Development of communication skills

Social networks, computer games, interactive chats and a variety of instant messengers that allow people to communicate simply by clicking on the sensors of their gadgets - just a few decades ago, all this might have seemed like science fiction. But today this is our reality, and such things will no longer surprise anyone. Undoubtedly, the development of technology significantly and many times improves human life, making it more comfortable, convenient, and simpler. But at the same time, this medal also has a downside.

All our acquaintances, friends and colleagues can easily be placed in a small contact window, dialogues, business and intimate conversations take the form of chats, and emotions are expressed with colorful emoticons. And at the same time, for us, and especially for the younger generation, the problem of socialization is becoming increasingly relevant, and more specifically, the problem of developing communication skills, i.e. developing communication skills - real interaction with other people.

Stool syndrome

A person is included in communication with his own kind from the moment of birth. Therefore, all our basic communication skills are formed at a “preconscious” age. Our usual methods of communication are very quickly automated and become stereotyped. And over the years, it may turn out that the skills formed in childhood “lag behind” and do not correspond to new communicative tasks and situations of adult life.

Here's a simple example. One of the basic communication skills is self-presentation - introducing yourself to your communication partner(s). Self-presentation involves measured and selective self-disclosure

That is, it is important not to dump all the shocking details about “your loved one” on your interlocutors, but to provide exactly as much information as is necessary to form a positive impression of you and (most importantly!) to achieve the goal of communication

Now imagine, say, the boy Vasya, who grew up with “stool syndrome.” “Stool syndrome” (this is a comic name, not a scientific term) occurs in children whose parents in every possible way cultivate their giftedness (even if it is actually absent) and demonstrate it to others. If guests come to such a family, the parents immediately loudly announce: “And now our Vasenka will read a poem / play the violin / sing!” After which Vasenka finds herself in the center of everyone’s attention (she stands on a real or hypothetical stool) and demonstrates her talents to everyone.

Gradually, the child develops the following attitude: “I must begin communication by demonstrating my talents, I must delight everyone and be the center of everyone’s attention.” How useful do you think such a communication skill would be during, say, important business negotiations? Surely you are familiar with similar characters who, instead of focusing on the matter at hand, “pull the blanket over themselves”

They are ready to do anything, even disrupt negotiations, just to draw attention to their person. Such people do not possess the skill of self-presentation at a conscious level, stereotypically reproducing the “stool syndrome” formed in childhood.

8 Basic Communication Skills:

Orientation in a communication situation (including understanding of goals, roles, motivation of participants).
Establishing contact, starting communication (and a symmetrical skill - ending communication).
Self-presentation.
Receiving information from the interlocutor (active and passive listening, using questions, reading “body language”, etc.).
Providing information (presentation).
Emotional regulation and self-regulation.
Psychological influence (persuasion, suggestion) and resistance to influence.
Providing feedback.

Of course, there are also more complex communication skills, such as those related to negotiations or public speaking in front of a large audience. But without sufficient mastery of basic communication skills, mastering higher-level skills/abilities will be problematic.

Improving your communication skills

If you previously thought that becoming one of those with brilliant communication skills was difficult, then you were very, very wrong. In fact, any problem has its own solution, often quite simple, if only you had the desire to look for it.

Know how to set specific communication tasks in relation to your partners

Are you striving for conscious and effective communication? Choose suitable emotionally motivating tasks. The fact is that it is much easier to influence any person through his emotional sphere.

Of course, you shouldn’t show your emotions too violently, it may not show you from the best side, but the ability to establish emotional contact has always been the main characteristic of the best communicators. Therefore, determine what kind of result you want to get from the conversation and decide on the right emotions.

Learn to ignore psychological barriers

Internal barriers arise in the process of communication quite often, and everything would be fine, but they are one of the main obstacles to fruitful communication

But so that nothing bothers you, concentrate on what is important to you during the communication process

Know how to manage the communication process

Forget for a while about logical steps in communication - if you are constantly busy calculating the need for this or that action, then you simply will not have time left to achieve the goal that you have set for yourself.

Of course, you are unlikely to be able to “feel” the communication the first time; at first you simply cannot do without training. But then you will be able to understand the mood of your interlocutor without any problems and figure out whether he is making contact with you.

Know how to be charming

Of course, you have more than once encountered people who, without any problems, get everything they need from communication, and all thanks to charisma. You don’t need to think that charisma is an exclusively innate quality, it is quite possible to develop it, for this you should allow your imagination to take flight and free your inner life.

Know how to remove psychophysical clamps

Constrained or overly loose body movements will immediately signal to your interlocutor that you also have psychophysical constraints. He may not be able to clearly identify the nature of your condition, but he will immediately understand that something is wrong with you. Accordingly, the success of your communication will be in big question. So relax and, of course, train.

Why develop communication skills?

What is special about a sociable interlocutor? First of all, such a person loves to communicate. He enjoys the process of communication, tries to learn something new, he meets new people, gets a positive experience and teaches his interlocutor something.

The ability to communicate allows you to successfully build life priorities. After all, flexibility, loyalty in conversation, and understanding of the interlocutor help achieve the final goal.

If you develop these skills, then you may well become a leader in any team, you will be able to achieve promotion on the career ladder, and learn to show initiative in various issues.

An interesting and sociable person is always noticed; he becomes the epicenter of everyone's attention.

Look at the entertainment TV presenters. They are always sociable and open. They understand when it is appropriate to joke or ask this or that question.

Books on developing communication skills

Patrick King “How to Improve Your Communication Skills” is a best-selling book from an American director and screenwriter that will help you improve your communication skills and change toxic destructive attitudes and habits when communicating with other people. Other useful books on developing communication skills:

“How to Talk to Anyone” by M. Rhodes. Many people have difficulties when communicating: fear of starting a conversation, lack of confidence and low self-esteem. The author pays great attention to overcoming all these psychological barriers in oneself. “I can hear right through you. Effective negotiation techniques" M Goulston. Speaking beautifully and convincingly in order to attract the attention of your interlocutor is an art, and the ability to listen is aerobatics. People love to be listened to and are grateful when their interlocutor listens to them sincerely and with interest, and in return they will listen to you with great pleasure. “Secrets of communication. The magic of words" J. Borg. Very often a person in his speech uses words that “stick” to him and wander from conversation to conversation; by these words you can determine what kind of person is in front of you

It is important to start monitoring your speech and choosing the right words to communicate. The book contains many practical exercises. "Substantive conversation

The art of communication for those who want to get their way” S. Scott. The author teaches constructive communication skills and encourages you to give up empty chatter, during which time and energy are lost. “Never eat alone. And other rules of networking” K. Ferrazzi, T. Rez. The book was written for businessmen, but will be useful for reading by the general public. The author teaches how to develop an adult's communication skills and build constructive relationships with people around him using a proven step-by-step strategy.

Personal communication abilities: psychology and period of development

Communication abilities begin to develop in a person almost immediately after birth. It is believed that the sooner a baby learns to talk, the easier it will be for him to interact with the people around him.

An individual’s communication abilities are formed strictly individually. There are quite a lot of factors influencing their development: these include relationships with parents and relatives, later with peers, with colleagues and management. In addition, the general social role of a person in society is also important.

Games that develop sociability.

joint games of children You can start developing communication skills in children from a very early age, when the baby is already able to express a response to what is happening. The simplest games can help with this, and favorite toys: bears, bunnies will be excellent helpers in developing a child’s communication skills. The simplest thing is to talk with the child on behalf of the doll. Having gotten used to such conversations, the baby will not shy away from communication. If there is an opportunity to play group games, then this will be an excellent incentive to develop liberation and, as a result, sociability. In such classes, children have the opportunity to communicate with each other in a playful way. Game “Getting Acquainted” Participants sit in a circle and take turns introducing themselves, with each next first repeating what the previous one said, adding their own introduction afterwards. For example: – I’m Katya, I have a favorite cat Musya, I like to play with her .– Katya has a favorite cat, Musya, she loves to play with her. My name is Dima, I like cars and transformers, my dad and I play together. – Katya has a cat, Musya, and she plays with her. Dima loves to play with cars and with dad. I'm Anya, my mother and I went to the zoo, and I liked the hippopotamus the most. This game not only helps develop communication skills, but also trains memory.

games with a child

Examples of tests to assess communication skills

Below we provide 3 examples of situational tests to assess communication skills with an explanation of the answers.

The first example is a test for managers.

The second example is a test for office staff.

The third example is a test for a sales manager.

You can learn more about situational tests for all professional competencies in our special articles:

Psychological tests for employment and the qualities they test

Tests and assessments for sales managers

Psychological tests for managers

Psychometric testing for call center and customer service specialists

Emotional intelligence tests - what are they, examples, recommendations for solutions

How to improve your skills

Completing specialized training will help you develop your communication skills, where practicing models of life situations, even in the event of an error, will not entail irreparable consequences, as happens in life. Professional mentors will help you learn how to resolve conflicts, develop persuasive speech, acquire effective self-presentation skills, and increase the credibility of your words.

In a group of like-minded people, there is an opportunity to creatively approach solving communication problems, test different ways of influencing the interlocutor, use different roles and play out necessary situations. The training course provides a range of techniques and exercises that can be applied in specific situations.

Once you get the first results from the methods in real life, move on to more complex and sophisticated communication options. To achieve greater efficiency, you can practice your communication skills in the company of friends and family.

What will the man of the future be like?

Photo: People photo created by rawpixel.com - www.freepik.com
In 2016, the President of the World Economic Forum in Davos, Klaus Schwab, announced the beginning of the Fourth Technological Revolution. Its result will be total robotization. To remain a sought-after specialist, a person of the future must:

solve complex problems;
think critically;
think creatively;
manage people;
work in a team;
recognize the emotions of colleagues and your own, control them;
form judgments and make decisions;
focus on the client and partner;
negotiate;
quickly switch from one task to another.

“The 4K System is now gaining popularity. Its concepts include critical thinking, creativity, communication and coordination. The last two points are closely related. The ability to negotiate, determine a common goal and ways to achieve it, distribute roles and evaluate the result is needed now. If you fail to find an approach to your interlocutor, you can easily lose a key partner.”

Healthy lifestyle

Everyone wants to be healthy. Right? For me, for example, the goal is not just to be healthy, but also to have enough energy. Plus look good.

Example. I played football for 11 years and then gave it up. My weight went from 65 to 86 kilograms in less than 9 months. I became fat. For anyone who once boasted great abs, this is frustrating. So I decided to do two things:

find a suitable diet that would help me return to a normal weight, and stick to it;
In addition to nutrition, exercise regularly.

It took me about a couple of years to find a suitable diet and sports activities to my liking. But now I am happy with my body, healthy and energetic during the day.

Maintain eye contact

Communication with our eyes is written deep into our genes. Two-day-old newborns prefer to look at faces rather than at toys or the ceiling. The brains of 4-month-old babies are more active if the baby looks into someone's eyes.

When the other person avoids eye contact, people think that he is insincere and less conscientious. And vice versa, we trust more the one who looks into the eyes.

But don't go too far. People consider staring too long a sign of aggressiveness and even psychopathy. Scientists have determined that you need to look into your eyes for no more than three seconds.

Trust is also influenced by the degree of pupil dilation - the wider they are, the more closeness you feel with your interlocutor. You are unable to consciously control your eye muscles. But you can make an appointment in a darkened room, and then the pupils will dilate automatically.

Try to initiate the conversation

Residents of a big city have long been accustomed to pretend that, walking down the street, moving on a bus or on the subway, they do not notice a familiar person or do not recognize him. Downcast eyes, as a rule, indicate a person’s reluctance to communicate with anyone, and this works - they also lose the desire to talk to you.

This adult version of hide and seek causes people to experience more stress and negative emotions than a conversation with even the most undesirable interlocutor.

When you see someone you know, but hide intensely, pretending not to notice him, you are in a state of anticipation. A swarm of questions flash through my head: did he recognize me? Does he want to talk? Or maybe he is in a bad mood and is not in the mood for a conversation? Should I come or not?

In order not to be stressed and not torment yourself once again, it is better to simply come up and start a dialogue, to act as its initiator. You will be surprised how easy it is. If the interlocutor is really not in the mood for a conversation, then you can simply say goodbye and move away.

Article information

This article was produced by our experienced team of editors and researchers, who reviewed it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.

Category: Communication

In other languages:

English: Develop Good Communication Skills, Français: développer de bonnes aptitudes de communication, Italiano: Sviluppare Buone Capacità di Comunicazione, Español: desarrollar buenas habilidades de comunicación, Deutsch: Gute Kommunikationsfähigkeiten entwickeln, Português: Desenvolver Boas Habilidades de Comunica ção, Nederlands: Goede communicatievaardigheden ontwikkelen, 中文: 培养良好的沟通技巧, Bahasa Indonesia: Mengembangkan Kemampuan Komunikasi yang Baik, Čeština: Jak získat dobré komunikační dovednosti, Tiếng Việt: Phát triển K ỹ năng Giao tiếp Tốt, 한국어: 커뮤니케이션 잘하는 방법, हिन्दी: कम्युनिकेशन Communication Skills) by: by: by: by: by Name: コミュニケーション能力を高める, T ürkçe: İletişim Becerileri Nasıl Geliştirilir

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Three Tools for Developing Communication Skills

Reflection

This is the ability to look at how you communicate, as if from the outside, and analyze it. Develop the habit of asking yourself questions (before, during and after communication): “Is it appropriate to start this conversation now? Is now a good time/place to talk? What mood/state is my interlocutor in? Is he emotionally/morally ready for this conversation? Who is my interlocutor? What does he want from this conversation with me?” (and so on.). Here are reflective questions for the skill of orientation in a communication situation, but they can be formulated in a similar way to improve other communication skills.

Feedback

Popular wisdom rightly says: “You can see a straw in someone else’s eye, but you cannot see a log in your own.” There may indeed be “blind spots” in our reflection; we may not notice some weaknesses in our communication. Therefore, a good solution may be help from external observers, who can be asked: “Which of my remarks/actions/behavior in this communication situation were unsuccessful? What did I do wrong? If you trust the observer, then you can ask him for advice on how to improve your communication skills in such situations.

Experiments

Try to at least slightly change your usual (pattern) behavior in communication and see what happens. Don't try to change everything at once, try at least one simple change. For example, in the above example with the “running by” manager, we agreed that he would make at least three stops, during which he would communicate with employees.

Teenagers (who, as we remember, find it difficult to navigate communication situations due to their little experience) were greatly helped by learning one simple technique: “question plus announcement.” Its essence is that before starting any conversation, you just need to ask your interlocutor: “Is it convenient for you to discuss here and now?” – then briefly outline (announce) the topic and purpose of the conversation.

If you are sure that your skills are not sufficiently developed, attending a training session, which is usually called that way (“basic communication skills”, “development of communication skills”, etc.), will help. But even if it is not possible to attend such a training, approach any conversation consciously, use the three tools described above (reflection, feedback, experiments), and you will certainly be able to communicate better.

Show genuine interest in the person you are talking to

When you show sincere interest in your interlocutor, you completely involuntarily begin to listen to him more carefully, trying to understand what he is thinking and feeling. That is, this will help you determine what really interests him.

When you listen to your interlocutor and show interest in his person, you can easily discover that he is not as different from you or as boring as he seemed to you when you met.

Additionally, people will feel more comfortable if they see your interest and attention in them, which will benefit the conversation.

How to develop organizational skills

Since anyone can become an organizer, the question of how to do this is relevant. I suggest a few simple rules:

Organization begins with oneself (self-organization). Learn to organize your own activities, everyday life and your whole life. Make it a rule to make a daily plan, keep a diary, allocate time, set goals, tasks and always fulfill them. Do something right now that you haven’t gotten around to.
Develop empathy, the ability to understand another person, respect for the interests of other people, healthy altruism.
Master and practice positive thinking.
Improve yourself regularly. Adjust your self-esteem, get rid of uncertainty, fear of communication and other problems that you have. All internal barriers must be destroyed.
Develop your creativity.
Expand your horizons.
Train practical thinking, that is, look at the world realistically. Set realistic goals, don't get carried away by dreams.
Be ambitious.

It is important to know well not only your own characteristics, but also to understand the psychology of other people. Correctly distributing responsibilities, taking into account the needs, interests, temperament, character and other characteristics of the participants is the main task of the organizer

Work on your acting skills

Communication abilities are, in turn, a wealth of different intonations and gestures. This is what characterizes people as representatives of society. A sociable person is an excellent storyteller and imitator, who has a taste for juicy detail, for details. He prefers variety in life, since it is easy for such a person to move from one social role to another, in addition, he easily adapts to any situation. Such people have charm and know how to please.

Causes of communication difficulties in a child:

child's isolation

Restriction of freedom, control and hypertrophied assistance deprives the child of individuality and determination to find communication on his own. Frequent changes of environment and moving force the child to re-establish contacts each time. A somewhat stressful situation is created, which can also reduce the level of communication skills. Children model the behavior of adults, and it is likely that among their circle of friends there will be those who will negatively influence the child’s behavior

In such a situation, it is important to be correct and gently convey to the child what is good and what is bad. A large number of prohibitions is also not good for communication skills and the relationship between parent and child in general; if possible, it is necessary to reduce the level of prohibitions and expand the child’s boundaries of freedom. Being isolated on one's own shortcomings makes the child closed to communication; it is worth helping him to relate to himself more easily.

What is the difference between sociability and communication skills?

Often confusion in meaning turns the terms themselves into a mystery. Communication skills are one of the components of sociability and contact as such. This is not an innate, but an acquired skill that can not only be developed, but also improved throughout life.

Communication is the ability to convey information, feelings, emotions, conclusions in an accessible, correct form. It is also the ability to perceive information, experience empathy for the interlocutor, the ability to understand and empathize.

The concept itself is not always a human skill. Communicativeness as a quality can characterize any tool that transmits and receives information.

Communication is a set of qualities such as:

Non-verbal communication;
Managing emotions, anger;
Active listening;
Understanding your opponent's emotions;
Ability to express and defend your point of view.

Communication as a personality quality cannot be perceived only as a set of skills; this skill is directly related to the segment of needs and motivation.

Situational blindness

The author of these lines relatively recently conducted a seminar for school psychologists, where he asked specialists to assess which communication skills are worst developed in modern teenagers. The range of assessments turned out to be quite large, but psychologists agreed that the skill of orientation in a communication situation was the worst developed. The deficiency of this skill manifests itself in the inability to choose the appropriate time and place of communication. The conversation turns out to be inappropriate, ineffective (the goals of the participants are not achieved) and unpleasant (provokes negative emotions).

The inability of adolescents to navigate a communication situation is primarily due to their limited social experience. They really do not have enough knowledge to understand the motives and goals of other participants in communication, predict the duration of the conversation, and assess the relevance of the topic being discussed at a given time and place. But such “situational blindness” is not limited to teenagers.

I had the opportunity to advise a manager who was faced with stubborn resistance from the team (“I give them instructions, set tasks, but they constantly disrupt their implementation!”). He had a habit of running quickly around the office, shouting orders as he went. It seemed to him that this was enough and that employees should literally “catch on the fly” his instructions.

In fact, he simply perceived the situation incorrectly

Many employees simply did not have time to switch their attention from their work to the fast pace of the boss, and literally did not hear what he was telling them. Secondly, many employees simply did not understand to whom exactly the phrase thrown into the air was addressed

Thirdly, people already had previously assigned work tasks, and the priority of the new “introduction” was unclear to them (and there was no opportunity to ask a clarifying question in the back of the fleeing boss).

Setting a task is not just a phrase thrown out on the run; it is a rather complex management and communication skill. And the first rule for this skill: create or select a situation suitable for setting the task.

An “appropriate” situation is one where nothing distracts the participants’ attention from discussing the task and they can fully focus their attention on the dialogue. The situation should create an opportunity for high-quality contact between participants in communication

In addition, in order for a task to be accepted for execution (and not just set), the situation must provide an opportunity to receive feedback from the performer. How can you focus attention, discuss something, give feedback (etc.), if the manager flies by like a bullet?

Be understanding about criticism

The ancient Greek philosopher Epictetus advised listening to criticism. If a person senses a grain of truth in it, then it is worth thinking about how to improve.

However, it should be remembered that in the vast majority of cases criticism is a reflection of the emotional state and mood of the critic. Perhaps he was having a bad day. Maybe your pet or child is sick. Perhaps your interlocutor is angry with someone or is jealous of you. Because people are often focused on themselves and their experiences, it is very easy to draw the wrong conclusion.

Remember that the world does not revolve around you. Realize that people think very little about you, about your actions and mood. This knowledge can make your life much easier. Thus, the problem that is associated with the fear of taking the wrong step and saying something wrong (and this supposedly will somehow affect the opinions of others about you) turns into a small obstacle.

Development of communication skills, socialization and cognition of preschoolers

From an early age, socialization and communication skills are developed through play activities. This is due to the fact that play is the main method of children's cognition.

The simplest game for developing communication skills is a conversation on behalf of a doll or toy, or maybe a pet. This technique allows you to get used to conversations, which in the future will contribute to freer communication with people. You can include a pet in the dialogue. You can start the game by asking a question, for example, what age are the kittens, puppy or parrot.

Collective games also contribute to the development of communication skills. In the process of such collective activity, the little ones have the opportunity to communicate lively with each other in play activities.

The development of communication skills can occur in conjunction with training other abilities, such as memory. The game “Getting Acquainted” was developed for this purpose. To organize such a gaming activity, all participants must be seated in a circle. Then each person takes turns introducing themselves and briefly talking about their interests. Each subsequent player must first repeat the speech of the previous baby, and then pronounce his own. Such games develop communication skills by organizing a space in which everyone can talk about themselves in a calm atmosphere, as well as listen to other children.

Children's communication skills: how to determine?

At a certain age, the baby must have certain communication skills. Therefore, to determine the degree of sociability, parents need to compare their child and the generalized characteristics presented below. At the age of 2 to 3 years, sociability signs appear in the following:

the ability to attract people's attention;
initiating social interaction with peers verbally and physically;
the ability to listen to another person's speech;
conducting a conversation when it is your turn;
reacting with laughter to absurd objects or phenomena.
3-4 year olds should:
strictly observe the order during the game;
perceive toys or dolls as living beings;
Be the initiator of verbal interaction.
At the age of 4-5 years, babies most often:
know how to communicate with other children;
apply direct demands in communication, for example, “Stop it”;
present themselves as parents during play activities;
They start gossiping and sneaking around.

Signs of communication skills in children over 5 years old

At the age of 5-6 years, sociable personalities are manifested through:

ability to develop a strategic approach to conversations;
participation in competitive games based on competition;
introducing the concept of “fair play” into gaming activities;
awareness of one’s own behavior, the use of words “sorry”, “thank you”, “please”;
bringing joy to your own friends.

Guys aged 6 to 7 years:

learn to sympathize and empathize with the people around them;
more often share their experiences with others, while they use not only words, but also gestures and postures;
clearly expect their turn;
listen to other people's opinions and then analyze their solidarity with them;
know how to end a conversation;
They joke more, learn to lose and be happy for the winner.

It is worth considering that up to the age of 7 years, children have difficulty distinguishing the difference between good and bad, as a result of which they are often unable to independently determine the right direction or make the right decision. Therefore, parents are obliged not only to develop communication skills in their child, but also to explain to him how to act well and how to act badly. Only with such an integrated approach will a child be able to grow into a socialized, communicative personality.

This video contains discussions about how to develop a child from birth and is it necessary? Be sure to leave your questions, suggestions and comments on the article.

Communication skills in children

The period of childhood is of greatest importance for a person in terms of the development of mental abilities and communication skills. In the first years of life, a child acquires his first distinctive features, his character begins to form, and his own tastes appear. In kindergarten and junior grades, communication skills develop especially actively, after which they become fully formed.

In order for a child to fully communicate, parents must adhere to a number of recommendations aimed at developing communication skills. They are quite simple, but are overlooked by many adults. What exactly needs to be done:

Set the right example, communicate in front of the child;
Ask your child questions more often, which is especially important for elementary school students;
Discuss all your actions with your child, explain their essence;
Encourage the preschooler to communicate with peers;
Teach your child to express thoughts verbally and in writing;
Ask the baby to show desires verbally and not non-verbally;
Teach the child politeness, understanding, empathy;
React calmly to conflicts;
Do not scold a student in public, because the teenager may feel humiliated;
Explain to the child that all people have their own interests that should be taken into account;
Try to maintain your child’s high self-esteem and avoid harsh criticism.

Additionally, it is recommended to play different games with your child. For example, “The sea is agitated once.” You can also ask him to portray his favorite character from fairy tales or to get used to the role of the savior of the Princess Nesmeyana, trying to make her laugh.

Sometimes children who do not have sufficient communication skills end up being retarded or suffering from certain diseases.

Games

A good way to achieve high communication skills is through game-based training. They help each participant to open up to other people, feel free and completely relax. In such conditions, it is easiest to develop communication skills. Some games can even be used at home for joint training between parents and children.

How to play:

Repetitions. The game involves at least 5 people. One of them becomes the leader and shows the others certain movements (claps of palms, hand movements, etc.), voicing each of them. Everyone must repeat. To make it more difficult, the presenter can name something other than the action he is performing, and the participants must correctly orient themselves and repeat exactly what was said.
Guessing emotions. To play you need to split into 2 teams. All participants in the first group take turns showing different emotions that need to be drawn from a deck of special cards, and the second group must guess them. Then the teams change roles.
Theatrical scenes. You can play together, and the goal will be to role-play a situation. You can come up with absolutely any events, but they must suit both participants. It is advisable to act out scenes of various conflicts until they are completely resolved.
Origami. The game requires the presence of several participants. They all close their eyes, holding an A4 sheet of paper in their hands. The presenter gives instructions on exactly how to fold the sheet, and he should ask several times to tear it. At the end, you need to compare the results of everyone present.

Such simple games will perfectly help you achieve your goal. However, you should not expect that their use alone will be sufficient. They are best used as an additional measure or the first stage of skill development.

Exercises

You can also develop your communication skills with the help of special exercises. Most of them require the presence of one or more interlocutors, which is very important when improving communication skills. It is recommended to perform them every day. It may seem difficult at first, because... It is extremely difficult to develop communication skills. This is especially true for adults who have long accepted their unsociability.

What exercises should you use:

Visualization. The essence of the exercise will be to mentally imagine communicating with another person. The interlocutor should be a real acquaintance, and not a fictional character, which is important to consider. During the presented dialogue, you need to carefully monitor your movements, highlight the features of timbre and speed of speech at different moments, and also identify for yourself the strengths and weaknesses of this conversation.
Communication with the mirror. A very simple technique for developing communication skills with charm, which is used by many successful people. After several weeks of training, you will be able to convey your emotions and thoughts more correctly, as well as speak beautifully. To perform the exercise, you just need to stand in front of the mirror and alternately show different emotions, as well as talk to yourself.
Fulfillment of desires. This exercise can only be performed in pairs with another person, and it is advisable to do it in both directions. One person writes his desire on a piece of paper and, without talking about it, tries to explain to the second participant what exactly he wants. It is recommended to choose a desire so that some active action is required from the partner to fulfill it.
Conversation in songs. For training you will need to divide into 2 equal teams of 1 to 5 people. The essence of the exercise is that the first group asks a question, which is a line from a song, and the second answers it, also part of any musical composition. This must be done one at a time, and no more than 30 seconds are given to think about the answer.
Exit from the circle. One person stands in the center of a circle consisting of other participants. He must remain there, and the goal of other people will be to lure him out by any means of persuasion. It is recommended to film everything on video in order to then analyze the behavior of the main participant.
Let's talk cleanly. You can perform the exercise within a whole group of participants. It is desirable that they all have undeveloped communication skills. The essence of the method is to write your portrait on a piece of paper. You need to indicate your pros and cons regarding sociability, and then do the same analysis of other participants. When all the portraits are ready, you will need to compare your personal view of yourself with the opinion of all other participants.
Completing sentences. Classes of this type can be held regularly and only require the presence of a few people. Four people should stand next to each other, and their goal will be to create a story. The first participant begins each sentence, cutting off after a couple of words, and the other three alternately add several phrases to it, completing it. The result should be an interesting story, which is recommended to be discussed together.

There are other exercises that can help improve your communication skills. They are very often used in groups, which are created so that strangers can meet and practice in a pleasant atmosphere, improving their abilities. Sometimes a couple of such activities are enough to open yourself up and get rid of stiffness.

The famous orator Demosthenes spoke with his mouth full of stones. He considered this the best way to develop communication skills, speech quality and self-confidence.

Basics of Effective Communication

Communication as a banal exchange of information is already present in the simplest animals. Man, in the process of evolution, has brought communication to perfection. Spoken and signed speech developed and gradually expanded to written, symbolic and figurative. However, this process has made understanding more difficult, and effective communication is becoming a separate object of study.

The communication process includes five elements:

A communicator is someone who conveys information.
Contents of the message.
The method of transmitting information (how it is carried out).
The audience, or recipient, is who the message is intended for.
The final stage of communication, which allows us to understand whether effective communication has taken place. It is only possible if the previous four are sufficiently satisfactory.

Communication skills are... Definition and characteristics

If in childhood a person did not receive proper understanding and support from his family, which did not allow him to gain experience in communication, he may become unconfident and withdrawn. That is, his communication skills will be at a low level. How to get out of this situation? Develop communication skills. However, before you figure out how to act in such a situation, you need to understand the structure of communication.

Personal communication abilities, the characteristics of which are presented below, include the following types.

Regulatory-communicative: the ability to help a person in a difficult situation, as well as accept someone else’s help when you yourself find yourself in a difficult situation. In addition, this type is responsible for the ability to resolve emerging conflicts using adequate methods.
Affective-communicative: the ability to notice the emotional states of others, as well as to respond to them in a timely and correct manner. In addition, this type is responsible for showing responsiveness and respect for the interlocutor.
Information and communication skills: the ability to start, maintain and end a conversation. In addition, this ability helps to attract the attention of the interlocutor using both verbal and non-verbal means of communication.

Effective Communication Techniques

Any person lives in society and is dependent on it. Even the most desperate homebodies, perhaps not directly, but enter into interpersonal relationships. Effective communication will be useful both for work and for everyday social connections. Communication techniques and skills can be developed and improved - this will make anyone's life much easier.

Do you want to receive positivity in the process of communication? It will be useful for you to learn some techniques for increasing the effectiveness of communication:

Learn to listen carefully to what they say. You should not just look at the interlocutor during a conversation, but also bend slightly, nod your head, and ask appropriate leading questions. This technique will allow you to understand the interlocutor’s point of view as accurately as possible.
Be clear, concise and to the point. The more clearly a thought is formulated, the more likely it is that it will be understood and perceived correctly.
Include in your arsenal not only verbal, but also non-verbal communication. Take the same position as the interlocutor, try to use only open gestures, and do not touch your face during the conversation.
Watch for the emotional coloring of speech. It should be moderate, but so much so that the interlocutor understands your interest in the issue.
Master the techniques of oratory. The ability to master your voice allows you to accelerate the development of effective communication. Clear articulation, correct timbre and adjusted volume will make any message positive.
Master technical means of communication. Any adult must be able to use the telephone, fax, Skype, and email. Written communication skills should be developed regularly.

These are just basic techniques designed to facilitate and improve interpersonal communication.

Rules for successful communication

The famous speaker Dale Carnegie published the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” more than 80 years ago. In it, he described the most effective basic communication techniques and rules that will help introverted and shy people become excellent conversationalists. These rules remain relevant to this day.

Genuinely showing interest in other people. Often we find it more pleasant to talk with those who are interested in our personality and ask various questions regarding our opinion and experience. Therefore, be sure to ask questions to your interlocutor. But don't turn the conversation into an interrogation with bias. Everything should be natural and sincere, and for this you must experience genuine interest in your interlocutor.
Smile. A person who smiles evokes positive feelings in us. Even if we don’t know him personally. During a conversation, your smile is proof that the interlocutor is pleasant to you and you like talking to him. Just try to avoid a fake smile. Smile not only with your mouth, but also with your eyes, soul, and heart.
Proper name. From birth, the sound of our name is the most pleasant sound. Therefore, always address others by their first and middle names if necessary. The name indicates the individuality of a person, his originality and uniqueness. This is the simplest compliment you can give someone. Just call him by name.
Listening skills. In conversation, people usually prefer to talk more than listen. Often they simply wait for their turn to speak and do not try to listen and understand what they are told. Especially during an argument. If you listen carefully to your interlocutor, ask him clarifying questions and successfully use phrases that he said earlier during the conversation, then you will pleasantly surprise him. Listening and hearing your interlocutor is much more important than speaking.
Interesting topics for conversation. Talk about topics that are interesting to your interlocutor, and finding out about them is quite easy and simple, using rule No. 1 - showing sincere interest. When a person talks about something exciting, his eyes light up. Even if this topic does not seem particularly interesting to you, still try to listen. Surely you can learn something valuable and interesting for yourself.
Compliments. Each of us has unique characteristics that are worthy of admiration. Try to notice them in your interlocutor and sincerely express your admiration, approval, and praise. Your compliments should not be exaggerated and resemble undisguised flattery. Falseness always feels good. A timely, sincere compliment will be very pleasant to your interlocutor and will make the conversation even easier and more relaxed.