The stronger sex prefers to keep their emotions under control, not showing them even when it comes to love. Sometimes this behavior makes girls doubt and draw the wrong conclusions, which leads to mistakes and disappointment. This article will discuss the concept of how a man truly loves, how he behaves, and psychology.
How a man loves
Psychology of male feelings and attachments
The psychology of boys and girls are two concepts that cannot be woven together. To understand the male gender, you need to understand in detail how men love, what priorities they set for themselves and what they need.
Men like romantic adventures that add variety to life, and emotional warmth. When you ask a guy what qualities attract him in a woman, he can cheat 90%. If you hear from your partner that he is attracted to your inner world, intelligence or economics, do not believe him. Male psychology forces you to initially pay attention to appearance, and only after that look deeper, studying behavior and attitude.
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A loving man will put his chosen one first, devote more time to her, take care of her, and give her gifts. If a young man says that his wife should be a good lover, then he is not looking for a permanent relationship.
Remembers you throughout the day
Happy couples constantly communicate physically and emotionally, always in touch. If the marriage is strong, the partner takes time every day to show love and care. This could be funny emoticons or a call asking how you are feeling. To feel affection, a two-minute conversation on the phone is enough for a couple. The psychology of a man in love is such that if he is not around, he will remind you of himself in any way possible.
He hides his feelings
When a man sincerely loves his woman, he wants to satisfy not only her psychological needs. Financial security for the family is what every person strives for.
The psychology of men is different from that of women: if he truly loves, this can be seen in the way he behaves with his chosen one. Caring is manifested in a good attitude, financial support, gifts, flowers. Sometimes guys hide their feelings due to uncertainty about the future, but show them through good attitude and behavior.
Not everyone knows how to understand whether a man loves you or whether this is just another respectful attitude, unjustified concern. A loving husband can be recognized by his eyes, because they will not allow you to hide your feelings.
Let's look at the reasons why men who love do not want to show their feelings:
- unstable financial situation;
- fear of serious relationships;
- diffidence;
- lack of confidence in your partner;
- childhood psychological trauma;
- fear of love and affection.
The psychology of each guy is individual, if some can easily talk about feelings, invite girls on dates, spend time with them, then others will wait for the woman they need.
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Guys also know how to get upset and worry about actions and behavior. But the problem is that only a few can show feelings or experiences. This distinguishes the male part of the population from the female part.
Men may hide their feelings when they are not confident that they will provide for a woman, give her a future, have children and provide everything she needs. Fear suppresses emotions, forcing you to hide everything that has accumulated over time. Not everyone knows how to determine whether a man loves or how serious his feelings are. It takes time to figure it out; give your partner the first opportunity to understand that you need to talk about feelings without waiting for your financial situation to improve.
Gives in in an argument
The best way to prove your love is to let someone win a bet. It is more important for a loving husband to keep the peace than to be right. Prolonged misunderstandings or hurt feelings often lead to discord.
A loving person will raise a white flag, take the first step after a quarrel, even if he was right, and make concessions for the sake of family happiness.
This means that a man is not indifferent to how his beloved feels and puts her interests above his own. Next time, the spouse should think about what is more important: to prove she is right or to avoid problems.
What if a man uses
Wanting a serious relationship, women become naive and fall headlong into love to fill the void. Not everyone knows how to understand in such a situation whether a man loves you or is just having a good time for pleasure.
You need to be able to recognize gigolos and those who only need sexual intimacy for a certain time. If your partner is interested in sex and does not have serious feelings, then he will spend time with you only in the evenings, invite you to a hotel or home, and appear less in public places.
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There are people who are constantly looking for a new victim to spend the evening and satisfy their sexual fantasies. In such a situation, how to find out whether a man loves you or just needs your body is quite simple. If during intimacy he shows tenderness, care, puts your desires in the foreground, and after intimacy immediately runs away, then he does not love.
There are categories of people who agree to relationships only for material gain; they are called gigolos. Many people don’t know how to understand that a guy loves you and he needs you, not money. Here you should only look at your partner’s behavior, his attitude towards material wealth and towards you.
Looks into the eyes
A serious sign is that during dinner the spouse does not talk on the phone or look around. All attention is directed to the wife. It is important for a man to constantly see her and listen with interest. According to research by psychologist Zeke Rubin, 75% of couples in love look at each other. People just having a conversation do this in 30–60% of situations. Constant eye contact shows a man's love for a woman.
How to distinguish true feelings from easy relationships
Psychologists show how to understand that a man really loves you by paying attention to his actions and attitude; their opinion must be taken into account. Not all men can show real feelings, even if this is actually the case. Many people hide their relationship because of uncertainty; they cannot imagine how a girl will react to their words or actions. But easy relationships are also common; they make many people think about what they need to understand where the truth is and where there is deception when a guy says he loves him.
Actions
Signs that a man really loves must be looked for in his actions. All your partner’s actions will be directed only at you, they are manifested in attention, care, involvement, and a sense of obligation to you. If a partner says that he likes you, he is ready for a serious relationship, but at the same time does not give flowers, gifts, does not invite you to a restaurant for a meeting, such a man is insincere.
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Let's see what signs of attention a man shows if he loves a woman:
- shows attention with flowers and gifts;
- keeps his word;
- wants to see each other more often;
- tries to support and understand in everything;
- protects;
- solves your problems;
- does not limit anything.
Such actions by a partner suggest that his feelings are serious and there is no need to look for another catch in them.
Not all men are so sincere; some may do things for the sake of profit. In order not to find yourself in an unpleasant situation, try to quickly study the psychology and desires of your partner, and also make sure that his feelings are sincere and all actions are justified. But if you are a successful and influential woman, and he cannot boast of such achievements, think carefully before letting your chosen one into your life.
Nonverbal signs
Non-verbal speech does not show the exact truth when a man says he loves, but it can guide him in the right direction and consider a lot in his partner. If emotions and behavior can be hidden or allowed to play along in this regard, then in the case of non-verbal signs of love or sympathy, everything is much more complicated.
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Only body language can answer the question of how to understand whether a man loves or not, if he personally does not talk about his feelings. Let's consider the main signs that can confirm sympathy:
- watching the girl you like while in company;
- dilation of pupils upon eye contact;
- sincere smile;
- When speaking, your hands are near your waist and not crossed over your chest;
- the desire to touch the girl or hug her.
These are a few signs that a man may really love you or has sympathy, which doesn’t need to be talked about.
Talk
When communicating with a man for whom you feel sympathy, many are interested in how to find out what a guy likes, what to pay attention to in a conversation, what words he should say. It is not necessary to hear from him: “I love you,” “I want children from you,” “Let’s always be together.” These words can be spoken more insincerely, without fully realizing the seriousness of what is happening.
Most guys find it easier to show their feelings than to talk about them. From the conversation you can understand the real attitude towards yourself, so here it is worth paying attention to the manner of communication.
Psychologists advise when talking with a caring person to pay attention to the following points that indicate the presence of sympathy, infatuation or love:
- all conversations are sincere, without a mask;
- the man actively listens to stories about you;
- he does not translate the topic, even if it is of little interest to him;
- respect is always shown in the conversation, he does not interrupt the interlocutor;
- is interested in your life and hobbies, listens more;
- sincerely answers questions that are appropriate during the meeting.
Based on the conversation, you can draw many conclusions, find out about the seriousness of the interlocutor’s intentions, and answer many questions. The main thing is not to try to fully study your partner in several meetings; this will require more than one life.
Correspondence
Virtual communication is gaining popularity today, so it’s worth finding out how to understand that a guy loves you or feels sympathy for you by correspondence if you have not yet met in life.
The first sign of sympathy is the frequency of messages and the time spent on it. If a man cares about you, he will spend a long time with you, be interested in your life, and start conversations on any topic.
A guy in love will only use a pleasant manner of communication, emoticons, and send funny pictures to interest you. If you find it easy to communicate with a person by correspondence, then he quickly puts you at ease, communicates with you with interest, and he likes you. If on his part everything is less serious, and you continue virtual communication, then there are no feelings in his heart.
Rapid stage of relationship development
A serious young man will show all his attention to a girl, trying to win her heart as quickly as possible. We are not talking about sexual intimacy and intimate evenings, but just about creating a family or living together.
If a partner is not serious, he will not even talk about building a strong relationship, waking up together every day, and being responsible for his beloved.
A man who shows feelings can be seen with the naked eye. He tries to spend all his time with his beloved, and not just free evenings. Friends, work, hobbies - all this will gradually fade into the background, the guy will devote more time to you, look for common goals and interests. After a year of a strong and stable relationship, a confident man proposes to a woman. If a civil marriage drags on for a long time, without showing any changes after two or three years of marriage, such a partner is also not serious. He is simply satisfied with his current situation, constant care and stable sex life.
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How to understand that a man only needs intimacy
When starting a conversation, girls may ask themselves how to find out if a guy loves you or just dreams of being in your bed. If a man is interested in you, he will spend quite a lot of time with you in company, go for walks, ask you out on dates, invite you to restaurants. You can feel the warmth and positive attitude towards you only by communication.
If your partner is serious, he will never tell you on the first or second date that he wants to get closer. Only those who need exclusively sexual intercourse do this, and they don’t even think about the future.
If a man on the first date behaves openly arrogantly, tries to touch your knees or face, tightly squeezes your shoulders, be sure that after intimacy you will not see him again. There is no need to allow such an attitude towards yourself even if the desire is mutual. Wait a few dates: if after them you are confident in your partner’s sincerity, then you can move on to a more serious level of communication.
Influencing factors
This question, perhaps, should be approached from a psychological point of view. Love itself is a very complicated thing. Many people don’t even know how to explain this feeling and what it is expressed in. Sometimes it happens that a person does not even suspect that he is already in love. How can one understand and recognize how a loving man behaves?
But human behavior as a whole is influenced by many factors. If we talk about the behavior of a man in love, then the devil himself will break his leg. After all, this, first of all, depends on:
- education and character of a person;
- environment;
- IQ level;
- social status and much more.
For example, if a man is an introvert, then you definitely cannot expect fiery odes from him in his honor, a million red roses at the door or a serenade under the window at 3 o’clock in the morning. Or take a phlegmatic person, such a person will not destroy everything during passion or showdowns based on jealousy.
You can also compare a guy in love or a married neighbor. The first, in a state of falling in love, manifests itself in the form of a romantic who can shout about his love to the whole world. The second, on the contrary, will either suffer in silence or modestly hint at his feelings, fearing publicity.
But again, there are still some general signs of a man in love, by which a psychologist or simply an attentive person can understand about the true feelings that overwhelm a person.
Signs that a man needs you
Although men try to hide their feelings, sometimes they fail to do so. If you really want to, you can consider 10 signs and actions that show that a man loves you:
- Manifestation of jealousy.
- He is the first to make an appointment and comes to the date with flowers or a gift.
- Calls for no reason.
- Tries to learn as much as possible about your interests in order to understand in the future what to focus on when dating.
- Shows attention, talks with interest, does not interrupt.
- Takes care of himself.
- Wants to meet your friends and family. He also shows a desire to introduce you to his social circle.
- Doesn't hide his phone, answers calls without leaving your side.
- He always tries to please you with something, gives you your favorite flowers, invites you to your favorite restaurant.
- Listens to the words.
These are the main signs that answer the question of how to understand that he loves you and has a desire to continue dating in the future.
If all this is absent in communication, a man is selfish, puts only his own interests first, then there is no point in talking about the seriousness of his feelings. The relationship will not go beyond temporary meetings.
Circle of Trust6
A man in love completely trusts his woman. He entrusts his deepest secrets to her, confident that she will never betray him. If he is a thief, he may even take her with him on business, as long as she is safe.
He also listens very carefully to his woman. Even if he is not at all interested and does not need to know what kind of husband his neighbor has, he will still be your most ideal listener.
His desire to make his girlfriend happy will justify any of her mistakes.
- She killed a man - she was probably tired, or he was rude to her.
- I didn’t clean the house - I probably had a headache.
- I burned down the office and lit a cigarette unsuccessfully.
- Dropped a nuclear bomb on the USA - they didn’t issue a green card, etc.
A loving man will find an approach to the hearts of his precious mother-in-law and five Caucasian brothers. To please them, he will carry out any instructions and requests. In turn, he will certainly introduce her to his friends and family as the one and only one in his life.
Pages on social networks will be filled with photos of you together, where there will definitely be captions with cute nicknames borrowed from our little brothers.
And of course dreams for the future. You will be in them everywhere, in his new home, the mother of his children and growing old together.
But all these are signs of the behavior of a man in love. But how a loving man behaves on a subconscious level will help you find out non-verbal signs.
How to test men's feelings
When a man is hidden and shy, it is very difficult to understand how to determine what he truly loves, and his relationship is not short-term.
Psychologists have prepared several test options that will help you understand this issue:
- Romantic impulses, dinner by candlelight, rose petals and more - girls really like it all. If a lover arranges such evenings from time to time, he loves and strives to do something pleasant.
- Supporting the girl’s initiative sincerely shows that he cares about her. Men, having no interest in their partner, will rarely follow her lead and live by her rules.
- A loving guy will always kiss a girl on the lips and not the cheek, no matter what atmosphere they are in.
- In the event of a cold or other illness, a man surrounds a woman with due attention, taking care of her twice as much as on ordinary days.
- If a man loves, he will do everything to make his woman happy, successful and cheerful.
All men are different, so their psychology is also different. Someone may show discomfort in communication in the presence of strangers, and only express all their feelings in a home environment. But this does not mean at all that your loved one does not take you seriously and is embarrassed not by his feelings, but by you.
Tries to surprise
When a man loves a woman, he looks for ways to refresh his feelings and diversify his everyday life. The husband is interested in what his wife likes, remembers the little things that make her smile.
The husband prepares meaningful gifts - what his beloved dreamed or wanted to have, guesses wishes, presents surprises.
We are not talking about expensive things, these could be:
- homemade breakfast or dinner;
- favorite candy or ice cream;
- flowers given for no reason;
- tickets to a film premiere.
A husband who loves a woman makes her dreams come true and helps her achieve what she wants. He realizes his wife's plans to start a business or fantasize about a trip to Paris.
Advice from psychologists
You should not judge men according to standard rules, because each person is individual and it is impossible to recognize everyone based on general psychology. Psychologists do not recommend thinking about whether he loves you or not. Confident girls will never ask such a question or look for this or that trick in relation to him.
When you doubt that your husband or boyfriend loves you, you should first understand yourself. If your partner shows a lot of attention, is constantly nearby, gives gifts, makes surprises, and you continue to doubt something, the matter is in your psychology. Unfortunately, women’s low self-esteem pushes them to such thoughts, forcing them to look for a catch in any action and search for a rival.
To increase self-esteem and not doubt a man’s love, you should:
- Take care of yourself.
- If necessary, visit a psychologist and determine the source of the decrease in self-esteem.
- Don’t show a man that you see something wrong.
- Be confident in your words and actions.
- Choose a social circle that will increase your self-confidence.
If there is a strong woman next to a man who is not afraid of losing him, then this will not happen. Remember that thoughts are material! When a person and his love are dear to you, think only about a bright future.
Doesn't get stuck in gadgets
To spend time with his other half, a loving man puts away his smartphone and laptop. Regardless of the importance of the work, the spouse knows when to put down the phone, turn off the computer and pay attention to the family. In this case, love is placed above career and friends; the choice will always be in favor of the woman. This does not mean that a man will quit at the first call, but time without tablets and iPhones, intended for two, speaks of deep affection.
