How to find love at 30–40 years old: 5 working methods

The article explains:

Reasons for human need for love
Finding out your personal motives for seeking love
10 Tips for Finding True Love

You probably won’t meet a person on earth who wouldn’t say at least once, at least to himself: “I want to find love!” The trouble is that desire alone is not enough. To achieve a certain goal, you need to take very specific steps.

There is no universal means for successfully “discovering” your soulmate. All people are individual, and relationships in couples are even more individual. But we will still try to give some general recommendations for finding the most important person in your life.

What is love?

A lot has already been said about what love is. Almost every great thinker has addressed this topic. And yet, it is worth clarifying this definition, since it is difficult to look for what you do not understand.

Love is a set of complex positive energies given to people by Higher powers. Love is a feeling that brings two people closer together based on their mutual positive emotions - friendship, joy, interest, devotion, unity and admiration for each other.

Unfortunately, love does not always turn out to be true, and many people at a certain period of their lives find themselves cut off from this feeling, deprived of it. Why is this happening?

Online dating

Many couples met through social networks or special websites. In addition, there are mobile applications that connect people based on their mutual interest, suitable age and sexual orientation. Don’t be afraid to try to find communication via the Internet; in the 21st century, many people use this.

Advice for women

Do not show negative emotions - hysterics, screaming, lack of restraint.
Smile more often.
Don't try to seem overly smart, but don't make a fool of yourself either.
There is no need to demand payment of all expenses.

Why are people lonely?

There are more reasons for loneliness than is commonly thought. About people over 30-40 years old who do not have a loved one, most often they put forward rather banal versions: a tendency towards careerism, an unpleasant character, a love of loneliness. Most often, such judgments about strangers are erroneous and one-sided. Even when analyzing their own loneliness, people often do not understand its true reasons:

Crown of celibacy. This version is often put forward as a joke, but in fact, it is quite real. If in a past life a person was a monk or nun, or died young and did not meet his love, in the next incarnation he can continue to carry this program. In addition, there are damage and curses on celibacy. In essence, this is a programmatic ban on having a happy personal life. A person with such a problem can start a relationship, but it does not become serious or long-lasting.
Psychological blocks and unconscious resistance on the part of the person himself, his psyche. Such blocks appear as a result of a painful experience in youth, or an unsuccessful example of parental relationships in the family, or because of a person’s dislike for himself. Many people, without realizing it, consider relationships to be something alarming and dangerous. It seems to them that there are no happy couples, and any romance will only make things worse for them. In addition, they may consider themselves ugly and unworthy of love. Often, such blocks arise to save a person from pain in the event of a real failure, but they do not allow starting any relationship at all.
Karmic prohibitions and oaths of fidelity in past lives. If in a previous incarnation a person had a soulmate, he could take an oath of eternal love and fidelity to her. Especially strong vows continue to operate in subsequent incarnations, which interferes with the search for a partner. Karmic prohibitions can be imposed on a person’s soul for his behavior in past lives. For example, he was a traitor, broke hearts, and for this he is punished by loneliness in the next incarnation.

All these reasons give rise to loneliness and lack of love in life. Because of them, a person behaves incorrectly and does not find his love.

Start working with a psychologist right now

Start a consultation
To free yourself from negative attitudes and rethink the painful experience of past relationships, seek psychological help. People can go in circles for many years, stepping on the same rake, and several sessions with a psychologist give them the opportunity to take a fresh look at their lives and begin to behave differently, attracting new, suitable people.

Here are signs that without a psychologist it will be difficult for you to find true love:

You have an extremely negative family experience. Violence in the parental family.
You are strictly tied to one type and cannot even try to build relationships with other people.
You regularly meet partners with similar personalities and nothing works out with them.
The scenarios of all your relationships are very similar and end in failure the same way.
Each of your partners, no matter how different they are, uses humiliating, insulting, violent actions towards you.
You alienate all your partners with unreasonable demands, and commit humiliating, insulting, and violent actions towards them.
In every relationship you have, you do something that destroys it. You do this as if unconsciously, not on purpose.

If any of this applies to you, do not delay in contacting a psychologist, he will know how to help you.

What should you not do if you want to find love at 40 or more?

Using the wrong methods to find and find your soulmate can cause harm, or, at best, simply not give the desired result:

Trying to win the heart of the desired person using various occult and magical methods. Love spells, sugar spells, spells, tricks and hypnosis do not give true love. They can cause an attraction that breaks a person's will, but he will never love the one who tried to get him in this way. His soul will resist submission, and such a couple will be built on violence, which will not bring happiness to anyone.
Take the person you like away from the family if he already has a significant other. Higher powers punish such sin. In addition, a person who voluntarily abandoned his previous family will not be faithful in a new relationship - it will be just as easy to lead him away, because he has already demonstrated his tendency to cheat and break up.
To deify a person and try to buy his love with the help of a slavish attitude towards him. You cannot lose your personality and pride, you cannot agree to something that is categorically unpleasant for you just to receive love. Such a couple will never be happy, because true love necessarily includes mutual respect.
Blackmail a person, deceive, make him dependent on himself. These are negative methods that are often ineffective and are always punished by Higher powers.

It’s clear what you can’t do. But how then to find your love, your loved one at 30 and 40 years old?

Content

Where to begin
Advice from psychologist Daria Milai on how to find your soul mate for a girl
Steps
Practical advice for those who want to find a soul mate
What not to do
Where will the ideal meeting take place?
Advice for women
Recommendations for men
Warning

How to find your love at 30 - 40 years old? 5 working methods

There are truly working methods for finding love at any age, including after 40 years. There are few of them, and they are quite difficult, but their effectiveness compensates for everything:

Self-development and personal growth. The working law is that like attracts like. If you become an interesting, smart and bright person, the same people will be drawn to you, and it will be much easier to find true love among them. Read books and be interested in a variety of things, find exciting hobbies, develop your strengths and eliminate your weaknesses. People who are spiritually and intellectually developed have an incomparably greater chance of being happy in general, and in love as well. In addition, there is always something to talk about with them, and many couples begin with communication based on interests.
Realize why you need a soul mate and set a goal for yourself. Write down on paper your ideas about your loved one and family with him, analyze it. Having a clear goal makes it much easier to move towards it. It is important to think: do you have the same virtues that you want from your chosen one? Will such a person be interested in you? Work on yourself if the answers are negative. Don't worry if you're not up to that level right now. A huge number of shortcomings can be overcome.
Decide what exactly you want from your loved one. What qualities should he or she have, what should be most well and clearly demonstrated in him or her? What should never happen, what qualities and character traits will you never tolerate? It is important to think about this before starting your search.
Improve your appearance. No matter how beautiful your soul is and how interesting your inner world is, people choose their loved ones based on external characteristics. Over 80% of people are visual and love with their eyes - that's why this is so important. Forget about those who insulted your appearance, stop considering yourself ugly. Many handsome men and women literally “made themselves” from scratch through careful efforts. Sometimes it is enough just to acquire a beautiful body through physical activity, change clothes and hairstyle to start looking completely different. The initial data is not a verdict: playing sports, a stylish image, and careful personal hygiene will make any person at least attractive. In addition, work on your speech, facial expressions and gestures: everything should be attractive.
Don't forget about the principle of activity. You can hardly meet your love if you sit at home and only go out to work. Be in society, attend various events, take walks, you can communicate online in communities of interest. Be active in finding interesting and pleasant people. Do not refuse to meet and communicate with those you like because of some fears or pressures. Do not stop communication because something confused you in the dialogue; it is better to calmly discuss it and find out the motives for the person’s behavior. All this will significantly increase your chances of finding love as soon as possible.

If the search is not progressing, then the root cause is not understood. You need to figure out why this happens to you.

Try these methods, they really work. I know many people who have been helped by this!

Professional advice

How to recognize a deceiver

– When communicating on the Internet, you can easily run into a scammer or gigolo. And they know how to turn women’s craving for romance to their advantage: beautiful words, endless compliments, tearful stories. To avoid falling into the trap, it is better to use trusted sites and online communication groups, plus be careful not to reveal too much about yourself.

In personal communication, a liar can be betrayed by inconsistency between verbal and nonverbal signals: the body language of such people often contradicts their body language. On the Internet, you need to pay attention to logical inconsistencies and contradictions in stories about yourself. Trust your intuition: if it says “there’s something wrong with him,” then it probably is.

You should also be wary of violent declarations of love on a 1-2 date, promises that a person is clearly unable to fulfill, requests to borrow some money and offers to move in together as soon as possible.

Is there a second half?

It is completely wrong for some people to think that there is only one suitable person in the world. The story of the only “other half” is simply a myth created by the ancient philosopher Plato.

In fact, there are many people with whom you can build a happy relationship.

Throughout life, almost everyone constantly falls in love, starts families, gets divorced and rushes to look for new love. Every time it seems to them that the other half is already nearby. But everyone makes mistakes that ruin relationships.

As a result, people leave each other. But then a new person appears, even better, more suitable and closer.

Who do you usually like?

Many people, trying to find the love of their life, begin to wonder why some are loved, but not me. Sometimes a beautiful, smart girl is lonely, and her ugly friend is married to a loving man who carries her in his arms and generously gives her gifts. Why is that?

Of course, appearance and self-improvement are important, but they still love those people who are able to remain themselves, be sincere, show weakness and open their souls to another person. As a rule, such people know and accept their shortcomings, and therefore are more lenient towards their partner’s shortcomings.

How to become an attractive and feminine girl for men
How to find your soulmate - advice from professionals

How and where to invite a girl on a date

The acquaintance has taken place, the object of your sighs has given the go-ahead for communication, now you can go on the attack. Invite your new flame to meet and spend time together. Don't be shy, speak confidently and friendly. If she agreed, show joy and go get ready for the rendezvous. If the young lady refuses, do not persuade her - express slight regret and leave her alone. She might change her mind later and let you know.

Choose an interesting and stylish place where you will feel comfortable communicating. A movie or a noisy bar won't do; you need to get to know each other better, and not just sit next to each other.

Here are some original and unusual ideas for where to go with a girl on a first date.

Intellectual quizzes

Games like Quiz and What? Where? When? are gaining more and more popularity every day. It's fun, emotional and educational. At the same time, check the intellectual abilities of your chosen one, if, of course, this item is on the list of your criteria.

Quests

Also modern and interesting leisure time. Together you will solve riddles, solve puzzles, and complete tasks. You will be impressed for months to come.

Master classes in painting (cooking, music, dancing, etc.)

Joint activities always bring you closer together - take advantage of this. Learn something interesting and useful. Who knows, maybe you will be so captivated by a new activity that you and your girlfriend will decide to enroll in long-term courses.

Planetarium or observatory

Stars are mysterious and romantic. A girl will remember such a date for the rest of her life. Just don’t forget to check the weather forecast in advance so you don’t have to look through a telescope at a thick veil of clouds. And learn a couple of constellations to show off your knowledge in front of your chosen one.

Tasting of exotic dishes and drinks

Some modern trendy restaurants offer this service. There they bring you dishes the size of a five-ruble coin on huge plates and strange drinks in test tubes. Stylish and conceptual. The girl will be delighted - she will now have photos for Instagram six months in advance.

Expectations from love and relationships

When we start looking for a relationship partner or entering into a romantic relationship, many of us have a certain set of expectations. For example, how a person should look or behave, how relationships should develop, what roles each person should fulfill.

These expectations are based on family relationships, influences from friends, past experiences, and even portrayals in movies and television.

Holding on to these often unrealistic expectations can lead us to dismiss potential partners or become disillusioned with relationships.

What really matters?

You need to understand the difference between wants and needs in a partner. Desires can be discussed, but needs are not.

Desires can concern such things as profession, level of intelligence, physical characteristics such as height, weight and even hair color. But even if these things seem important at the beginning, over time you may realize that you were unnecessarily limiting your choices.

For example, you will realize that it is much more important to find:

An inquisitive, not a highly intelligent person. Curious people become smarter over time, but very smart people remain unclaimed if they lack curiosity.
Sensual, not sexual
Caring, not beautiful
A little mysterious, not bright
Humorous, not rich
From a family with similar values, rather than a specific ethnic and social background.