When women are faced with love addiction, most of all they want to know how to stop thinking about a man. Thoughts about your lover deprive you of sleep, vitality and motivation to do anything. Finding spiritual harmony requires a lot of strength and patience. The main thing is that you should not delay the “treatment” of a love illness.
Codependency
Love addiction is a dangerous emotional fixation that not only poisons life, but also harms health. Despite the fact that doctors do not consider codependency a pathology, such addiction can lead to obsessive states. To get rid of a depressing illness, it is necessary to diagnose its presence in time. Only after realizing the problem will you be able to effectively use information on how not to think about the man you love.
Signs of love addiction
Girls who find themselves emotionally dependent on a man have an atrophied idea of love.
Reference. Women believe that they can only find peace, security and confidence at the expense of their beloved young man.
In other words, girls’ love is directed not at their partner, but at themselves. That is why dependence on a guy is often accompanied by various manipulations and psychological games.
Unhappy woman
You can detect a love addiction yourself, based on the following signs:
- Having a strong feeling that happiness is possible only when the object of dependence is nearby and surrounds you with care, warmth and love.
- Without relationships, life becomes a burden. The absence of a loved one nearby causes terrible anger, despondency and depression.
- Any women who try to talk to a man for any reason, no matter how insignificant, are perceived as rivals.
- Interest in other representatives of the stronger sex disappears. There is no desire to meet new people.
- With love addiction, the girl idealizes her lover. A woman cannot give a realistic assessment of a young man's shortcomings. If they are pointed out by relatives or friends, he demonstrates an aggressive defensive reaction.
- All the girl’s conversations come down to conversations about her beloved man.
- Love addiction is characterized by the presence of a strong feeling of guilt. An addicted girl only blames herself for breaking up with her lover.
- A woman suffering from love addiction does not pay attention to her own needs, desires and feelings. A person in love cares only about the life of her beloved.
Other possible options to quickly forget a love relationship with a married man
A visit to a psychologist when a separation from a married man occurs is considered the best option, but in addition to this, you can try to cope with the current situation on your own.
Eg:
1. Change your image. You can go directly to a stylist, makeup artist, or visit a beauty salon;
visiting a beauty salon is a great option
2. A good option would be to distract yourself with some activities that will bring only positive emotions. If possible, the best option would be to go on a vacation trip, for example, to the sea, or engage in some exciting extreme sports;
seaside holidays are the best medicine
3. You shouldn’t just sit at home and be depressed; you can go to the cinema, theater, concert of your favorite artist, or attend other entertainment programs.
going to the cinema or theater is also a great way to distract and unwind
Reasons that won't let you forget
How to make a man think about you constantly and miss you
Love addiction is similar in structure to alcohol or drug addiction. Most often, people who lack self-confidence and are unable to make decisions and cope with problems on their own are subject to addiction.
Important! A weak woman is confident that a man can overcome all troubles. Therefore, the loss of a strong partner is perceived by a lady as a mental catastrophe.
In this regard, the girl is not able to “get out of her head” thoughts about the guy who is the “key” to solving her problems.
Girl misses boyfriend
In addition to the childish nature of a girl, the following behavioral factors can prevent her from forgetting a man:
- The initiative to break up comes from the man. Human psychology is such that wounded pride can unconsciously transform into love addiction. The desire to return a partner is not associated with bright feelings, but with selfish motives for revenge. A girl cannot always track her own needs on her own.
- If your beloved man is married, being fixated on him may indicate an unconscious fear of serious relationships with single guys. Fear of feelings, building a family, and having children often provokes a fixation of attention on unfree young people.
- Fear of loneliness can prevent you from forgetting a man. Uncertainty about their own attractiveness often pushes women into love addiction. Representatives of the fair sex may feel that no one else will be able to pay attention to them. Therefore, they will try with all their might to return the guy with whom they already had an affair.
- If a girl works or studies with a guy in the same institution, it is quite difficult to get thoughts about him out of her head. Every time she meets her beloved colleague, a woman will unconsciously think, fantasize and return to her memory of the time when she was happy.
Why a woman’s relationship with a married man cannot end in marriage
First of all, you need to understand that relationships with married men almost always end in separation, since they very rarely leave their wives.
The reasons may be different, for example:
- In a legal marriage, a man has children who are dear to him, and he does not want to leave them until he puts them on their feet;
- Despite the fact that the husband is often absent, supposedly on business or on a business trip, there are no scandals or bickering in his family. He is always welcome at home, this suits him quite well;
- Of no small importance for men is both a sense of duty and respect for their lawful soul mate if she has health problems;
- The man simply does not want to change the existing situation, so he comes up with various “excuses”.
Another reason why a relationship ends directly between a woman and a married man is considered to be a change in status if he divorces and marries his mistress. Family routine can radically change everything, which leads to the end of the relationship.
When to cut him out of your life
How to become confident and increase self-esteem for women and men
To fight for a loved one or to break up - such thoughts often torment the heads of people in love.
Leave a man
When doubts overcome, psychologists recommend familiarizing yourself with the main reasons that indicate the futility of a relationship:
- If a young man is married and does not intend to get a divorce. You should not hope that over time the man will change his decision. It is necessary to terminate such communication as soon as possible.
- If a young man stops calling and supporting in difficult situations, and prefers to spend his weekends in the steam room with friends, then one should not idealize his nature.
- If a guy immediately found a new companion after breaking up, it means he didn’t have strong feelings. Therefore, you should not “knock on a closed door.”
- If a man spreads unflattering rumors or tells intimate details of a former relationship, you should not fight for the love of such a specimen. It will be difficult to rely on the young man in the future.
- If a guy openly says that he has no feelings, you shouldn’t be humiliated. Making someone fall in love will not work. Therefore, it is better to leave the person alone.
- If a woman is married and does not intend to live separately from her husband, it is better to drive away thoughts about the guy she likes.
How to survive a breakup with your lover
Women are more susceptible to emotional experiences, fall in love more easily, and are more likely to mistake light flirting and infatuation for love. In conversations with psychologists, most girls admit that they are ready not only to cheat on their husband, but to consciously destroy the marriage and begin to build a relationship with a man for whom they have deep feelings, but have not yet had intimacy. Psychologists call this kind of betrayal emotional and believe that it is precisely this that is most dangerous for marital relationships.
But how can you not think about your lover all the time if your relationship is already an established fact? To begin with, be aware that, most likely, your novel is doomed to failure. Yes, to support you, your friends will tell you about someone whose fleeting fling has grown into strong family ties. Perhaps you even know this lucky girl yourself. But, intoxicated by the novelty of the relationship, you don't want to hear about the pitfalls of marrying your ex-lover. Yes, yes, everything will be different for you, and you will not face sleepless nights and tears in your pillow, remorse and worries about children, resentment from general reproach and condemnation, exhausting divorce proceedings, division of property, nervous breakdowns and acquired diseases. I would like to sincerely wish you to avoid all these troubles, but believe me, this does not happen.
It may also happen that when all the difficulties are left behind, your lover will change his mind about getting married. The role of a playboy, and not yet burdened by marriage, will seem much more profitable to him than creating a new family and the danger of stepping on the same rake. Often a man starts a relationship with a pretty married woman because it is convenient for him. He does not take them seriously, does not seek to court them, and certainly will not make attempts to take you away from your legal spouse. It’s so convenient for a man: a woman doesn’t harass him with reproaches, talk of divorce or hints about marriage. Most likely, he will generally try not to advertise your connection, which is based only on physical pleasure. He is not interested in a woman's emotional depression. Before you start an affair, think about how it will turn out for you. But if the inevitable has already happened, take advantage of the advice of experienced psychologists on how to break off a relationship and stop thinking about a lover who doesn’t need you.
What to do to forget
How to stop being afraid of everything in the world
Sadness and pain after a breakup are normal reactions to loss. To stop suffering and start a full life without the man she loves, a girl needs to live through these negative emotions.
Reference! If a person is able to cope with difficult feelings, this indicates his emotional maturity.
Parting
If a woman decides to find out how to stop suffering for a beloved man who does not need her, then she has embarked on the path of “recovery.” In order for addiction to go away in the least painful way, it is necessary to take a comprehensive approach to the choice of methods of “treating” addiction.
Ways to stop suffering over your ex
There are many ways to get rid of love addiction. Psychologists recommend first of all paying attention to the following options:
- Negative emotions should not be suppressed. If you want to cry, you need to shed tears. If you feel like hitting a pillow or screaming, you need to allow yourself to let off steam.
- There is no need to hush up the problem. You can tell your friends or a psychologist about the “burden on your heart.” Talking to yourself helps a lot.
- After getting rid of negativity, you need to fill the “emptiness” with positive emotions. You can replenish the deficiency of serotonin (the hormone of happiness) with the help of interesting and varied activities: sports, dancing, travel. You should plan your day minute by minute so that there is no free time for worries, sad thoughts and figuring out why the guy left.
- It is necessary to throw away all things from the house or put them in the attic that remind you of your beloved.
- Psychologists advise using auto-training, which helps stop self-flagellation and increase self-esteem. It is enough to say the following phrases in front of the mirror every morning: “I am beautiful,” “I am successful,” “My friends love me,” “I am a good housewife.” You can come up with your own expressions.
- The best way to forget a man is to surround yourself with other representatives of the stronger sex. The more friendly communication you have with a variety of young people, the faster thoughts about your lover will fade into the background.
Take your mind off your thoughts
Go to a club or an exhibition where there will be other people and you can communicate with diverse personalities, maybe you will meet there an even better man who will win your heart. Everything happens in our lives, and even such accidents are natural, whoever believes in them. Thoughts are material.
Read more: How to get out of your comfort zone?
For introverts, a suitable way to register on a dating site and chat with men, but be prepared, not all of them are “Alpha Males” and you will have to try to find a suitable man.
And then there is Speed Dating, which you have seen in foreign films, where people move from table to table and communicate with each other for 5 minutes and then arrange meetings with the candidates they like. I personally didn’t take part in such events, but I think it’s very cool to have fun in this way
You just need to get distracted, to be honest, this method is unlikely to help just like that, without following the recommendations described above, but nevertheless, if everything is not so bad for you, then just getting distracted will help.
Is it worth starting a new relationship?
“They knock out a wedge with a wedge,” friends often call a woman in a state of grief to this folk wisdom. Ladies mistakenly believe that after a failed relationship it is necessary to immediately start a new one in order to get rid of mental torment.
Additional Information! “Rebound” is what Western psychologists call a substitutionary novel, which is translated from English. language means “return”, “rollback” or “restoration”.
The paradox of this “way out” of the situation is that such a connection has nothing in common with a mature relationship.
New acquaintance
Entering into a new romantic adventure does not allow you to deal with old grievances and experiences. Until a woman consciously crosses out her former love, analyzes all her mistakes and understands what she really wants from her partner, all unresolved problems will “transition” into a rebound union.
Most common mistakes
After breaking up with a man, women often make a lot of mistakes. Common options include:
- Threats, including suicide. Impressionable guys, out of fear for a girl, can resume a relationship, but such a relationship will not bring happiness.
- Gifts should not be required to be returned. A man should not give away what was accepted in a relationship. You shouldn't make a guy feel obligated in this way.
- Attempts to exert influence through mutual friends and acquaintances. You should not involve third parties in disputes. Such behavior will cause aggression in a man.
- The pursuit. You shouldn’t track down a guy, call, write on social networks and look for meetings. Obsession will push you away even more.
- Ladies often turn to black magic and conspiracies. A love spell is a sin that will not bring peace of mind and love. The guy still won't be able to live with a woman.
- There is no need to invent a non-existent pregnancy. The man will not marry anyway; his opinion of the girl will worsen after such an act.
- You should not agree to maintain friendly relations. The offer to remain friends is often caused by the desire to maintain a “backup airfield.” Some guys feel like they owe it to them out of guilt. Friendship will not help you return your lover, but it will provoke the emergence of love addiction.
- You should not try to relieve pain with alcohol, drugs or promiscuity. Such behavior will worsen health, quality of life and worsen already low self-esteem.
Love addiction will not bring happiness. With or without a man by your side, constant addiction deprives you of vitality and destroys your personality. If you lack the strength to cope with the problem on your own, it is better to seek help from a psychologist or psychotherapist. By working together we can destroy destructive feelings.
What awaits a woman who decides to eat the forbidden fruit?
- Wasted years of life “eating scraps” from someone else’s table. Of course, a man develops an attachment to a secret admirer, but still this is not a reason for divorce in most cases.
- A married man takes the place of a normal man. Of course, here you can think that he is the one and only half. And the longer such reflections, the more endlessly the suffering and life on the sidelines continue.
- False hopes, shattered illusions. If such a relationship has lasted for more than a year, and there is no sign of divorce, then such an outcome is unlikely to happen at all.
- Constant pain from lies, jealousy and falling self-esteem. It’s only at first that it seems that everything will end as easily, carefree as it began. But that's not true.
- No one has repealed the boomerang law. You need to put yourself in the shoes of others and only then will the right choice be made. The best solution is to break off the harmful relationship and start building your life. A love triangle is a complex organism, and everyone makes their own contribution to its occurrence.
- From the point of view of social condemnation, mistresses have the most difficult time. She will be lucky if she manages to get an appointment with a psychologist and she will be able to take responsibility for her life. Otherwise, you can wait for years until some decision is made by itself.
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