Why do we respect other people? Why is it so important to be respectful to elders? Or what lies behind the feeling of patriotism? There are countless questions like this, and it would seem that any adult can answer them. But in reality, most are lost in their answers. And all because they cannot understand the full depth of the word “respect”.
That's why it's so important to understand this. After all, respect is a feeling of reverence that is vital for the existence of society. Without it, it is impossible to build normal relationships, much less create a full-fledged family.
Concept
Let's start with what respect is. The essence of this feeling is quite difficult to convey in simple words, however, like any other manifestation of humanity. And yet it is possible to express the main idea.
So, respect is a respectful attitude towards a person, a natural phenomenon, a deity or a homeland. In order for this feeling to arise, the object of respect must have a certain set of qualities.
Respect is a fickle feeling; it can arise and then fade away again. Everything depends on the moral and ethical values of a person, which, as we know, can change over time. Therefore, by instilling these values in an individual, one can influence his sense of respect for others.
Support
Pay attention to what kind of people you like. Those who swear and try to make themselves look smarter with the phrase: “I told you so,” or those who will support you in any situation? Even if he warned about the consequences?
Caring is a quality that everyone needs, regardless of your gender and age. Sometimes situations happen that affect us so much that notations only worsen the condition. Everyone in life needs someone who will offer to go out to a cafe or have some fun to take your mind off the problem. So maybe that person will be you?
Read also: How and why to use palo santo
Why is it so important to respect others?
To answer this question, let's give a simple example. Let's say there are two brothers: one is kind, friendly and treats others with respect; the second, on the contrary, looks down on everyone and considers himself the center of the universe. Who do you think is more likely to make real friends? Which of them is capable of sincere love?
Respect is a sure way to find a common language with other people, to show that your interlocutor cares about them. Moreover, if the opponent feels that he is being treated with sincere respect, he himself will most likely respond in kind.
To summarize, we can say that respect is a key element in building relationships, both loving and friendly.
How to learn to respect other people and give compliments
Without respect for other people, it is difficult for a person to establish contact with society, since every fellow tribesman wants to feel a pleasant attitude towards himself. And, everyone instinctively treats more favorably those people who shower him with compliments, of course, if they do not look false and overly flattering. What should you do if nature has endowed you with a mindset of “doubting the merits of other people”?
First of all, you should learn the rule:
The greatness of a person can be judged based on how he treats people below or above him on the social ladder, as well as people with different views. Regardless of financial wealth, age, religious faith and gender, if a person shows reverence, respect, kindness and love for all people, he only increases his dignity in the eyes of others. Of course, everyone can understand these words in their own way, but true respect for people prescribes not to cause intentional harm to another person, either physical or moral. All people are different, and this creates our personal identity. Respect for others is being able to understand and accept that, despite our individual differences, we are all equal as members of society. Only on the basis of respect can mutual understanding emerge, so if you want to be respected, your behavior must be appropriate.
It’s very easy to think of the benefits of respect as a returning boomerang. It happens that by their behavior people offend a person, sometimes without even realizing it, and sometimes they easily forget about their action. In this case, such an attitude will definitely return to them. And if a person is kind to others, then he will more often receive kindness in return.
To learn to respect other people, try to see in any person, first of all, his positive qualities. It is possible, for example, that a person seems fickle and unreliable to you, but take a closer look, perhaps he improves the mood of those around him. Or, it happens that a person seems poor and stupid to you, but perhaps he devotes more time to helping the people around him, and the vector of his development is directed in a completely different direction than yours. Even if it seems to you that there is a person in front of you absolutely devoid of any merits, ask if perhaps his life circumstances were much more complicated than yours, or he simply turned out to be not strong enough, and what is the use of offending the weak?
Having learned to see the positive sides in people, you can easily learn to win them over, all you need to do is listen carefully, act ethically and do not skimp on gratitude and compliments.
- Try not to interrupt people when they are trying to convey to you something that is meaningful to them; if the person is too carried away by his story, politely tell him that you will be happy to listen to his story next time, but now you need to switch to another activity.
- Never forget to thank people for their help and support. Thank everyone: relatives, colleagues, friends, teachers, neighbors; none of them were obliged to help you just like that.
- Give people sincere compliments.
- Don't make empty promises. If you promise to do something, try to do it no matter what happens. Respect other people's requests and come to meetings on time, prepared and enthusiastic. Well, if it still doesn’t work out, don’t forget to apologize properly.
- Don't throw around criticism without knowing your opponent's history. For example, when expressing your admiration for children, do not forget to ask if your opponent has any problems in acquiring them. Otherwise, you risk lowering the opinion of you.
- Don't meddle in other people's business.
How to give compliments to people correctly? First, let’s look at what compliments are, this will help you understand that a sufficient number of positive qualities can be found in every person:
Types of compliments
- Compliment to the work. This is a compliment to the performer, giving praise to the result of his work, used in an exclamatory or interrogative form: “The design turned out great!” or “How do you manage to write such interesting and competent texts?”
- Compliment to personal qualities. Praise for a person’s personal qualities, his abilities, habits, can be directed towards a person or a third party: “Your accuracy and attention to detail are very pleasing”, “Thanks to the punctuality of the programmer, we managed to complete the project in the shortest possible time” or “Where are they taught such tact and How's your restraint?"
- Comparative compliment. In such praise, a person highlights what seems to him the most valuable and significant in the opponent and compares it with himself: “I wish I had the same sense of taste as you,” “You completed the project in three days! It would have taken me at least a week” or “The video was edited flawlessly. I wish I could learn that too!”
- Compliment through criticism. This is a provocative compliment that combines both negative feedback and praise. The contrast enhances the positive part of the compliment: “Despite the high price, the quality of your services is impressive” or “You write articles slowly, but without a single mistake.”
- Compliment an action. Praise for an action done once in the old days: “I will never forget how you helped me that day!” or “The last party was a great success for you!”
- Compliment on appearance. This is the most popular type of compliment, and the most overused, so don’t overuse it. “You look so great that I recognized you right away...” or “Well, they probably told you about your eyes today...” but remember that over time people get tired of compliments on their appearance and want to hear compliments on their other qualities.
Well, now just use your memory and imagination, and compliments will pour in like a river! Enjoy your communication!
Moral and ethical standards in society
In modern society there are foundations that, although not spelled out in legislation, are still generally accepted rules. Compliance with them is extremely important, otherwise you can turn the opinions of others against yourself. Such rules include moral and ethical standards, for example, politeness, restraint, neatness, and so on.
According to these unspoken laws, there are categories of people who should be treated with respect, regardless of whether they are familiar or not. So, let's give an example of such categories of people:
- Elderly. Considering their age and the number of tests they have undergone, respect for them is quite justified.
- Women. All of them are expectant mothers, and therefore require respectful respect.
- Parents. The very fact that they gave life cannot but inspire respect.
- Teachers. Thanks to their work, many gain knowledge that can help them achieve their goals.
- Colleagues. It’s a completely understandable choice, because you’ll have to work with these people for more than one year. Therefore, it is much easier when they are in the category of friends rather than putting a spoke in their wheels.
Who are the “disrespectful”
Psychologist Anna Kiryanova cites an old fairy tale about the boy Hassan as an illustration of people who are unable to show respect.
“Once upon a time, a little boy Hassan, who lived in a small village, had a string holding up his pants untied and they fell down. His relatives and neighbors laughed until they cried and remembered this incident for a long time.
Years have passed. Hassan has grown up. He left the village and became a great commander. And one day, Caliph Hasan, a great commander, brave, famous and rich, decided to visit his native village, equipping a caravan with gifts for the trip.
Elena has a difficult character: what is the secret of Anton Khabarov’s happy family
Fruit breakfast: why it’s better to eat apples with the peel and the benefits of bananas
“My son forbade it”: the star of “Morozko” Sedykh did not come to the funeral of her ex-husband
However, the residents, seeing him, began to laugh again, remembering “pantsless Hassan.” Then he turned his caravan around and left his village forever.”
Disdain, ridicule, arrogance, devaluation, jealousy, envy, fawning, sometimes open aggression or constant attempts to change the topic of conversation from something pleasant to you to any other, most often unpleasant for you, memories of your mistakes, defeats, mistakes, embarrassments and complete disregard for your success and achievements - such an attitude indicates a lack of any respect.
“Disrespectful” are those who constantly refer to the past in this way because they are stuck there forever and want to leave you there too. For the same reason, they do not value your time and do not fulfill their promises to you.
Respect for the Fatherland: its role in the formation of patriotism
Homeland is not just six letters in one word. This is what unites everyone and makes us one big family. Love for the Motherland is called patriotism. But here’s the question: “Can he exist on love alone?” No, in order for patriotism not to dry out over the years, it must be constantly fueled by other feelings: pride, respect, gratitude.
Only by realizing all the beauty of your country, its features and shortcomings, can you become a patriot. And as mentioned earlier, respect is recognition of the merits of someone or something; accordingly, without it it is impossible to cultivate true patriotism.
Respect must be taught from childhood
The easiest way to instill respect for others is in childhood. Therefore, in most cases, this responsibility falls on the shoulders of parents, as well as teachers. They are the ones who must explain to the younger generation why this or that person should be respected.
Children should be taught from an early age that they need to listen to their elders and fulfill their demands. After all, their life experience is much greater, therefore, their advice can be useful. They should also be reminded that each person is an individual, and therefore needs to be treated with respect.
In general, respect for human rights is an established norm for everyone. Therefore, you should teach this to your children or pupils. Otherwise, they may have problems communicating with other people in the future.
Finally, we need to talk about such a phenomenon as self-esteem. After all, how can people respect someone who does not consider himself equal to them? Therefore, you need to explain to the child that he is the same as everyone else. What's inside him is much more important than what he wears or what house he lives in.
How to achieve respect?
Respect is a mutual concept: without the recognition and respect of others, you cannot count on respect in your own direction. Every person has something to respect, but not everyone understands this. How to achieve respect in a team:
- sincerely give compliments:
- rejoice in the successes of others, celebrate it;
- empathize with failures;
- be open and friendly;
- do not allow ridicule to be addressed to you;
- cultivate professionalism.
Self respect
The need for respect is one of the most important basic needs, this is how a person identifies himself: “I am!”, “I am significant!”. Self-respect is formed for oneself and is included in the “I-concept” of the individual, which is formed on the basis of the assessment of a person by significant people, then in public institutions. What is self-respect - there is no one characteristic parameter here, these are all components of self-esteem:
- knowledge of your strengths and weaknesses;
- desire for self-improvement and personal growth;
- honesty with yourself;
- working with shortcomings;
- recognition of one's merits and contribution as an individual to society;
- the value of oneself as an individual;
- awareness of one's divine essence;
Respect in the family
What is mutual understanding and respect in a family? Bert Hellinger, a German psychotherapist, once said that respect is a vessel, a form, and love is what fills this vessel; if there is no respect in the family, there can be no talk of love. Respect for a man as the head of the clan has always been a tradition among many nations; children growing up in such a family saw significance and authority. For sons to see their mother's attitude towards their father, based on respect. A man who makes his choice of a wife must also understand that if there is no respect for his wife, then this is disrespect for himself.
What does it mean to show love and respect between spouses for each other:
- moral support and appropriate sympathy;
- absence of insults and assault;
- confidence;
- taking into account opinions and compromise in case of disagreements;
- warm and kind words;
- joint decision-making that is important for the family;
- caring for each family member;
- joint contribution to raising children and arranging everyday life;
- constructive criticism.
