In this article we will tell you:
- First steps if you like a man
- Options for behavior if you like a man
- Difficulties on the way to winning the heart of the man you like
What to do if you like a man, but you don’t know how to attract his attention? We definitely need to come up with something! After all, when our heart trembles, life plays with bright colors and takes on a new meaning.
It’s not for nothing that they say that you have to fight for love. What if this object of sympathy is your destiny? In order not to miss the chance for happiness, read our article. We will tell you how to attract the attention of your chosen one and charm him forever.
We act depending on the man’s behavior
Even if there are no obvious signs and signals of falling in love, girls always realize that they are not indifferent to this particular person. In addition, reciprocal attraction can be provoked by your attention and interest; often colleagues or long-known people “suddenly” fall in love with each other.
It is a girl who, if she likes a guy, is able to unobtrusively arrange a delicate situation in which he will feel like an initiator and an experienced alpha male.
Signs that he likes you
The gaze is directed at the object of interest - the man, like a “hunter,” watches the movement of the girl of interest, tries to follow her trajectory.
He tries to meet his eyes in order to understand the reaction to his actions, in addition, his facial expression changes, it becomes more interested, concentrated on this person.
Speech becomes more animated - the guy you like is trying in every way to attract attention.
The fact is that in nature, the conquest of a female occurs in literally a few minutes, but in a socialized society sometimes it takes several months to achieve trust and response. The verbal method is the most accessible and simplest; it helps to present yourself and your hidden strengths.
Behavior intensifies - the young man performs more actively, improvises, tries to show his strength and endurance, various merits in order to receive a dose of attention and admiration. Shows unusual group qualities, for example, demonstrates dominant, leadership traits, although usually he is in a subordinate position.
Various signs of attention - an offer to help with school or work, to go home together or to go somewhere to relax.
Seemingly aimless, far-fetched requests and offers, just to be closer to the girl. This is the leading property of men - to get closer to the desired prey in order to eventually drag it into their territory.
Read more in the article: 17 signs that a guy likes you.
Signs that he doesn't intend to build a relationship
Situational communication without continuation - a young man can communicate with you, fulfill your request, dance at a “corporate party”, but does not offer any further scenarios, does not try to find out the home address or otherwise show the prospects of the relationship.
The fact is that girls perceive any acquaintance as a potential partnership, cohabitation, and even unwanted applicants are kept “in reserve,” just in case. And a man is able to immediately understand and evaluate how much he needs this girl in the future, whether he should waste time, energy and emotions.
Read: What is the difference between love and infatuation?
He calmly talks about other meetings and contacts, various entertainments - he does this to share information and impressions, and not to ruin your mood. Learn to calmly perceive other people's relationships so as not to get hung up on them and not waste precious mental resources.
If he becomes noticeably nervous in response to your stories about other guys, this again does not indicate his personal interest. It’s just that men don’t really like to hear about other people’s male achievements, they have a competitive nature of relationships and they are sensitive to other people’s successes, constantly comparing themselves with others.
While girls are more confident in their own irresistibility and that they can achieve any man, they just need to dye their hair color and wear a shorter skirt.
We recommend reading: 13 ways to please a guy and make him fall in love with you.
Universal ways to find out the situation
If you really like a guy, the easiest way is to talk to the young man about relationships, find out if he has a permanent girlfriend. You can act indirectly: ask how best to show the young man your sympathy. Based on his answers, it will not be difficult to guess how he feels about your communication.
Oddly enough, those around you notice changes in feelings most quickly, so you should pay attention when colleagues, friends, relatives, neighbors jokingly or seriously discuss your relationship.
They are able to instantly diagnose them and make a verdict like this: “You look great together!” or “He doesn’t deserve a bit of trust!” Subsequently, the collective opinion often turns out to be infallible, even if it seemed to you that it was contrary to your happiness and wonderful future.
Men are grateful to girls who are able to take initiative, because it is much more difficult for them to survive refusal or outright ignorance. Invite a young man to a movie or a concert, give him a gift for the holiday, give him compliments more often so that he understands that you are highlighting him and encouraging him to take further actions.
#15 Emotional overload
Either you are happy or you are sad. Either you are jealous or you ignore him. If you're experiencing an emotional rollercoaster , it may be because you're trying to rationalize your feelings.
Feelings for someone can be overwhelming, especially when you've never felt it before. You just need to accept your feelings, then it will be easier.
Don't try to get rid of your emotions, it will only make you crazy. Instead, take a deep breath and calm down. You already know the truth, you just need to accept it.
What to do depending on the situation
– I’ll write to him in messenger and give him a “like”. - That's right, you will get an answer or silence, which will show his opinion of you.
Read How long does falling in love last and when does true love begin?
“If he doesn’t answer, I’ll throw a tantrum at home and throw the phone against the wall.” - Wrong, the hysteria will pass, but the phone will have to be repaired.
Even when falling in love, you should act rationally, checking yourself at every step with the following question: What result do I want to get? Even if he doesn't fit your idea of romance, there's no need to stalk or humiliate him. Thus, you immerse yourself even more in a meaningless situation and scare away normal people.
Don't miss the article: 6 ways to get a guy's attention without looking stupid.
If you are not familiar
If you met the prince of your dreams in transport or at work, you can safely use the given chance. Come up and say: “Hello! I think we know each other?”
By the voice and words of a young man you can always understand how ready he is to continue communication, and whether you like him at close range.
If the guy is your colleague
A great option if you like a guy at work - comfortable, practical, but only if you are not connected by a business relationship that can affect personal ones and vice versa. If your job functions do not depend on each other (different departments, different responsibilities), start flirting and flirting.
And if your actions are interconnected, think repeatedly about what this could lead to, or whether you will have to break off the relationship or look for another job. As practice shows, “industrial romances” distort the perception of each other, additional claims and reasons for dissatisfaction arise.
If it's the boss
Most likely, the “nurse syndrome” operates when a person falls in love with someone on whom he or she depends in one way or another, to whom he owes his health or salary.
Moreover, the boss most often becomes a man with character, with charisma, who is capable of making a lasting impression. And no one has canceled the material indicators. But keep in mind that in personal relationships the boss may turn out to be completely different: greedy, capricious, aggressive.
Assess a person’s well-being not by the numbers on a bank card, but by what gifts and bonuses you receive. Judging by the results of the experiment, even imaginary money greatly changes people's opinions. Psychologists gave two groups exactly the same photographs and asked them to characterize these men. Only one group said they were low-income workers, and the other said they were millionaires. Guess who deserves more positive ratings.
Big difference in age
Similar to the plot with the boss: I liked an older man who seems caring, experienced, generous, and capable of improvisation.
And this really happens in reality, but conflict also increases: an authoritarian style of relationships, old habits and responsibilities, unwillingness to change or admit that others are right.
If there are no drastic changes or talks about starting a family for six months, most likely he is simply living for his own pleasure while you dream of a wedding. So you can sometimes “conduct an audit” and ask about joint plans so that no one has any misconceptions or disappointments.
Here we can recommend the article - If a man is 10 years older: the advantages and disadvantages of a relationship.
If the man is married
There is an expression: “A man does not marry a woman, but her family.” Most often, married men evoke desire as if they were isolated beings, purified substances in a vacuum.
Read 17 signs a guy likes you
In fact, behind him is a trail of family and social relationships that are difficult to rebuild. This will inevitably cause complications with his mistress or new wife.
We remember: What result do I want to get? If we meet for a couple of dates, it’s possible. If you replace his wife and former life, it’s doubtful.
Only 10–15% of “leftists” end in a new marriage, so the conclusions are obvious. It is remarriages that cause most of all depression, conflicts, neuroses and various psychological traumas.
He's in love with someone else
He's probably just used to his girlfriend and doesn't think about the fact that real destiny is just a few steps away. The main thing is not to force things, men are very careful, cunning creatures, capable of camouflaging themselves for a long time.
Your task is to be nearby and show your friendly, interested attitude. Gradually close the distance: ask how you are doing, find out details of your personal life.
If you really like a man, you shouldn’t drag out the situation either, so as not to turn into a “habitual target” that does not cause attraction.
After two to three months of confidential communication, you will understand whether you still want to be with him, whether he is ready to pay attention to you and give up his relationship. In any case, you will gain invaluable experience and an express course in the study of male psychology, which will definitely come in handy later.
When he ignores you
Unlike girls, guys do not ignore those they like; it is treacherous women who can die with the desire to meet, but mysteriously remain silent for several days, creating unnecessary intrigue and causing unnecessary jealousy. If he ignores, he is either very busy, or simply does not see the point in your relationship and does not want to make false promises.
What result do I want to get? “I’ll begin to engage in self-development and learn a thousand ways to tie a climbing knot to attract his attention, or I’ll write a message that I ate a kilogram of pills and went to look for the highest roof in the city.” Unrequited love is also beautiful - it elevates and helps to comprehend the depth of mental torment.
How to achieve RECIPROCITY and get the HAPPIEST relationship
Rule #4: Make friends with him
As soon as you managed to adjust your external type to his preferences, and he even began to sometimes look in your direction (even if in surprise, the main thing is that he looks!), it is important for you to make friends with him. To begin with, just make friends.
How to behave to make a guy like you? It’s possible that even if you attract his attention, but don’t “catch him” with anything other than the appropriate appearance, then all your efforts will be in vain. Remember the first point? It is better to hide your whims and self-will for the time being. You will still have time to demonstrate your “I don’t know who I want, who I don’t want.”
It is important for you to show him your concern, understanding, kindness and excellent sense of humor. You are not a boring bluestocking who sits quietly in the corner and is afraid of everyone. You are a beautiful (!), confident girl. You have a goal, and the goal has you. Don't be afraid to laugh at some ridiculous situation. You can laugh at yourself too. Self-criticism is an excellent quality, by the way.
If for some reason you can’t make friends, you shouldn’t give up what you started. Look for compromises, be interested in the young man. Always smile and greet him, ask how he is doing and what mood he is in. If you work together, bring him coffee. Make him feel exceptional in your life.
A little bragging wouldn't hurt him. By the way, after several morning visits to him with coffee, you will definitely find common topics for conversation. At least what kind of coffee do you both prefer? And after 21 days, according to the same psychologists, this will become a habit. Apparently both
Is it possible to act first?
In many cases, this is the only correct strategy with a guy you like, due to personal and social reasons.
Many guys simply do not have enough experience to cope with such a difficult task as approaching a girl and finding out her name. This is more difficult than creating a new search engine or organizing an expedition to the peaks of the Northern Urals.
In addition, public opinion manifests itself in a strange way: it stimulates “masculine actions”, but at the same time does not guarantee a polite and pleasant attitude on the part of girls. Therefore, act contrary to standards and stereotypes; real feelings justify any impulsive maneuvers.
We recommend reading: How to confess your love to a guy.
Signs that he doesn't intend to build a relationship
And finally, if the girl finally confessed her feelings to the guy, and he even reciprocated, but something goes wrong. The man is in no hurry to start a relationship. Perhaps he is not ready for anything serious right now. But how can we understand this? It's simple:
- The initiator of communication is a girl; he never writes or greets first.
- Doesn't introduce him to friends.
- Doesn't show signs of attention, doesn't try to surprise.
- Changes plans, even after agreeing with the girl in advance.
- Lack of support, refusal to meet.
- Avoids intimate contact.
- Does not share problems, but actively discusses them with friends.
- Ignores conversations about a future together.
It’s better to ask the guy directly whether he is in the mood for closer communication or not. A man can explain what is preventing him from starting a relationship, perhaps for good reasons. But you shouldn’t cut off contact with him right away. Perhaps he is not ready for this now, but friendly communication will convince him that this is the girl he has been waiting for for so long.
Common mistakes girls make
- Waiting and enduring is useless and pointless, no one will appreciate your sacrifice, on the contrary, the man will get used to it and will be surprised at the insubordination.
- Excessive demands - if you are looking for a slave or a sponsor, then it is unlikely that your expectations will soon be fulfilled. No one is obliged to support you, go to the casino or wait for an inheritance.
- Share details of communication with others - no need to complain or gossip a lot, respect the privacy of personal relationships. Especially if the young man has entrusted you with confidential information.
What not to do if you want a guy to like you. the guy will like you.”>
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Rule No. 6: Keep it in moderation
Even if you don't feel the guy's irritation and everything is going well, it's still important not to relax. Neither you nor him. Keep everything in moderation. Even in communication. Do you often ask him to do all the work? Today and tomorrow just don't do it.
Do you give him a ride home from work? Today you have other plans. And tomorrow you have an important meeting with a friend at yoga. Forgot to bring him coffee in the morning? It's OK. And in the evening they passed by and didn’t say goodbye: well, it happens.
Find out in this way, does he really need you? And for what purpose? Perhaps you yourself will come to some conclusions. And maybe you’ll make him think about your importance in his life.
If in a couple of days he himself offers to give you a ride, is it worth refusing? And even if he doesn’t notice the lack of your participation, are you sure that you still really need him? Need it? Then we restore our reputation and continue to take an interest in his affairs.
Rule No. 7: Praise and admire
After such a risky step as a little ignoring, it is important to “recover” in his eyes. Just smile at him when he least expects it and tell him he has a great suit. Or a beautiful hairstyle. Or stunning shoes.
Or tell him how excited you are about his new project. You can even give him an idea or two. If you don't mind, of course. Let him curry favor with his superiors. Men are more receptive to praise from superiors. But he will know to whom he owes it.
