What should a girl be able to do at 10 years old: development, help around the house, games, books

• September 13, 2018
• Child psychology
• Yulia Shamshurina

Raising a ten-year-old is not an easy task. Often parents tend to go to two extremes: either demand too much from the child, or demand too little. How can you learn to sensibly assess your child’s capabilities? For this purpose, special average requirements have been developed, focusing on which you need to raise a daughter of this age. Let's find out what a 10-year-old girl should be able to do according to them, as well as what level of physical development is considered normal for her.

This alluring and frightening number “10”

The candles on the birthday cake barely have time to go out when the parents of their ten-year-old daughter begin to notice dramatic changes in her. And this is not only the onset of puberty, the appearance of breasts and other secondary sexual characteristics, but also changes in character.

At this age, girls often become hot-tempered, begin to rebel and hide things from their parents. Why is that? The fact is that not only the body of yesterday’s baby gradually turns from a child’s to a girl’s, but also her psyche. The hormonal system is under enormous stress and the girl herself is not always aware of what is happening to her. She may not even understand why she begins to react more subtly to everything, cry for no apparent reason, or show unmotivated aggression.

As a rule, it is at the age of 10 (these are average indicators, it can happen either earlier or later) that the child begins to recognize himself as a separate person. The daughter notices that she may like things that her parents are not happy with. And mom and dad themselves no longer seem all-knowing and infallible. A kind of debunking of the parental cult is taking place and it is difficult for both sides to survive. It may be difficult for a girl to accept that mom and dad are not as good, smart, rich, or caring as other parents. At the same time, it may not be easy for them to come to terms with the baby’s increasing independence.

At this age, their task is to use all means to help their ten-year-old daughter accept the changes that are happening to her body and psyche. In addition, it is important to begin to instill in the girl the awareness that with new rights and opportunities (which this age brings) comes new responsibility. The balance of these two scales is the key to the formation of an independent and self-sufficient personality, which is what every caring parent wants for their child.

Under 18: change and talk

But in reality, parents rarely come to their senses so early - more often we are faced with the need to rebuild relationships with teenagers. And this happens not at twelve or thirteen years old, while he is still very dependent on us, but at sixteen or seventeen, when a young man is ready to burn bridges, and good relationships become more important to you than to him. In such a situation, a simple change in behavior is more likely to alert him than to lead to positive changes.

It’s important to start talking here. Talk about your feelings, your willingness to understand and hear

And not only talk, but also prove your new position with real actions.

At the same time, it is still important to remain in this situation as a parent who is more experienced and wiser. During adolescence, it is more important than ever to have support at home, support and competent advice.

The son or daughter still needs a strong parent; they cannot yet go through life on their own, although they are internally ready for this.

It happens that the situation has reached a dead end, any communication is extremely emotionally charged, and long conversations with research into the positions of the parties are simply impossible. In this case, the parent will need a lot of courage and patience.

You also need to be prepared for the fact that the first step is taken by the parent who is older and stronger. After all, the initiative in parent-child relationships is always on the side of the parent; it is he who determines their tone at any age.

Sex education

If for some reason, before reaching the age of ten, a conversation “about this” has not taken place, the omission should be urgently corrected. Having noticed changes in his body, the child will still know what is happening to him. But the correct acceptance of it depends on who, how and under what conditions this information is presented. So, putting aside false, stupid shame, it’s worth talking gently with your daughter about her gradual transformation into a woman.

It is best for this conversation to take place between the girl and her mother. If there is none, then with some other woman (grandmother, aunt, nanny, older sister, stepmother, etc.). The main thing is that the baby trusts her and her opinion.

In addition to the story, it is worth letting the girl watch some educational film/cartoon about puberty. Fortunately, today there is plenty to choose from among both foreign and domestic film products.

If desired, you can provide relevant literature to read. Moreover, such publications are adapted for different ages. So it’s not difficult to choose specialized books for 10-year-old girls, which clearly explain what’s happening to them and the upcoming changes.

As a rule, the first menstruation appears at the age of 11-13. However, in rare cases, they can also occur in ten-year-olds. Therefore, it is worth clearly explaining to your daughter what it is and how to behave on such days. Considering that “red” days can begin suddenly, outside the home or on a trip, it is worth discussing hygiene rules with the girl in advance and choosing the appropriate products. This preparation will help her cope with the problem herself if her mother is not around when her first period begins.

Talking about puberty and sex also includes talking about contraception. It is also advisable to carry it out at the age of ten. Although teenagers, as a rule, begin their sexual life at the age of 13-17, no one can say exactly when this will happen. Therefore, to develop the right culture of sex and prevent early pregnancy, it is worth telling your daughter about the basics of contraception. And after 2-3 years it will be possible to start a more serious conversation on this topic.

Once again, it is worth emphasizing that talking about puberty is very important at this age. The normal physical, intellectual and mental development of a girl at 10 years old includes an understanding of what is happening to her and the reasons for it. Moreover, from this age, yesterday’s babies, whose ultimate dream is a doll, often begin to show interest in boys, usually older than them. And if they are not taught to correctly evaluate and respond to such feelings and the desires that follow them, but simply say something like: “sex is evil” or “you are still too young and don’t understand anything about all this” - the child may begin to overindulge. be interested in this issue. If only out of a sense of protest and desire to prove one’s own maturity.

Diagnostics

A 10-year-old child, whose psychological diagnosis is necessarily carried out according to a planned schedule in educational institutions, must have a correct attitude towards the learning process. There is a whole range of diagnostic tests that determine the presence of motivation to learn and indicate gaps or possible errors. In addition, psychologists evaluate personality traits and also analyze interpersonal relationships in a group of teenagers.

Motivation for learning

One of the most popular methods is the diagnosis of learning motivation. The purpose of common diagnostics is to assess cognitive activity and achievement motivation. In addition, processing the results allows you to detect possible negative feelings that arise in relation to learning. These are feelings such as anxiety or anger.

Diagnostic characteristics:

• age range from 9 to 14 years;
• form: written survey;
• rating on a scale from 1 to 4 points;
• questionnaire of 40 questions;
• limited operating time.

After processing the results, the points are summed up and calculated using a special formula.

Diagnosis of learning motivation is one of the popular psychological diagnostics, which involves a 10-11 year old child studying at school.

As a result, the level of learning motivation is set:

• First level. This is productive motivation with pronounced cognitive involvement.
• Second level . Productive motivation with a positive attitude towards the teacher. The second level expresses a generally accepted social norm.
• Third level . An average indicator characterized by a decrease in motivation for learning.
• Fourth level . Reduced motivation with elements of denial of the learning process.
• Fifth level. This is a sharply negative attitude towards learning.

Cognitive development

One of the options for characterizing cognitive development was the classical method of comprehensive assessment of a child’s attention. The technique includes completing tasks on a special form. The study participant is asked to correlate with each other the numbers that are displayed opposite the tangled lines.

The adult evaluates the logic of thinking, the correctness of the given answers, and also calculates the time spent on completing the entire task. During work, all stops of the subject must be recorded. Productivity is assessed in points, and percentages are calculated using them. Results from 70 to 98% are considered good indicators that meet the standards.

Personality properties

One of the most interesting diagnostics is the study of the personality type of a primary school student.

Psychological diagnostics of children aged 10 years includes the “Pictogram” method (author Luria). This is a variant of memory research and subsequent analysis of the characteristics of associations. The subject is asked to draw on a piece of paper using a pencil the association that has arisen with the spoken words. The word or expression is read out loud. The drawing shown on the sheet should help the subject remember it.

Researchers evaluate the results using a special catalog of samples. For analysis, different techniques are used: they compare the sizes of each picture, determine the clarity of the lines, and provide an associative series. This technique is indicated for children aged 6 to 11 years. With its help, psychologists identify personality traits and find various problems.

Interpersonal relationships

A 10-year-old child, whose psychological diagnosis includes an analysis of interpersonal relationships, belongs to the category of junior schoolchildren.

Using special tests, psychologists determine the following properties:

• communicative actions of schoolchildren;
• communicative speech actions;
• sociometric status of students.

Various options are used for diagnosis. Below is the most common method used in sociometry. This test is given to a specific group or whole class. Each of the children needs to name the surnames or names of those whom he chooses in the proposed situation. Schoolchildren are asked to determine with whom he would go to the cinema, who he would prefer as a neighbor during a test, and so on.

After processing the data, where the position of each survey participant is determined, a map of group differentiation is drawn up. It allows you to understand how children communicate outside of school hours. Psychologists identify leaders, preferred children, and isolated children. Each group is worked separately as needed.

Indicators of group cohesion using the Seashore method are a technique based on the study of the psychological climate in a team. Group cohesion is determined by analyzing responses to 5 questions. Questions are voiced in advance and given time to think. The answer to each question is worth a certain number of points. The maximum score is 19, the minimum threshold is 5 points. This technique falls into the category of sociometric index tests and allows you to understand how comfortable the climate within the group remains.

Physiological development

This age is very deceptive. It often happens that girls outwardly resemble teenagers, but in terms of intellectual and psychological development they can still remain children. Because of this, parents often worry whether their child is falling behind or, conversely, growing too quickly.

To understand this, it is worth comparing the daughter’s development with the average norms that are typical for her age.

The first thing you should know is how much a girl should weigh at 10 years old. This parameter is especially important, since underweight or excess weight can become symptoms of serious diseases. For example, worms or diabetes.

It is considered normal when a ten-year-old weighs between 27.7 and 34.9 kg. If deviations from these indicators are 0.5-1 kg, do not panic. This can be attributed to the individual developmental characteristics of the child. If more, then you should see a doctor. There is no need to immediately get scared and tune in to the negative. Extra/missing kilograms may simply be a consequence of a vacation spent with an overly hospitable grandmother in the village or too active sports activities.

Having found out how much a girl should weigh at 10 years old, you should pay attention to her height. On average, it should range from 134.3 to 142.9 cm. The normal deviation is 5-7 cm in any direction.

Another physical parameter that people pay attention to is the size of their head circumference. It should be 51.5 - 54.1 cm.

Otherwise, everything is individual. The size of the chest, waist and hips at this age directly depends on the onset of puberty and the speed of its development. At the age of ten, a daughter may begin to grow breasts, hair under her arms and in her groin. However, these signs may not appear right now, but will make themselves felt at 11, 12 or 13 years of age.

To sum it up...

The phrase I mention constantly is love your children. Just the way they are. And help them develop and become better. I’m not revealing anything new or supernatural, but I’m just talking about something that for some reason many people forget about or simply don’t pay enough attention to. Communicate with your child openly, talk about what you were like at his age - trust in relationships and your love means so much to him! Watch how the child changes, his character, values ​​and support, direct his energy in the right direction

And everything will be fine. 10-11 years is an important time in the life of every child; how this period goes depends on what he will be like as a teenager. Don't miss the moment and be happy!

Intellectual and mental development

This age is one of the milestones. It is believed that it is during this period that the child’s intellectual maturation begins. However, as with sexual intercourse, it may be delayed a little.

Quite often, at the age of 10, a girl is expected to read more complex literature that goes beyond the school curriculum, and also to have an idea about her future profession. But all these demands are not always healthy. Yes, many ten-year-olds indeed seem to be starting to think like adults. Possessors of extraordinary abilities at this age, they can read Nietzsche in the original and talk about the fate of the world. However, their knowledge is not based on actual life experience. They are not comprehended or felt. So in practice, it’s the same as a verse learned by heart, nothing more. Moreover, the girls themselves may not even understand that they are not adults, but are simply playing at them.

The task of parents is to show tact and firmness. In the first case, do not criticize unnecessarily arrogant daughters, who are seriously capable of starting to teach life lessons to dad, mom and even grandparents. In the second, put the girl in her place if her “games” go beyond the bounds of reason.

For this category of early and smart people, the most important thing is to teach their daughter to sensibly evaluate herself. One of the easiest ways is tests for 10-year-old girls. They can be aimed both at testing intellectual abilities or knowledge in certain areas (school curriculum, literature, music, natural sciences), and at analyzing character and the level of formation of social skills (the ability to communicate with peers and adults).

Similar tests for 10-year-old girls can be found in specialized literature or asked from a school psychologist. By the way, it would be nice to discuss their results with him. Although in the post-Soviet space the tradition of turning to such a specialist is still in its infancy, it should not be neglected. Moreover, sometimes he is able to notice and help correct those flaws in the child’s psychological development that the parents themselves do not see.

At the other extreme for girls of this age is “delayed maturation,” which is mistaken for developmental delay. Its essence is that the child is comfortable remaining in the position he is. Not wanting to change anything and take on additional responsibility, the girl deliberately “sabotages” her intellectual development. And not always consciously.

Although seemingly harmless, this problem can have serious consequences. After all, having “refused to grow up,” a ten-year-old later turns out to be unadapted to life and will have to catch up at an accelerated pace, which can lead to many mental disorders, as well as depression.

As a rule, simply talking in the event of such “sabotage” is ineffective. Therefore, it is best to slowly develop in a girl practical skills characteristic of her age. This may cause resistance at first. It will be possible to overcome it gradually, increasing the area of ​​her personal responsibility (range of responsibilities).

Warning signs for parents

Be attentive to your children, they often cry for help without noticing it themselves. Pay attention to:

1. Self-harm. Children can bite their nails, cuticles, cut their skin, and become involved in dangerous forms of entertainment. All this indicates internal pain that the child is experiencing and is trying to drown out at least a little with the help of physical pain.
2. Bad habits. If a child “smoked behind garages” with friends and showed his maturity, this is, of course, bad, but not scary. But if you notice that your child drinks alcohol, smokes or uses drugs not for the purpose of socializing, immediately seek help from specialists
3. Lack of any hobby. If a child, who due to his age should be active and cheerful, does not have a hobby, but instead is in apathy and spends the whole day in the apartment, this is also a serious reason to look for the reason for such a loss of strength.
4. Demonstrative failure. Children may begin to deliberately receive bad grades and comments from teachers in order to attract the attention of their parents. After all, a negative reaction is also a reaction. Start paying positive attention to your children, and you will notice how the need for bad grades will go away on its own.
5. Loneliness. The child has no friends, he is alone almost all the time. Pay attention to this - as a rule, the problem is not with classmates. Most likely, the child lacks the skills to build friendships. This is quite easy to correct. If bullying is the basis of loneliness, immediately notify the school administration and begin active efforts to save the child.
6. Lack of empathy . If you notice that your child is cruel to animals or younger children, that he does not show sympathy and empathy for others, contact a specialist. All these are signs of more serious mental disorders, including schizophrenia.

Books for girls 10 years old

Reading is one of the most accessible ways for a child of this age to learn about the world. Unlike watching movies/cartoons, this process is more beneficial.

By the age of ten, a girl should already be able to choose books from the library for extracurricular reading. At the same time, parents should complement her choice, taking into account her interests and weaknesses.

In addition to what the school curriculum requires, as well as the desires of the child himself, there are books that every ten-year-old should read.

• Literature to broaden your horizons. These are encyclopedias and publications telling about other countries and their distinctive features.
• Books about self-care. Literature about puberty and sex can also be included in this category.
• Publications dedicated to household management. Of course, forcing a 10-year-old girl to reread Home Economics (1964) from cover to cover is stupid. However, finding adapted literature on this topic is not difficult. Even if your daughter does not have to sew, knit, cook, wash, iron, etc., it is necessary to have a minimal understanding of all this. For example, in Soviet times, Sofia Mogilevskaya’s book “Girls, a book for you” was distributed, according to which our mothers, grandmothers and great-grandmothers learned the basics of housekeeping. It is still published with minor additions, and even taking into account modern realities it has not lost its relevance.

Toys for ten year olds

Even experienced adults sometimes like to play something. And for a 10-year-old girl, toys are quite natural.

However, at this age their focus should gradually change. They serve more for acquiring practical skills.

This does not mean that as soon as our daughter turns 10, we will take away her favorite doll and give her a miniature sewing machine in return. No, this transition must occur gradually. The same games with a doll should be redirected a little. For example, get your little one interested in creating an entertaining piece of jewelry for your pet, a new outfit, or even a stylish hairstyle.

In any case, some toys for 10-year-old girls should still be for fun. However, the majority should make up various sets for conducting experiments, creating jewelry, clothes, toys, etc.

Mom's influence on the proper upbringing of a girl

In the very first years of a child’s life, the closest person to him is usually his mother. She sits at home with him while his father goes to work and provides for the family. As boys grow older, they become closer to their dad, while girls remain closest to their mother. For a girl, a mother is the very first and main ideal of female beauty and femininity in general. It is not surprising that the girl wants to be like her mother in everything. From her mother, the daughter learns various feminine “wisdoms” - such as cleaning and cooking, washing, creating beautiful things, treating men.

Hygiene kits for ten-year-olds

So-called children's cosmetics are often classified as toys. In fact, for a 10-year-old girl this is no longer entertainment, but a necessity.

There are many companies specializing in the production of cosmetics for young princesses. Moreover, these are both domestic and foreign manufacturers. When choosing a set, you should carefully study the components - after all, the child’s health is at stake. His body in its developmental stage is overly susceptible to various toxic substances.

As a rule, children's cosmetics are sold in sets. If lipstick, nail polish or eye shadow seem inappropriate for a girl of this age, you should choose a set without them. It is important not to forget that at this age many babies begin to sweat, so the presence of deodorant or eau de toilette is necessary. However, like your own shower gel/soap.

Cream is not necessary for ten-year-olds. But hygienic lipstick in winter - yes. Especially if your daughter tends to lick her lips.

Computer: friend or foe

Quite often you hear the phrase: “All evil comes from computers.” Based on this opinion, many parents prohibit their children from using this device.

No matter how we feel about this device, we must admit that it has firmly entered our everyday life and not a single field of activity can do without it. Thus, computer literacy is an important component of the life of a modern person.

By the age of ten, a girl should be accustomed to the idea that such a device is neither evil nor good. It is only a tool in the hands of the user, and it depends on him whether it will bring benefit or harm.

What should a 10 year old girl be able to do on a computer?

• Use a text editor. Be able to type taking into account the rules for setting punctuation marks and paragraphs, as well as correct errors.
• Have basic skills in creating presentations (selecting and inserting pictures, commenting on them).
• Have the ability to use search engines. Be able to find the right book, movie, cartoon, article.
• Be able to use Google or any other online dictionary/translator.
• Have an understanding of computer and network security (do not give passwords to anyone, do not disclose personal information to strangers or acquaintances only through online correspondence, etc.). Scan all external connected devices and downloaded programs for viruses.

Despite the apparent independence and even responsibility, you should not be allowed to use the computer to your heart’s content. The fact is that even adults often cannot tear themselves away from this device for hours, so it is extremely naive to expect consciousness from a child. You should be allowed to use a computer (tablet, phone) no more than 2 hours a day with breaks every 30-40 minutes. All this should happen only after homework and homework are done.

Another important question that worries parents: “Which computer should I choose for a 10-year-old girl?” In this matter, everything is individual. However, if you have a place to put a computer, it is better to choose it rather than a laptop or tablet. This device will be easier to repair and improve in the future. In addition, it is more durable and functional.

As for the tablet, if the child already has a fairly powerful phone and computer, then this device will be clearly superfluous.

In any case, remember that a ten-year-old is still a child and all such adult devices are perceived by her as toys. So you can’t do without healthy, unobtrusive control.

Responsibilities of a teenager in the family

To ensure that a teenager’s responsibilities in the family do not become a source of many conflicts, you must adhere to the following rules:

• Agree with your child that he will be fully responsible for the cleanliness and order in his own room. He monitors the cleanliness himself, decides when and how to do the cleaning, and carries it out himself. When making an agreement with your teenager, do not forget to outline the scope of these “when” and “how”.
• Try to do the cleaning together (everyone cleans “their own” territory).
• Try not to order; friendly interaction is much more effective.
• Don't be shy to ask for help. Make him feel like he is helping you as an adult would.
• When necessary, gently but firmly remind your child of his responsibilities. Sometimes a teenager simply forgets about promises.
• Create a friendly atmosphere. Let the child know that, for example, cooking together will be complemented by friendly conversations.

By adolescence, a child shows a tendency to maintain cleanliness that was instilled in him since childhood, so it will not be possible to change the situation dramatically. This requires patience and understanding. If you try to negotiate with your child, then gradually he will meet you halfway.

Finance

The ability to manage one’s own funds is something that a 10-year-old girl should be able to do. In any case, this age is the time to start learning this. From this period on, it is worth giving your daughter a small amount of pocket money every week. You can also instruct her to buy her own stationery and top up her mobile phone.

When she starts to get all of this, it's time to send her to the store shopping with a list. At first it should contain no more than 2-3 points. Further more.

To the list of what a 10-year-old girl should be able to do, it is worth adding the habit of checking receipts after purchases and change, without leaving the cash register or being in the field of view of cameras. Another ten-year-old should learn that salespeople can make mistakes too. Therefore, if she was shortchanged or the wrong product was sold, you should immediately contact the culprit or the security guard. The child must learn that as a buyer, he has rights and must be ready to defend them, and not silently endure injustice.

If the girl copes with all of the above, it’s time to send her to pay utility bills. Naturally, it is too early for her to make calculations on them herself. However, it is already possible to show how they are produced.

Help around the house

Before considering what 10-year-old girls should do at home, it is worth reminding parents that their children are not slaves or free labor. So, dumping all the responsibilities at home on them, and then being surprised by poor grades at school, is dishonest.

Naturally, at this age, a daughter should already be able to take care of herself. That is, cleaning your shoes, sorting and arranging your clothes, and determining whether they need to be sent to the wash. Her responsibilities include sewing on buttons and other minor repairs.

Regarding housework, by the age of 10, a child should be taught to wash dishes, make tea/coffee, heat food on the stove and in the microwave, peel vegetables, sort and take out garbage.

Also, a ten-year-old must take part in cleaning the house. She can vacuum, wash floors and glass, and wipe off dust.

If a family has a dacha/garden, it’s time for a 10-year-old girl to help there too. It’s too early for her to dig, but she’s quite capable of harvesting and watering, weeding and other little things.

Sometimes ten-year-olds can do even more: bake pies, make jam, and do laundry not in a machine, but with their own hands. If a girl can do all this so early, great. If not, don’t rush things.

How to raise a girl correctly: general advice

It is believed that raising a girl is a more delicate process than raising a boy. After all, the female sex is weaker, more vulnerable, sensitive; girls and women trust feelings and emotions more than reason.

There is probably no need to explain in detail why such an opinion is initially biased. Even not in all traditional cultures, a woman was a secondary, weak and dependent creature: there were and are peoples in which men are considered weak and “inferior”, and women, on the contrary, represent the main “strike force”. Such are, for example, the Tuaregs (a people in North Africa), who, with such a social system, even manage to practice Islam. Even in some Arab countries, there is a clear superiority of women in all spheres, from family to government.

In modern society, at least within developed countries, for the most part there is complete equality between the male and female sexes. Women work as officials, police officers, and participate in strength sports - initially these are “male” professions. And men can do laundry, cooking, raising children; Among programmers in our time, the overwhelming majority are men, although from the very beginning this profession was considered typically female.

How is a girl raised in such a society? To this, modern psychologists say that raising a child is divided into two parts - general and special. The general part implies things that are the same for children of both sexes: this is, in particular, raising an inquisitive, thinking child, responsible for his actions and words, and observing the rules of personal hygiene. But the special part is one that takes into account the gender characteristics of the child; In this part, the upbringing of a girl and the upbringing of a boy will differ markedly in content.

As for the “general” part, here, first of all, it is necessary to give the child the opportunity to express himself. There should be no strict prohibitions in upbringing; the child should be protected only from situations that could be harmful to his health. At the same time, many believe that girls are more obedient than boys, it is easier to negotiate with them, and it is easier to convince them to do what their parents want. This is a rather controversial statement, because there are many girls who show self-will no less diligently than boys. But still, in such cases, it is customary to say that the girl has “obviously boyish” behavior. The mistake here is made by parents who are trying to re-educate their daughter, to make her more flexible, quiet and meek - the way a “real girl” should be. In other words, such parents believe that nature itself made a mistake, and the “image of a girl” created by superstitious people in ancient times is the ultimate truth. A girl must show her personality, no matter how unconventional it may seem.

In addition, it is important to introduce a child to work at an early age. This is not only the notorious housework (cleaning, washing dishes, etc.), but also hobbies. Traditionally, girls were characterized by a passion for needlework; in our time, it is designed to develop an aesthetic sense, and initially such a hobby had practical value: what a girl knits and sews may be the only clothing for her, her husband and children. Another hobby is cooking. By the way, many note that today fewer and fewer girls have such hobbies from childhood: in a practical sense, this is no longer necessary, and for self-expression and “creating beauty” there are more modern and relevant types of art.

It is also important to take care of the girl’s physical development and health. Many mothers feel too sorry for their daughters and keep them warm and protect them from “excessive” stress. The consequences of such upbringing are excess weight, weak immune system, undeveloped figure, and awkwardness. Smart mothers strengthen their daughters from the very beginning. Particular attention should be paid to sports, of which there are many types for girls: gymnastics, roller skating, figure skating, tennis, running, etc. At the same time, it is important for a girl to develop not physical strength, but a beautiful figure, flexibility and grace. If you choose “male” sports, the girl’s appearance will acquire certain masculine traits, and this may not appeal to all representatives of the “stronger sex.” But again - the last word should remain only with the girl; if she chooses swimming or boxing, she should not be dissuaded or condemned.

The girl must be beautiful. Of course, if she wants it herself. Of course, many girls want to be beautiful, and parents should constantly tell them how beautiful they are. However, beauty does not appear by itself; it must be created and maintained. In this regard, parents should help the girl develop certain useful habits: washing her face in the mornings and evenings, brushing her teeth, making her bed in the morning. Also, the girl should understand that walking around the house in a nightgown is unsightly.

The girl should be taught how to use cosmetics. It is highly desirable if initiation into it takes place no earlier than the age of twelve. The girl must understand that cosmetics do not need to be applied in thick layers - they should only emphasize the natural beauty of the face. Properly selected and applied cosmetics is an art.

In addition to cosmetics, the girl should be taught the art of choosing suitable clothes. She should be able to choose a beautiful style and a good combination of colors. Knowing how to dress is necessary not only in the sense of creating beauty: it will protect the girl from making impulsive clothing purchases.

A real “little lady” must know the rules of etiquette - behavior at the table, in public places, in transport. However, in the modern world, etiquette is a controversial concept; It may happen that “good manners” taken from old textbooks and manuals will look out of place today.

Care for younger children

Ten-year-olds are already able to help their mother or other relatives care for babies. For example: change a diaper, take the stroller for a walk in the yard, prepare formula and bottle feed. However, this assistance should not become unduly burdensome. The girl is still a child herself, and she needs personal time. And making her a free, reliable nanny will only harm her.

In the case of older children, 3-7 years old, a ten-year-old can easily drive and pick them up from kindergarten (if it is nearby), as well as play with them on the street and help with homework. And again, such help should not take away personal time (2-4 hours) and the opportunity to get enough sleep, eat, study, etc.

Pets

To conclude our discussion of what a 10-year-old girl should do, it’s worth talking about pets. At this age, the baby is already able to fully take care of a pet on her own. This is not only feeding and cleaning, but also walking and training. Regarding the latter, sometimes you need the help of an adult or professional. Otherwise, the ten-year-old must understand that if she wants to have an animal, then it will be her complete personal responsibility.

The role of parents in this case is to buy food and filler, and accompany the child and the animal to the veterinarian. If a girl does not fulfill her duties, despite repeated reminders, you should gently but firmly explain to her that the animal can be taken away from her. If this has no effect, then you will have to carry out the threat, even if it turns out to be difficult. Ten years of age is quite sufficient to learn the commandment of the unforgettable Antoine de Saint-Exupéry: “We are responsible for those we have tamed.”

Transitional age

Dear parents, you are standing at the very beginning of a difficult path through the thorny teenage period. How you take your first steps will determine your entire future journey. Whether you go along with your child, or you have to watch him from the side, depends only on what kind of relationship you build at this stage. Become comrades-in-arms and support for your children, and they will answer you in kind!