It can be quite difficult to understand that you are lovable as it is. Here the matter is complicated on a catastrophic scale by the fact that the man is married. It is unlikely that he will show his sympathy openly, unless he is a womanizer and is not looking for a one-night stand. Otherwise, you will have to strain to confirm his sympathy for yourself. Then how do you know that a married man likes you?
Every man in love with a woman shows several signs of sympathy - verbal and non-verbal. In a situation with a married man, you should rely on non-verbal communication (gestures, facial expressions, glances, body position). A person's behavior inevitably changes when he falls in love. This is what you need to pay attention to.
Attention to the eyes2
Watch how he looks at other women. If it’s difficult for you to be objective, ask a friend. You can see his sympathy for you in his eyes. If the way he looks at you is different from the way he looks at others, he looks at you more often than necessary - perhaps you made the right assumption about his liking. The hallmark will be that he looks at you until you notice, but looks away when you turn around.
We reveal all the secrets of how to understand that a guy likes you.
Love affair at work
Falling in love at work is easy as pie, since this is where colleagues spend a lot of time together. It’s not difficult to guess how a man who is not free but shows interest behaves. Random touches, signs of attention in the form of a cup of coffee, offers to drive home. So what? You are colleagues. Everything looks more than decent. The wife definitely won’t find out anything, since the husband doesn’t go anywhere except for work.
Official intrigues have many bonuses:
- the desire to please a colleague keeps the lover in good shape and encourages him to always look good;
- if this is an affair with the boss, then there is an opportunity for career growth;
- the opportunity to spend a lot of time with the object of desire and be aware of all his affairs;
- secret kisses and hugs maintain the intensity of passions for a long time;
- one thing brings people together.
But where there are pros, there will always be cons. The biggest one is - if the romance doesn’t work out or the crush passes, how can you continue to maintain a working relationship? Therefore, if at work you constantly catch the gaze of a married man, then you should understand what could happen in the future if you reciprocate his feelings.
Movements5
We are designed in such a way that at the subconscious level we try to be closer to the object of our sympathy. During a conversation, he may inadvertently lean towards you, reach out with his hand, or constantly turn towards you. It is worth paying attention to the opposite gesture: one hand is clasped on the wrist of the other. This closed posture is often taken as a signal of hostility, but it has a completely different meaning. Clasping his hands, he tries to restrain himself and prevent himself from impulsively touching you.
What to do in such a situation
You can choose one of two models of behavior : support the game being started and reciprocate, or completely stop further attempts at rapprochement. This choice depends on the desire (or reluctance) of the girl herself.
Relationships at work - to be or not to be?
How to understand yourself
Before you give free rein to your feelings (or completely extinguish them in yourself), you first need to understand what exactly caused these feelings ? And starting from this understanding, make a choice. What could attract a woman to a married young man:
- Suitability for long-term relationships . “Since he is married, that means he has some kind of value, that means he is caring, generous, loves children, and so on.”
- Consistency and responsibility . “Family life is a guarantor of financial well-being, which means that he has already learned to bear responsibility not only for himself, but also for his family.”
- Feeling of stability . It seems that he is more mature, which means that life with him will be calm and happy.
- Self-affirmation through competition . “If he is ready to cheat, that means his wife is worse, uglier, stupider, more ignorant, and so on.”
- The Forbidden fruit . Close to the previous point, a woman finds pleasure in conquering the inaccessible.
This is interesting: Nice words for a man to make him melt: in prose, in your own words, via SMS
The first three points are just stereotypes formed for some reason, they are quite deceptive, and do not at all guarantee the desired result. The second two are signs that time will be wasted, the won man will soon become uninteresting .
Some psychologists believe that women fall in love with married men only because they are not mentally ready for a “real” relationship.
This theory is confirmed by the instability and “falsity” of the mistress’s status:
- duration and at the same time frequency of relationships;
- idleness , “family is home, mistress is hotel”;
- no obligations.
One way or another, a woman is able to make a decision herself, without looking at moral principles, the condemnation of her friends or the opinions of acquaintances. The main thing in this situation is to fully accept responsibility for everything that happens.
You need to be aware of the consequences of your choice:
- Guilt . To what extent do her moral principles conflict with such a relationship? Will she worry about what her relatives, friends or acquaintances will say?
- Collision with reality . Is she ready to put up with the possible shortcomings of a man? What if in family life he shows greed, grumpiness, tediousness or excessive demands?
- Past . Will she be able to accept his past? Is she ready to find a common language with his (possibly negative) relatives, friends or children?
- Jealousy . Will she be bothered by the fact that he is cheating on his wife? Doesn't this mean that he will cheat on her too?
All these consequences need to be thought through in advance, while trying to think objectively.
How to Deal with Feelings for a Married Coworker
With the right attitude, the fading of love occurs in 2-3 months, in order to overcome love it will take 2-3 years.
Having an affair with your boss is a dubious idea
How to behave to overcome attraction:
- avoid negativity - try to accept your feelings, not treat them with bitterness;
- stop - stop all thoughts about this man;
- step back - observe your feelings, do not try to force them out of yourself;
- reduce communication - every meeting and every conversation will become an occasion for dreams and hopes;
- meet other men and - as they say, “knock out fire with fire”;
- watch less TV series and read more (but not romance literature) - falling in love is typical of romantic natures, you need to try to be more practical.
This is interesting: Platonic love: what it is and how it manifests itself
Avoidance 8
Sometimes men do not show any signs of attention to the girl they fall in love with. If a man was previously absolutely faithful to his wife, then he will be afraid of the appearance of interest in you. Most often, this manifests itself in deliberate avoidance of meetings, coldness, refusal to attend an event where you will be, citing unconvincing excuses.
But this behavior should not be confused with rudeness. If a man avoids you, perhaps he is in love, but if he is rude to you and simply treats you with disrespect, there can be no question of any love. After all, respect and human attitude are the basis for falling in love.
How can you tell if a married man loves you?
In the company of friends and acquaintances, he tries to have minimal contact with you so as not to arouse suspicion. He speaks deliberately distantly and coldly about you to his wife and tries to distract her by showing attention.
A man with a ring on his ring finger is in no hurry to reveal his feelings even to the one who captured his heart. While he does not know what to expect from his new passion, he will study her behavior, convincing himself that she is a reliable person.
If he considers that his beloved is a worthy contender to take a place in his heart, he will not hide his marital status. Married people tend to exaggerate, so you can safely divide his stories about problems with his wife into two.
Take the test and find out what your chances are of getting your husband back
A little experiment 9
No matter how hard a man tries to hide his attitude towards you, his jealousy will be immediately visible. You can play on this. Start an innocent flirtation with another man in his company or pretend that a man in whom you are interested called you. His look will immediately change, he will show dissatisfaction or grief. It may not be expressed in words, but non-verbal language speaks for itself. If his behavior has changed during your flirting, draw conclusions about his attitude towards you.
Men who are married are much more careful in expressing their feelings. If you are interested in this man, sometimes you need to make the first move to show your interest.
And how to understand that a man is married, you will learn from our article further on the link.
Wife's view
No matter how a man tries to hide his love, the wife acutely feels the chill from her husband and the appearance of a homewrecker. If your husband has fallen in love with another girl, his behavior may show one or more of the following signs:
- He begins to take particular care of his appearance and hygiene: he showers often, chooses a new perfume, and buys new clothes. If a husband who had no love for sports before suddenly signed up for a gym, this could be a wake-up call. Does he watch his diet and change his wardrobe? Got a trendy haircut? Something is clearly wrong here.
- He often stays at work overtime, takes on new projects, and goes on business trips. If such sudden hard work does not bring additional income, this means that he is either saving money to make a surprise, or a new expense item has appeared in your family.
- He forgets significant dates, avoids spending holidays and weekends together, tries to spend as little time together as possible and avoids intimate conversations.
- The husband suddenly became generous and began giving gifts, helping with household chores and doing things he usually wouldn’t do. Most likely, he is ashamed of his feelings for another woman.
- The marital bed became exclusively a place for sleeping. He has 1000 and 1 excuses not to have sex.
If you notice one or two of the above points in your spouse, you should be wary, but do not panic under any circumstances; it is possible that your suspicions are unfounded.
Take the test and find out what your chances are of getting your husband back
Showing sincere sympathy for a male colleague
The sincere feeling of a colleague, especially when a woman also likes him, is pleasant, but people rarely decide to have an office romance. According to statistics, such relationships end quickly and badly.
Important! An unsuccessful office romance is a real punishment, especially when former lovers are forced to continue their joint professional activities.
On the other hand, where else can a single lady find a reliable man’s shoulder if not at work, because many people spend most of their time there. In addition, it is much easier to form an opinion about a man with whom you are constantly close.
You can detect manifestations of sincere sympathy in a male colleague based on several signs:
When a lover appeals to sympathy, the timbre of his voice changes to a softer one. He gets nervous when talking, allows strange pauses when choosing his words. He will be the first to notice the slightest change in a woman and give her a compliment.
A man who is infatuated with a colleague will be intrusive, offering help, inviting him to lunch, pestering him on social networks with comments, likes and other actions. He will be jealous even if nothing interesting has happened between you yet.
If the woman is married
It also happens that when both partners are not free, feelings can suddenly flare up between them. Explaining why a married man falls in love with another woman who is also married can be difficult. Most often, such relationships are accompanied by correspondence on the Internet. They will meet rarely, and there will not be many gifts, since it is unsafe.
It is known that a married man and a married woman understand perfectly well that their relationship will not last long, so they carefully hide their feelings. There is an opinion that a married man still prefers a relationship with a married lady, since she always knows what she wants and will not demand much from him. The main reason why a married woman needs such a relationship lies in her fatigue from constant life, which deprives her of joy in life. In addition, such relationships on the side help her diversify her sex life a little.
Such a woman will not demand constant attention from a man and will even calmly react to the fact that he is late for a meeting or does not come at all. She will never cause scandals, and she doesn’t need gifts.
How a work colleague shows his sympathy in an informal setting
If a lady is tired of understatement and games, a man can be provoked into openly showing interest.
A joint business trip, corporate event, or other time spent in an informal setting outside of work can encourage frankness:
- Outside the office, in the company of a girl he likes, a man demonstrates his feelings more openly and boldly.
- When talking to her, he tilts his head to his shoulder, turning his whole body towards his interlocutor.
- He doesn’t look away, and if he gets even bolder, he looks at his neck - this is a clear sign of sympathy.
- He tries to touch the woman, a cautious, unobtrusive gesture.
- Smiles, fusses, jokes inappropriately.
If in public a man is a flint, his true feelings cannot be guessed, but in a non-work environment he behaves as described, then he is definitely in love.
