Signs of Internet addiction
The main sign of Internet addiction is that the Internet becomes a source of emotions. “Normally, a person receives stimuli that evoke emotions in interaction with real living people, and uses the Internet as a technical means of communication: for exchanging messages, searching for information, including operational information,”
explains the psychologist.
Signs of Internet addiction also include:
• a subjective feeling of craving for the Internet.
Anyone who is free from Internet addiction acts according to the following scheme: “there is an information request - open the necessary resource - receive the necessary information - close it.” The victim of addiction has an inner urge to open, look, read, and the process itself is addictive.
• virtual communication exceeds real one.
A person with an addiction communicates mainly on the Internet. Let’s say he chats with virtual interlocutors for at least an hour every day and, in total, only talks with real people for an hour and a half a week.
• significant time spent on the Internet, not related to work and searching for truly necessary information.
Having received an answer to a pressing question (weather forecasts for the coming days), a person continues to hang out on the Internet, absorbing absolutely useless information (scandals in show business).
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Literature:
- Internet addiction / Grebenshchikova V. L. / 2010 / Psychology and pedagogy: methods and problems of practical application.
- Internet addiction is one of the pressing problems of our time / Olga Valentinovna Zavalishina, Nina Aleksandrovna Zagumennykh, Elena Stanislavovna Postoeva / 2015 / Polythematic network electronic scientific journal of the Kuban State Agrarian University.
- Internet addiction in the Russian-speaking sector of the Internet / Korolenko T. P., Loskutova V. A. / 2004 / Siberian Scientific Medical Journal
Causes of Internet addiction
Internet addiction develops among those who cannot satisfy important psychological needs in the real world.
According to the psychologist, people go to the Internet mainly for: • communication
(chat on social networks, dating sites);
• self-affirmation
(multiplayer games);
• self-expression
(keeping a blog “about nothing”, posting mediocre quality photos on your account, etc.).
On the Internet you can pretend to be anyone, but in real communication a person shows himself as he is. “If you are insecure, narrow-minded and uninteresting, childish and pretentious, all this will come to light. And on the Internet, it’s easy to hide your shortcomings and dark sides – if not completely, then to a large extent. Nobody sees the real person. Such communication does not satisfy because it does not provide full recognition,”
– says Alexey Tukmakov.
Self-affirmation on the Internet is also a bad idea. In the real world, asserting yourself comes with challenges. For example, I went to the boxing section and got hit in the face with a glove and was knocked out. Unpleasant. You’re thinking about conquering Everest, but you could break your arms and legs, or even die. And on the Internet you conquer galaxies like you’re gnawing on seeds, you deal with virtual enemies with the help of virtual weapons - and you feel cool. Without effort, difficulty and risk.
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In the real world, success in self-expression requires a lot of effort. “To paint a picture, write a book, implement a social project, you have to try. Invent, do something really valuable, show results. And it’s not a fact that you will receive recognition. What about the Internet? I posted the photo on Instagram, got likes, and was happy. Only this photo has no value, your friends will forget it as soon as they like it (because you like their posts). Likes mean nothing and give no real satisfaction. They cannot be compared, for example, with the applause that a soloist hears after performing on stage,”
- says the psychologist.
Structural personality changes
The stage of desocialization, when a teenager completely drops out of public life. This stage is characterized by indifference to one’s appearance, the ability to go for a long time without food or sleep, despite feeling unwell.
A dependent person becomes indifferent to the outside world; nothing pleases or interests him. If others try to talk or distract him, he reacts aggressively. Such severe computer addiction among teenagers is rare, but when the situation is so advanced, urgent help is needed.
What is the disadvantage of virtual communication?
Many fans of virtual communication say: “There are no interesting people around me, but the Internet is full of them. I read their posts, leave comments, get acquainted with other people’s opinions and express my own, receive feedback and support from those with whom I will never cross paths in real life. In short, I gain my mind and clear my soul. What harm?! One continuous benefit!
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Psychologist Alexey Tukmakov points out the weaknesses of this position: “Internet communication is a fiction, it is impossible to get enough of it. When people communicate directly, they smell each other. For the brain, it is smell that is a signal and indicator that communication is real. Reality smells, but the picture (on a monitor, TV, or in a movie theater) does not. A person can “communicate” on the Internet for dozens of hours, but still will not feel full, because there is no smell. And when a person actually meets his interlocutor and spends a couple of hours talking, this communication will be enough for him for a week.”
At the same time, the expert draws attention to the fact that supporters of Internet communication usually firmly defend their point of view: “If a person tells himself that he is “interested” and “takes his mind off”, he will continue to do this. There is no need for him to try other options. An alcoholic relaxes with the help of alcohol and does not look for other methods. It’s the same with virtual communication: if a person wants to surf the Internet, well, let him sit, this is his life and his destiny.”
Have you come to the conclusion that there is too much virtual communication in your life? Then, at least for a month, give up the Internet and interact with people in physical reality. “Meet the same online acquaintances if you live in the same city. Communicate a couple of times a week for one and a half to two hours - and you will certainly feel that real communication is satiating. But online communication will lose its attractiveness by ninety percent,”
– says Alexey Tukmakov.
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Tolstoy's test
In his essay, Roger Ebert writes that he was determined to force himself to read what his brain demanded, what he needed. He prescribed himself a healthy literary diet (and found a room in the house where there was no Internet access) and “felt that peace had reigned in my soul. The vanity and haste have disappeared.” “I stopped twitching,” he admits. — I stopped reading the news, stopped flipping through the pages of the Internet and responding to tweets. I read... I guess I managed to reconfigure my brain, return it to the old rut.”
I thought that I could do the same and perhaps I could, as Seneca said, “strengthen my brain with ardent and incessant care.” I made a list of responsibilities (professional and personal) and began to strictly adhere to it, without going to extremes. With this approach, moments of distraction from reality appeared again, and I could use them at any time at my own discretion. I took War and Peace off the shelf again. The novel lies next to the computer. While I am writing these lines, he is looking at me reproachfully, like a puppy starved for affection. I open and close the book. Some kind of black veil envelops me. It's hard for me to do this. Why is it so hard for me?
At first it was not just difficult. It was real torture. I tried to delve into the book, re-reading sentences and paragraphs several times. Every couple of pages I would get distracted and look at my email, and then dive down the rabbit hole again. I do not want to diminish the merits of the book, I only emphasize the moral instability of modern readers. Reading is not helped at all by the fact that the world has actively moved away from such activities. In the eyes of many, you look too elitist. Indeed, “War and Peace” has one thousand three hundred pages, and the novel weighs no less than a well-fed cat. Each of his thirty-four characters appears under three or four different (Russian) names. The aristocrats featured in the novel speak almost exclusively French, which seems strange, since it was at that time that they were fighting Napoleon. In my edition, the French passages were translated in small print in footnotes, as if the translators (Piver and Volokhonskaya) wanted to say: “Did you really want us to translate this for you as well?” In addition, at the end of the book there are a lot of notes where the meanings of obscure jokes and sayings are explained. Therefore, I often had to look at the last pages and fold back the corners of the first ones so as not to lose the part that I was reading. It is clear that the novel is the product of a culture that had far fewer YouTube videos than ours.
Consequences of Internet addiction
“A person with Internet addiction, figuratively speaking, moves from physical reality to an illusory virtual world.
Into a world that does not exist, which exists only in the imagination. As a result, a person interacts not with physical reality (other people, nature, live musical sound or a picture), but with an information machine (computer or smartphone), which, in essence, controls his perception and feelings,” explains Alexey Tukmakov.
The spread of Internet addiction contributes to the separation of people, the so-called. atomization. Energy that could be used for socially useful purposes is wasted. For example, in the city there is an old park, beautiful, but abandoned. There are no budgetary funds allocated for it. People can organize and put the park in order on their own. Anyone who has a hand in improving the park will be warmed by the feeling that he is involved in a good cause. Another example is volunteering. When a person helps those in need, he feels stronger and more important. And if instead he plays computer tanks, then he will waste his time and energy in vain.
Thus, Internet addiction negatively affects both the individual and society as a whole. “People suffer from loneliness. Some people drink themselves to death, others commit suicide. The energy of a mass of Internet-addicted individuals is spent on achieving fictitious virtual goals. Of course, society loses from this,”
- says the expert.
And he adds: “However, from the point of view of social control, Internet addiction is good because a person who is immersed in the virtual world does not create any problems in physical reality.”
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Between “healthy” and “tasty”
The virtual world cannot simply be abandoned. You can quit smoking, but you can't quit eating. Consuming digital content is like eating. We have to eat. We need to find some balance between the conventional “tasty” and “healthy”. For example, on one side you have raw vegetables, lean protein, eggs and tuna, quinoa and lentils. On the other hand, there are chili potatoes, popcorn, cakes, dark chocolate and alcohol.
You probably can't eat French fries every day and maintain optimal health. You may be able to afford it sometimes if you've been eating well and exercising. Of course, life with red wine, chocolate and a piece of cake is more fun than life without them. But balance is more important here.
Likewise, there are work emails and YouTube videos on proper leaf raking techniques. For entertainment, I have, for example, videos with cats, reading nasty tweets and porn.
Your goal is to find a middle ground between usefulness and entertainment. But how to do that? 9 rules helped me, which I will tell you about right now. So…
How to avoid the negative influence of the Internet
There is absolutely no need to cross out the Internet from your life - it has many useful opportunities.
It’s just important to know how not to succumb to negative influences and avoid the dangers of modern technologies. According to Alexey Tukmakov, for this two conditions must be met: • “First, provide yourself with reasons to experience physical reality: get involved in living art (attend concerts, museums, theaters), engage in creativity (paint, play music), devote time sports, find a real cause that feels important (for some this is regular volunteering), enjoy interesting communication with people and contact with nature.
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• Secondly, use the Internet only when you cannot do without it (e-mail, current weather information, booking tickets and hotels). You can find out news from paper newspapers, write out two - pro-government and opposition, read and compare. Listen to your favorite music without going to social networks - download it to your computer and smartphone. In a word, if there is a fear of becoming addicted, there is only one principle – use less internet.”
Clinical personality changes
The teenager is looking for an opportunity to play or go on social networks as often as possible, and does not know how to relax and rest in any other way. There is almost no interest in other entertainment, or they clearly lose out in his system of priorities.
This could include skipping school, lying to parents and teachers, and spending all your pocket money on paid options in the game. To help a teenager get rid of computer addiction at this stage, decisive measures are needed - psychological and pedagogical suggestions alone will not be enough. Parents need to create a worthy competitor to the Internet. For example, play sports together or go on a long hiking trip.
How to overcome internet addiction
Psychologist Alexey Tukmakov claims that to overcome Internet addiction it is important to follow the following recommendations:
1. Completely give up the Internet for 3-6 weeks.
“The first step is the “tie.”
It’s like with alcohol and nicotine - you need to completely stop doing what causes addiction: drinking, smoking, using the Internet,” explains the specialist.
According to some data, a stable habit is formed in 21 days, according to others – in 42 days. “Weaning off” takes the same amount of time – from 3 to 6 weeks. If possible, take a vacation during this period so that you do not need to use the Internet for work. For calls, purchase a push-button telephone.
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2. Provide reasons for experiences in physical reality
(see paragraph “How to enjoy the benefits of the Internet and avoid negative influences”).
“This is the key point,
” says the psychologist.
– If you ignore it, the person will definitely return to Internet addiction.
He is used to satisfying important needs using the Internet and, if he does not find other ways, he will experience severe discomfort – frustration.” 3. Find secondary benefits from using the Internet.
Secondary benefit is some kind of implicit (not realized by a person), but significant need. The habit that allows you to satisfy it becomes extremely stable. It is difficult to identify secondary benefits on your own; it is advisable to contact a specialist. It will help you realize these benefits and teach you how to satisfy psychological needs in adequate ways.
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“For clarity, I’ll give an example from another area: smoking. It seems that a smoking person satisfies the need for nicotine to which his body is accustomed, right? However, at the same time, smoking is a reason for socializing in the smoking room, helps regulate emotions, and makes you feel like an adult (relevant for teenagers). If these three needs are not realized by the smoker, then they are secondary benefits for him. And contribute to maintaining the smoking habit. To get rid of it, you first need to learn how to satisfy these needs in other ways. Then quit smoking - the physiological dependence on nicotine will go away in about a month. Since other needs are satisfied, the person will be able to live without cigarettes.”
– says Alexey Tukmakov.
Regarding Internet addiction, the primary benefits, as noted above, are communication, self-affirmation, and self-expression. A person can be aware of these moments.
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Secondary Benefits of Internet Addiction
most often the following:
• the Internet provides incentives for experiences (i.e. the Internet is a source of emotions);
• you can avoid the efforts that self-affirmation and self-expression in reality require;• you can hide your real self by creating a virtual identity (relevant for insecure people without hobbies and interests);
• you can avoid contact with real people (relevant for those who are afraid of people).
After realizing the secondary benefits, it is easy to understand what is required to develop them:
• create incentives for experiences in real life (art, nature, sports);
• get used to the effort of simply doing something in reality;• discover your interests, get carried away with something (any person who has finished school is familiar with many areas of science, art, creativity - something is sure to evoke a response);
• communicate with real people, eliminating your fear of them.
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What not to do
- Fight with physical methods - turn off the Internet and force the child to take a walk or read. It doesn't work, new interests don't just arise.
- Focus on the negative and scare the player with health consequences. As a rule, children do not attach due importance to this - they realize the harm to health much later.
- It is harsh to point out the disease - call him a gambler, abnormal, say “you will be cured.” This can have the opposite effect and only push the child away from going to a psychologist or psychotherapist.
- Forcibly take the child to a specialist. Sometimes this is justified, but dependence on a computer is not the case. If a teenager refuses help, it is better to go to a consultation with the parents themselves, so that the psychologist can suggest a way out of the situation.
- Criticize friends online. Even if they really have a bad influence on the child, he will not accept criticism, and as a result, parents only risk ruining the relationship.
- Fence yourself off from the situation and wait for the problem to resolve itself. Treatment of computer addiction requires the active participation of parents and patience, otherwise you can waste time and reach the stage where even the help of a specialist is not always effective.
The computer, like everything in this world, is not an absolute evil, but a tool. It can be useful for a child if parents teach him how to use it correctly.
How to help another person get rid of Internet addiction
All you can do is try to awaken a loved one’s interest in something other than the Internet, and actively help with this. For example, get them interested in sports - running together in the morning, hiking, something else. “Please note: do it together, and not just give the instruction: “Quit the Internet and run in the morning.”
It is important for a dependent person to feel supported, to feel that someone really needs him and that he is given time and attention,” the psychologist emphasizes.
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Another option is to help a person get involved in an exciting process. “Do you know that he’s thinking about taking up painting? Give him a subscription to a painting course for two months. But precisely for the course where there will be real communication with passionate people who may have an influence on him. Just handing over a cool set of expensive paints is a bad idea. He will put them on the shelf and go back to the Internet. To overcome addiction, live contact with living people is important,”
– emphasizes Alexey Tukmakov.
If your efforts get you nowhere, leave the person alone. It is impossible to free someone from addiction who does not want it themselves. Even if you want to, you cannot cure an alcoholic by force; it’s the same story with Internet addiction. Except that it’s less dangerous: it doesn’t make your liver fall off. It will be possible to help only if the initial impulse arose in the dependent person himself. And attempts to stop addictive behavior are pointless: a person will return to it as soon as external restrictions no longer hold him back. Therefore, let your loved one live as he wants. And you go about your life.
Scientists' opinion
Douglas Gentil, a professor I know at the University of Iowa, responded to my complaints about distraction by saying, “The same thing is happening to me. When I'm trying to write an article, I can't stop myself from checking my email every five minutes. I do this, although I understand how it interferes with my work.” This is a particular nuisance for Gentil, since he is one of the world's leading experts on the influence of media on fragile young brains. The professor's strong point is attention deficit. "I know! I know the results of all studies on multi-objective problems. I can tell you that everyone who shouts about their ability to multitask is wrong. We know that in fact, those who think of themselves as Caesar are the worst at multi-tasking.”
The brain, contrary to common misconception, is unsuitable for simultaneously solving several problems. This is where many of our problems are rooted. We are indeed capable of parallel information processing, for example to combine visual and auditory data to obtain an adequate understanding of the world around us. But attention itself is a point that highlights only one thing at any given moment. Thus, solving multiple problems simultaneously is a fundamentally flawed concept. There is a quick switch from one small task to another. This is the performance of many tasks with instant application and weakening of efforts, but the simultaneous solution of a multi-purpose task, alas, is impossible.
The brain, contrary to common misconception, is unsuitable for simultaneously solving several problems
You can hardly blame yourself for being fascinated by the possibilities that solving multi-purpose problems provides. The sharp narrowing of the field of view required, say, to read War and Peace is very unnatural, while the stupid jumping around the pages of the Internet has a kind of primal appeal. This happens because the computer - like the television before it - affects the most basic function of the brain, called the orienting response. This response served our species well in the wild. If suddenly your peripheral vision detects a darkening on the left, you should definitely look there, because it may turn out to be the shadow of some creature that wants to eat you.
Having grown up in a world full of dangerous surprises, we are programmed by nature to notice rapid changes. The indicative reaction is a constant alarm signal from the brain, and cannot be ignored. It is for this reason that a lecture given online (for example, within the TED community) is more engaging than if it were listened to while sitting in a classroom. In the lecture hall you have to concentrate and maintain your attention with all your might.
What are the advantages of a person free from Internet addiction?
“By and large, there is one advantage.
Such a person lives in reality and real opportunities open up before him. For example, make money, meet a loved one, implement a creative project, strengthen your body. You can’t do any of this on the Internet,” says Alexey Tukmakov.
For an addicted person, the Internet is a prison into which he voluntarily imprisoned himself. And the advantage of someone who does not suffer from Internet addiction is the same as that of a person who is not in prison. He's just free.
Advice from a consultant
Peter Bregman runs a consulting firm that teaches CEOs how to harness the full potential of their employees. In addition, he is the author of the book “18 Minutes. How to Increase Concentration, Stop Distractions, and Get Things Done That Really Matter,” which contains valuable advice: take a minute out of every hour of working time, as well as five minutes at the beginning and end of the working day, during which you only need to think about your intentions . Bregman says he specifically set his watch to beep every hour as a reminder that it's time to adjust course.
In addition to advising me to step away from tasks and reflect on intentions, Bregman suggested that I limit my email viewing to three times a day, especially if work is not moving. “The worst thing is to rush back and forth,” Bregman said, echoing what scientists have said about multi-objective problems. “Besides, email is one of the most ineffective methods of communication. Regarding the simultaneous solution of many problems, I can only repeat that this is impossible. You're just distracted."
“I always feel like I’m missing the most important thing,” I admitted. “It is because of this fear that we waste several hours every day.” Fear is the best word to describe my emotional state. It's the constant worry that I must be doing something else (or that my life is going somewhere wrong). Bregman argues that people who can anticipate fear are the most successful in the business he (Bregman) has spent his life advising on.
