How to Stop Being a Loser in 10 Simple Steps

It would seem that all people in the world are equal.
But for some, fortune accompanies them throughout their entire journey, while others stagnate in one place all their lives, considering themselves losers. Despair gradually leads a loser astray from his intended path: plans collapse, and even minor goals seem unattainable. What is the reason for stagnation, and how to finally become successful?

You don't value time

Losers don't value their time at all.
Any successful person will tell you that time is our most valuable resource. People who achieve success value time even more than money. What's your job? We read Twitter, visited a site like Fishki.net or Bash.im, liked photos on Facebook and VKontakte. But you make plans every year. Every year you promise yourself that “this year I will really work.” And everything is new. Your plans are not destined to come true. This is because you are not devoting the required amount of time to completing tasks. Learn to manage your time, learn to say “no” - this will be a good step towards success in any area of ​​your life.

Badly brought up

A loser behaves like an ill-mannered person. Late for meetings, violates agreements, does not follow rules. He loves to get into arguments, apparently believing that in this way he proves his superiority. Dresses incorrectly: he may show up for a job interview in shorts and unshaven, not understanding that his unconventionality should be shown in business, and not in neglecting generally accepted norms. Meanwhile, according to the famous American business coach Jim Rohn, success is a few simple rules that are followed daily, and failure is a few mistakes that are also made daily.

Losers are not born - they are made, say knowledgeable people. Remember: your life is in your hands. Don't be afraid to act, take responsibility, and luck will smile on you.

© Ilyina Natalia, BBF.RU

You're not doing things that align with your goals.

It's not difficult to make decisions when you know what your values ​​are.

Roy Disney

Outsiders confuse busyness with productivity. It is a mistaken belief that productivity directly depends on employment. That's why losers take on everything. They take part in anything. As a result, they scatter their efforts into nowhere. The only thing they don't focus their efforts on is their goals and their values.

Write down your goals and strategy for achieving them. This will help you determine where you really need to focus your efforts. “The more important you consider it, the more likely you will accomplish a task.”

Conquer your fears and concerns

I feel like nothing. Such an attitude towards yourself will be impossible, because, approaching the final stage, you will already have something to be proud of. But to be completely satisfied, you need to take a few more steps:

1. Select the optimal operating mode. An increase in the hormone cortisol leads to negative changes in the body. To prevent this from happening, it is necessary to provide the brain with rest, since it is necessary to restore moral and spiritual strength.
2. Control your emotions. You should not give in to impulsive desires and whims, and anxiety and fear must be kept under control.
3. Listen to objective opinions from outsiders. It is necessary to find a person whom you can trust and consult with him on certain issues. Your own point of view and an outside view will help to recreate the true picture of what is happening.
4. Normalize activity. Active activity suppresses fear. In order not to repeat “I feel useless,” it is better to do something than to sit and be afraid.
5. Abstract yourself from negativity. It is recommended to think exclusively positively and not project negative experiences (your own and others) onto yourself. The expressions “I’m always unlucky” or “something bad always happens to me” should be permanently eliminated from your vocabulary.
6. Avoid extremes. Since there are many shades between black and white in life, it is a wise decision to try not to be so categorical. It is necessary to consider the situation from different angles, be flexible and always be able to find a compromise.

To summarize, it should be said that thoughts and expressions like “I feel like nothing” have no place in a person’s head. Every individual is an individual who deserves respect. You cannot underestimate yourself, give up and mourn your difficult and unpromising life. It is necessary to try the above method; it must bring positive results. And such thoughts will be regarded as temporary weakness or seasonal melancholy. She passed as soon as the gentle sun appeared in the sky.

You don't know how to communicate and treat people

You can easily judge a person's character by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.

Johann Goethe

Losers have no social skills. “At least I’m being honest,” “I am who I am, deal with it,” these are the phrases that losers say. Unsuccessful people behave arrogantly without any reason to do so. Who likes show-offs? So don't be one! It's very easy to be nice and polite to someone you like. And you try to behave well with someone from whom you cannot get anything.

There is an excellent saying that the best way to test a person's character is to look at his behavior in line and his attitude towards the service staff. Another good way to get to know a person is to look at their reaction when you ruin their thing.

Belief in the injustice of fate towards oneself

Losers tend to complain about their problems, they are ready to talk about them all day long.

They often blame everyone but themselves for their failures. This attracts negativity, plus no one wants to communicate with such an interlocutor.

Reluctance to have breakfast and drinking coffee

It has been proven that the body's productivity is highest in the morning. Therefore, important tasks must be completed before noon. Skipping breakfast greatly depletes the body until lunch.

And morning coffee does not have the best effect on your health; it is better to drink a glass of water with lemon in the morning.

Inability to perceive the emotions of others

If a person does not understand how others feel at the moment, it will be difficult for him to break out in society and take a leading position. Thanks to the ability to read the emotions of others, you can easily adapt to people.

Desire to develop in one direction

Every member of society has his own skills and abilities in which he is ideal. But successful individuals are not limited to this; they tend to constantly learn in order to improve.

It is important to understand that smart and successful people develop, you need to follow them

Representation by full name

It’s an amazing fact, but the more simply a person calls himself by name, the more successful he is. Short names look more attractive, open and always inspire confidence in society.

A striking example is the billionaires of our time, for example, William Henry Gates III simply calls himself Bill Gates.

Lack of style in clothing and excessive fatness

When society sees an overweight person in shapeless clothes, it creates the feeling that he does not know what self-control and good taste are.

Fit and slender individuals always attract the attention of others and command respect

Inability to refuse a request

Only those who are confident in themselves and are ready to fight for their interests can afford to refuse or object. To succeed, you need to be able to refuse people and object; this is a striking feature of successful individuals.

Rare display of feelings

By paying attention to loved ones, a successful person feels satisfied and happier, because he knows that his loved ones will support him at any moment. Kisses and hugs significantly improve immunity by reducing stress

In fact, becoming successful is not so difficult, the main thing is to take the above tips into account in your life every day.

Photo: Pixabay

You put everything off until later

The funny thing is that losers call themselves the fashionable word “procrastinators.” And they are absolutely not ashamed of it. They don't understand the value of time at all. They are quite content to live in yesterday. Losers live as if they have another life left. But in reality, no one has the opportunity to pause life or rewind a little. Realize that you are dying from the moment you are born. Every day is a gift. You can do whatever you want, but keep in mind that tomorrow may not exist.

Examples of replacing limiting settings

Change the wording gradually, without rushing. We caught 2-3 in our heads, reformulated them, and worked with a positive attitude for 3 weeks. And only then did we take on the next one. You may have your own list of limiting beliefs.

There are several more articles on my blog dedicated to self-development:

• Think and live positively;
• How to enjoy every day.

With faith in your success, Svetlana Vasenovich

You don't know how to deal with difficulties

There is one legend. It says that once upon a time there lived a shepherd who was small in stature and was not a warrior. He looked at the giant and said: “I will overcome you and cut off your head!” - and did it. The tests are only as difficult as you imagine and as your weakness allows. Losers don't understand this and quickly give up. They give up the moment the situation becomes uncomfortable.

There are no roses without thorns, children without labor and rainbows without thunderstorms. Trials not only bring us closer to our goals, but also make us into people we never dreamed of becoming. Don't be afraid of fears, fight them. This will open up new spaces for you. Yes, yes, we are again talking about the need to get out of your comfort zone. To find out your strength, you need to fight.

How to get rid of failure and become successful in 10 simple steps - instructions that work

Loser is not a death sentence! This is a reason to start working on yourself.

Of course, a miracle won’t happen on the first day, but heaven pats you on the head even for the intention. What can we say about constantly working on yourself - you are simply doomed to success!

And simple rules will help you get rid of bad luck:

1. The first and most important step to success: stop whining! Don't complain to anyone about life. To no one, never, to anything. And forget words like terrible, bad, disgusting, etc. If you are asked “how are you doing?” always answer “great!”
2. Give up negativity in your thoughts, in your forecasts, in your own programs for the near future. No anger, envy, greed, etc. Conquering the chaos in your own head is extremely important in order to bring order to life in general. How to become more positive in life?
3. We fight fears - and learn to take risks! Do not doubt, do not hesitate and do not be afraid: just forward! The worst thing that can happen is that you will gain new life experiences. Therefore, we boldly look for a better job, change our place of residence and generally shake up our swamp.
4. We begin to love ourselves. This does not mean sending everyone away, walking over the corpses and thinking only about yourself. This means stopping suffering, scolding yourself, feeling sorry and condemning, etc. Learn to treat yourself with respect. Value your time and your talents. Learn to analyze and adequately assess your capabilities.
5. Diversify your life. The swamp is for losers. Be constantly on the move: communicate, travel and walk more, meet people, get a couple of hobbies, change your appearance and style, behavior and routes, etc.
6. Program yourself only for success! Do you have an important meeting or call ahead? Or are you waiting for an interview? Or do you want to invite your future (as you would like) soul mate on a date? Don't be afraid of rejection, failure, collapse. Failure is just an experience! And you can only perceive it in this way - drawing conclusions and remembering your mistakes. The main thing is not to be afraid!
7. Create your own plan for success. Start with a small goal that you have already stopped dreaming about, because “it won’t work anyway.” Consider all the steps that can lead you to this goal and take action. The one who walks will master the road!
8. Surround yourself with positivity! Communicate only with positive, successful people, watch positive motivational films, read the right books, choose pleasant routes, surround yourself with pleasant things.
9. Stop being lazy and wasting time . Give yourself an hour a day when you can be lazy, lie on the couch, read your feed on social networks, correspond without a purpose - for the mood, etc. Devote the rest of your time to working on yourself: read, study, communicate, develop willpower, fight bad habits.
10. Constantly go beyond your usual boundaries. Expand your horizons in everything. Who said you can only be a carrot seller? Maybe there is a future famous musician in you who just needs a team and a little kick in the direction of success? Who said that you need to live where you were born? Travel! What if your city is not here at all?

And, of course, remember that you deserve happiness too. You need to believe in yourself. Self-confidence is a magnet for success.

But you must clearly understand what you want from life , and what in your opinion is a successful person. What settings you set for yourself - that’s how life will respond.

The site Colady.ru thanks you for your attention to the article! We will be very pleased if you share your feedback and tips in the comments below.

You are apathetic

You don't have an opinion and you can't make decisions. Unable to carry on intelligent conversations, unable to think openly if the topic is not from your area of ​​expertise. Losers think that everyone should think the same way as them. Unsuccessful people don't read or study after school. At most, they graduate from college because “that’s the way it should be.” Even if they don't reach the limit of their potential, they don't care. They are capable of getting bored in a world of joy and miracles.

The quietest killer is apathy. Find yourself a hobby, do it. Even if you don't get paid for it. For now. Use your talent and find a use for it.

I feel sorry for myself

A loser always feels sorry for himself. If he had been born into a professorial family, and not into a working class one, completely different opportunities would have opened up for him. If only I lived in the capital, and not in a provincial town, I would find a good job and receive a large salary. If only I had received a different education, I would now be a boss, and not an always pushing subordinate... And tears come to my eyes, and self-pity threatens to drown my soul. You should not feel sorry for yourself, but praise yourself. Look for the pros, not the cons, in your situation. And think about how to change circumstances.

Why did I become a loser

“How to live if you feel insignificant?” - such thoughts come to the minds of completely different people: choleric people and phlegmatic people, lovers of life and misanthropes, introverts and extroverts, optimists and pessimists. Temporary despondency has gripped each of us at some point in time, only to a greater or lesser extent. Since material well-being is a priority in all aspects of life, it is generally considered to be the main factor of luck. To some extent, this is true, since a person needs a certain amount of money every day in order not to die of hunger. At the same time, each of us knows that money cannot fully satisfy human needs, especially with regard to moral aspects. A worthless person feels like such when he is not loved, disrespected, or simply ignored. And the degree of his worries, believe me, does not depend in any way on the amount of deposits in his accounts.

In support of the above thought, we can recall great people who remained in poverty during their lifetime and only received recognition after death. Can they really be called losers, since they have gained worldwide popularity? We consider them the most successful, but neither Van Gogh, nor Gauguin, nor hundreds of other masters unrecognized during their lifetime were able to experience the rays of glory. They suffered and needed an extra penny, considering themselves the most insignificant people in the world.

A successful person is constantly learning

Successful individuals are constantly learning. The desire to acquire new knowledge increases their level of self-improvement, not only on a personal level, but also on a professional level. It is very important to acquire simple habits such as reading books, writing and professional communication. Self-development helps you change character traits, get rid of negative habits and improve positive qualities that are necessary for success. Constant training, attending master classes, studying useful information - these are all its elements.

Be brave and determined

A person will never be able to say about himself that I am a nonentity if he listens to the following advice:

1. Set yourself up for the long term. Only reasonable planning will lead to the long-awaited victory; quick successes are not always the key to well-being.
2. Don't despair. You shouldn’t feel sorry for yourself and analyze failures for a long time, this will turn into a useless waste of time. You need to draw the necessary conclusions and begin another attempt to improve your life.
3. Don't stop halfway. If everything is going well, but the real result has not yet been achieved, do not stop. Not everything can change overnight, you need to be patient.
4. Don't stop moving towards success. Even if you have almost no strength left, you need to take a little rest and move on. Real victories do not come on their own; they must be won. This is what all successful people did.

Miraculous transformation

It's time to decide why I still feel worthless and what needs to be done to get rid of this obsessive thought. If a person was able to give himself a characteristic (even the most negative), he already deserves praise. Only those who are unable to evaluate themselves remain a loser until the end of their days. The saddest thing is that he himself does not realize this; the people around him give him such an assessment. And this is much worse than excessive self-criticism. It is the lack of self-confidence that is the driving force for changing the situation for the better, so you should not panic, but rather actively take action.

The best advice on how to stop feeling worthless is a call to action. It is safe to say that in thirty days a person can feel a real result if he adheres to the thirty rules. To do this, you must make every effort not to forget any of them. One new recommendation must be added every day. They are classified into specific sections; they can be swapped if desired (but just don’t get confused). To begin with, it is recommended that you familiarize yourself with the complete list of all the rules, and then begin to gradually master it.

What to do?

“Every person is the architect of his own happiness” - the old saying of great-grandfathers has acquired a new meaning. Let's look at this with a simple example. Think to yourself what doesn't suit you in life. This includes both appearance and simply life aspects. For example, let's take the well-known completeness. The fight against excess weight begins in the head, otherwise nothing will come of it. Those who are losing weight can surround themselves with things like those who have already lost weight. For example, buy a smaller item, or a sports bike.

Besides this, everything, absolutely everything that was present in the housing during his life “as a full person” needs to be changed. For example, rearrange the furniture, change the curtains, change the tablecloth on the table, move huge things out of sight, etc. Primitive, at first glance, advice has a large psychological basis. You just start leading a different life, in a different environment, as if you had never been overweight, and you will see that it will have an effect. No more dieting. Your body will begin to look for products that suit it to help you lose weight.

Surround yourself with pictures of people in great shape, and imagine yourself like that too. It works! Thus, you program yourself to voluntarily lead a healthy lifestyle. Donuts, chocolate, cola - all this will not give you taste pleasure, because now you have a goal to lose excess weight. Your brain itself will automatically limit you to unhealthy diets, force you to go in for sports, and become what you want. It is quite possible! You just have to believe in it. And the formula here is simple. Eat less, eat right, exercise - lose weight. However, this formula only works when you program yourself for it, namely, believe that you will someday become slim. The same goes for life goals.

The disease of modern man is that he is exposed to the enormous influence of unnecessary information. TV, the Internet - all this is replete with various news, it takes a huge amount of time to properly understand it. Learn to separate useful information from useless information - don't waste your time.