Family life is full not only of joys and difficulties, but also of unexpected “surprises” in the behavior and attitude of partners. Often, the reproaches of the other half are quite justified, and then they hurt quite strongly, because the man himself realizes that he is not entirely right about something.
However, situations are not so rare when a woman turns into a real “saw”, without having objective reasons for this, conscious of the man. Of course, if a wife constantly nags her husband, he has no choice but to try to protect his own psyche.
What does “sawing” mean?
Before starting the fight against such a phenomenon as “gaps” of the male brain, it would be nice to understand what it is and why it appears. First you need to figure out what it is - a “drinking” wife.
How does a man influence other people and the world around him as a whole? By force. Both intellectual and physical strength. Some representatives of this half of humanity do not disdain to influence the weaker ones in this way - women and children. This feature of influencing others in order to achieve something from them is genetic. Once upon a time, a man obtained food, protected his home and seized various material assets from his neighbors using physical force.
A woman is deprived of such an opportunity from the very beginning. Even the physically strongest woman is still weaker than a man. Accordingly, nature has endowed the fair sex with other qualities through which women influence their loved ones and others. That is, they affect on an emotional level and directly on the minds of men. As in cases of men using violence against weaker people, including members of their own families, in situations where a wife constantly “nags” her husband, we are talking about abuse of natural characteristics.
Simply put, a man hits, a woman nags. These are absolutely similar phenomena, each of which is a reason to contact a family psychologist.
How to inspire a man
To start inspiring a man, it is important to forget about shouting, reproaches, commands and orders. All you need is affection, love and respect. Inspiration is impossible without naturalness, lightness and play.
In family relationships, a woman can make a man both successful and unsuccessful. If she constantly “nags” him, showers him with curses, is dissatisfied with his actions, then by doing this she destroys her husband psychologically, making him a weak and weak-willed person. As a result, the husband will not only not strive for success and good earnings, but will also lose incentive in the activities that he is currently engaged in.
For a representative of the stronger sex to be successful and believe in herself, a woman should pay attention to the following recommendations:
- you need to believe in him yourself and support your husband in gaining self-confidence;
- help my husband find the type of activity that is most suitable for him. Minding your own business is unlikely to lead to good income;
- behave like a real woman, fulfill your responsibilities in the family and do not strive for leadership, since this can also make a man weak.
Why you shouldn’t be offended by a man: 5 situations
The main inspirer of the stronger sex is a woman. Without it, a man does not try to earn more, since he does not need as many things as a woman. For men, in this regard, everything is much simpler. Together with his wife, who does not “nag” him, but rather contributes to his success, he becomes more enterprising and sooner gets richer. A woman is able to surround her beloved man with the energy of love, care and warmth, which he, in turn, transforms into prosperity, success and wealth.
Why do women do this? Objective reasons
In order to understand why a charming creature, ready to follow her loved one to the ends of the earth over hot coals, suddenly turns into an object from a horror film and brings her husband to nervous exhaustion, you need to figure out whether the woman has objective reasons for such unpleasant behavior.
Men, however, like women, often do not see their own shortcomings. Probably the most common example is that after work a woman picks up her child from kindergarten, goes into the store with him, and stands at the stove. What is a man doing? After work, he drinks a couple of beers at a bar with friends, goes to the store for a “one and a half to go”, collapses on the sofa or sits down at the computer, periodically asking when dinner is. Of course, everyday events can develop differently.
The point is that a woman has a completely objective reason to “nag” her precious one. Of course, she literally cannot do this. And what does the woman do? It begins to “eat the brain.”
“He left me” or “we broke up”?
Agree that how you experience your breakup depends on your perception. “If you say “he abandoned me, he left me for someone else,” then this is clearly the perception of a victim and an abandoned toy, and as a result, you experience helplessness and resentment,” says psychologist and coach Liliya Levitskaya
. “If you say to yourself, ‘It didn’t work out for us, we broke up,’ then this is a completely different formulation of the question.”
According to the psychologist, the departure of one person from a couple is always a consequence of a disease in the system, which means something important was either missed from the very beginning or did not work out in the process, and this is already a reason for serious reflection. It is needed in order to differentiate responsibility, to understand yourself and him. And experience the pain, and as a result, first let go, and then, after some time, build new relationships without the burden of old grievances.”
During the experience, it will be important to see how you chose each other, whether you were real in the relationship, and whether it was really good for the two of you in this relationship. After all, the stamp in the passport is only the very beginning of the project, and this project can either succeed or fail, this is normal. For everything to work out, the contribution and desire of both is important.
“If it’s difficult to cope on your own, then it’s better to turn to a specialist in order to talk through your pain and understand your experience, free yourself from unnecessary things and allow yourself to continue to be happy,” says the coach.
Tips for men to quickly improve relationships
Paradoxical as it may seem, quite often in order for the “drinking” wife to again become the angel with whom a man once fell in love, you just need to get up from the couch or take a break from the computer, fix a leaking faucet, play with the child, buy a bouquet of flowers or at least come home immediately after work.
That is, you need to start the fight for your own comfortable existence in the house and a healthy microclimate in the family with an adequate assessment of yourself. You should also rummage through your memory. Perhaps the wife more than once tried to convey something to the man’s consciousness in a polite tone, but these attempts at communication did not produce any results? Men often say about someone that a person does not understand anything until you hit him in the face. So, “sawing” is a feminine way of “punching someone in the forehead.”
My husband drinks - what should I do? Advice from psychologist Pavel Rakov
How to live with an alcoholic and not go crazy? In fact, the wives of drunkards adapt and somehow live, or rather exist. Codependent relationships can last for years. Only life with an alcoholic leaves a heavy imprint on a woman. Constant feelings of anxiety, guilt, fatigue and negative emotions prevent her from fully enjoying and loving. Not to mention taking care of yourself, appreciating your feminine essence. Marriage to a drinking man is pure disappointment and bitterness. Tears into the pillow and promises from the faithful to improve. And how to live with an alcoholic? Why don't women leave then? What do you think? Write your opinion in the comments, the answers are completely anonymous.
Yes, the main reason: the woman is afraid that her alcoholic husband will not survive without her. He will get drunk, freeze somewhere on the street, get into trouble, die of hunger, and so on. How can you then live with this feeling of guilt? She abandoned the patient, but he could not stand it and passed away during another binge. No, I’d rather be patient,” she decides.
A woman feels sorry for an alcoholic, but not for herself. The psychology of the victim does not allow you to leave. She endures and endures. There is hope in her that the man will come to his senses, begin treatment, and stop drinking on his own. And the person doesn’t seem to be bad when he’s sober. But since living with an alcoholic husband is sometimes simply unbearable, the woman often breaks down and is in a state of constant stress. Thoughts of separation do not leave.
However, alcoholism is a drug addiction, a disease. You can’t get rid of it so easily; you need the desire of a man, his awareness of the problem and the help of a doctor. An alcoholic husband is a problem for the family. My advice from a psychologist, of course, will help you realize that you cannot subordinate your entire life to a drunkard. After all, fear and anxiety constantly live in such a family. Children are often afraid of a drunken father; annoying him again is fraught with danger. For a wife, he is like a suitcase without a handle. How to leave an alcoholic? How to decide to change the situation?
Why do women nag if there are no objective reasons?
If a wife is “sawing” her brain without having any reason for this, then this is a serious reason to seek professional help. But since it is not customary in our country to visit the offices of psychotherapists - both those working in the family area, with married couples, and others - you can try to understand the origins of what is happening on your own.
Often women completely unconsciously copy the behavior of their own mothers or grandmothers, which they observed in childhood. Often, a woman herself does not understand that she is doing something wrong, and thereby causes psychological discomfort to her chosen one. If she grew up in an atmosphere of daily sawing by her mother, her father, her grandmother, her grandfather, her father, and, possibly, her own daughter, then this model of behavior is natural for a woman. At the same time, there really are no objective reasons why such a wife “nags” her husband, and she doesn’t need them.
It is quite possible that a woman is a so-called energy vampire and provokes scandals. Some representatives of the fair sex are not able to feel comfortable without experiencing strong emotions. As a rule, these are temperamental and bright ladies who attract attention wherever they are. If such a woman lacks emotional intensity, violent passions, or at least simple attention from her husband, instead of the “queen,” a “saw” wife instantly appears. This switch in behavior occurs unconsciously. Human nature is designed in such a way that people intuitively find the fastest and easiest ways to get what they want. In this case, a woman needs strong emotions, and whether they are positive or negative does not matter. Negative emotions are much easier to evoke, and they are always experienced much more vividly.
Of course, there are other reasons that explain the behavior of women and have nothing to do with objective reality. But only a professional psychotherapist can identify them.
A woman “nags” means she loves
How often can you hear men expressing their indignation at the fact that women constantly nag them: “She blows my mind,” “I’m so tired of her nagging,” “Everything is always wrong for women,” “No matter what you do, it will be wrong.” In such cases, even the women themselves will agree with the men. When a partner is constantly dissatisfied with the actions, character traits, words and deeds of a loved one, it is so tiring that you don’t even want to return home.
A man is tired of a relationship where he is constantly being nagged. It's quite normal. In this case, there is a desire to create an alliance with a partner who will not criticize, be indignant and be constantly dissatisfied. But here’s what’s interesting: if a woman doesn’t nag, then most likely she’s indifferent.
A woman “blows the mind” of a man not because she enjoys it, but because she wants to convey to him some of her thoughts, which he, which most often happens, does not hear the first and even the second time. The woman speaks, but the man does not hear! If for the first time she speaks sweetly and with a smile on her face about her desires and expresses her opinion, then the next time her tone and behavior become more and more nervous and rude, until the man finally hears her.
The woman “nags” - and both partners are to blame for this:
- A woman cannot choose an approach to a man when he can understand her wishes the first or second time.
- But the man does not hear what the woman tells him. There are gentlemen who think that ladies don’t know what they want, or constantly say some nonsense. It turns out that the stronger sex does not hear, and the weaker sex increases its pressure, bringing the situation to the state of “brain blowing every evening.”
A woman “nags” only the man she loves. If she felt indifference, she would “blow the brains” of someone else - someone who is actually interesting to her. There are families where wives do not quarrel with their husbands at all. Most often, in such families, partners already have other loved ones. And they are together only for the sake of children or for status.
Do you really only need to “nag” when you love? No. It is advisable for a woman to talk calmly and rationally with her partner. But a response is also needed from the man. If he begins to hear and take into account the words of his companion, then there will be no reason for sawing. After all, a woman “blows her mind” only because a man doesn’t hear her. This is just a way to get your point across when calm and friendly conversations on such topics do not bring results. If a man does not hear when a woman calmly talks about her desires, then he himself provokes a situation of “sawing.” This problem needs to be solved by both:
- A man should learn to hear a woman when she talks to him, expresses an opinion, talks about her desires.
- And a woman needs to look for suitable words that will be understandable to her partner.
What else do wives nag about? Social reasons
Quite often from men who are dissatisfied with the behavior and attitude of their spouses, you can hear the following phrase: “My wife nags me that I don’t earn enough.” The woman’s motivation in this case is not at all as clear and simple as the man understands it.
The easiest way to understand those women who are tormented by envy. This phenomenon is akin to how men envy the vibrant and varied sex life in marriage, which their friends talk about over a glass or two in bars. And it would occur to a very rare man to ask his boasting friend a question about why he then does not run headlong to his loving wife, but chills in the company of friends. Women, in the same way, “with their ears hanging and their jaws dropping,” listen to their friends and envy them. Coming home after such bachelorette parties, the lady begins to “nag” her husband with the goal that he should be no worse than her friends’ husbands.
It is also easy to understand a woman’s envy of the material wealth of others that she sees. For example, the neighbors bought a new car, and at work someone got a fashionable long fur coat. And she wants it too, but she doesn’t have enough money. This dissonance in the psyche, caused by the inability to possess what others have, leads to sawing.
From denial to acceptance
According to psychologist, psychoanalyst Dmitry Neshchadim
, first you need to decide: is your relationship over or have you decided to wait for your husband to return back? “In the second case, it means that you choose to be in limbo, you give the key to your heart in his breast pocket. In other words, you are in his power, and there is practically nothing you can do here,” says the psychologist. – If you decide to end the relationship, then it will be a difficult and painful path. But by moving along it, you have a chance to find new meaning in life.”
What needs to be done to start this movement? According to the psychoanalyst, first of all, you need to determine the goal and draw a map of this movement. You can literally draw it with your hands and paints, or at least visualize all the stages for yourself.
The goal is to let go of your husband and open yourself to a new life. The road map will look something like this: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
- Negation.
According to Dmitry Neshchadim, it is completely normal to deny this in the first moments of your husband’s departure. It will seem to you that he will return and you will see him in everyone you meet (the image of a ghost). - Anger.
Then it is natural that you will begin to be angry with the deceased, just as one is often angry with the deceased who left his family without a breadwinner (the image of mourners at a funeral). - Bargain.
After some time, a bargaining with God (or with the Universe, with fate) may arise, where thoughts of a magical exchange for the return of the spouse will come (the image of a woman praying on her knees). - Depression.
The biggest part of the path will be depression, where the world will plunge into sadness, and you will not see the point of further path (image of a woman curled up into a snail on the bed). In this area, outside support and assistance is especially needed. - Adoption.
And at the end of the journey you will be able to see a new dawn in life again (the image of a girl sitting on the beach and watching the sunrise).
This movement towards liberation and acceptance, according to the psychologist, can take from a year to a year and a half if you don’t get stuck somewhere along the way. Naturally, at some moments you may return to sections of the path that you have already covered, but after that you will begin to move forward again. The process of movement itself is important.
“The easiest thing to do during this period is to find an understanding and sensitive psychologist who will help you go through all these areas together,” says Dmitry Neshchadim. – And also don’t neglect your health. Loss is a stress that can poison the body with stress metabolites (toxins). They will need to be removed through sweat, tears, etc. Any sport and active lifestyle that you prefer will do.
Do wives “nag” with good intentions?
It is much more difficult to understand wives who nag their husbands consciously and with exclusively “good” intentions. The “saw” wife in this case acts, although using intuitive methods, but very thoughtfully. She does this because she is absolutely sure that her husband needs constant stimulation.
Moreover, for such a saw-muse it is absolutely not important what exactly to stimulate. This type of woman believes that a person always needs to be pushed, otherwise he will not achieve anything. As a rule, these ladies are very ambitious and status is extremely important to them. By sawing, they usually achieve the promotion of their spouse up the career ladder.
What to do if your wife constantly nags - tactics: support
If the first method does not help, go to the second. Every representative of the fair sex needs protection and support. Women strive to be charming and beautiful, tormenting themselves with grueling diets and exercise in the gym in order to achieve results. To help your chosen one achieve her goals, support her - pick up the children from kindergarten or school, do homework, cook dinner, or just pick her up from work. Give her a reserve of free time that she can spend on herself and her preferences. While your chosen one is on a diet, find words to support her, convince her of irresistibility, and help her cope with a lack of calories and a bad mood. In any situation, learn to support your spouse, helping her share the heavy burden of everyday life, the woman will begin to nag you less and show her displeasure.
Being a caring and attentive man does not mean that you are henpecked
What to do?
Not only for the spiritual comfort of the spouse, but also for the formation of the personal qualities of the children, a situation when a wife “nags” her husband is dangerous. What to do in this case? How to return a warm, spiritual atmosphere to your own home? Unfortunately, few men think about these questions. Most of them simply find an outlet outside their home walls. Moreover, these are not necessarily intimate relationships; much more often, men who have been married to their wives simply spend maximum time with friends or completely devote themselves to hobbies, work, or some other activity that can become a reason not to come home.
This is completely understandable behavior and is the easiest way to maintain your own mental comfort. However, it does not solve the problem, but only aggravates it.
Therefore, if you want to change your wife’s behavior, you shouldn’t do this, otherwise you will end up with an eternal drinking wife next to you in life. What should I do? You need to determine the type of sawing, understand what caused it, and act based on this.
Rehabilitation of a drinking woman
Considering the fact that the causes of female alcoholism are often psychological, a very important stage in a woman’s full recovery is psychological rehabilitation. This process takes a lot of time and will require a lot of effort, but in the process of rehabilitation, new value systems are formed in a woman’s life.
Thus, a person himself comes to the desire to start a new life and return to society. At the same time, specialists influence the human psyche through feelings of guilt, as well as through other feelings and emotions. In terms of time, socialization and rehabilitation take a different period for each woman, and this is an individual issue - it depends on certain characteristics of the body and psyche.
If a woman refuses treatment, then the intervention method helps - when the advice of a psychologist in a clinic or at home is aimed at convincing a person to make a decision about treatment in a hospital. Our rehabilitation center provides high-quality coding followed by full rehabilitation of women who abuse alcohol. Don't leave your loved ones in trouble! Call for a consultation now, and have specialists come to your home, or arrange a consultation in a clinic.
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Actions when “sawing” for objective reasons
It is more difficult for a man to determine the objective reasons for his wife’s behavior than to get rid of them. Therefore, you should not guess what specific male imperfections brought your wife to the state of saw, you just need to talk to her.
There is no need to fear a scandal. Women who are concerned about specific actions or the lack thereof, as a rule, clearly voice in confidential conversations what they want to receive from their husbands. Of course, having heard why your wife nags all the time, you need to immediately resolve this problem. With this approach, next time the spouse will not blow her mind, but will make several attempts at a confidential conversation.
A little about men
“Men always remain children,” women say, but they do not realize what this means. It is a mistake to believe that this means that a man will always be frivolous, childish and stupid, never thinks about anything serious, and thinks only about himself.
In reality, this means that a man’s psychology is designed in such a way that he can be “educated.” Depending on changing environmental conditions, a man begins to adapt to the situation, find a point of balance and comfort, that is, behave in such a way as to minimize external stimuli. If his woman becomes such an irritant, the man seeks to minimize contact with her.
You should not think that such an attitude towards life is a manifestation of selfishness. This is inherent in the psyche of a man, back in ancient times, when the main role of a man was to obtain food, protect housing and other external functions, respectively, the internal sphere of life, the household (home) faded into the background.
Now the world has changed somewhat compared to ancient times. A man no longer hunts mammoths, his prey is a salary, and his protection is the support of the home and the woman in raising children. However, the man’s psyche has not undergone significant changes.
Probably everyone knows that if a child is raised strictly, not allowed to take initiative and punished for any attempt to do something, he will grow up spineless. The same situation applies to men. If a man is constantly told that everything he does is wrong, he will lose the desire to do anything. This is especially true for his woman, since it is her opinion that is the most important person for a man.
Actions for unconscious “sawing”
If a wife nags her husband only because she is not familiar with another model of behavior in the family, professional help from a psychologist may be needed. Of course, this is not always possible. You can try to cope with the problem yourself, but it will require considerable patience, tact and some cunning.
First, you should take a closer look at your wife’s mother and how the woman behaves. If the wife copies her mother, then it is worth looking for those moments that irritate the spouse in the parent. To do this, it is enough to visit your wife’s parents often and never tire of praising your mother-in-law, holding her up as an example to your wife. This should be done in private, under no circumstances visiting your parents. Sooner or later, the wife will “explode” and dump a lot of information about her mother on the man. At this moment, you need to show maximum attention and remember what the wife does not like about her mother-in-law.
After the next visit to your parents, you need to thoughtfully tell your wife that she was right. In one thing, you don’t need to use all your trump cards at once. A woman will definitely respond to this message. The topic should be developed and casually noticed that the mother-in-law nags the wife’s father. At the same time, you must definitely say: “How lucky you are that you didn’t drink.” It doesn’t matter that this is not the case, we must not forget that the woman does not realize the error of her behavior. After several such conversations, the wife will definitely think about whether she is so different from her mother. And when he thinks about it, he realizes that he is behaving in exactly the same way. Realizing this, most women make incredible efforts to change their behavior.
In psychology, this technique is called manipulation. Its essence is that a person is led to the desired action, and he feels confident that he is doing everything independently and according to his personal desire.
A quarrel is the unity of spouses
If spouses do not quarrel, then they have nothing to talk about. As it turns out, a quarrel is a simple confrontation of two opinions. And it becomes strange if the spouses have complete idyll and mutual understanding. Each partner lived their own unique, problematic life before meeting their soulmate. Each had their own disappointments and betrayals, which forced them to change their fairy-tale ideas about love and stop completely believing the opposite sex. Moreover, each person has his own worldview, which cannot completely coincide with the worldview of other people.
If spouses have different points of view and want to solve a problem together, then they quarrel. This is quite natural and normal, since initially each of the partners considers their opinion to be the only correct one. First, you want to defend your opinion, convince your loved one, make him think the same way as you. But then humility sets in, and the partners look for ways out of the situation, taking into account both opinions and sometimes limiting each other in some ways.
But how can you evaluate a situation when partners have opposing opinions, but absolutely do not try to come to a common decision? It turns out that each of them is going to solve the problem as they see fit, without the participation and cooperation of their other half. There is one problem, but each partner is trying to solve it in his own way. Thus, there is no quarrel, but the problem itself is not solved, since the partners each live in their own world.
According to statistics, couples in which there are no quarrels break up faster than those unions where men and women quarrel. This is not surprising, since a quarrel is the desire of partners to resolve the same issue together. And if there is no quarrel, this indicates that the partners do not care what their loved ones think about this, since they will solve the problem themselves. Acting alone, there is no cooperation. But relationships are precisely cooperation.
Sawing actions due to lack of emotions
Another reason why a wife nags her husband is simple boredom and a lack of passion in the relationship. If this is true for your family, solving the problem will not be difficult. You should simply give your wife what she wants, that is, attention, passion, ardor, romance, and so on.
Often you won’t have to perform “feats”. As a rule, a tender look, a kiss in the morning, a bouquet of flowers in the evening and invitations to dates are enough. Even such a banality as a date on the street, somewhere in a park, works wonders. After all, usually people living under the same roof do not go on dates the same as at the beginning of their relationship. Accordingly, such a pastime will stir up a lot of memories and revive fading feelings. That is, what the woman nagged the man will happen for.
If the reason is envy of friends
The most common mistake husbands make is trying to bring their girlfriends to light. In such attempts, an envious woman sees only the man’s excuses for his failure and “boils” even more.
The simplest thing is to wait out the crisis. As soon as the wife’s attention switches to something else, she will forget that her friends’ husbands are ideal, and she herself has nothing to boast about. Another option is to do something that your wife can brag about. For example, find out where her friends with “ideal” husbands most often go, and order a billboard in this place with a photo of their spouse and a declaration of love. There will be no limit to a woman's happiness.
The only thing you shouldn't do is try to start earning more money. If a spouse “eats” her brain by talking about how her friends’ husbands endlessly buy fur coats, Mercedes, trips to the Canary Islands, and so on, then what the woman needs is not an extra few thousand rubles, but the opportunity to say with her head held high: “But here’s mine— That…"
Tip 9. Understand the essence of addiction
The husband must understand: his wife’s alcohol addiction is not so much a physical problem as a spiritual one. The bodily attachment can be removed - there are now many high-quality drugs. If your soul is empty, only God can help.
All other excuses: “I drink because I had a difficult childhood... because you don’t love me... don’t care about me...” - these are just excuses. You can carry her in your arms, but the alcoholic will go on a binge because she wants to do it. Until the emptiness in the soul is filled, periods of enlightenment will become shorter, periods of heavy drinking will become longer.
That is why our rehabilitation center, which operates under the Narco-Net program, is an ideal option. We pray for a drunken alcoholic, tell the woman about God, and involve her in ministries. An alcoholic learns to communicate with sober people, share and listen to advice, take responsibility for her actions... As she stays in the center, the spiritual emptiness is filled, and the addict can say “no to alcohol.”
Actions when “sawing” due to envy of the material values of others
You should not try to suggest that a woman should not look at what her neighbors or acquaintances have. This will only upset her and will not solve the behavior problem at all, but will rather make it worse.
Moreover, you should not try to acquire everything that your spouse craves. We need to give her an alternative option. That is, if a wife nags because a neighbor has a fur coat and she doesn’t, then you should buy something that the woman living behind the wall does not have. It’s easy to determine this - you need to ask your wife and offer her to buy something from the above.
How to stop nagging?
Psychologists offer a number of tips for representatives of the fairer sex who are determined to stop the “sawing” process:
- try to accept your husband as he is;
- often call your spouse “sweet,” “strong,” “courageous,” etc.;
- don’t make a scandal over every little thing, sometimes you should restrain yourself and remain silent;
- always thank a man for good deeds towards you;
- When discussing your spouse's negative behavior, listen rather than talk;
- do not force him to obey you unquestioningly.
Why is it not necessary to nag a man? Because as a result of this, you will either get henpecked, which you are unlikely to like, or your husband will begin to hurt you, for example, cheat on you or try to find another woman. Remember that nagging can lead to a break in the relationship.
6 things men value most in relationships
How to resist sawing with good intentions?
It is difficult to resist the saw muse. Such a woman is absolutely convinced that she is right. She knows exactly what she wants and does everything to achieve it.
As a rule, conversations about how her behavior causes mental discomfort are unsuccessful. The only effective way to fight is practice. A woman “nags” - a man lies down on the sofa, sits down at the computer, takes sick leave during a crucial period and sabotages his own career in every possible way. The woman praises and smiles - the man immediately plunges into work and achieves real success in the shortest possible time.
The man's position should be tough. All actions must be performed consistently, stopping the slightest attempts at sawing with your behavior. You shouldn’t allow yourself any concessions, because the saw-muse has the mentality of a crocodile. As soon as a man shows softness, he will again be faced with the endless “eating away” of his own brain.
Tip 1. Don’t argue with an alcoholic
The wife herself knows what she is doing is bad. If you yell at her, she will only shut down, feeling unimportant. And, in order to drown out this feeling, he will drink with friends or on the sly.
Don't shout, forget about swearing. Speak kindly to a binge alcoholic. Discuss various problems, financial issues with her, ask for her opinion. Provide her with moral support, do not threaten her with divorce.
This will make the binge drinker feel that you are interested in her opinion. Then she will listen to requests, want to quit alcohol, and go to rehabilitation.
