Everything in your life is connected only with your partner
It's normal to think about your partner throughout the day. After all, relationships really are a big part of our lives. But when the whole world begins to “revolve” around the partner, and other important things fade into the background, this may indicate an excessive fixation on the relationship.
Diane Dorell, a dating coach and author of The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again, says ruminating about your partner can be disruptive to your work and personal life. For example, when you can’t concentrate on work because you’re constantly wondering where your partner is and what he’s doing. Or when you communicate with a friend, while simultaneously corresponding with him on social networks. Agree, this brings discomfort and the feeling that you are not too interested in your own life.
A new romance is another candy-bouquet period
My friend, having broken up with a guy she had been dating since school, admitted that, remembering the beginning of their romance, she thought: “Will I never have this again?” And there really was something to be sad about. The beginning of a relationship is a pleasure for both. A man and a woman like each other, but do not declare it openly. They flirt and meet from time to time. They don’t quarrel because there are no hard feelings or understatements between them yet. Their first touches to each other are the most pleasant, because they have not yet become habitual.
This exciting period lasts before the first sex and for some time after. Then people become closer, and their relationships become simpler. So take each of your novels as a bonus and an opportunity to enjoy life once again.
You talk about your relationship too often
Meetings with friends are a great occasion to discuss business, interests and news. But if you constantly talk only about your relationship with your partner, you are definitely too focused on it.
Firstly, this behavior may begin to annoy your friends over time. It's normal that they may not be interested in all the facts of your personal life and constant stories about your partner. If every topic of conversation, even about the weather or city news, is translated by you into an enthusiastic story about how you and your partner are building relationships, you can safely say that you are excessively fixated on them.
Secondly, such conversations can often indicate problems in the relationship. For example, when you tell how you had a wonderful vacation, embellishing the facts to present your chosen one from the best side.
Breakups will toughen you up
The first breakup is more difficult to deal with than subsequent ones. Suffice it to recall Ivan Bunin’s story “Mitya’s Love.” Mitya, having left his girlfriend Katya for the village, falls into a love addiction. His mood is influenced by her letters, and if there are none, he goes crazy. If Mitya had found the strength to survive this period of melancholy and despair, he would have accepted further failures in his personal life more easily.
Mental anguish strengthens character, and over time a person learns to switch attention to work, sports, and friends. And then the emotional state becomes more stable.
Your emotions depend on your partner's mood
If your mood depends on how happy or sad your partner is, this is a sign of being fixated on the relationship. Even when you're in love with someone, you can't forget that your feelings and his feelings don't have to be the same.
For example, your partner came home happy because he had a great day. On the contrary, your day is not going well, but you force yourself to smile and pretend that everything is fine. Or when he is sad and you feel depressed for no particular reason.
All your resources go towards relationships.
When you constantly analyze your relationships, you spend a lot of effort and energy on it. Also, emotional dependence on your mood and what happens between you and your partner can cause you unnecessary pain, anxiety and negativity.
Please note that financial resources may also suffer. Often we try too hard to invest financially in relationships - we give our partner gifts that we can hardly afford, and when living together we pay for household needs alone.
You stopped doing what you used to enjoy
Your obsession with relationships can become destructive when you give up what you love. For example, you give up going to the fitness center, which was useful and brought you joy, in order to spend more evenings with your partner. Or instead of reading, which brought you pleasure, you play video games with him, although you don’t really like it.
In a healthy relationship, there is personal space and compromise between partners about how time should be spent.
Clarissa Silva, a behavioral scientist and relationship coach, warns that if you start to “agree with your partner's needs most of the time” or “define what you want based on someone else in order to please them,” it may negatively affect your life. Your partner's needs can crowd out your true desires, goals and lifestyle.
Liferepublic.ru - Seducing girls
If you approach a girl and you realize that you are not particularly attracted to her, or during a conversation you realize that you are not interested in her at all, just END THE CONVERSATION . It's really that simple. You look into her eyes and say: “It was fun, see you!” and you leave.
Simple right?
There’s no problem in picking up and leaving, but you stay, it’s kind of awkward for you to just pick up and leave, and you become a hostage to the situation. The problem is this. You really are not interested in some girls, but you will continue to date her, simply because you have become a hostage to the situation. This is a disaster for your ego.
I DON'T LIKE EVERYTHING!
You're dating a girl you don't even like. And you know it. She seems to look good, but you still don't like her. You are with her because you have some kind of problem in your head, you simply became a hostage to your own head. And you just can't get rid of it.
AND WHAT DOES THIS TURN INTO?
Do you think this won't bother you in any way? Do you think everything is okay? This will put pressure on every point of your male self. Everything you do. Every time you meet. Your inner voice will scream: “I AGREED TO LESS!”
Okay, you meet her for a certain time. Everything seems to be fine. It's certainly not what you want, but it's better than being alone, right?
SPIRAL DOWN
Your comfort zone is killing you. Hey, why not get out of it and meet someone else? But you are already a hostage to the situation. Hostage to your own head. You feel comfortable. Why not go to the gym and lose those extra pounds? To hell with it. You're already comfortable.
Yes, really, why do double work? What will you get for this? Promotion? Who cares? You feel good. The whole state of things suits you completely. Do you know who you are? You're the guy who's going down. What's next? You already know, because half of those who are reading this now have already encountered this. Everything is going down.
LET'S THINK ABOUT ALTERNATIVES
Look, I'd really rather leave myself alone for a while than date or live with a girl who basically doesn't interest me at all. Well, it just makes you feel like crap. Or I would just learn how to break up with a girl beautifully.
This completely kills my motivation to meet other girls. I'm humiliating myself. Why are you doing this to yourself? Why are you humiliating yourself? Do you allow someone to dominate you? Why do you force yourself into some kind of framework?
Look, I don't mean casual sex with less-than-attractive girls. We all get excited. But if this happens, move on! Look for the one who will make you feel like a real man. Surely you can guess where you can meet a girl. One that will make you laugh, cry, and generally live. That's what we're talking about.
LIFE
Don't marry a chubby woman in her 30s who gives you a blowjob just because you're too fat to have sex with her properly. Never get hung up! Go further! This will be your starting point. If you succeed, she will send you to a happy life.
Ask me a question or write your opinion about this article in the comments below. This motivates me to write new articles and it may be useful to you. I will not leave any comment unattended.
You need as much confirmation of his feelings as possible.
When you become too focused on the relationship and constantly replay in your head all the little details that happen between you and your partner, you can become more anxious. Even the smallest changes in your partner's behavior can make you feel like your relationship isn't the same as it used to be. Therefore, you need more and more confirmation that he loves you. You may be offended if he forgot to tell you before bed that he loves you, or didn’t compliment your new hairstyle.
Unfortunately, such grievances only harm the relationship that you want to “bring to the ideal.” Therefore, you should not be overly focused on evidence of your partner’s feelings.
How to fill life without your beloved man?
The next step will be practical activities aimed at changing lifestyle or habits. How not to get hung up on a man if all your attention is focused only on him for a long time? These thoughts can be crowded out by specific regular activities, work, hobbies, hobbies, and spending leisure time with the same friends. During this period, you cannot stay in a confined space without any distracting ways to spend your time. If such classes have never happened before, this is a great reason to start them. A busy life with all its worries and tasks will help take attention away from your lover.
Do you want to be in touch 24/7
You want to be with your partner always, even when you are physically far away. You worry that he doesn't respond to dozens of your messages during work hours or refuses to talk on the phone because he's busy. It worries you and makes you replay unpleasant scenarios in your head. Because of this, people who are too fixated on relationships often have problems with jealousy, which is difficult to control, and which in turn does not strengthen the relationship. This is why it is so important to have personal space in a relationship. Taking a break from each other from time to time, we allow ourselves to get bored and make the meeting more desirable.
Is it worth starting a new relationship?
“They knock out a wedge with a wedge,” friends often call a woman in a state of grief to this folk wisdom. Ladies mistakenly believe that after a failed relationship it is necessary to immediately start a new one in order to get rid of mental torment.
Additional Information! “Rebound” is what Western psychologists call a substitutionary novel, which is translated from English. language means “return”, “rollback” or “restoration”.
The paradox of this “way out” of the situation is that such a connection has nothing in common with a mature relationship.
New acquaintance
Entering into a new romantic adventure does not allow you to deal with old grievances and experiences. Until a woman consciously crosses out her former love, analyzes all her mistakes and understands what she really wants from her partner, all unresolved problems will “transition” into a rebound union.
