Most married couples prefer to pretend that cheating is beyond their reality, at least in their family it is impossible.
But the sad truth is that infidelity is much more common than is commonly believed, and the sample statistics of female adultery are not much behind the number of male cases of adultery.
According to a 2015 study, 74 percent of men and 68 percent of women surveyed admitted that cheating would happen in their marital relationship if they were confident that their partner would never find out about it and they could emerge clean from the murky waters of infidelity .
Such a small statistical gap is an interesting fact that characterizes the level of morality in the modern world.
Psychology of female infidelity
They say that a woman cheats with her heart, and a man cheats with his body. And this is the main difference between male and female infidelity. Men value physiological contact more, while women value emotional connection. She cheats because she is in love with someone else. She feels tenderness, affection, sympathy for her lover.
By the way, this leads to another important difference between male and female infidelity. It lies in choosing a partner. If it is enough for a man that his mistress is simply outwardly pretty and well-groomed, then a woman approaches the choice of a potential lover more carefully. This must be a worthy male representative, endowed with those qualities that she most likely lacks in her partner.
The consequences of female infidelity are usually more serious. Men cheat on their spouses, but do not leave their families. After all, everything is already set up there. And wives are most often ready to forgive their husbands who have gone on sprees. And if a woman who is legally married cheated, then the husband, as a rule, is not able to accept this, much less forgive. In addition, a woman who has decided to take such a step has most likely long ago made the decision to break off relations with her husband.
Too little emotion
We must not forget that women are built completely differently. They constantly need new emotions to recharge themselves.
If there are no new impressions and experiences, she will become bored. Give the girl emotions: with trips, gifts, events. Even a small present for no reason can be more valuable to her than an expensive gift.
Just go ahead and buy her a bouquet of flowers today. No subtext, no obligation, no reason. And you will see how her eyes will burn. True, if before this you messed up big time, there is a chance of getting hit in the face with these same flowers. So act according to the situation.
Reasons for female infidelity
Women are monogamous by nature. Therefore, cheating is a sign of a serious crisis in a relationship. It’s worth figuring out what reasons might push her to take this step.
Emotional vacuum
A woman needs emotional intimacy and attention from her partner. If a man is not interested in his lady’s feelings and considers them unworthy of attention, she begins to feel lonely and unnecessary. Realizing the lack of attention to herself, the girl becomes vulnerable.
And if at this moment another guy begins to look after her, show care and sensitivity, then betrayal may occur unintentionally. Which does not relieve the traitor of the blame for what happened.
Loneliness
If a man spends almost 24 hours a day at work or often goes on long business trips, the woman experiences a feeling of loneliness. She may even feel abandoned.
This feeling intensifies if, in rare moments of being together, the chosen one does not pay enough attention to his partner. Therefore, the lady takes a lover to overcome loneliness. But the woman does not plan to break off relations with the man with whom she lives.
This also includes those cases when the partner is physically nearby, but in terms of his range of interests he is very far from the partner. He is more drawn to virtual reality, to watching TV, to drinking beer with friends, but not to his chosen one. And if she does not dare to leave such a man and continues to live with him, then, most likely, she will soon have a lover with whom she will again feel interesting and desirable.
Boredom
In many couples, stormy emotions and trembling excitement are replaced by calm and boredom. This is especially true for marriages. The man had already won his girlfriend and calmed down. He no longer needs to actively court her, invite her on dates, constantly surprise her and give gifts.
Now she belongs to him. At least that's what he thinks. Therefore, he prefers chatting with friends, watching TV or playing computer games to spending time with his significant other.
A girl can have a hard time experiencing such changes in relationships. She will make every effort to change the situation and again “revive” monotonous and boring relationships. But if her chosen one does not meet her halfway, she may decide to cheat. Secrecy, excitement and passion will create a surge of pleasant emotions. At the same time, the girl will still love her permanent partner.
Sexual dissatisfaction
Sex, like emotional intimacy, is one of the main components of a relationship. At the moment of orgasm, the female body produces a fivefold dose of the happiness hormone - oxytocin. This hormone increases attraction to a partner, strengthens the feeling of intimacy, unity and harmony with the chosen one. Therefore, lack of sex may well become the cause of female infidelity.
Because a husband often denies his wife intimacy, a woman may get the impression that he is no longer attracted to her. Therefore, in order to feel desired again, she takes on a lover.
The other side of this issue is not the quantity, but the quality of sex. It happens that a couple has a lot of sex, but the game consistently “goes one way.” If at the same time a man makes no attempt to change the situation and qualitatively satisfy his partner, then most likely the matter will end in female infidelity. A woman will satisfy her need for sex on the side.
Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the most common reasons why married women cheat on their husbands.
Revenge
The reason for female infidelity may lie in a very strong desire to take revenge on her man for the complete betrayal. At the same time, the woman will not intentionally hide the fact of betrayal in order to cause him pain and suffering. Physical intimacy with her lover itself is unlikely to bring her anything other than sexual satisfaction. And even that is not a fact!
By cheating, a girl can take revenge not only for betrayal, but also for the rude attitude, humiliation, assault or drunkenness of her man. This is a kind of act of protest. At the same time, she will not rush to leave her chosen one, hoping that he will come to his senses and the relationship will improve again.
Money
A girl who is too fixated on material goods can cheat on a man if he is not able to provide for her and cover all expenses. To do this, she takes on a rich lover, but continues to live with her beloved guy.
However, women are more likely to cheat on their men, even when they have money and the couple does not feel the need. Financial success increases the level of the male hormone testosterone in the female body.
A successful lady depends less and less on her partner. Her level of the female hormone estrogen decreases. Such women are much more likely to want to have a one-night stand just to have fun.
In married women who are more financially dependent on their husbands, estrogen levels are much higher than testosterone levels. Therefore, they are more attached to their partner.
However, one should not assume that all representatives of the fairer sex who have achieved financial success cheat on their men. This can only strengthen the existing desire to commit treason.
Career
Cheating can even occur for the sake of career growth and obtaining the desired high position. Unfortunately, nowadays such cases are not uncommon. Most often, the initiator of an illegal relationship is a male leader, but there are cases when a woman herself expresses readiness to take such a step.
A break up
Breaking off a relationship, especially a long-term one, is not easy. The girl is afraid to admit to the guy that her old feelings have disappeared. Therefore, she decides to cheat in order to burn all bridges and end the relationship forever. In general, this happens quite rarely.
More often, a woman takes a lover in order to start a new relationship and not be left alone after breaking up an old one.
Age-related changes
With age, a woman begins to notice the loss of some qualities that previously made her attractive to members of the opposite sex.
Ladies begin to feel this especially acutely after 40 years. If your beloved man has already forgotten how to give compliments and has long stopped admiring his companion, she will again want to feel desired and sexually in demand. And he will begin to look for confirmation of this on the side.
Emotional immaturity
It happens that very young girls strive to start a serious relationship and even get married as soon as possible. Such a rush leads to the fact that partners do not have time to get to know each other properly. Subsequently, disappointment sets in in family life.
The girl has no emotional, physical, or material satisfaction. Therefore, she takes an example from her unmarried friends and begins, as they say, to walk.
A special type of woman
Despite the fact that women are monogamous by nature, even among them there are sometimes easily accessible young ladies. They like to change men frequently. The girl experiences great pleasure from this. At the same time, she is comfortable living with a guy who is resigned to her adventures, endures everything and constantly forgives her. These also happen.
There is such a psychological diagnosis as nymphomania. This is a phenomenon in which a girl constantly experiences sexual desire and wants sex. She changes sexual partners very often. This psychological illness does not allow her to remain faithful.
She is not satisfied in sex
And again, mistakes that many make. Allegedly, I’m a man, and I want sex, but why do women need it? Yes Yes. Continue to think like that, and you will remain in splendid isolation.
Sex is just as necessary and important for women. Maybe even more than for men, it depends on temperament. Good sex is the key to a strong and long-lasting relationship. And if this sex is not at home, then it can be found somewhere else.
Your intimate relationship should not turn into a boring chug once a week or month. You must also take care of her pleasure. Do you know, for example, whether she had an orgasm or faked it? Sex in a long-term relationship should not become a routine. There are many ways to diversify your intimacy, so you can safely try something new.
If any problems begin to appear in your sex life, talk to her. They can be corrected or at least some kind of compromise can be reached.
Signs of female infidelity
Women can find it difficult to hide their feelings. Therefore, she either herself admits to cheating, or she will begin to give herself away by the fact that her behavior is changing. Let's figure out how to understand a woman's behavior if she cheated.
Here are the main signs of betrayal:
- Stealth. The most obvious sign of betrayal is the woman’s secrecy. If earlier she calmly left her phone unattended, now she always carries it with her and retires to another room for conversations. She also changes passwords for her social media accounts, her computer or laptop, and, of course, her phone.
- Coldness in sex. The cheater begins to avoid intimacy with the man with whom she lives in every possible way. This applies not only to sex, but also to simple hugs and kisses. And if there is no sex in a relationship, then the relationship itself will soon not exist.
- Nitpicking. A woman begins to be irritated by the actions of a man, which she previously tolerated. For example, scattered clothes, unwashed dishes. This becomes a reason for quarrels.
- Indifference. But if a woman stops nagging a man for his scattered socks, wondering where he is and when he will return home, then this is a clear sign of indifference. She is no longer interested in him. Why not think about it?
- Can't get through. It was impossible to reach the girl because she often allegedly forgot her phone in the car. Or she turns it off so that the phone does not distract her during meetings and other important meetings. Although before she always answered calls and literally immediately called back as soon as she noticed a missed call. This is a clear sign that the girl is hiding something.
- Incitement to betrayal. Some women, who are tormented by their conscience because of betrayal, can offer their man to “go to the left.” Especially after yet another refusal of sex. She may even convince her partner that sex is not cheating at all, thus trying to save her reputation. After all, having succumbed to such persuasion, it will be he who will become the culprit of the breakup of the relationship.
- New friends. Suddenly, the girl has new friends and girlfriends with whom she often spends time. At the same time, the girl is in no hurry to introduce her man to these “new friends”, after meeting with whom she returns very satisfied.
- Agreement in everything. The girl began to agree with her man on everything and stopped quarreling with him. Although in the past she often argued due to disagreements that arose. She doesn’t want to have unnecessary contact with her man so much that it’s easier to agree with all his ideas.
- Transfiguration. When a woman takes on a lover, she begins to take better care of herself. He goes to the gym, to the cosmetologist, to the solarium, to the beauty salon. More often than usual, he buys himself new beautiful and even sexy outfits. Such a transformation in itself is not proof of infidelity. This is rather a reason to think about what these changes are connected with.
- Coldness in sex. The cheater begins to avoid intimacy with the man with whom she lives in every possible way. This applies not only to sex, but also to simple hugs and kisses. And if there is no sex in a relationship, then the relationship itself will soon not exist.
- Nitpicking. A woman begins to be irritated by the actions of a man, which she previously tolerated. For example, scattered clothes, unwashed dishes. This becomes a reason for quarrels.
- Indifference. But if a woman stops nagging a man for his scattered socks, wondering where he is and when he will return home, then this is a clear sign of indifference. She is no longer interested in him. Why not think about it?
- Can't get through. It was impossible to reach the girl because she often allegedly forgot her phone in the car. Or she turns it off so that the phone does not distract her during meetings and other important meetings. Although before she always answered calls and literally immediately called back as soon as she noticed a missed call. This is a clear sign that the girl is hiding something.
- Incitement to betrayal. Some women, who are tormented by their conscience because of betrayal, can offer their man to “go to the left.” Especially after yet another refusal of sex. She may even convince her partner that sex is not cheating at all, thus trying to save her reputation. After all, having succumbed to such persuasion, it will be he who will become the culprit of the breakup of the relationship.
- New friends. Suddenly, the girl has new friends and girlfriends with whom she often spends time. At the same time, the girl is in no hurry to introduce her man to these “new friends”, after meeting with whom she returns very satisfied.
- Agreement in everything. The girl began to agree with her man on everything and stopped quarreling with him. Although in the past she often argued due to disagreements that arose. She doesn’t want to have unnecessary contact with her man so much that it’s easier to agree with all his ideas.
If a girl shows at least some of these signs in her behavior, then she has something to hide. I also advise you to watch a video on how to understand that a woman is cheating.
She feels indifferent
Not to you, but from you. Understand that women are built completely differently. What seems normal to you may not suit her at all.
Imagine: you wooed her, showered her with gifts, flowers, compliments. And now the goal has been achieved - it is yours. And then it all began to fade away. You no longer have the same interest and desire to achieve it. It has become part of your everyday life. Or better yet, a housekeeper who does all the work and sometimes sleeps with you.
Yes, you can be so comfortable. And what she needs there is of little concern to you, or you simply don’t think about it. And this is where many people make a huge mistake. And then they wonder: why do girls cheat, have I not given her enough?
Few. If you think that you can relax the buns once it becomes yours, then this is not so. Strong, long-term relationships are built not only on trust and comfort. You need to surprise and conquer her every time. When a woman feels her importance and your love, she is unlikely to want to have an affair on the side.
Ways to find out if a woman is cheating
It is difficult for a woman to hide her own feelings. Most often, the lady admits everything or gives herself away. The cheating spouse sits for a long time in front of the mirror, starts going to aerobics and fitness again, and constantly tries to look good. Not only in your own eyes, but also in the eyes of your lover.
Also, the unfaithful woman begins to find fault with things that she previously tolerated (dishes unwashed by her husband, scattered clothes). Or vice versa: he completely stops paying attention to his spouse’s shortcomings, as if the spouse is not at all interested. An unfaithful wife becomes emotionally and sexually cold. Avoids any physical contact (even simple hugs).
When a spouse is sure that his wife is cheating or his wife has admitted everything, it is very important to decide what to do next. They should talk honestly about the future together. Of course, a couple who finds themselves in such a difficult situation needs the help of psychologists. Experts will help you decide whether it is worth saving the relationship, or whether love has already completely faded away, and therefore it is better to get a divorce calmly without unnecessary dramas or scandals.
She bears all the responsibility
It may happen that you simply relaxed and quietly shifted the responsibility for your relationship onto her shoulders.
Housework is her job, her problems are her problems, all this has little to do with you. She works like a horse and earns more than you. The woman becomes a locomotive that drags your couple along with her. Do all women cheat in this case? No, but the risk is great.
No matter how strong she is, she also sometimes wants to be a weak and fragile girl. Feel cared for, protected and supported. Understand that she is BEHIND the man, like behind a wall.
Yes, all her outbursts and requests can be justified by the fact that she is going through a difficult period, difficulties at work and all that. But one day she will get tired. And she will want a man next to whom she can feel like a little girl.
