The psychology of online communication on social networks, on dating sites and other platforms is noteworthy in that it tells people about the pitfalls of such communication. There are two sides to it. The first is completely harmless and positive: there are many examples where communication on the Internet led people to create strong couples, close friendships and more. The second side is not so pleasant: attackers, criminals and even maniacs operate on the Internet.
Both adults and children can become their victims. You will learn from the article about the pros and cons of virtual connections and what are the optimal rules for communication and behavior online.
History of virtual networks
Many popular sites that are in demand today on the Internet, especially for communication, were once created by “pioneers” for work or to unite people of similar interests. A striking domestic example is the social network VKontakte. Pavel Durov, its creator, and his “colleagues” conceived the site as a tool that would provide an opportunity to communicate online for students of the higher educational institution where he studied to solve various educational problems. Today, only marketers, public relations specialists and other specialists conduct professional communication on the site: VKontakte has long become a means of communication and finding old and new acquaintances.
If we talk in general about all virtual networks, it should be emphasized: the first resources on the network were created exclusively for solving business problems, and not for publishing pictures with cats and communication. In this context, the ARFANET network, developed by the United States Department of Defense exclusively for military purposes, is worth considering. There was no talk about communication in it.
Rules for positioning in social networks
Image: Logo photo created by freepik – www.freepik.com
- Remember - it is impossible to hide information. Do not publish materials (photos, pictures, texts) that will compromise you.
- Any information can be used against us.
- Separate private and public.
- Re-reading posts through someone else's eyes is a useful exercise that will help you filter content before posting it publicly.
- First impressions are as important as digital footprints. It takes one and a half seconds to form a first impression of a person in life, but seven seconds to do it on social networks.
- Check carefully who you add as friends, in what photos you are tagged, check with the groups you join, write carefully information about yourself.
- Fact checking. Check what you post.
virtual communication
Communication on the Internet between two individuals or a group of people is a special type of communication, messages in chats, instant messengers, which are exchanged between people using computers and other gadgets (mobile devices and even so-called “smart” watches).
This is a type of communication characterized by the absence of physical contact between the parties to the dialogue or conversation. Even if we are talking about video communication, the use of microphones and other means: in the context of virtual communication, it is inappropriate to talk only about text messages. The development of technologies and means of communication provides the opportunity for any user with access to the global network and the simplest device that allows access to the Internet to communicate with other people. From anywhere in the world. Even if there are continents between them.
It has already been noted that despite the presence of a lot of advantages (exchange of knowledge, experience, the opportunity to find friends in other countries or even a soulmate), communication on the Internet is an area fraught with many pitfalls and even dangers. We'll talk about them in more detail later.
How do you feel about virtual communication?
Positively. I found (found) many new friends on the Internet.
22.22%
Okay, but I think there’s no need to get carried away.
48.15%
Neutral. Everyone communicates with whoever and where it is convenient.
14.81%
Negative. The Internet is evil. There is nothing there except garbage and propaganda and naked women.
14.81%
Voted: 27
Features of Internet communication
A feature of online communication is the nature of the roles and images assumed by the subjects of communications. For some, the Internet is an opportunity to be yourself, discuss any topic and not be afraid of judgement. It is often chosen by people who have problems with oral speech, are overly shy, or have other significant or insignificant deviations: the Internet does not allow their interlocutors to know about the presence of problems. These and other people can become successful bloggers, they make friends, relationships with whom even after revealing the truth do not deteriorate.
There is also a downside: some people use the Internet and all the possibilities of social networks, blogs or chats for personal gain. They are characterized by blatant lies presented as truth. An example is when an attacker hacks one person’s page, and then tries to “extort” money from friends or subscribers by hook or by crook, posing as the owner. Theft of personal data, dissemination of false information, creation of fake accounts, bullying - all this is a small part of the risks and threats characteristic of the Internet.
There is a special segment on the Internet that is accessible only to users who use special software to bypass blocks. A peculiarity of the segment is the presence in the results of unpopular search engines of sites, blogs, chats and other resources that Yandex and Google block. It is called the "Hidden Web" (also "Dark Web", "Black Network"). You can find and buy illegal weapons on this network; scammers from all over the world sell organs, drugs and conduct other illegal activities here. The fight against the “Hidden Network” is difficult due to the development of distributed data storage technologies.
We recommend installing only trusted software on computers and mobile devices and using reliable antivirus programs. This will guarantee your safety and the safety of your children from criminals who trade on the DarkNet.
We do not denigrate the Internet. We only recommend using proven means of accessing network resources. Take care of your own safety.
Advantages of virtual communication
There are many advantages to communicating online. This is a great way for people to:
Overcome geographical barriers. With the help of social networks and other platforms for virtual communication, you can easily find friends in other countries. On the Internet you can even try your luck by trying to find your soulmate. And for already established couples, this is an opportunity to communicate at a distance, exchange photos and voice messages;
Cope with complexes and fears, overcome shyness. A person who is shy and has complexes can use social networks and other means of virtual communication to work on himself. By communicating with strangers there, he can become flexible, develop a vocabulary, and become able to adapt to his interlocutor and adapt to different speech situations. The main thing is not to immerse yourself in the network. Some people become too attached to virtual life and subsequently prefer it to live communication. Introverts often get caught up in the World Wide Web;
Solve business problems. Working online, including for yourself, involves communicating with clients. An effective way to communicate with them is through social networks and instant messengers. There, workers and employers exchange opinions, discuss tasks, projects, fees and terms of cooperation. There they discuss all the important points in the context of cooperation. Many entrepreneurs build businesses on social networks: here they sell goods and offer services. And they do this naturally, simply by communicating with the target audience in a language they understand.
This is only part of the advantages. They often talk about the possibility of exchanging experience, information, and knowledge, but in recent years social networks, forums, and chats have gained the status of “entertainment resources.” People prefer to gain knowledge and search for information on Wikipedia and open scientific libraries.
Virtual communication also has its negative sides. We are not talking about the DarkNet, but about the simplest case of communication between people, including teenagers and children who need control, on social networks and on entertainment forums.
Have you heard anything about DarkNet?
Yes. Once on TV they talked and warned.
58.33%
Yes, sometimes I “walk” there. Why and how is my business.
8.33%
No, this is the first time I found out (found out). I think that this network is bad and needs to be fought against.
8.33%
No. Due to lack of experience, I can’t talk about it as good or bad.
25%
Voted: 12
Disadvantages of virtual communication
The disadvantages of online communication may seem much more serious and outweigh the advantages. But it is not always the case. We encourage you to look at things objectively and evaluate them in the same way.
Here are the disadvantages of communicating on the Internet:
Lack of development of gestures and facial expressions. Often virtual communication is communication “in a mask”. On the Internet, emotions, gestures and facial expressions are replaced by emoticons. It cannot be considered complete in every sense. This can negatively affect a person’s reactions to situations and acts of communication in the process of real, live communications, rather than online communications;
The Internet is changing consciousness. Yes, you can find a lot of interesting and even useful information on the Internet and discover various secrets, but the Internet is a powerful tool for managing public opinion. Interested parties are launching large-scale campaigns on social networks and other platforms. On various social resources you can find information and materials that are not acceptable and even traumatic for the psyche (photos of corpses, calls for violence, drug use);
Deterioration in the quality of speech, development of the habit of speaking slang with a one-time abandonment of the native language. Not every person “filters” what they write. Not every user of social networks and forums prefers to express their thoughts fully and clearly, preferring the simplest and most primitive expressions to their native language. Examples: “in short – krch”; “I see – Mon”; “I love - I love.” On the Internet, children and teenagers, and sometimes some adults, see and literally absorb examples of communication that seem cool or funny to them. Hence the abundance of parasitic words in the speech of teenagers: “like”, “well”, “like that”, “mmm”, “nice”. As a result of long-term online communication, they not only cannot construct sentences normally, but also become accustomed to borrowing, not always correct, correct and adequate acts of use;
The possibility of falling for attackers or facing bullying. We have already talked about this. You can find out more about bullying on the Internet from another publication.
Trends and prospects
The 2022 report from We Are Social and Hootsuite shows compelling user growth across social media. With a total population of about 7.5 billion people, over 3 billion are registered in one application or another. 1 million new registrations occur every day. Moreover, the number of visits to sites from mobile devices is growing - almost 90% of visitors use smartphones and tablets, rather than desktop computers.
At the same time, if a couple of years ago on communication platforms it was possible to quickly find out news and events from the lives of real people, now the situation is radically changing. There are more and more advertisements, posts about “cats”, motivators and other general information. And this is no longer such a close, intimate and familiar circle of friends. The level of trust drops, which means it becomes more difficult to sell something.
More and more startups are emerging, which, although they will not dislodge Facebook from its leadership position in the near future, will attract part of the audience. Planning a marketing campaign requires more attention and with a preliminary analysis of the selected resource, product and target audience.
Forecasts are that active growth will slow down and the social media boom will subside. You shouldn’t give up your usual web portal in favor of only a page on Facebook, VK or another network. The familiar Internet and websites will remain on par with social networks.
Psychological perception of Internet communication
Psychologists identify several personality types that predominate on the Internet. However, the classification presented below is valid primarily for all spheres of human life, and not just for virtual communication.
Here are the four types you might find:
- Visuals. They perceive the surrounding reality and virtual reality mainly visually.
- Auditory learners. They have a developed and dominant auditory system.
- Kinesthetics. They prefer touch and do not prefer virtual communication to live communication.
- Digitals. They are guided by the logic of things, objects and phenomena as such.
Visuals in the context of online communication are characterized by:
- perception of virtual paintings through images;
- desire for gestures, craving for it (they prefer communication in video format);
- willing interaction with graphic information (viewing photos, videos).
Auditory learners are characterized by:
- love for recording and listening to voice messages;
- demanding of your own speech and the speech of your interlocutors;
- good auditory memory;
- love for listening to music on social networks and other platforms.
Kinesthetic skills in the context of online communication are characterized by:
- a tendency to use phrases with a pronounced emotional connotation. Example: “I am delighted (delighted)”;
- desire for physical contact, which is why I don’t prefer to communicate online;
- restlessness and emotionality (they react sharply to criticism, various events, willingly join in conversations).
Digital in the context of virtual communication:
- rarely show emotions, avoid discussions, rarely comment on publications;
- plan online behavior;
- They prefer meaningful conversations with intelligent interlocutors to empty chatter.
What is the most significant advantage of virtual communication?
Destruction of geographical boundaries. This is really cool.
40%
An opportunity to overcome complexes and fears. Why not use the Internet for this?
40%
Of course, business. Thanks to the network, I myself was able to become a successful businessman.
10%
I don’t know, you can look for pros and cons in everything and everywhere.
10%
Voted: 10
How to please your interlocutor on the Internet
Many people, as mentioned above, use communication on the Internet to make new friends. In this regard, the network provides almost limitless possibilities. But in reality it turns out to be not so simple. In order to attract other people in cyberspace, try to properly use the advantages of the Internet and negate its disadvantages.
As stated earlier, no one will appreciate your appearance on the Internet. And this can be both a plus and a minus. If you are accustomed to the idea that beauty is your trump card, prompting people to start getting to know you, then you may feel out of place in online communication. You may feel like no one is paying attention to you. But if there are any shortcomings in your appearance that in everyday life scare away other people, then the Internet can serve you well. It is here that your inner world will become your main trump card, with which men will fall in love.
By the way, about the soul and your thoughts. This is what determines how others will perceive you. Therefore, as many people train their figure and pump up their abs, “pump up” your inner world! Read books, watch films, take an interest in the latest news and events happening in the world.
If you want to meet a man on the Internet, try to develop in the direction of purely masculine topics. Of course, sports, weapons, cars, fishing and similar hobbies are not as interesting as shopping, but you can get involved in it over time. Be sure to visit forums dedicated to similar topics. There are usually much fewer representatives of the fair sex than on other sites. You will be a unique woman who shares the interests of a man, and they are very attracted to this!
But in no case do not forget about your individuality. Since looks don't matter on the Internet, it becomes especially noticeable how similar some girls are to each other. The same interests (such as “expensive clothes, beautiful cars, sexy men”), the same statuses (classics of the genre - “I’m hard to find, easy to lose and impossible to forget”), the same pictures on avatars. All this causes a sad smile in smart and interesting men (and that’s exactly what we need?). Don't try to stand out too much. Just don't be banal.
When communicating, try to be natural. Even if your partner does not see your face and gestures, he can still sense deception and falsehood. Therefore, do not try to maintain a conversation on the topic “cognitive dissonance as a factor in the formation of negative emotions” while constantly using a search engine and Wikipedia. It’s better to honestly admit that you don’t understand anything about this, but you’ll be happy to learn something new. And then your interlocutor (especially a man) will be happy to tell you about it.
At the same time, there is no need to deliberately pretend to be a fool, as many representatives of the fair sex like to do. Of course, some men like this image, but not all. A real man will be interested in communicating with an equal partner. There are no mediocre and unsuccessful people in everything. Most likely, you have a penchant for something, and you may even be an expert in something. And don’t think that your hobby or hobby is not interesting to anyone - this is not true at all. Try going to a forum of people interested in your topic. And you will see how many people you have something to share with.
To make it easier and more pleasant to communicate with you, post a couple of your photos. But only those where you are depicted in a favorable light. Thanks to this, the interlocutor, when talking to you, will imagine you mentally. And this will only improve the relationship and make your contact direct. In addition, some things or events can be conversation starters. For example: “What, you were also in Goa? I love this place! What did you like most?” etc. ... Gradually, such a conversation can lead to a discussion of plans for a joint vacation. Just don’t need to specifically look for topics that can be discussed.
When corresponding on the Internet, watch the manner of your communication - fortunately, the delay in responses allows you to do this. For example, if in life you are scolded for speaking too complexly or for using too many filler words, then online you can control this. And gradually this useful habit can move from conversations on the Internet into real life. And then the benefits of social networks and communication forums will become obvious.
Communication on the Internet on various topics is generally a useful and safe platform for practicing new behavior options. For example, you always wanted to be bold and relaxed when communicating with men. And there is nothing better than trying it on the Internet! The worst that can happen is that you cut off contact and never see these partners again. And if you like it, you can transfer the acquired style into everyday life with relative ease.
Dating websites
There are many stories when virtual relationships as a result of online dating developed into relationships. At one time, this became a real trend, which is why dating sites began to appear. Interested people can:
- get positive emotions from communicating with peers, people younger and older of any gender from different countries;
- leave pleasant comments under the photos and posts of users you like;
- expand your circle of acquaintances and even find true love.
People spending time on dating sites have different goals. Some people are looking for sincere communication and love, others just want to make new friends. However, there is also a place for scammers here. Be vigilant and try not to succumb to provocations, do not disclose personal information and try to maintain composure. Remember about the possibility of encountering fake profiles on which attackers are “sitting”.
Underwater rocks
Speaking about the pitfalls of virtual communication, it is worth returning to the previously mentioned negative points. This is the activity of scammers and extortionists. These are fake pages and the Dark Web. We recommend that you once again read the sections “Dating Sites” (last paragraph) and “Disadvantages of Virtual Communication”.
General principles for virtual communication and relationships in real life
To ensure that virtual communication and relationships in real life are built on social principles and norms, are strong and do not bring disappointment, it is recommended:
- comply with generally accepted rules of behavior and social norms. Both online and in real life;
- adhere to the principle of uniqueness of communication. Almost all types of human activity are structured in the “subject-object” format. They influence objects and modify them. Communication is built in the “subject-subject” format and presupposes equal interaction between individuals;
- strive to be guided by the principle of dialogic communication. It involves social interaction between several participants, the task of the process is to transfer meaningful information from person to person on the basis of mutual respect.
What outweighs: the pros or cons of virtual communication?
Let it be “equal”. I am someone who believes that there are many pros and cons everywhere.
50%
I think there are more advantages, but I can’t ignore the disadvantages. We need to look for a compromise and not “vegetate” on the Internet.
37.5%
I think the disadvantages outweigh. None of the advantages, even together they can cover even one disadvantage.
12.5%
Voted: 8
Millennial Etiquette
The British conducted a study and asked people what, in their opinion, is the biggest violation of etiquette.
1. littering - 72% 2. listening to music too loudly - 56% 3. talking too loudly in public transport - 53% 4. using the phone at the dinner table - 52% 5. reading other people's messages - 50% 6. taking up too much space in the kitchen crowded transport - 49% 7. looking at the phone, not at the interlocutor - 47% 8. talking to someone without taking out headphones - 42% 9. making tea for yourself and not offering it to those present - 36% 10. scrolling through someone's photo album online without asking - 33%
At least 5 out of 10 points relate to our digital behavior.
“Our digital behavior matters. The way we behave in virtual space becomes part of our identity.”
And, of course, when we talk about digital behavior, two things must be mentioned:
- Digital etiquette.
- Rules for correct, convenient and effective interaction in the digital space.
FAQ
The following are answers to questions asked by people interested in the topic of virtual communication.
What social networks exist?
There are many of them. These are VKontakte, Odnoklassniki, Facebook, Ask.fm, Instagram, LiveJournal and others. There are closed and open social networks, public and designed for people with certain skills or hobbies. Some communication tools have more, others are tailored to specific interaction formats. Try different ones to find yours.
Virtual love: does it happen or not?
Yes. But more often in teenagers. It doesn't lead to anything. However, it has already been mentioned that some people manage to build strong relationships on the Internet, which subsequently develop into full-fledged real connections.
What is effective communication on the Internet?
As in real life, this is a manner of communication in which one person manages to captivate, interest, and intrigue people. A person who communicates effectively knows how to lead others and motivate them.
How does the Internet help in life?
The Internet is a library of useful knowledge and information that cannot be measured. There are books, manuals, instructions and more. It is also a means of communication for people who, for various reasons, are geographically distant from each other. Entrepreneurs around the world do business here.
What are the dangers in social networks?
We recommend that you read the sections “Dating Sites” (last paragraph) and “Disadvantages of Virtual Communication”. The relevant information is provided there.
What is surrogate communication?
This is a type of communication and exchange of information through computers and mobile devices with the ability to connect to the Internet. The main share of surrogate communication is carried out through the network.
What are the consequences of a lack of communication?
Mental and physical consequences. Psychologists and sociologists note that, first of all, man is a social being. We cannot live without communication. Imagine that from childhood a baby is deprived of communication with parents and other people. It is clear that in this case all areas of its development are at risk. This is just an example that clearly demonstrates the consequences of a lack of communication. That’s why it’s so important to sometimes do this, at least on the Internet, if friendships and relationships don’t work out in real life. It will almost definitely work online!
Rules for correspondence by email
Image: Business photo created by dashu83 – www.freepik.com
- Try to minimize and shorten the text of the letter. Follow a simple principle: the letter should contain no more and no less information than necessary.
- Your e-mail should not contain nicknames, pet names, obscene or offensive words. It is not advisable to add the year of birth to your email address.
- Each letter must contain a subject. If we want to find this letter in a week, month or year, the topic will help a lot. The subject of the letter should be, first of all, informative.
- Don't confuse the "Reply" and "Reply all" buttons!
- Correctly sign the transferred files. If this is, for example, an application for leave, name the file “Application for leave of Ivanova MI.” Be sure to include your last name so that your application does not look impersonal in the general flow of documents.
- Avoid excessive punctuation and excessive formatting so as not to distract attention from the main point.
- Re-read the letter before sending. It turns out that the thing that irritates people the most when it comes to digital etiquette are mistakes in messages and emails. Check for typos and if T9 has corrected some words.
- Write from the bottom up. First, attach the file, then write the text of the letter itself, and then enter the sender's name in the address bar.
- Don't write on emotions. What is written will not disappear and correcting the consequences of emotional writing is much more difficult than words spoken out loud.
- Remember that any letter may become available to the general public. Perhaps the chain of letters with your participation will be forwarded to someone else or screenshotted.
- Always address the person exactly as they introduce themselves. Don't call him Dmitry if he introduces himself as Dima.
Formulations with a bad reputation
- “Thank you in advance”
- the phrase leaves no chance for colleagues - you expect only a positive result from them, without considering other options for the development of events. - “I heard you”
is a passive-aggressive formulation. - “Good day”
- never greet your colleagues with this phrase.
This is a colloquial office expression, which, moreover, is used in the wrong context. Write a neutral “Hello”
,
“Good afternoon”
. - "URGENTLY!!!"
- with this phrase you devalue all the work of employees who are now also not sitting idle.
It’s better to write a specific date and time at which you need to prepare the information: “Please prepare the report before 15:00 on August 5.
”
