A girl fell in love with her best friend: what to do

There are many opinions about friendship between a man and a woman. But, for the most part, it ends in love relationships. You went to the same kindergarten group, then studied in the same class, he always carried your briefcase. You were always sure that he was there, you had someone to rely on, and someone to tell about your troubles. And now, you are already adults who continue to be friends, but you began to understand that your feelings are something more than just friendship. You fell in love with your best friend! What to do in this situation, and is it necessary to do anything at all?

How to find out about his feelings

Perhaps a friend has been showing signs of attention for a long time
. If this happens, the girl realizes that she has fallen in love with her best friend, the first thing that begins to worry is whether the young man will want to change the role of a comrade to a beloved guy. You need to think about it: perhaps your feelings did not arise out of nowhere; they are a consequence of the fact that a friend has been experiencing loving affection for a long time and showing signs of attention. It is possible that the guy himself is afraid to talk about what is in his heart, he does not want to risk friendly relations, because this way he may be left alone. In such a situation, it would be a good idea to talk with mutual friends, just do it not directly, but try to carefully find out. It is possible that they themselves will begin to tell you that a friend is somehow especially looking in your direction or showing concern. They have long guessed about his feelings.

Friends communicate closely and spend a lot of time together. In order to understand what is in a friend’s heart, you just need to observe his manners, behavior, and gaze.

1. A young man never turns his back to you.
2. Almost constantly looks straight into the eyes.
3. He doesn’t talk about his ex-girlfriends or his victories over them.
4. People around you will behave differently than they do around friends.
5. The guy often gives “friendly” gifts.
6. The young man tries to spend as much time as possible next to you.
7. The guy is interested in your life and helps in case of trouble.
8. Shows obvious concern and is worried about you.

Add emotions!

Emotions experienced together not only bring people together, but create strong emotional bonds between them. Moreover, both positive and negative. Therefore, try not just to spend time together, but to create reasons for common emotions. These can be various games, including where you are partners against other friends or rivals in a game for two. Parties and holidays, various open city events are well suited. Extreme activities or even just joint hikes through beautiful, but usually inaccessible places in your city will create a lot of common emotions. In winter, ice slides, ice skating, skiing, snowball fights and similar games, both together and in a large group, give a lot of emotions. As you noticed, you don't have to spend a lot of money on this. Just think about what will be interesting to your friend and you - there are plenty of free opportunities around.

To confess or not

If you know that your friend isn't dating anyone right now, it might be time to talk about your feelings. What can push you to this is that the guy often, supposedly as a joke, hugs, kisses on the cheek, and tries in every possible way to protect. You must understand that you will not be able to hide your feelings for a long time, because they will become too obvious. Well, why bother and try to hide something, it’s better to tell everything honestly.

Of course, it is possible that your friend will be stunned; it turns out that he does not feel anything close to that. In some cases, a young man will simply need time to think about everything; perhaps he himself has long ago changed his attitude towards you, but is afraid to admit it to himself.

The girl must be prepared for the fact that after everything becomes known, she may lose her boyfriend forever. After all, in a situation where one friend’s feelings have grown into love, but the other’s have not, there is nothing else left. Here, in essence, either the feelings turn out to be mutual, and the couple starts dating, or the friends break up, the girl suffers, but over time she meets new love.

Sometimes a young man who does not feel love may agree to become a boyfriend and girlfriend because he does not want to lose a friend in you. Over time, he will either fall in love or understand the meaninglessness of your intimacy, then you will have to break up.

What if it's for real?

“I fell in love with a guy’s friend,” girls often say. The topic is quite popular today. If this has happened to you, rest assured that you are not alone. And different people can give a lot of advice - the most contradictory.

By the way, Freud himself convinced people of the reasons that influence our desires. Perhaps you were not happy with everything in your relationship with your boyfriend or spouse. Perhaps you were looking for another man without knowing it? Many ladies specifically test their charms, trying to prove to themselves that they are seductive. The problem may be that the girl will get carried away and fall in love with her own “victim.”

A friend of the man you love can also attract you with his inaccessibility. Therefore, feelings may not actually be as strong as they seem. Falling in love with another may also appear because the girl is offended by her partner for some reason. Thus, she takes revenge and deals a strong blow to her chosen one.

Although the feelings can be real. In this case, you will have to solve the problem as tactfully as possible. So as not to cause pain to your ex-lover.

Possible methods

Invite a friend to the cinema. This can bring you closer

1. In the presence of a friend, do not think about your former boyfriends. We can say that you dream of starting a serious relationship with a man like him.
2. Invite a friend to a party. Here he will be able to see you in a new light, because you will visit the hairdresser and put on a beautiful outfit. Pre-arrange with a friend whom your friend does not know, so that during the party she will come up and note how beautiful your couple is. And here the main thing is to monitor your friend’s reaction. If he immediately starts to deny your relationship, it means he treats you like a friend. If he remains silent, then you will remain silent. At the end of the party, be sure to retire and tell him about it. Note that you would really make a great couple, I wonder what it would be like if you started dating.
3. Change your usual environment, you can invite a friend to play tennis or go to the movies, like in a friendly way. Try to create such meetings as often as possible, to be together more.
4. If your friend does not yet know everything about your hidden talents, perhaps now is the time to demonstrate them to him, to open up in a new way.
5. Touch him often. Let it be minor touches, straighten his bangs, pat him on the shoulder. Perhaps emotions will awaken in him, the guy will feel the pleasure of your closeness.
6. Don't hesitate to ask him for help. Afterwards, be sure to say thank you. It is important for a man to feel his strength and feel that he is needed.
7. The most effective way: you can kiss your friend directly on the lips and see his reaction. If a young man has been suffering from love for a long time, he will reciprocate, pressing his lips even harder. If it comes as a shock to him, you can always say that something has come over you. Let this event be preceded by some positive emotions.
8. Sometimes no hints help to convey to the guy the awareness of what is in your heart. In this case, all that remains is to speak directly about your feelings, knowing about possible reactions.

Time-out

Whatever your choice, remember just one thing - you cannot live someone else’s life, but you can only live your life once. Therefore, do not rush into making a choice; it is better to temporarily refuse any contact with both the guy and his friend. You can go on vacation or visit your grandmother in the village. If this is difficult, just limit your contacts: don’t call them, don’t correspond, don’t meet with them. It is very important to be able to distance yourself from worries and unnecessary emotions. Only this will help you make the right choice and not regret it in the future.

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Adviсe

1. Remember the first time you felt that you were experiencing feelings stronger than friendship. Didn't this arise at the moment when a friend started dating some girl? If yes, you simply have a sense of ownership, because now you need to share it with someone. In this case, most likely, you will not lose the friendship, unless the new girl turns him against you.
2. Flirt with your friend, but don't make any promises. It is important that he sees an attractive girl next to him, and not “his boy” who was running around with him in the yard.
3. Try to provoke him to jealousy. If a friend finds your meetings with another man unpleasant, it means he is not indifferent.
4. If you have doubts about reciprocity, you can suggest a friendly trip to the cinema to watch a film about love. This way, you will unobtrusively hint to your friend about your feelings. At the same time, such an invitation will not cause violent resistance.
5. Start touching him more often, do it without excess, in a friendly way. Over time, let them develop into the category of soulful and affectionate. If you hug when you meet, hold him longer in your arms.
6. You have probably been friends for more than one year and know a lot about your friend, about his views on girls, about what he likes. Now nothing prevents him from becoming that ideal.
7. If you feel that your friend is breathing unevenly, but for some reason is in no hurry to talk about his feelings, you can take the first step, invite him to a cafe, to a romantic meeting.
8. It is not recommended to abruptly communicate your feelings to a friend. It’s better to prepare it, start hinting from afar.
9. In order for a guy to look at you from a different angle, it is recommended to change your image or at least change in some way. For example, if you and a friend always run in sportswear and sneakers, it’s time to put on a skirt, let your hair down, and put on heels. Let your friend see that next to him is not “his boy,” but a beautiful beauty.

In fact, it is far from a rare case when a guy and a girl are friends and then fall in love. If you have such feelings, this is a pattern, because you spend a lot of time together, have known each other for a long time, and probably have common interests and views on life. It's so wonderful when your best friend becomes your favorite man. Just don’t be afraid of losing friendship, continue to remain silent, hiding what’s in your heart. The girl must understand that all this time the guy can be tormented by his feelings.

Strengthen friendships and find common interests

Use your advantages over other representatives of the fairer sex. Who, if not you, knows all the pros and cons of his character? You are aware of his hobbies and interests, you know his desires and dreams. Show your friendship, help him with something important to him. Take more interest in his affairs, support him in them, sometimes with advice, sometimes just morally. This is very valuable and attracts people.

Notice what interests you share. Common hobbies not only allow you to be close to your loved one more often, but also bring people closer together at the level of emotions, desires, and actions. In a situation where there are no common interests yet, think about which of your chosen one’s hobbies does not cause negative emotions in you and study this topic at least a little. You will have more reasons and topics for communication.

Spending time together

If friends fall in love with each other, they will prefer to be close all the time. There may be different situations in life when you may need the support and attention of a loved one. The better people are able to communicate, the more interesting their interactions can be.

Sometimes changing your status becomes quite difficult: you have to try to pay extra attention to yourself and take some steps. Spending time together regularly brings you closer together. People begin to trust even more and open up to each other. The ability to share secrets and mysteries helps strengthen the union. In fact, this is a very valuable acquisition that not everyone gets.