It's not just children who are prone to anxiety. According to statistics, more than 20% of the world's population experience various restrictions in their lives due to fears. The occurrence of this phenomenon is associated with an ancient biological reaction, and people began to ask the question of how to overcome fear back in ancient times.
Experts say that active inclusion of the brain consciousness can resist it. But first things first.
Parable of Fear
One man wandered around the world. On the way he encountered a plague. The man asked her where she was going. To which the plague replied that it was going to the neighboring village to destroy a thousand lives. They broke up, and a month later they met again. A man with claims told the plague that it deceived him and took five thousand human lives. The plague replied that it did not lie, but actually carried away a thousand, all other people died without its participation, just from fear.
People are afraid of heights, darkness, terrible dreams, loneliness, driving a car, flying and many other things that might not be afraid. Why? What happens to a person? What is fear? Are there ways to overcome fear?
Mandala coloring
This method is widely used in resolving many conflict situations. Instead of sorting things out or focusing on the source of fear, you can spend your time productively. This is a kind of meditation that needs to be done regularly. Coloring a mandala not only prevents the accumulation of stress, but also helps to free yourself from everyday unpleasant experiences. You can devote a lot of time to this activity, even several hours. If you can, spend at least 20-30 minutes a day. This will be quite enough to free yourself from disturbing experiences. Coloring a mandala can be turned into an everyday ritual that will help relax the emotional sphere. In modern reality, such relaxation therapy cannot be superfluous. By coloring mandalas, there is a high chance that you will begin to realize the reasons for your daily actions and actions.
Read about conflicting relationships.
Fear - what is it?
Fear is an internal state caused by a threatening real or perceived disaster. From a psychological point of view, it is considered a negatively colored emotion.
It occurs every day in life. We go to work, do household chores, visit shops and theaters, where something can happen that can frighten us, so how should we fight fear and is it necessary?
We are born, begin to breathe, scream and be afraid at the same time. This phenomenon haunts us all our lives. And for many people it limits the freedom, poisons their lives, destroys both body and soul. And no one likes to experience this feeling. And it is impossible not to experience it.
There are unique people in the world who know neither fear nor horror. But this is a rare disease, as a result of which the amygdala of the brain, which is responsible for this feeling, stops working for unknown reasons. Man is not afraid of anything, not even death. It is impossible to say whether it is a gift or a disadvantage, but a person has fearlessness.
If you think about it, fearlessness is not so good, since a person is exposed to serious dangers that he is not even aware of, he does not know what to fear, and, therefore, does not think about how to deal with fears.
This condition destroys us, but at the same time it plays a positive role, both in the life of an individual and the whole society. Fear warns a person about danger, teaches what needs to be avoided, that is, warns. But if a person is covered by a wave, then the person may succumb to panic.
Cultivate positive emotions
According to one of the pioneers of positive psychology, Martin Seligman, increasing pleasant emotions helps to cope with anxiety. To do this, learn to savor pleasure:
- Slow down the pace of work.
- Resist the urge to get distracted by vain activities, such as surfing the Internet.
- Take time to feel the satisfaction of your accomplishments.
- Stop wanting more all the time.
- Devote more time to things that captivate you and fill your life with meaning.
The more positive emotions you experience, the less room there is for anxious thoughts and debilitating fears.
Techniques for dealing with fear
Many psychologists argue that the question of how to deal with fears can be dealt with in one simple way - this is to stop even thinking about how to overcome fear, that is, stop saving yourself from it. While we think about what we are afraid of, we, losing our energy, only think about this.
For example, a common fear, especially among women, is the fear of driving. Before they even start taking the exam, they are already thinking about how to overcome their fear of driving. Thus, they program themselves for this fear.
How to overcome fear? It's pretty simple. Motivation helps everything. Don’t want to wait for hours for public transport, and then have to jostle around in it, while constantly being late for meetings or work? So you need to make your life easier and learn to drive a car. This is the only thing you need to think about. Thoughts are occupied by motivation; motivation leaves no room for the question of how to overcome fear. The equipment works flawlessly.
Tune in for the best
90% of people who suffer from fears set themselves up for them. For example, many people are afraid to fly. They don’t yet know what to be afraid of, but they are already afraid.
How to overcome this type of fear? You need to build a flight plan within yourself, that is, what interesting things you can do during the flight. Read books, get some sleep, and in the end, while doing these activities, you won’t even notice how you’ll find yourself in the right place. This will be a painless and effective overcoming of fear.
You can imagine inside yourself a small, frightened child who definitely needs to be calmed down. Positive emotions and memories, ideas of a good fairy who calms the inner child and shows beautiful pictures - all this occupies the brain and helps to overcome fear.
Breathing exercises
You need to admit to yourself that you are really afraid that everything inside is shrinking, creating discomfort. How to overcome fear and get rid of discomfort? In order to relax yourself, you can focus your attention on your breathing and restore it.
Then try to carry out actions from the body to consciousness. Intentionally turn your shoulders, start massaging any points, it is not necessary to know the massage technique, just massage, while focusing on the sensations in the body.
Getting rid of internal dialogue
Most often we are frightened by our inner voice. How to overcome the fear that comes from internal dialogue? This voice is subject to us, and we must use our power over it. You can change his intonation or make him speak in a whisper or too fast, you can even make him speak from his little toe. It is impossible to take such a voice seriously and overcoming fear will become easy and even fun.
Our imagination portrays us as very small against the background of circumstances, so we cannot always understand how to deal with such a big fear, which is much larger than us. You need to mentally place dangerous circumstances in an absurd situation.
For example, make the situation small, place it in a saucepan and cover with a lid. This will be an interesting solution to the question of how to overcome fear. It is important to believe that we know how to overcome fear, and no matter how we do it.
“Memorable incident” technique
What types of fear a person experiences depends on what methods to combat fears. If someone offended you, you were afraid of a dog, an unpleasant action was performed on you, as a result, a lump of fear remains inside you, the information about which is well known to you, that is, you know very well about the source of fear, which means the subconscious has written it down in some block remember this incident.
Naturally, a similar situation will always scare you. How to deal with such fears? You just need to imagine yourself in a cinema, on the screen of which there is a film about the circumstance that happened to you. You need to mentally roll the upper left corner of the screen into a tube, after which a new screen will appear, where almost the same actions take place, but with a successful outcome. By replacing bad actions in your subconscious three times with positive or even humorous ones, you can erase unpleasant events from your memory.
When a person laughs at something, there can be no fear; it arises only in an acute and serious situation. Over time, you will be able to notice that a funny story has been written in your subconscious instead of a scary situation, and in reality such a situation will no longer frighten you.
A quick way out of a depressing state
There are many techniques for working with fears. They can be suppressed, burned, recoded, or worked with beliefs. There is one technique that can bring you out of a state of momentary horror. You just need to remember what it is. This is a small ball of energy that may have arisen from nowhere. The purpose of this lump is one - to make sure that this condition does not happen again.
For example, you saw an accident, and now you are afraid of getting into the same situation, or you are afraid of being left without food, since you once experienced hunger (this applies to the older generation who experienced hunger), you can be afraid of the future, old age or death. These concerns are not always justified. Our subconscious does not distinguish between real events and what we can imagine.
We must convince ourselves that fear is not harmful, but useful, it activates our psyche, mobilizes us to protect ourselves from danger. And if he is so good, then we need to thank him for his good functions.
As soon as horror takes hold of you, you must understand where in the body it is located. You need to try to localize this place and imagine its image. Even if it looks like a dirty gray lump. You need to direct your kind energy to this lump with all the words of gratitude for his care. Fear, filled with warm energy, transforms into its opposite. Calm and self-confidence will appear within you.
Get enough sleep
The quality and quantity of sleep has a significant impact on a person’s psychological state. With a constant lack of sleep, negative emotions appear more often, distrust of others, aggression and anxiety grow. To avoid this:
- Choose a comfortable sleep mode and its amount (minimum 7 hours).
- Try to go to sleep and wake up at about the same time every day.
- At least an hour before bedtime, do not use your phone or other gadgets.
- Create wake-up rituals (a pleasant alarm melody, exercise, a delicious breakfast).
Hormones of fear
The symptoms of anxiety and terror are the same for everyone. But we all behave differently in critical situations. Some know how to control themselves, others look scared, and others are close to panic.
Scientific research has shown that danger causes the release of two stress hormones, such as:
- Adrenaline (rabbit hormone), which is produced in cowardly animals.
It dilates the blood vessels of the brain, but constricts the blood vessels of the skin. We are used to hearing that the face turns gray with fear. From its ejection, the pulse quickens and breathing accelerates. People are lost with the prevailing “rabbit” hormone, horror leads them into a stupor. People do not overcome fear, but surrender themselves to fate, and often their fate ends in tears.
- Norepinephrine (the lion hormone) is predominantly produced in predators and is absent in their prey.
This hormone has completely different symptoms. The blood vessels dilate, the face turns red. The presence of this hormone characterizes the stability of the nervous system to stress and determines the physical and mental stability of the body. The norepinephrine type of people automatically fight fear; they can instantly mobilize in dangerous situations, easily overcoming them. At the same time, they can perform actions that do not always fit into the framework of possibilities.
Fear is good because it forces us to look for unknown resources within us. So he reminds us that it is impossible to become the master of the situation today with the set of opportunities that we have.
Therefore, experts argue about the harm and benefits of this phenomenon, about its destructive or creative influence. They argue about how to deal with fear and whether it is worth doing. No one can give a definite answer to these questions. And most importantly, no one has solved the mystery of how this phenomenon arises when it settles in our bodies, whether this feeling is innate or acquired.
Researchers conducted an experiment in which they found that children under one year old are not afraid of terrible pictures, but already in two-year-old children, scary images caused anxiety. It turns out that fear comes to us with the negative experience that we receive from the world around us.
Some of the universal human fears may be from childhood experience, and the other part is rewritten programs of parental experience, called scripts, when hidden programs are inherited.
To be honest
Many people have the habit of hiding their own weaknesses from themselves. This approach to life might seem funny and ridiculous if it were not so widespread. The formed habit of telling the truth will help remove fear and anxiety. You need to take this as a rule, literally cultivate it in yourself. First of all, you need to learn not to lie to yourself. Only then can you learn to be frank in front of other people. You should not be afraid to admit your mistakes. There's nothing wrong with that. Besides, they always teach us something. After all, this is how the ability to discover the available internal resources in oneself is formed. To be frank means to be open and not to withdraw into oneself at the first sign of failure. It should be noted that frankness is the greatest gift that few can boast of. The majority is still inclined to try to justify their actions with something, to look for those to blame on the side. Few, unfortunately, have the courage to be able to look inside themselves and draw certain conclusions.
Why we are afraid: the meaning of fears
Psychologists say that fear is a phenomenon of an acute emotional reaction caused by events or circumstances in the outside world.
Moreover, the circumstances could be both real and unreal, hence the ways to combat fear are figured out. As a result, the basis is a threat to human existence, both biological and social.
Psychologists distinguish several aspects of fear: apprehensions, fears, frights and horrors. But they are all divided into external factors and internal states, that is, they can be objective or subjective.
Before figuring out how to overcome fear, you need to understand that fear is a constant defensive reaction of the human body, it is a warning to the human consciousness regarding a threatening situation.
And it will be much easier to overcome fear if we accept it as a defense. But there are more serious situations when overcoming fear begins with understanding its root cause.
Meditate
Meditation techniques: Freepick
Yoga, meditation, breathing exercises are great for calming the mind, relaxing and relieving anxiety. By meditating for at least 10 minutes every day, create an inner space, a kind of “fortress” that will allow you to step back from the situation, calm down and develop a reaction to certain events.
How to get rid of constant anxiety? Do the following:
- Choose a meditation that you like (body awareness, sound, emotions).
- Choose a time to practice and do it regularly.
Fears in modern life
We live in a very complex information world. And the unrealistic amount of information coming to us today is strikingly different from what people received in the era of Jesus Christ. Then, during the entire life cycle of a person, only six events occurred when decisions had to be made. We have to do this every day and more than once, and at the same time fight fear.
Experts say that psychologically and biologically we are no different from people of past eras. Therefore, it is difficult for us to cope with the stresses of the external environment; we experience an adaptation shock, since it is extremely difficult for us to streamline the avalanche of semantic and emotional information that falls upon us.
The nervous system of each of us experiences daily stress, so psychologists and psychotherapists today are seriously studying the question: “how to overcome fear for a modern person.”
Psychotherapist Fritz Perls said that the nervous system must chew what is happening in life, then swallow it and then digest it. Accordingly, all fears are not chewed or swallowed pieces of information.
Switch to physical activity
Long periods of sitting still at your desk can cause significant stress. It is important to periodically switch from one type of activity to another - to move from mental stress to physical activity.
When you exercise, more oxygen reaches your brain, which helps it recover. With mental stress, the muscular system is restored.
Alternating work processes with light physical activity improves metabolic processes in the body, accelerates the rehabilitation of the nervous system, and helps strengthen it.
Myth of the ancient Greeks
Since ancient times, people have known that this phenomenon has a dual nature. Among the ancient Greeks, this knowledge was expressed in the myth of the god Pan (hence the word “panic”). He was born with goat limbs, horns and a beard. His appearance was terrifying, but besides this, he screamed loudly, which terrified people. Pan once directed this gift for good; he terrified the army of the Persians who attacked the Greeks; they did not know how to overcome fear and fled cowardly.
This is just a myth, but in reality, scientists tested volunteers to study the nature and effects of this phenomenon on them in extreme situations. They were jumping from heights. At the time of the test, neurons in the tonsils of the brain were activated in the volunteers. This is called anxiety.
The body immediately reacts to the phenomenon. We all know the feeling of our heart jumping out of our chest; we immediately remember that fear has large eyes, but in reality the pupils dilate. In addition, our mouth becomes dry because the activity of the digestive glands decreases. Such sensations are present in each of us, but the fight against fear is different for everyone.
Useful books
If you want to approach the problem thoroughly and study it thoroughly, here is a list of books that will help with this:
- “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living,” Dale Carnegie;
- “Taming Fear”, Vladimir Levi;
- “Happy life without panic attacks and fears”, Pavel Fedorenko;
- “The wisdom of fear. How to understand and overcome your fear?”, Vitaly Pichugin.
Finally, watch this funny cartoon - it will make you look at your fears from a different angle.
Treatment of childhood phobias
Special techniques have been developed to correct children's fears.
Parents' participation in the developed games is a must as they will need to act properly and gently to quell all the fears that their children have.
The entire course consists of 30 exercises. The main objectives of such classes are:
- gain social trust from the child;
- overcome feelings of fear, doubt, shyness and other phobias;
- develop inner freedom;
- help get rid of negative experiences.
Children's fears are treated correctively and almost always for a long time, not only in specialized centers, but also at home. Having such a course with all the activities in your hands, you can independently help your child stop being afraid.
These simple methods are also used in the autonomous prevention of fears in children. It is important that the parents are sufficiently psychologically autonomous, then the child will copy their behavioral principles and strategies.
Symptoms
A pathological reaction of the body worsens a person’s quality of life and negatively affects relationships in the family and at work. The life of a person living in a world of constant experiences becomes limited, constrained and meager.
At an advanced stage, fear completely covers a person’s consciousness and drives him into a stupor. As a result of such a reaction, a person develops serious disorders not only in the psyche, but also in physiology. The main symptoms of phobias:
- blood pressure destabilization;
- deep depression;
- adrenaline rush;
- in women - premature onset of menstruation;
- stomach upset;
- dryness and lump in the mouth;
- constant panic attacks;
- cardiopalmus;
- trembling of limbs;
- paleness of the skin;
- deterioration of general condition;
- increased sweating.
These signs appear in almost all types of fear. Having discovered them in yourself, you need to take action to eradicate the problem. Whether these symptoms appear partially or completely depends on the person’s physiology, as well as his or her characteristics of responding to stressful situations.
Definition of disorder
A person who constantly lives with a phobia becomes insecure: he is afraid of any emergencies, changes in life, sudden developments of good or bad events. Constant fears prevent him from living and developing fully. Often people with bouts of fear become failures in life - they begin to fear everything that happens around them.
Two types of phobias are characteristic of childhood:
- fear of falling from a height;
- fear of loud sounds.
In adults, this reaction of the body can be varied. To overcome fear, a person first needs to determine the cause of its occurrence.
In itself, such a reaction to danger is adequate. This is a kind of protective barrier that helps a person protect himself and others from the negative impact of external factors. There is no need to fight him. Fear, which prevents a person from living and working normally and contributes to serious mental disorders, must be eradicated.
Increased self-esteem
Another effective technique for overcoming fear is to consciously increase self-esteem. If a person has a fear of communication, he may catch himself thinking certain negative thoughts about himself. Having failed to overcome the barrier and approach a person to start a conversation, we tend to reproach ourselves, saying phrases in our heads, for example, “I’m a loser,” “I’m a weakling,” “no one needs a weak person like me.” Such thoughts have an extremely negative impact on our perception of ourselves.
You should encourage yourself. You need to mentally say: “Even though it’s hard for me to overcome this barrier now, to start a conversation, I can do it. I am an interesting conversationalist. People want to communicate with me." Even if you can’t decide to have a conversation the first time, over time a person will be able to overcome his fear. This feeling is like jumping off a diving board. Looking down into the water, the man is afraid to jump. However, in flight, he already forgets about his fear. The same thing happens with other fears. The fear is much greater until the moment a person decides to take action.
