How to understand that a girl has cheated on you: identify and find out


Dear friend! If you are reading these lines, it means that not everything is so smooth in your relationship with your girlfriend. Most likely, you have already begun to think about whether she is cheating on you? Of course, when starting a relationship, all people plan to live happily ever after. This love that excites hearts, these wonderful moments of first timid dates, confessions, long conversations during which you forget about all your affairs and worries... And it seems that these happy moments will last forever, and a long and happy life together awaits you.

But, unfortunately, very often reality turns out to be far from our ideas. And then, at one not-so-wonderful moment, suspicions begin to creep in that the girl you love is most likely cheating. But are there any signs at all to confirm or refute these doubts? Of course they exist! Let's talk about this.

Main features

Any betrayal involves lying to your partner. And lies, according to psychologists, are revealed by the following main signs:

  • reluctance to engage in personal contact. If a person is afraid that he will give himself away, he will avoid communication, for example, instead of meetings, offering to communicate online or citing his increased busyness;
  • the person becomes more attentive and affectionate. Oddly enough, this sign can also indicate betrayal. Feeling guilty, a girl may try to show more tenderness and attention. She may start cooking gourmet meals or giving 100% in bed. Naturally, sudden changes in behavior should alert you. More often this happens if a girl cheated once and is tormented by it;
  • careful care of appearance. If a woman has started a relationship on the side, she may begin to take more care of her appearance: buy new dresses, visit beauty salons more often, do exquisite makeup when going to work or “for a walk with a friend”;
  • attempts to hide your correspondence. If, when entering a girl’s room, you notice that she quickly minimizes the dialog box on a social network, it is possible that she is communicating with her lover;
  • refusal of sex. Women are often able to “remain faithful” to only one partner. And a long refusal of sexual pleasures suggests that she satisfies her needs with another man;
  • new skills in sex. The emergence of new skills may indicate that she learned them on the side. By the way, it is impossible to understand from the vagina that a woman has cheated. This is just a myth. The vaginal tissues are highly elastic, and even if the “dignity” of the girl’s lover is much greater than yours, this will not affect the properties of the female genital organs;
  • constant conversations about another man. If a girl often begins to remember her “best friend” or colleague, it is possible that he is much closer to her than you;
  • sudden appearance of expensive things. It is possible that new jewelry, the latest model of a mobile phone or a fur coat was given by another man, even if the girl claims that she purchased them after receiving a bonus;
  • frequent absences. This sign can be noticed if you live together. When a girl starts getting carried away with evening walks or spends all Sunday shopping, while trying not to take you with her, we can assume that she is spending time with another man.

It is necessary to analyze all behavior as a whole. Individual “symptoms” do not indicate infidelity. After all, a woman can start taking care of herself on the advice of a friend or stylist, and frequent absences may well be explained by a sincere desire to spend time alone with herself. But if there are many signs and behavior has changed dramatically, it’s worth thinking about.

What to do in such a situation: advice from psychologists

It is always difficult to find out about the treason and betrayal of a girl - the closest and dearest person. But this is better than “walking around with horns” in stupid ignorance and thinking that everything is fine in your relationship. After finding out the fact of infidelity, the guy faces a choice:

READ Cheating with your wife's friend: reasons for betrayal and how to avoid it in the future

  1. Forgive. This outcome is possible if the beloved sincerely repents of her offense, asks for forgiveness and swears that this will not happen again. But in this case, the guy dooms himself to constant doubts, mistrust and torment.
  2. Breake down. If you decide to leave, then you need to keep your word. It will be difficult, but it is better to end such a relationship than to constantly worry when the girl gets ready to meet her friends. If you change it once, you will change it again. It’s better to say goodbye to traitors right away, so there’s a better chance of meeting a decent girl.
  3. Cheat. This is not a completely honest act, but you can break up with your beloved, and then once a week write her love SMS and come have sex. It turns out that you are relegating your ex-lover to the category of mistress, and at this time you are looking for a more worthy replacement.

It is not so important how exactly you can find out if a girl cheated on you. In any case, the guy will feel changes in behavior and subconsciously determine that his beloved is unfaithful to him. It is important to then find the strength within yourself and choose the right way out of the current situation.

Long distance relationship

It can be especially difficult to recognize betrayal if a man and woman are forced to be apart. For example, guys often have a bad suspicion: a girl is cheating on you while you are in the army. The easiest way to confirm your guesses is to talk to mutual friends. Perhaps they will tell you that it is time to end the relationship. Mutual friends can “cover up” for a traitor. What to do if your intuition screams about the fact of betrayal?

The following signs help determine that she is cheating and lying:

  • she communicates with you less often, quickly stops talking, and has stopped sharing details of her life. There are two options: either she is angry with you, or she has found a more interesting interlocutor;
  • Likes from the same man appear on a social network page. Of course, maybe it's just a good friend or colleague. But you should be wary;
  • she doesn't answer the phone when you call her. Girls eagerly await a call from their beloved man. If interest is lost, she may ignore calls;
  • she speaks very quickly. Accelerating the pace of speech often reveals liars. Trying to pour out a lot of information on the interlocutor, the person literally does not allow him to get a word in. This means that you will not have the opportunity to ask questions that interest you;
  • photos on social networks indicating attendance at various events. Of course, in these photographs the girl will be alone. But the question arises who is the author of the photo, because if she went to have fun with her friends, one would expect joint selfies. If you show ingenuity and try, you can use the likes left by men to find the page of a new gentleman. After all, he may have posted photos from the same events.

How can you tell if a girl has cheated on you from a distance? Track photos, monitor changes in emotional mood during communication, ask questions to mutual friends. Having accumulated a sufficient amount of “evidence”, it’s worth it directly. If a woman is not a professional actress, she will give herself away with her reaction.

Why do women cheat on their husbands?

Every girl, even in her child-parent family, learns that adultery is condemned by society. Traditional approaches to education oblige every mother to raise a girl in such a way that she develops the following qualities:

  • patience;
  • humility;
  • meekness;
  • obedience;
  • ability to obey;
  • restraint.

Women brought up in the canons of Orthodoxy and Christian culture possess these qualities. They will not dare to cheat on their husband, even if they are unhappy in their marriage. But there are fewer and fewer such women today.

How to recognize betrayal on VKontakte

On social networks, modern people find not only friends and love, but also lovers. How to understand that a girl is cheating when meeting on VKontakte? Here are some signs:

  • she began to spend more time on VKontakte than before;
  • likes from new male friends appear on her page;
  • she changed the password. Often, couples who have been in a relationship for a long time use common passwords or do not hide them from each other. If the password suddenly changed, she may be hiding her correspondence;
  • she started a fake page. Of course, this is often impossible to calculate. But if, when entering a room or looking at her smartphone out of the corner of your eye, you often see the same page, it is different from the one you know, perhaps there is a fake profile;
  • she corresponds with someone for a long time. Correspondence can be carried out at night: in this case, you may notice that the woman is online, but does not respond to your messages for a long time. This can be due to many reasons, but frequent delays indicate the presence of other, more important interlocutors. If you live together, it is easier to notice long-term correspondence.

How to understand that a girl is cheating by correspondence? This is not easy to do. After all, many people spend a lot of time on social networks, chatting with friends or looking at funny pictures. But the signs listed above, combined with the general “symptoms” of betrayal, should raise suspicions.

Sudden curiosity 3

Many ladies are extremely imprudent when they plan their cunning plan to hide their infidelity. They try to be too sympathetic and friendly so that you are happy and do not show increased interest in her. However, this is their main mistake. It is impossible to build a harmonious relationship without quarreling and arguing at least once. In addition, people may simply be tired, irritable and simply upset. It's unavoidable. However, if a girl literally shines every minute and always carefully checks your schedule, then you should be wary.

Many believe that this is exactly what a lady of the heart should be - obsequious, affectionate, eloquent. However, in fact, such a beauty simply plans when you are not at home, where you will be, so as not to cross paths. All this is necessary to compose a more or less plausible legend about your betrayal.

No one denies the fact that a friend can sometimes simply ask what time you will be back in order to have time to cook dinner or ask you to grab something from the store. But more often than not, the reality turns out to be much sadder.

How to understand that a girl cheated with her ex

Often people cannot completely erase from their lives those with whom they were once in a romantic relationship. Former lovers can maintain intimacy for years, and this often pushes them to cheat on their partner.

You can understand that a girl cheated with her ex by the following signs:

  • she periodically mentions her ex in conversations. These mentions can be negative, that is, the girl says how much worse than you was the man she dated before. This may be due to a feeling of guilt or the fact that she managed to verify your superiority experimentally;
  • she often began to leave home. This sign is common to all cheaters: to meet with a lover, you need privacy;
  • joint photos on social networks. Many men say: from the photo I realized that the girl I loved cheated on me. Photos of yourself hugging your ex are a very alarming sign;
  • Likes from her ex began to appear on her social network page or she added him as a friend after a break in communication.

Bodily changes

Many people are concerned about how you can tell from your body that your girlfriend is cheating on you. There are no direct signs, but there are several indirect ones:

  • she has lost weight or gained weight. This may be due both to nervous experiences associated with the need to constantly lie, and to the desire to please the new gentleman more; she hides her neck with a choker or scarf. After passionate sex, “material evidence” of betrayal may remain on the neck;
  • she smells like men's perfume. People who have extensive experience of “going to the left” often ask their partners not to use toilet water. After all, someone else's smell can arouse suspicion. But if the betrayal was spontaneous or the lovers were not sufficiently prudent, this evidence may appear;
  • she often takes "closed" poses. This is a common sign of lying. Closedness is indicated by crossed legs and arms, a slightly lowered head and raised shoulders. The person seems to be trying to hide, feeling ashamed or not wanting to reveal their secrets.

After a business trip

How can you tell if your other half has changed while you were on a business trip? It is worth carefully inspecting the apartment for “evidence”:

  • someone else's smell. On an instinctive level, men are often able to sense the scent of "another male" in their territory;
  • the remains of a luxurious feast. An unfinished bottle of champagne may be left over from gatherings with friends, but it may also indicate that the girl had a romantic date with her lover. Particular concern may be caused by the remains of delicious dishes prepared by a girl. As a rule, when left alone, women cook only the simplest food (if they are not into cooking);
  • guilty look. If the betrayal was one-time, the girl may feel guilty. If when you meet her, she hides her gaze, tries to avoid your touch and behaves closed and withdrawn, you should think about it.

How to understand that a girl has cheated and is hiding? You can carefully ask your neighbors what your other half was doing during your absence. Of course, you should only do this if you have good relations with your neighbors.

Where to start the investigation

If a guy understands that a girl is cheating, he has a need to confirm or refute his guesses. This is best done using the following algorithm:

  • observe behavior. A liar always gives himself away. The pace of his speech, the direction of his gaze during a conversation, his posture, and facial expressions change. Therefore, people feel lies on an intuitive level;
  • monitor activity on a social network;
  • turn to mutual friends for help. They can provide the necessary information;
  • directly. If she denies cheating, you will be able to present the available facts. Or simply break off the relationship, because a person who cheated once will do so in the future.

She doesn't have time to see you.

Let's say you used to always spend weekends together, but now she has some urgent matters. Or you went to the cinema on Wednesdays, and now she says that she signed up for courses. She refuses your proposals to spend time together, citing her constant employment.

She suddenly started going to the gym? Or did you regularly start staying late at work? Didn't you think that this was just a man's excuse?

If she dresses up, preens, turns on music and is in a playful mood, then she is going on a date with another man.

How to talk about cheating

The easiest way to determine that your loved one is cheating and lying is in the process of openly talking about it. An online test “A girl is cheating on you” or going to psychics will not allow you to get such accurate information. It is not easy to talk about such topics. It is important to follow these recommendations:

  • keep calm. Otherwise, a frank conversation will not work;
  • offer to discuss relationship problems. It is difficult for people who have experienced betrayal to admit that “going to the left” is almost always a consequence of problems in the relationship. And both partners are always to blame for them;
  • justify your suspicions. If you are sure that a girl has a lover, it is important to provide evidence;
  • ask direct questions that require clear answers. You should not allow your interlocutor to indulge in lengthy discussions, otherwise the conversation will lead nowhere.

If you want to save the relationship, focus on the reasons that led to the betrayal. Often, girls are pushed towards another man by a lack of attention from their partner, his reluctance to communicate, closedness and coldness. Surviving betrayal is not easy, but if it happened only once, you can try to save the relationship.

The main sign of betrayal is a sudden change in a person’s behavior. Increased coldness or excess attention, a sudden desire to change your appearance for the better, frequent absences... All this together causes unpleasant suspicions. It’s worth talking openly with your other half and trying to find out the truth instead of tormenting yourself with bitter thoughts. This will help either quickly solve the problem, or not continue a relationship that has long outlived its usefulness.

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