behavior? There may be several reasons.
How a loving man behaves:
- Uncertain behavior and anxiety
Take a closer look at your date. Facial expressions and gestures are much more expressive than words. If he is very nervous, lost and cannot speak coherently, or, conversely, is too cold and self-confident, then you can calm down. Most likely, he feels that he is in love.
- Desire to please, to please
It's nice to receive gifts, but it's no less nice to give them, which is what loving guys prefer. It could be a luxurious surprise or a pleasant trifle, a trip to a restaurant or a movie. Perhaps this is not the case when you just want to while away the evening. Most likely, a loving young man is showing signs of attention, expecting to gather more information about you during a casual conversation.
- Sincere emotions
It is impossible to completely hide what a man feels when he loves a woman or experiences deep feelings about another matter. An open face, eyes sparkling with joy, a willingness to answer any question, a languid look - all this speaks of serious passion. A loving person is not indifferent to your opinion, he tries to show himself from the best side.
- Pays special attention to his appearance
Even a young man who is not particularly neat, when getting ready for a date, will wash and carefully iron his trousers, put on a fresh shirt, and use expensive perfume. After all, his goal is to convince the girl that he is the best. In this regard, loving men, like women, are well aware of the role of appearance in the courtship process. Therefore, a gallant gentleman must look perfect in order to win the lady’s favor.
- Interested in your life
Some comrades may call 10 times a day to keep abreast of your every move, but this is a rare occurrence. Usually, a young man, carried away by a new acquaintance, tries to learn more about your friends and even get to know them. He is interested in how you like to spend your leisure time, where you prefer to go on vacation, your favorite dishes, and so on on the list. This information makes it possible to feel and fulfill your desires. A real gentleman will never forget to call.
