Relationships between a man and a woman. How to build relationships correctly

According to psychology, relationships between a man and a woman go through 7 stages of development. And if at one stage something goes wrong, someone is in a hurry or, conversely, does not want to move forward, the couple may not reach the deep feelings and affection on which a family is built. In the article I will describe in detail the process of developing a romantic connection, as well as the features of each step.

Relationships between a man and a woman

The relationship between a man and a woman should be based on love, patience, respect, understanding, passion. There are no absolutely ideal relationships; resentments and misunderstandings periodically arise in any family.

Love is a feeling of deep sympathy, affection and aspiration for another person.

Source Wikipedia

One of the main needs in a relationship is communication. When this does not happen, the family begins to fall apart. Partners must be emotionally open to each other. They should not only talk, but also share their feelings, desires and secrets.

You must be able to adapt to your partner, empathize, give advice, and understand him. Treat your other half with care.

If partners are happy, there are no secrets between them. They can talk to each other about everything in the world. Argue and not be afraid of being ridiculed. Healthy relationships are about respect.

If the husband does not agree with his wife’s opinion, he will not insult her, but will step aside so that she can “cool down” and later try to explain why she is wrong.

Mutual support is important in a relationship. Partners rejoice in each other’s successes, overcome difficulties together, and develop together. And then the relationship becomes strong and harmonious.

The most difficult thing in a relationship is to remain yourself and accept your partner for who he is. There is no need to change anyone. If people feel good together, they relax, and they don’t need to pretend and pretend to be someone else. You must behave naturally with your partner and be able to compromise in any situation.

A relationship will not be complete without intimate life. Sexual desire is a common need of any adult. If you ignore it, further development of the relationship will be impossible.

Adviсe

My recommendations:

• Put away your smartphone, laptop, tablet. Communicate more in person.
• Find a common hobby - drawing, sports, music, board games, completing quests.
• Read and discuss the same book. You will better understand your partner's thoughts.
• Kiss more - sweetly at parting, passionately in bed, routinely when meeting.
• Hug and hold hands. When touched, dopamine is produced, which makes us happier.
• Tell us everything that amused you, disappointed you, touched you, or brought you into a stupor. Share your feelings not only towards him, but also your emotions regarding the environment.
• Give compliments. Tell him why you love him right now!

Relationships between men and women - psychology

Relationships between a man and a woman can inspire, inspire and make you happy. But they can also cause disappointment, despair and loss of trust in your partner.

A man and a woman are two sides of the same coin.

Jan Stanpen

To maintain a warm and close relationship, to enjoy every minute spent next to your loved one, you just need to follow simple rules:

• A person attracts people like himself. If you are not satisfied with something in your personal life, first of all, you should understand yourself. If everything is fine with you, and you are lucky with the people around you, then this is your merit;
• Your soulmate is your mirror image. Give him and give everything that you would like to receive yourself;
• Relationships will be strong if you are willing to sacrifice something for your loved one, take care of him and be responsible. Relationships will be doomed to failure in advance if they are built on jealousy, suspicion, and a sense of ownership;
• Control your speech. As they say, “the word is not a sparrow; if it flies out, you won’t catch it.” Do not humiliate or insult your partner, forget about reproaches. This can lead to a scandal or a break in the relationship;
• Speak more kind words, give compliments, support in difficult situations;
• The basis of relationships and an integral element of love is trust. There is no need to constantly monitor your loved one, check his SMS messages and social networks;
• There will be no good atmosphere in the family if the partners do not respect each other. Their views on life may be different, but they must learn to respect the other’s opinion and not impose their own on him;
• Find time to spend with your partner and take care of him.

“The Art of Loving”, Erich Fromm

Psychoanalyst and philosopher Erich Fromm is the greatest thinker of our time. Perhaps no one except him answered the question more deeply: what is love?

This is not so much a book about relationships as a beautiful discussion about the nature of love.

According to Fromm, love is of two types: fruitful, existential or giving, and love based on the principle of possession.

The first is mature love. A person strives to care for and get to know the object of love, he is actively interested in the development of his partner.

The second type is immature love. There is not so much a feeling here as a desire to possess a partner, to keep him under control, to deprive him of freedom. Fromm believes that there is no life in this kind of relationship.

In fact, almost every couple can recognize themselves in the description of immature love. Jealousy, scandals and attempts to constantly control a partner come from immaturity.

Relationships between a man and a woman

Each partner should have personal space and be free to use their time as they see fit.

If you want a strong relationship:

• Be cheerful. Life is a complicated thing and sometimes things happen that you are not particularly happy about. But you need to think positively and enjoy life, and this will affect your relationship with your partner;
• Feel free to show your feelings, confess your love and give gifts to your loved one. Hug him, say gentle words, talk to him more about current affairs, about your problems. There must be a relationship between lovers;
• Spouses should sleep together, it brings them closer together.

To save a marriage, both spouses must work at it.

Secrets of good family relationships

To maintain a strong relationship, do not forget about these simple tips:

• Don’t make scandals with or without reason, be tolerant of each other;
• Make time to connect with your partner. Even if you are at work all day, find time to discuss family matters and problems with your significant other;
• Support him in any useful endeavors. Your interest gives him confidence and motivates him;
• Learn to listen to each other.

In what cases does polygamy occur?

First of all, it is the guy’s understanding of how much he needs other girls besides the main one.

Polygamous relationships also occur in cases:

1. When a guy doesn't have a main girlfriend.
2. When a man leads a free lifestyle and he simply loves freedom.

I'm talking about polygamous relationships, which are still a choice . That is, a man has relationships with girls after intimacy, and he has several of them.

How to build a relationship with a man

For partners to live happily ever after, they need to learn how to build relationships. And for this there are certain rules that cannot be broken.

What are these rules?

If you decide to build a relationship with a man, you need to decide on your self-esteem. Understated or, conversely, too high, it will interfere with relationships. You must set a clear goal for yourself: what kind of person do you need for your life together and how do you imagine your relationship with your partner.

The first impression a girl makes on a guy is of great importance. It is unlikely that he will want to start a family with a frivolous person. Watch your speech. Do not use too bright cosmetics, choose comfortable and practical clothes and shoes. Don't forget that you are a girl, so the guy should take the first step towards dating.

Relationships between a man and a woman should be built on love, trust, respect, and honesty. Strong relationships are built on female wisdom. Don’t be offended over trifles, don’t make scandals, know how to remain silent where necessary.

Top 7 sure signs that they are trying to take advantage of you

In this life, one way or another, we all use someone for our own purposes. Bosses use workers as hired labor, suppliers use customers as a source of money, wives use husbands to carry heavy loads, husbands use wives to cook food and wash shirts. In all these cases there is some kind of mutual exchange. So, just if no exchange occurs, it’s time to suspect that they are trying to use you in the worst sense of the word. How to recognize manipulation? In this article we will talk about the most striking and common signs. Read more…

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How to build a strong relationship with a man

Any woman wants a man next to her with whom she would feel protected, attractive and at the same time weak as a woman.

And yet, before meeting their one and only, many have to go through disappointments in order to understand what she really wants. And that's not a bad thing. From her personal experience, she will be able to understand the individual characteristics of her character and decide how to build a future relationship with a man.

What does a woman want from a man? It depends on age, social status, temperament, social circle.

Here are the main reasons why a woman wants a relationship with a man:

• Marry. This is a natural desire of any woman of reproductive age. Every woman wants to start a family, give birth to a child, take care of her husband;
• Don't be lonely, love and be loved;
• Meet a patron who would solve her financial problems;
• Find a good caring lover;
• Find a father for your children.

Every woman should remember one simple thing: a good relationship with a man will only work out when a woman loves and respects herself.

In this case, she will not enter into a relationship with a married man, gigolo or psychopath. Only when she has a good relationship with her partner can she feel happy.

“What French Women Are Silent About,” Debra Olivier

American journalist Debra Olivier married a French man, moved to France and was amazed. Why? The ability of French women to enjoy every minute and the simplicity of relationships and life.

Debra decided to explore their secrets. In her opinion, every woman lives such a light and charismatic Frenchwoman, and every man can become, with the right approach, the heroes of her novel.

The journalist points out that in French there is no expression “opposite sex.”

Maybe this is the secret of the attractiveness of French women - that they do not consider men to be some kind of alien creatures?

Olivier explores American and French culture, trying to understand all the secrets of love and sex in French.

How to build a relationship with the man you love

How to build a relationship with your loved one in order to ultimately create a strong family?

A happy family is the hard work of two people.

What are the relationships based on?

• On feelings. Love, respect, affection - these are the feelings that make a couple stay together. If people are indifferent to each other, then they will not succeed in a family union. Sometimes feelings undergo changes. Love turns into hatred, respect into disdain. But people never remain indifferent in relationships. Feelings can be killed or made even stronger. It all depends on both partners;
• Depends on the person's upbringing. If a child grew up in a strong family where the father loved and respected the mother, then he will grow up to be just as caring and gentle. And, on the contrary, if he was brought up in a dysfunctional family, drinking and fighting took place before his eyes, he will most likely choose the same scenario of behavior when he gets married;
• Experience matters a lot. If a woman lived with a tyrant husband, she will subconsciously look for the same qualities in her current partner, despite his good attitude towards her. And if a guy broke up with a sweet, caring girl, he will not immediately be able to discern the deceitful and evil essence in his new girlfriend. Lack of experience also negatively affects relationships. It will be quite difficult to understand a new partner; you will have to learn to give in and defend your opinion.

Strong relationships are based on a mutual desire to be together. Lovers adapt to each other, find compromises, and work around rough edges. And this work gives positive results and helps us live together for many years.

To live together or not to live: advantages and disadvantages

When you have been dating for some time, the question arises: “Should you live together or not?”

Let's first remove questions about money, about a place to live, who will move to whom.

When you start living together , you need to say 2 important things:

1. You spend more time together and begin to depend on household factors . You need to understand that when you live together, relationships begin to develop differently.
2. There must be an understanding that the candy bouquet period will pass for you . The chemistry and psychology of the relationship between a guy and a girl changes, an eerie mutual love passes at some point. According to various studies, this happens from 3 months to 2 years, and you will have to move to some other plane.

Why are relationships needed?

The desire to find your soul mate is primarily driven by the desire to procreate. I want to start a family, give birth and raise children.

Besides this, there are other reasons:

• It’s easier to live together and experience life’s difficulties;
• It’s more joyful to experience pleasant moments together;
• In difficult times you can rely on someone;
• There is someone to care about and someone to turn to for advice;
• To have someone to meet old age with.

The reasons are different for everyone, but, in any case, it is much more difficult to live alone than with a loved one.

Conditions for harmonious love

Still, after analyzing the stages, we can agree with Jung. Before you demand love from another person, you should accept and love yourself. You need to develop your personality, deal with problems, and not drive them even deeper. If this is not done, then the vicious circle of freezing at a certain stage will not be overcome. And you need to start working on yourself during puberty, in adolescence. After all, many modern couples, driven by the social idea of ​​marriage before 25 and having a child before 30, get married at the stage of falling in love. According to statistics, more than half of couples separate in the first year of marriage, and increasingly, when they have a child.

Having somewhat systematized everything described above, we can formulate the main theses:

• to achieve love in a couple, it is necessary to complete all stages of personal development;
• secure attachment at the stage of falling in love is impossible if there is a problem in unformed secure attachment to parents;
• successful overcoming of conflicts is possible in the absence of problems when “cutting the umbilical cord” with parents;
• You can accept your partner’s individuality only by understanding your own imperfection;
• mature individuals do not use manipulative methods in communicating with their loved ones, but know how to negotiate and ask;
• we fall in love based on an imagined ideal, but in the end we learn to love a real person.

Why can't you build relationships?

Sometimes it happens that a beautiful and smart woman cannot build a relationship with a man.

Why is this happening?

The reasons can be very different, but the main ones are:

• Bad example of parents. It is very important to understand that all people are different, as well as situations. It is quite possible that your life will be more successful than that of your relatives;
• Demands on men are too high. Give free rein to your feelings, not your mind. Treat men more easily;
• Takes on the male role. You shouldn’t do this and make decisions for men. This scares them away. Be feminine, gentle, defenseless;
• Idealization of a partner. Accept your partner for who he really is. Do not idealize him, do not attribute to him the qualities that you would like to see in him. Otherwise, you will have to be disappointed in him later;
• Self-dislike. Love yourself, be confident, smile more often. Do something you enjoy.

But very often a woman cannot build a relationship with a man because he:

• Womanizer;
• Egoist;
• Gigolo;
• Despot;
• Alcoholic.

If a woman has nevertheless linked her fate with such a person, it is better to end the relationship with him as soon as possible and try to find a worthy match. There is no need to dwell on negative experiences. Live, rejoice and believe that very soon everything will be fine for you.

Results

When reading about the time frames and stages that couples go through to find cherished love, one should not try to adjust them by measuring conventional periods. All these steps, two of them, take place unconsciously, developing in pairs, as sedately as they do personally. It is impossible to build a harmonious union just by imagining it. To do this, you need to work and develop yourself, first of all. We must remember that having internal conflicts, we push away the people we need, and attract those from whom we subsequently suffer. Therefore, there is no need to seek salvation in relationships; they should become a complement to a mature personality, a logical continuation, evolution.

Do you believe that childhood traumas have such a strong influence on adult life? Did the article help you understand how to solve problems in your couple?