How to get out of the male friend zone and start dating

Recently, I once again came across a public page where boys post correspondence as girls friend-zone them.

My friend and I have been crazy about people from this public for a long time.

What a bunch of losers.

But I don’t think so because I’m the number one alpha male that any chick will give, no matter, even if she’s married with three children and happily married.

Not in this case.

It is clear that you will not be lucky with every girl in the world, and if someone says differently, get ready: he will sell you his seduction courses.

The thing is, if you have a good head on your shoulders, you won't end up in the friend zone.

Never.

The probability of such an event will be zero.

But for this you will have to cultivate in your head the right approach to business.

I know what's in the minds of these guys from the public. Each of those who post their failures publicly feels some kind of romance in it.

Unrequited love, sad songs and all that.

A bunch of boys who don't want to grow up.

When you look at the world with a cold male gaze, all this romance disappears, and you only have what you have - reality.

In reality, you either get what you want or you don't.

You don't feel sad about your failures like a little bitch.

It was - and it was.

You will not have suffering, there will be no unrequited love. You will have nothing but reality.

Listen carefully: people create drama for themselves because they are bored with life.

When you have nothing interesting in your life, you are not passionate about anything and you have nothing to do, then you subconsciously want to fill this emptiness.

And then some girl rejected you, and suddenly you turned from a boring and aimless oaf into a hopeless romantic, into Romeo, into a sufferer.

Do you feel how everything suddenly makes sense?

Add to this a couple of depressing songs about how “I love her, but she’s cold” - and you get people who have built their personality on the fact that they were rejected by a woman.

Brrr.

If this is what you want to do, then who am I to stop you?

But if you're fed up with all this and you don't want to be a pussy sufferer anymore, then I have good news for you.

I'll tell you how to get all this bullshit out of your head and never love unrequitedly.

Once you understand what I am about to tell you, your life will begin to change in amazing ways.

Slowly, you will begin to turn from a pussy sufferer into a steel piece of testosterone.

Someone who does not love you back cannot penetrate your heart.

You will be proud of yourself for stopping whining like a woman and looking at everything with a crystal clear gaze.

First, we'll talk about why you found yourself or may find yourself in the friend zone.

And then I'll tell you how to never get into the friend zone or get out of it if it's still possible.

How to get out of the friend zone and start dating. Top 10 ways for girls

It's still not very common for women to find a way to get out of the friend zone from a man they like. And that's good news; The bad thing is that due to the freshness of such a problem, it is difficult to find a way to solve it.

However, there are at least ten steps you can take to change your relationship status. All of them are aimed at making the young man discern the girl behind the image of “his boyfriend” with whom he is accustomed to communicate in your person.

• Don't talk to him about other girls. Avoid this topic, otherwise you will never become one of them and will remain in the role of a crying vest and a friendly shoulder.
• Look sexy. Get a fashionable hairstyle, wear moderate makeup, change jeans and T-shirts to dresses.
• Flirt and be flirty. This not only piques his interest, but also shows yours.
• Spend time alone and show him that you are great. It doesn’t have to be positioned as a date—friends can spend time with each other. Let it be a wonderful time that he will remember and want to repeat.
• Be more confident in yourself. Don’t cling to him too much, don’t seek constant approval, don’t make him the center of your life, don’t be shy. The freer you feel, the more attractive you look.
• Periodically say “if only I had a boyfriend...” in front of him. Continue the phrase with something enticing - for example, a promise to cook amazing breakfasts in the morning. It’s easier for him to want something that he’s learned about, including breakfast.
• Meet others. He shouldn't think that your whole life revolves around him. A little jealousy will make you more desirable, as will the knowledge that you are popular and have no shortage of fans.
• Don't burden him with your problems and don't ask for constant advice. Few people like whiners, and endless questions will give you away.
• Support. By chance or when he needs to speak out or get advice. Support is one of the important factors of intimacy, and we let people who provide it into a closer circle of friends.
• Talk about your feelings. If you have completed all the previous steps, but have not received results, act in the most direct way. Confess your love to a man and look at the result. When a person has already warmed up to you, this can be a decisive moment that will help them make a choice in your favor.

Cause jealousy

Be discreet, but not indifferent. Change tactics: do not demonstrate excessive affection or suffering from unrequited love. Imagine that you are friends not with the object of your passion, but with a man who is indifferent to you. He is an excellent conversationalist, nothing more.

Cut down on meetings with your crush, but continue to communicate with friends. As long as you are free, you are free to communicate with other men. If your current crush doesn't like it, note that you offered him a relationship.

If he complains to you about his girlfriends, respond by telling him about the other men you hang out with. A radical way is to pretend that you like the other guy. Be sure to admire your new acquaintance. This will give your lover mixed feelings. It happens that jealousy causes love.

What is a friend zone

The friend zone is the same situation when one wants a relationship, and the other refuses to provide it. It is from this imbalance and inequality that one can understand what the friend zone is in a relationship. This is its main difference from ordinary friendship, which distinguishes it as a separate type of interaction and gives it its own characteristic coloring.

In friendship, you are in an equal position , and no one has additional unrealized claims. This is a healthier relationship because no one is dependent on anyone and no one is manipulating anyone. In the case of the friend zone, there is always a “plus” who refuses a relationship, and a “minus” who seeks it. The first position is profitable and comfortable, while the second remains eternally dissatisfied and seeks more.

Living with a constant eye on another and with a need that is not satisfied is incredibly difficult, so psychologists advise not to linger at this point and one way or another to get out of the friend zone. It causes the “minus” a lot of suffering and does not allow him to live life to the fullest. In addition, the longer the “minus” tries, the less chance he has of getting what he wants.

There are two ways out: either break off the relationship with the person, or transfer it to another level - which is often difficult, but generally feasible.

Types of friend zones2

• Certain. This is when a friend honestly admits that he has no feelings for the girl and cannot offer anything other than friendship. The position is tough, but honest.

• Uncertain. When a friend keeps her lovestruck boyfriend in limbo and diligently marinates. She enjoys keeping a guy on a short leash and using him for her own purposes. This behavior is very selfish, as it does not allow the person in love to overcome addiction and build other relationships. The position is cunning and selfish.
• Hidden. This can be called the friend zone, in which there is a person in love who is afraid to reveal his feelings with both his appearance and his gaze. Therefore, the object of his adoration is not even aware of the emotions that are raging within him. The position is deadlocked.

How to understand that you are in his friend zone: 10 signs

In relationships, it is sometimes difficult to determine the format. If you doubt what is happening, do not know what the male friend zone means, what it looks like and how to define it, check the list of its markers.

• He does not see you alone or does so rarely and does not seek one-on-one meetings.
• He shares personal things with you and is not shy about discussing other girls and relationships with them.
• He's genuinely interested in your personal life the way a girlfriend might be, and tries to introduce you to his friends if you don't have anyone.
• He doesn't do anything romantic.
• He does not try to get closer and keeps the relationship at an established distance.
• When he shows care, helps or supports, he acts the way your mother, friend or brother might.
• He says “you’re like a sister to me,” “you’re a great friend,” or “I wish I had a girl like you.”
• He is confused by attempts to add more physical contact and does not respond to them.
• He doesn't flirt.
• If he asks for your help, it never turns out to be romantic.

Why did I end up in the friend zone?

Understanding why a guy friendzones you can often be very difficult. There can be many reasons, and this situation cannot always be explained at all.

But I will give you the 10 most common ones:

• When you met, he had a girlfriend.
• He knows your boyfriend or ex.
• He is moving away from past relationships and does not look at girls as partners.
• You met in a big company.
• He treated you like a friend right away.
• When he wanted to date you, you were not alone. Now his feelings have exhausted themselves.
• He sees some trait in you that he is not ready to see in his girlfriend.
• He likes your girlfriend.
• He is not looking for a relationship at this moment.
• He is afraid of losing you if your relationship doesn't work out.

Consciously assess the situation

CONTENT:

Men friendzoning women is rare, but it does happen. Even recognized smart and beautiful women experienced situations when they fell in love, but in response they received cold words: “let’s remain friends,” “I wouldn’t want to spoil our friendship,” “you are a sister to me.” So the lovely creatures found themselves “overboard” from serious relationships.

When a woman sends her boyfriend to the friend zone, he can easily get out of there, winning his heart with his beloved care and warmth. If a guy tells a girl that she is his best friend, it means he has added her to his “eternal friends list.” Psychologists say that it is much more difficult for a girl to leave the friend zone. This process is complex, but feasible. Recognize this so you can choose the right behavior.

How to avoid getting into the friend zone

There is no single formula or universal strategy that, following it, would explain how to avoid falling into the friend zone.

Every relationship, whether friendly or romantic, is somehow different and unique. You can follow a few rules, but applying them without adapting them to your own story may not help.

• Be romantic.
• Flirt, flirt, and leave things unsaid, even if your relationship is not yet romantic.
• Surprise and act unexpectedly.
• Meet not only in company, but also in private.
• Do something with a hint of romance yourself: less obvious than a candlelit date, but brighter than buying a glass of coffee. A small but thoughtful gift will do.
• Take care of your appearance.
• Ask what kind of girls he likes, what he values ​​in women.
• Don't give too much if he's looking for interaction - be it physical contact, time together, or communication. This will help maintain interest and motivate you to take further steps towards the relationship.
• Show interest: in his activities or hobbies. Ask him to teach you something simple that he can do.
• Promote yourself. Unobtrusively. Demonstrate the advantages, but easily - treat him to a dish of your own making, boast about your work achievements, systematically show your taste in clothes and style with your own appearance.

How to get into it: don't do it

• Don't share too much: Don't share everything about your life.
• Do not exploit the young man as an assistant in household chores and other everyday matters.
• Don't define him solely as the first one's friend.
• Don't let them talk about other girls.
• Don't talk about young people.
• Don't shorten the distance too quickly.
• Do not do what is customary to do in a relationship until it is established as a romantic one.
• Don't get close to his friends.
• Don't behave like a friend, leave more space for imagination and maneuver.
• Don't introduce him to your friends until you start dating.

How to understand that you have left the friend zone

We’ve figured out how you can get out of a guy’s friend zone. How do you understand that everything went well and you are no longer a friend? It’s worth remembering here that there is more than one way out of the friend zone . The main parameter is that your relationship has changed, and these are tangible changes. Another question is how exactly they changed.

Perhaps you have begun to pay significantly less attention to the man - this means that you are leaving the friend zone voluntarily, having decided that this format of relationship is too painful, and the chosen one is not worth the effort and changes. Fully leaving such a toxic relationship takes time , but starting it is the hardest part, so you are on the right path, even if things look confusing right now. Such an ending does not always mean that you will never cross paths again or say a word to each other.

By the way, the situation may change: later he will begin to show sympathy for you, or you will have a young man, and interaction with that man on a friendly level will no longer be painful. It all depends on the feelings of both participants at the next contact, if any.

Perhaps you achieved what you wanted, and the man felt attracted to you. This is easy to notice by the change in his behavior: he seeks your company, tries to please, takes the initiative into his own hands and does something romantic.

Guys don't know how to pretend, so you can easily understand that a guy likes you, you just need to notice it. Even if you have not yet decided that you are dating, at this moment you can already celebrate your victory. By the fact that a man begins to treat you differently, you can unmistakably recognize the transition of a relationship from friendly to romantic.

Another option is that your relationship has cooled down, but you have not stopped communicating. Now you are not a friend, but a buddy - and this is also a way out of the friend zone . If you perceive the person more coldly and no longer claim what he refuses to give you, you have also succeeded. And there is nothing wrong with this option: you saw that there is something to value a person for, and you did not forget about your own value. In some cases, such a turn of events even helps the chosen one look at you with fresh eyes and unexpectedly notice a beautiful girl, but you should not count on this option. Honesty both to yourself and to the man is the main trump card of this strategy.

Disappear for a while

You have created a comfort zone for the object of your adoration: humor, self-irony, free gifts, surprises and unconditional help. Limit your presence in his life. Keep romance to a minimum unless there is a reason for it. From time to time, ignore his calls, and then call back yourself and say that you were busy. You will see that there are men around who are worthy of your attention.

Take him to a place where you feel like a fish in water. Let your lover feel like a stranger in a new society. After disappearing for a short time, come to his aid: show romanticism and put him in the best light.

Advice! Find a way to cheer up your lover, feel inspired, then leave. Try to disappear from his life, dissolve, disappear into nowhere. Make him want to see you more often.

When to Back Off and Find a New Guy

Efforts to get out of the friend zone do not always lead to positive results - and this is worth keeping in mind. If you forget about this factor, you risk spending a lot of time and effort on someone else's life instead of your own, trying to please a person who has not paid enough attention to you. Instead, go to the dating site Badoo and look for a partner of your choice.

The longer you know a person as a friend, the more difficult it will be to move the relationship to a romantic level - after all, he is used to seeing you in a different role. In addition, if for a long time you have satisfied him in this particular role, he has no motivation to change anything, he will have to be provoked and motivated.

As soon as you feel that you are putting too much energy into this task or straying too far from your comfort levels, it’s time to consider whether the game is worth the candle. Do you really want to change your appearance and style, habits and views for the sake of the attention of the guy you like? Think carefully, because there are many people around who will like you without all these changes.

Long unsuccessful attempts also lead to failure. If you’ve been trying to get a person’s attention for several months now, but he doesn’t give it despite your efforts, give up this idea. Don't think that he doesn't see your exploits. Most likely, he simply doesn’t care about them. With indifference comes pity and discomfort - he feels pressure and therefore perceives you less and less as a potential girlfriend.

Choose a strategy

There are 2 ways to exit:

1. The first option is slow, routine work. But the work can give a lasting and positive result. If your lover reciprocates, then get ready for a romantic relationship.
2. The second option is recognition, which implies quick and radical action. The way ends either badly or well.

Ask yourself a clear question: does the guy know that I’m in love with him? Talk to him directly, but firmly: we are either dating or we are not. If a negative answer follows, there is nothing left to do but keep your word - you will need to leave your friend and leave.

Bottom line

I explained what to do if a girl is friendzoned by her boyfriend, and now you have ideas on how to turn from boyfriend to girlfriend. But don’t forget that the friend zone is a toxic thing, and in any case you shouldn’t stay in it for a long time.

Approach the issue with passion, try to play with taking the relationship to a new level. Be more romantic, think over your appearance, flirt, intrigue, and have fun with it. But if you don’t succeed, don’t forget to choose the best dating site in time and switch to another person so as not to waste time and energy on someone who won’t appreciate it.