Who are bad people and how to identify them?
A negative person is usually unkind to others, he commits harmful and even immoral acts, and he is arrogant. Such people are found everywhere: on the street, at work, at school, in church. There are unpleasant rumors about bad people, and people around them try to be more careful with them. Most often, when we meet such a person, we immediately recognize his essence and, if possible, try to stay away. Let's list the qualities that bad people have:
- Greed. These people help others only for their own benefit. Without a reward, they won't lift a finger.
- Deceit. Very often, such people like to lie during a conversation, while trying to embellish themselves. A lie can be either harmless or have significant consequences for you.
- Conflict. These people provoke squabbles, and because of them there is a constantly tense atmosphere in the team.
- Irresponsibility. Such people are not able to take responsibility for their actions.
- Cruelty. They often show aggression towards others.
- Tendency to manipulate. They use the people around them to achieve their goals.
- Pleasure from the suffering of others. These people are not inclined to compassion; on the contrary, they gloat over other people's troubles.
Boasts
Mentioning your talents and merits is only appropriate during an interview. In all other cases, this is nothing more than posturing or banal boasting, which is usually supported not by real facts from the biography, but by seething imagination and the desire to wishful thinking.
Therefore, if someone suddenly starts praising themselves and expects you to start singing along with them, try to stay away from such a person.
Typically, such persons try to do everything to lower the self-esteem of their interlocutor below a critical level in order to look more advantageous against his background.
Are you a good person
First of all, you need to remember that all people are multifaceted. To the people around you, you can be both a bad and a good person. There are three ways you can measure how other people perceive you:
- Think about how you behave around strangers. Do you thank the store clerk for your purchase? Do you say hello to your neighbors? Do you give directions to random passers-by? Being friendly towards others creates the first impression of you as a person. If you are impolite to people around you, behave arrogantly and ill-mannered, others may consider you a bad person.
- How you behave with friends and family. The main traits of a good person in relation to others: sociability, responsiveness, selflessness. If you treat those around you as a consumer, you should think about your behavior.
- How do you behave with those closest to you? If you are capable of causing mental or physical pain even to those closest and dearest to you, you definitely cannot consider yourself a good person.
Negative peculiarity
It is necessary to make a reservation that uniqueness does not always manifest itself in a positive way. Quite often there are individuals who turn out to be peculiar in the negative meaning of this word.
How to understand whether a person is good or bad? Very simple. A bad person causes harm to those who do not deserve it, and for no reason. Often just for fun or for fun.
Also, a bad person is emotionally indifferent to other people's troubles. Moreover, seeing grief that has affected someone else, he will deliberately demonstrate his inhumanity - he will gloat and aggravate the situation.
This is the uniqueness that would be better not to exist. And the term is too positive to describe such individuals. A person who considers cruelty, immorality, bloodthirstiness and vandalism to be something common to him is not like everyone else, to put it mildly. But he is not unique. He is a failure of the system, pus on the body of humanity, a destroyer of everything good and bright.
Why do people behave aggressively
First of all, you need to remember that the reasons that push a person to be negative towards you most often do not involve your personal guilt. Basically, three motives push bad people into aggression and manifestation of negativity:
- Envy. Often it is the feeling of envy that pushes a person to do nasty and ugly things. When a person sees that you have something he wants, he feels unfairly deprived. Naturally, he pours out all his disappointment on you. If you yourself are an envious person, you need to change your internal attitudes. Sometimes it takes a lot of effort to get the desired benefit. Nothing appears out of thin air. If you want to share something good from another person’s life, then be prepared to share everything bad that happened to him.
- Negativity and aggression can be transmitted down the chain. If a person is rude, anger and indignation accumulate inside him, which he later pours out on others. In essence, this is simply a defensive reaction designed to get rid of accumulated negativity. But still, in this case, you should control yourself and not take it out on others because of your own troubles.
- People who have achieved nothing try to increase their own self-esteem by humiliating other people. The life of a bad person is not happy. In this case, you need to find goals that you can move towards. Overcoming obstacle after obstacle will make you feel important without having to assert yourself at someone else's expense.
Makes you defensive
Even a child knows that the best defense is an attack. Some people have mastered the art of manipulation so masterfully that it will be difficult for you to immediately recognize them.
In this case, you need to listen to your feelings; if during a conversation with him you constantly feel the need to justify yourself, then know that this guy is just a dirty manipulator, playing on your sense of duty to please his own goals.
Remember, a person who forces you to always use defensive tactics in a conversation will, in one way or another, negatively influence your life.
Why do girls choose bad guys?
Most often, girls of the neurotic type enter into relationships with bad guys. Programming for such relationships occurs in childhood. Girls who enter into abusive relationships had difficult relationships with their fathers as children. Dads spent little time on them, forgot about their birthday, and punished them, including using force. Having matured, girls in relationships look for the same attitude. They are not attracted to good, kind boys, because with them it is impossible to feel the fullness of feelings that their fathers taught them in childhood.
If a guy doesn’t answer calls, ignores him, treats him coldly and condescendingly, this only attracts a girl to him even more. She is used to looking for a problem in herself, and not in her partner. If a partner begins to raise his hand against a woman and humiliate her, she is looking for excuses for her man. Sometimes she finds the strength to leave a relationship after her partner crosses the line and seriously injures her. But a little time passes after the breakup, and the woman again enters into a relationship with another aggressor, because she needs the intensity of feelings.
How to get out of an unhealthy relationship
Usually the aggressor shows his dark sides at the very beginning of the relationship. Here it is important to consider the negative traits of your partner in time and immediately break up with him. You should not connect your life with a person in the hope that he will change for your sake. The more you forgive and tolerate, the more your partner will allow himself.
But ending a relationship is not the end. Often, neurotic women, after ending a sick relationship, experience something similar to withdrawal. They lack the thrill of sensations, they can barely restrain themselves from going in search of a new aggressor partner. The withdrawal period must be endured. A month, two, three will pass, and the need for traumatic relationships will decrease. When withdrawal passes, a woman will be able to take a more reasonable approach to choosing a partner.
It must be remembered that the need for a destructive partner is not a manifestation of love, but an excess of a traumatized psyche. Sometimes a woman is not able to cope with this problem herself, and then she needs the help of a specialist.
Lying about trifles
This person may not be lying to confuse you. He may not have any ill intentions against you, but he lies about little things and it is very noticeable.
He tells fables that a person with extreme mental retardation can believe, embellishes reality, “plays” with facts and dates from his biography as he pleases.
Why is he doing this? Most likely, just out of habit. And most importantly, he himself does not even notice that he is a generator of continuous lies, which has become an integral part of his conscious life.
Beware of such people, because they are inexhaustible sources of negative energy.
How to forgive for harm caused
Bad people can sometimes cause such trauma that it can take a long time to recover. We list the main methods that will help you come to your senses and let go of the offense:
- Any experience, even a negative one, is a life lesson that must be accepted with gratitude. The main thing is not to step on the same rake in the future.
- It is worth objectively assessing the share of your participation in a negative situation. Perhaps you yourself did something wrong, and you shouldn’t place all the blame on your opponent.
- Try to let go of the grudge, even if it is not easy.
- If you have received an apology, do not refuse it. Perhaps your offender really regrets what he did, which means there is no point in being angry with him anymore.
- Don't dwell on the past, because there are many happy and joyful moments ahead.
- Give kindness and love to the people around you, and then you will feel inner satisfaction from your actions.
Thus, we often meet bad people in our environment. Sometimes we ourselves may not appear in the best light for others. Although it seems that people have become worse lately, this is not true. At all times, people have done good and bad deeds. To protect yourself, it is important to recognize in time a person who wishes you harm. And if a bad person has left an unpleasant mark on your life, you need to be able to let go of the offense and, having drawn conclusions, move on.
Constantly complaining
Some of the most energetically “heaviest” people are eternal whiners. Yes, life is difficult and sometimes each of us needs someone to sympathize with us.
But when this turns into a lifestyle, the person becomes simply unbearable for those around him, and his complaints about life begin to cause not pity, but irritation.
Of course, the position of the eternal victim is quite convenient, because it helps to put pressure on impressionable people and thus manipulate them. But if you become one of those whose close circle includes people with a similar psychology, you will very soon notice that you have become the same professional pessimist.
Therefore, if someone starts communicating with you with a series of complaints, think about whether you need to see this person in your inner circle. After all, his endless dissatisfaction with reality can negatively affect your life.