How to attract interest by correspondence: 7 rules of online communication

We partially live in a virtual world. That’s why we often think about how to interest this or that person through correspondence. It could be a potential client, a cute guy or a girl you like - it doesn’t matter. There are seven rules of online communication that we consider universal.

Write correctly

Now there are a lot of programs that help check spelling and punctuation - even if the message, taking into account your knowledge, will not be perfect, but gross errors will be polished out. Recipients of messages who are familiar with the Russian language are often put off by too obvious mistakes and phrases without punctuation marks. Don't know a word? Look in the dictionary or replace it with a simpler but familiar one. If you don’t feel the strength to write beautifully and competently, take into account your sore spot, apologize in advance to your interlocutor for the inconvenience - but this is for very difficult cases, if your command of the language is very poor. Improve your knowledge and the question of how to interest a girl by correspondence will be asked less and less often.

Instead of several small messages in a row, we write one long one

Very similar to the previous point. But let’s imagine that someone writes many short messages in a row
and each of them is a complete thought.

For the reader, once the notification is received, the switching process takes time. Therefore, in order to increase reading efficiency, it should switch as little as possible.

By t we mean time.

And yet, not everyone turns off notifications in chats that are important to them. Therefore, it is quite annoying to receive 10 notifications initiated by one person.

Exception:

when each thought is so strong that someone might want to respond specifically to it with the original message attached, then they are still worth writing down separately.

Life hack: Telegram has a Slow Mode setting that limits the frequency of sending messages to group chats. Read more.

Be careful with emotional messages

Not all people understand what functions an exclamation mark or large font (CapsLock) performs. When communicating, even with friends, do not use either one or the other. There must be a serious reason for the exclamation mark - especially don’t put several at the end of each sentence. You are trying to express approval, support, joy, and the person on the other side of the screen thinks that they are raising their voice at him. This can complicate further conversation and make communication tense. Use periods, commas, avoid large font. When thinking about how to interest a pen pal emotionally, choose emoticons and stickers. Today it is an important means of communication.

How people communicate on the Internet

Live and direct communication includes many different types and types: business, friendly, formal, spiritual, educational, verbal, non-verbal and so on. Communication on the Internet, unlike physical communication, can be reduced to three main types:

  • Business

One of the main reasons why the Internet is developing so quickly and efficiently is because it serves business goals and objectives. Fifteen years ago, all work issues were resolved by us by telephone, fax or mail. However, now even the cleaning lady has her own email address. After all, this way she can send her resume to any company, and not go there, wait for an appointment, and give a piece of paper to the recruiting manager.

Compared to conventional ones, business communication via the global network is much cheaper for organizations. You provide dedicated Internet, install Skype, and your employee can answer calls from all over the world. Plus, you don’t have to wait several weeks for papers to be sent to you from, say, Canada. Two minutes - and you're done. Here you can conduct training seminars - they are also called webinars - and network conferences. The transfer of information is easy, and the costs of such events are negligible.

Thanks to the Internet, such an area of ​​business life as freelancing is rapidly developing. Previously, it was very difficult for a young mother on maternity leave to find a job that met her needs: with a flexible schedule, interesting and well-paid. But now, thanks to various freelance exchanges and opportunities to work via the Internet, it has become real.

  • Informal

The Internet, as a means of communication, functions not only in business terms, but also in personal terms. Moreover, informal contacts currently occupy the lion's share of our lives. Now, probably, there is no longer a person left who does not sit on social networks and does not flinch at the sound of ICQ running.

The Internet is one of the most common answers to the question of how to find a partner, because it is thanks to the global network that it has become possible to search for your soul mate among millions of other people. You can provide only the information you want about yourself and it will certainly be easier for you to control what you say. In doing so, you will be able to make the appropriate impression.

But the above advantages smoothly turn into disadvantages when your partner has the same capabilities. Agree, it’s disappointing when, after a long correspondence, you meet a person in person, and he turns out to be completely different from what you imagined. A tall, blue-eyed, blond man with a two-story villa can turn into a short, plump man who last went to work two years ago. And there is no magic in this. This person just wanted to please you.

But the Internet is more than capable of satisfying the need for communication - which is why it is now believed that you cannot be lonely if you have access to the Internet. But is it? Do you feel happy when you close your Facebook page and go to sleep in an empty bed?

  • Gaming

This type is placed in a separate category from the informal type due to its place in human lives. Online games are a huge layer of modern culture. The nature of communication depends on the type of toy. For example, communication in role-playing games (so-called “adventure games”) is built on the principle of theater and masks. Each participant is assigned his own special role, which he plays to the end.

Sometimes characters need to unite to achieve a common goal. For example, you need to kill the main sorcerer or defeat someone else's clan. And then group correspondence takes on the character of communication, accompanied by some kind of joint activity. At the same time, the characters love each other and can even gather at gatherings of similar interests.

Communication in other games such as “shooting games” and racing is distinguished by its aggressiveness (this is not surprising, because the goal of the game is victory at any cost). Friendship usually has no place here. By the way, this is why you should limit access to such sites if you have small children.

In intellectual games (such as preference, chess, checkers), people’s conversations are more reminiscent of conversations between old friends who have gathered together. They are distinguished by a variety of topics and a unique manner of discussion. Here no one will insult, ridicule or offend you. You can only run into aggression if you are a beginner who is rude to your elders, or if you are trying to deceive your partner.

A few words about emoticons

This invention of the virtual world has become firmly established in the life of modern man. But you also need to know how to use emoticons. They are appropriate to accompany a letter when you want to convey certain emotions or mood. Clean emoticons are relevant at the end of a dialogue, when you say goodbye to your interlocutor and exchange your last remarks. Messages with stickers are not suitable as a greeting or start of a dialogue - it gives the impression that you are not particularly bothered in preparing for communication. Under no circumstances should you use these cute drawings as an answer to a direct question - it’s stupid and ugly, especially if the person is expecting a clear answer. There is a lot of advice in psychology on how to interest a guy by correspondence. But the main one sounds like this: put yourself in the shoes of your interlocutor, feel what kind of communication you would like, but do not reduce everything to your own worldview - we are talking about general features like politeness and adequacy.

Netiquette: Protecting Children

In everyday life, study and work, we all use the Internet, but this carries certain risks and has a number of disadvantages , for example, the darknet. Discuss with your child the possible dangers of using the Internet. Respect your child's personal space , but explain to him the following rules of conduct for children on the Internet .

Don't disclose personal information

It is very important to keep personal information private, especially in the age of social media where identity theft through social engineering is common. passwords or personal information such as name , address and telephone number be shared online . The name of the school and sections should also be kept secret.

Use neutral nicknames

It is recommended that your child use neutral nicknames that do not reveal his or her identity. Additionally, neutral nicknames ensure that other people don't feel offended or ridiculed.

Netiquette: Bots and Trolls

Bots are computer programs that automatically perform tasks without human interaction. Bots often publish comments or even posts on social networks.

They are often a source of spam on forums and in comments under other users' posts, which is annoying and takes time to identify and delete messages from bots. Bots do not respect netiquette and should be avoided if possible.

Rules of conduct for children on the Internet: do not trust chat participants

A child should always treat strangers with a healthy skepticism - it is unknown who is really hiding behind the funny name and cute profile photo. For example, a child should never, under any circumstances, date a stranger just because they had a pleasant chat, as this could be an attacker.

You also need to explain to your child that you should not add strangers as friends on social networks such as Facebook or Instagram. In addition, you should not download attachments when opening emails or other messages, as this may accidentally download a Trojan horse or other malicious program.

Equality first: no one should feel like an outsider

When communicating in a closed group, you should refrain from making “initiated” jokes that are not understandable to all group members - it is better to send a private message. Other chat participants should not feel like strangers . The core values ​​of netiquette include tolerance, respect and helpfulness . This also means communicating in a language that everyone can understand .

When giving a story or presentation in a school group chat, you need to make sure that all participants are on the same level. If your child is explaining a topic that may not be clear to everyone, it is recommended that you answer questions about that topic.

Netiquette for Kids: Be Brief and To the Point

Messages, answers, and even questions should be as brief and clear . Nobody wants to read unnecessary text that does not help find the answer to the question.

Cumbersome language and repetitions only clog up chats and forums, and grammatical errors make it difficult to read and understand what is written. Forwarding chain letters also goes beyond respectful online communication.

Netiquette and Online Learning: Tips for Students

During the COVID-19 pandemic, most school learning has been conducted online. The so-called homeschooling (schooling at home) became a new problem that students, teachers and parents solved together. Here are some tips for effective homeschooling:

  • Children should support each other, for example, by answering classmates' questions in the chat.
  • Recordings and screenshots should not be taken during lessons without prior permission from the teacher.
  • Polite and respectful communication is absolutely essential when homeschooling.
  • School-provided passwords and credentials must not be shared with third parties under any circumstances.
  • Children should be ready a few minutes before the start of class in order to start on time. It is necessary to prepare training materials and turn on the camera for video conference. In addition, the child must be dressed as if he were going to school.
  • If questions or comments arise, the student can speak up and then mute the microphone again to avoid disturbing the lesson with background noise.

Greetings

The type of greeting you choose largely determines how you communicate further. Don’t try to invent something unique, avoid clerical cliches, nonsense like “good day,” etc. A simple “hello” or “hello” will be enough. Try not to limit your first message to just that. Add information right away to give you a lead. For example: “Hey, do you have a minute?” Or: “Hello. Can I chat with you about work?” etc. - depends on the specific occasion. Your first message should set the tone for the further flow of the conversation. A simple greeting is often not enough - the person may not be interested in it.

Using email

E-mail allows you to communicate with recipients from different cities and countries. Email correspondence has certain rules, cultural and business norms.

E-mail etiquette includes:

  • principles of communication between recipients;
  • competent writing of letters;
  • their correct design.

In the letter you must fill out all fields and indicate the subject (title, heading). It is recommended to fill in the recipient's mailing address last. The text of the letter itself can be saved in a separate file, because the message does not always reach the addressee.

The text must contain a greeting, addressing the recipient by name and patronymic (if such data is available). No errors, clear content, structured information, easy-to-read font—these are the basic requirements for an email. The tone of the message cannot contain insults or curses.

The principles of communication by e-mail are identical to the rules of the network. You need to correctly construct phrases and sentences, check grammar and spelling. You should not write words in capital letters or overuse abbreviations. It is advisable to use your signature at the very end of the email.

Emails should be answered with mutual respect for the senders. Working with mail depends on the discipline of the recipient. It is necessary to regularly review your mail and send responses in a timely manner. A response sent on time characterizes the recipient on the positive side.

Appeals

Many examples of how to interest a girl by correspondence contain many harmful tips. One of them is using cute names like “sweetheart,” “cat,” “bunny,” or cheesy pick-up artist-style compliments. Or you might think of using a diminutive form of the name. If you don’t want to get blacklisted right away, wait a while with both. Often compliments of this kind sound ridiculous, and even unpleasant from a stranger. And some people don't like certain forms of the name - they prefer not to be called that. You may not guess, and then the communication will end before it begins.

Why is communication via the Internet dangerous?

Like any other phenomenon in our lives, online communication has its drawbacks. Therefore, before you plunge headlong into the World Wide Web and forget about the real world, think about whether you need it. Weigh the pros and cons, assess the danger and future prospects.

The good thing is that you can contact anyone in just a couple of seconds. At the same time, you won’t have to pay fabulous sums for communications and communication. Negative aspects include abuse of anonymity, frequent deception, as well as Internet addiction.

Abuse of anonymity or who is who

Quite often, when meeting people on the Internet, people, instead of being themselves, invent a new personality for themselves and play it. Therefore, lying becomes a rather serious problem in online communication. And if people do not tell the truth about themselves, then establishing trusting contacts becomes impossible. When dating online, there is no responsibility or obligation, and without them no serious relationship is possible. Research by psychologists shows that representatives of the fair sex most often suffer from fantasies and inventing a new “I”.

Deception: scammers are allowed entry

During online communication, you can easily deceive another person. As mentioned above, due to anonymity, you do not have true information about the gender, age, social status, or work of your interlocutor. What he says is often very difficult or almost impossible to verify. That is why you must be especially careful when communicating over the Internet. Often, maniacs lure the victim to them in this way. Would you be suspicious if a person with whom you have developed a trusting relationship invites you for a cup of coffee after a date?

It is enough just to be skeptical about what is said and not to trust everything that is said to you at the initial stage of acquaintance. You'll be smart to be wary of what people tell you about themselves. It is especially difficult when your relationship is still in its infancy. It is also worth talking carefully and carefully about your life. Fraudsters usually use the data to find out passwords, codes and other information that will help them get rich.

Therefore, pay attention to the fact that self-disclosure should only be mutual. In any case, take your time and first talk about abstract topics, and then about personal ones. Anonymity and deception become especially dangerous when children communicate online. That is why you should pay special attention to how and with whom your child corresponds or calls on the Internet.

Internet addiction or say no to real life

The delights of online communication can cause the deterioration of “ordinary” human relationships. In particular, there are cases where families broke up due to the fact that one of the spouses spent too much time communicating on social networks with members of the opposite sex. In addition, communication on the Internet is characterized by permissiveness, relaxation, and lack of shyness.

It’s easier to meet people online and find like-minded people on any issue. And a person, having become accustomed to such ease and the lack of effort in communication, begins to plunge deeper and deeper into the abyss of online communications. And then the Internet turns from good to evil. To determine if you have an Internet addiction, try answering the questions below honestly.

Virtual addiction test:

  • When you're offline, do you feel depressed, in a bad mood, and irritated?
  • Can you spend the last of your money on the Internet and online entertainment?
  • Are you at risk of losing your family, job or relationships with friends because you spend too much time online?
  • Do you think about the Internet without being online?
  • Do you need to spend more time on the Internet to increase your comfort?
  • Do you sometimes feel like you can't live without the Internet?
  • When you go online, do you spend much more time there than you planned?
  • Do you use the Internet to escape from real problems and cope with anxiety, depression or guilt?
  • Do you occasionally lie to your family and friends, downplaying the amount of time you spend online?

If you answered yes to at least three questions, then you should consider whether using the Internet is causing too much harm to your life. Remember that, despite all the advantages that communication on the global network has, it also has serious limitations and cannot completely replace relationships in the real world.

People who have an addiction find it quite difficult to get rid of it. In the twenty-first century it is considered a serious disease. In this case, you will need the help of a specialist who will understand the problems that led to this disease. He will also set the patient in the right mood.

Contents of the conversation

During the first conversation, do not go into lengthy discussions, do not touch on resonant topics: religion, politics, attitudes towards minorities, etc. Are you thinking about how to interest a man by correspondence? Don't start asking in detail about his personal life. The same goes for girls. If you are interested in further acquaintance, it is enough to know that the person has no family. Don’t ask why a girl at that age is not married, and a man still does not have children. Be gentle and you will be rewarded in kind. Try to interest them in common interests, conversations about other useful things - films, books, art, hobbies, sports, etc.

Virtual sex communication

One of the types of virtual sex is communication intended for pleasure. Conversations of an intimate nature cause excitement and can lead to orgasm. Virtual intimate communication can take place both between acquaintances and strangers. Its specificity is based on a gradual increase in excitement with the help of relaxed phrases that tell about what a person is doing or wants to do at a certain moment. In this matter, lack of embarrassment is of great importance. You can reinforce the correspondence with a video, which will increase the excitement.

Don't be intrusive and don't disappear

In other words: keep your distance. If you send dozens of messages every day, you may get bored, and if you disappear for three days, you will be forgotten and exchanged for another candidate for communication. And remember: in correspondence, a lot depends on how you read the messages you received in your head. The same goes for the other person. There are things that are easy to deceive - so try to make the communication real if possible.

Back Next

What are social networks and why are they dangerous?

Social networks are gaining more and more popularity and are becoming an important part of our lives. A page on Odnoklassniki, VKontakte or Facebook is a reflection of your Self. Through the same profiles of your friends, you learn the latest news from their lives, listen to the music they prefer. Watch movies that your colleagues or comrades have uploaded. There is a concern that communication on the Internet will completely replace real communication in the near future. Is this so, and what benefit do we have from the World Wide Web?

Many animals interact with each other, but only humans do this not for joint hunting or survival, but simply for the sake of pleasure. Only Homo Sapiens (homo sapiens) have a need for communication as such. From a psychological point of view, communicative relationships are the process of establishing and developing contacts between people. Arises from the need for collaboration and involves exchanging information as well as perceiving and influencing each other.

What are the specifics of communication on the Internet? Due to anonymity, there are no barriers to interaction based on gender, age, appearance, social status, financial status, and so on on the list. There is an opportunity to create any impression about yourself. It’s interesting that many people tend to invent a different life and image for themselves in general. This applies to so-called “virtual personalities”. These people do things that a person would never dare to do in everyday life.

So, for example, a shy representative of the fair sex can flirt with respectable and intelligent men, a harassed teenage boy will insult and criticize older people, a person offended by life will be rude and prove that she is right. Where else can you show your character without fear of receiving serious rebuff from your opponent?

An important feature of communication on the Internet is also voluntariness. You and only you determine who you will communicate with now. And if you get tired of it, you can simply switch off. (For the same reason, sometimes interruptions in communication can be misinterpreted by interlocutors as a reluctance to communicate with them). But in real life you will have to be responsible for all your actions and actions.

Communication on the Internet, just like regular communication, has two sides - exchange of information and perception. Here we get to know each other, establish contacts and establish relationships with people we like. However, in network communication (due to the lack of a common physical space), the third party is limited - interaction with each other. You will not be able to touch a person, hug him, look into his eyes. You won’t understand whether your friend is telling the truth or what your significant other is doing at that particular moment.

But this same feature makes online communication so universal and limitless. Wherever you are, all you have to do is turn on your computer and find the network. You just have to want it, and there will be a huge number of people in front of you who want to talk. In reality, it is very difficult to find a friend who would share your thoughts, ideas, and suggest how and what should be done in a given situation.

The perception of another person on the Internet is also limited. Most online communication is carried out through written language, which cannot express your intonation or facial expressions. Dialogue cannot be accompanied by any eloquent gesture. Mutual understanding often suffers from this. Tell me how you will understand that your interlocutor really likes you without hearing the trembling in his voice, a sly look and a flirting smile.

Proponents of online correspondence decided to eliminate this drawback. They tried to create a special language for Internet communication. It, like many other slangs, is distinguished by its tendency to abbreviations (for example, “comp” - computer, “inet” - Internet) and jargon (for example, “LOL” in English laughing out loud - “laughed loudly” - this is how they comment on what very funny things).

In addition to special words and expressions, the language of communication on the Internet also includes special icons - emoticons, which reflect your facial expression, gestures, actions or mood. Using them, you need to clearly understand the meaning of a particular sign, and also be sure that your interlocutor knows it. Otherwise, firstly, he may think that you are littering your speech with incomprehensible brackets and squiggles, and secondly, he may confuse the meanings and decide that what is happening to you is not at all what was meant.

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