No matter how hard you try to build an idyllic relationship with your partner, quarrels and misunderstandings will still occur in your life. And in such everyday “storms” the guys are not always the only ones to blame.
Sometimes discord in relationships - wittingly or unwittingly - is provoked by the girls themselves. And the male sex can be, oh, how touchy! Sometimes even families collapse because of words of apology not spoken in time, let alone just couples in love. And in such cases, excessive pride is a bad adviser. If you feel that you are wrong about something, learn for your own good to say words of remorse and regret. After all, you can arrange all this in such a way that you will not feel humiliated at all, and at the same time you will definitely be forgiven by your man.
How to apologize
How to apologize to a guy in order to achieve reconciliation and end the conflict? The best option is to ask for forgiveness directly, rather than from a distance.
Choosing the right words is very difficult, so you have to use non-verbal techniques:
- try to look the guy in the eyes to give the impression of utmost honesty and sincerity;
- speak only the truth. Men sometimes lie to save themselves, but they tolerate the lies of others very poorly;
- Avoid making vain promises that you know you cannot keep. Otherwise, you will only make the situation worse;
- don’t raise your voice, don’t try to accuse the guy of anything. His mistakes and wrong actions can be discussed further, after the reconciliation has taken place;
- The words may be different, but still, the best ones remain: “I’m wrong”, “I’m sorry”. If the situation is not too difficult, then the words “don’t be offended”, “no need to sulk” are appropriate.
It's good if verbal apologies are accompanied by hugs and kisses.
Build your dialogue correctly: say not “we” or “you”, but “I”
Very often, even when asking for forgiveness, women manage to defend their point of view. They find it difficult to admit they are wrong, and therefore the apology seems forced. What advice can psychologists give in this case?
- Do not try to directly or indirectly blame your significant other, claiming that it was his actions that provoked the quarrel.
- There is no need to defend yourself during an apology or try to shield your own actions.
- Also, you should not shift the blame to third parties, as this best shows a person’s weakness.
- When apologizing, you should not make threats about separation if there is no reconciliation.
It is very difficult to apologize to a loved one after a major quarrel. And if at the same time he tries to justify himself, without admitting his own guilt in his soul, this turns out to be almost impossible. If a girl decides to repent, she should be extremely sincere, without trying to shift responsibility for the quarrel to anyone.
Another mistake is trying to issue ultimatums. “I'll apologize if you don't do anything anymore” is the wrong attitude. Setting conditions always implies that the person does not consider himself guilty.
What words to choose
The most sincere and appropriate words in any situation will be words of repentance that come directly from the heart. A man will certainly feel the truthfulness of such an apology and will grant forgiveness to his beloved. If the girl’s guilt is great, then an apology in her own words will be the best.
We can say something like this:
“Forgive me, I am very sorry for what happened and I realize that I made a big mistake. I realized my own guilt, so I ask you to forgive me and give me a chance to prove that I loved and love you.”
“Of all the people in the world, you are dearer and dearest to me. I'm sorry that I hurt you with my actions. It’s necessary and important for me to know that there is still a place for you in your heart.”
“It pains me to realize that my mistake has become a threat to our love. Forgive me, my love, and give me a chance to prove that no one will love you more than me. You are the whole Universe for me, be generous!”
It’s quite simple to apologize in your own words, but it’s better to prepare the text in advance so that you don’t forget all the words you wanted to say to the guy out of excitement.
Apologize to your husband to improve family relationships
If grievances have been accumulating for years and I don’t feel guilty
You should analyze your relationship with your spouse and understand from what period problems appeared in your relationship. Also think about whether these conflicts can be resolved in any way, and if this is not possible, whether you are able to come to terms with a situation that does not suit you.
Talk frankly with your husband and try together to understand why you cannot achieve harmony in your family. Ask your husband what exactly he is dissatisfied with and what his vision is for solving this problem. In turn, convey to your spouse what you don’t like and ask how he sees the current situation developing. If your husband is dear to you, and you do not want to ruin your family, then be attentive to his words. It is possible that something in your behavior seriously upsets him or offends him, but at the same time you do not feel guilty. Explain to your chosen one why you are convinced that you are right and why you are sure that he has no reason to be offended. If your arguments seem unconvincing to your chosen one, and you understand that the current situation really hurts him, then it makes sense to apologize, at least with the following words: “Sorry that you have to experience such emotions, I really didn’t want it to upset you.”
Advice from a family psychologist
Express your sympathy to your loved one. Don't dismiss his grievances as something stupid or unimportant. Let him know that you understand the reason for his worries, and it is not easy for you that there is a place for such emotions in your family.
Be responsible. Don't apologize as if you were doing a favor to your loved one. Let him see that you regret the offense caused to him, and at least partially take the blame upon yourself. The appropriate phrases are: “I regret that I did this,” “I understand that I offended you with my action,” and so on.
SMS
It is possible that an absentee apology is not the best option. But a well-thought-out text, generously flavored with cute emoticons, can sometimes improve the situation.
When writing a message to apologize via SMS to a guy, you need to consider the following:
- periodicity. You don't need to send them too often. The optimal frequency is one message every 3 hours;
- SMS must be sincere and original - repetitions are unacceptable;
- if there is no answer, you should think over a meaningful and heartfelt text;
- There is no need for excuses and attempts to shield yourself. The guy must understand that you truly realized that you were wrong;
- mention in the message that you value the relationship very much and are ready to change for the sake of it. Of course, for the better;
- Before you apologize in SMS messages, you can select ready-made texts from the Internet. But they are only permissible if your offense is minor. If the situation is serious, they are unlikely to help.
Here are examples of beautiful texts that will allow you to make amends to your loved one:
Darling, I ask you, do not be angry if I accidentally offended you. Give me a smile, and I will try to do everything to never upset you.
Darling, life is too short to pay attention to insults. Forgive me, please!
I'm very sorry that this happened. I made a mistake, but without malicious intent. Our relationship is very important to me, and I cannot allow occasional disagreements to become an obstacle to our love. My main desire is to make peace with you!
What most often causes resentment
Words and actions can hurt a person, and everyone has their own threshold of sensitivity. It is impossible to know in advance what will hurt a guy, so no one is immune from mistakes in relationships. But the good news is that everything can be fixed if you find the right words to apologize and sincerely repent. In the future, knowing the weak points and common causes of male grievances, a girl will be able to avoid mistakes.
READ
Reasons why a guy pays too little attention to his girlfriend
Insulting a guy in front of friends
For a male representative, reputation among friends is extremely important. If a girl shows disrespect for her chosen one and insults him in front of her friends, this is a reason for resentment and conflict. Beautiful apologies cannot always make amends to her lover; the girl will have to prove that she respects her chosen one. The minimum that she will have to do is apologize to the guy in front of the same audience, in order not only to receive forgiveness, but also to show her true attitude towards her chosen one in the social circle.
Girl's unreasonable jealousy
Jealousy for no reason is the best way to ruin a relationship, because it is the first sign of a lack of trust in your partner. Accusations of infidelity on the part of a girl can greatly hurt, because it indicates a lack of trust. Pathological jealousy destroys relationships. If a few episodes and complaints can be ignored, but constant reproaches lead to protracted conflicts.
Treason
If the reason for the disagreement was the girl's cheating, apologizing to the guy may not work. Statistics show that women are much more likely to forgive men who betrayed them. Representatives of the stronger sex react sharply to betrayal, equating it to a break in a relationship, so you shouldn’t count on forgiveness. But if a relationship with a guy is dear to a girl and she realized her mistake, it’s worth trying to restore the broken connection.
READ
What to do when a guy is offended: recommendations from psychologists
Cheating is an act that can be forgiven, but apologies are not always able to restore harmony in a relationship. When deciding to fight to preserve a relationship, a girl needs to be prepared for the fact that her efforts may be unsuccessful. It is also worth considering that it may take too long to restore trust.
Flirting with other guys
Guys don't tolerate rivals, so everyone a girl flirts with is perceived as a potential competitor. Resentment in the case of flirting with other men causes a storm of emotions and jealousy, so there is no need to rush to immediately ask for forgiveness.
You can ask directly: “What hooked you, why are you offended?” If a guy says that flirting hurts him, you should reconsider your attitude towards innocent coquetry in order to maintain a harmonious relationship with your partner.
Making fun of weaknesses
If a girl makes a remark to her beloved man, this may anger him. But when she finds the most vulnerable places and makes fun of them, it hurts. Before asking a guy for forgiveness, you need to make sure that emotions have cooled down and he is ready to listen not through the prism of pain.
Guys rarely show that they are in pain - this is a feature of male psychology. They are afraid to show weakness, so they may carry this emotional burden within themselves. To return peace to the relationship and restore the atmosphere, you need to apologize and be sure to show respect, assure the young man of love and unconditional acceptance.
READ
Why a man ignores the woman he likes: changing the situation in our favor
Bad habits
Destructive habits, such as drunken partying or unpunctuality, negatively affect relationships. Here's how to apologize with gifts and surprises to your lover:
- arrange a romantic dinner;
- give an intimate gift, for example, a striptease;
- send by courier an anonymous letter asking for forgiveness and a touching text.
You can just sit down and talk, tell how difficult it is to cope with your weaknesses, and then ask the man you love for support.
Termination of an unplanned pregnancy
If a girl offended a guy by getting rid of an unplanned pregnancy, it will not be easy to make amends, because the consequences of the act are irreparable. It takes time for the pain to subside, especially if the young man is committed to a serious and long-term relationship. For a guy who dreams of a child and a family, this will be a psychological trauma. You need to prepare strong arguments to explain your actions and be patient. Over time, the pain will pass and the relationship will be restored.
Lack of attention
If a girl leads an active lifestyle, devotes a lot of time to her studies or career, and has many friends, her partner may feel deprived of her attention. On this basis, grievances and quarrels may arise. To restore your relationship with your loved one, you need to schedule a meeting, correct the situation and make him feel needed and loved again.
READ
How to strengthen your relationship with a guy: useful recommendations from psychologists
Unpunctuality
It is generally accepted that only men need punctuality. It's a delusion. Mature men want to see next to them equally responsible and conscientious girls who can keep their word.
If a girl is consistently late and doesn’t keep her promises, this can lead to a serious conflict. In some cases, irresponsibility even leads to a break in relationships. To receive forgiveness for such behavior, a girl should change her approach to organizing her time and try to keep her promises.
Lie
Lying undermines the foundation of relationships—trust. If a girl has committed dishonesty, you should prepare for serious problems, but you can fix everything. When there is love in a couple, anything can be overcome. Correctly apologizing, explaining to the guy the motives for your action and promising that this will not happen again is the only way out of the situation.
It is still important to tell the truth so that the lies told earlier do not spoil the relationship in the future. To apologize for lying and receive forgiveness, a girl should reassure her partner of her sincerity and that trust in a relationship is most valuable to her.
How to apologize on VKontakte
If you don’t have the courage to apologize to your loved one in person, there is a good way - ask for forgiveness on VKontakte.
There are several options:
- send a private card to the young man with words of apology and a beautiful picture;
- the simplest option is to send a message in which you regret what happened. The bravest girls can make a status message to their loved one on their page;
- Sometimes starting a conversation is enough to achieve reconciliation. Let it not be an ordinary date at first, but an online correspondence. Conversation on abstract topics calms and encourages reconciliation;
- try to call the guy for a frank conversation. Sometimes in a chat you can say something that you would never dare to say in reality.
But don’t flatter yourself too much. It’s not at all a fact that the guy will like such an apology. In fact, you did not quarrel online, but face to face. Therefore, it is possible that such correspondence will not be enough.
Show that you are upset
If a woman for some reason managed to offend a man, she must show not only the truthfulness of repentance, but also sincere frustration. A man must understand that a woman regrets what happened and wants to make amends.
The best way to demonstrate this is through tears. It is also necessary to spend all evenings at home, remain silent, and rarely smile. In this case, the man will understand that his beloved is in a bad mood, and all because of the recent quarrel. His heart will melt if a woman shows sincere sad emotions.
Apology in verse
Beautiful rhyming lines are designed to awaken positive emotions in a person’s soul. Of course, this is not a panacea. Often, only a frank conversation and an explanation of your own actions will help save a relationship.
Some examples of poetic attempts at reconciliation:
Nothing can be returned, I understand, I was wrong, I don’t argue. Forgive me, I beg you, I will atone for my sin with love!
***
I made a mistake and now the door to your heart is closed. You are dear to me, forgive me, dear, I want to live my life with you!
***
Everything turned out the way I didn’t want, I feel very bad about it. Forgive me, you are my value, I don’t need anything without you.
Place and time2
So that you can have a normal conversation, choose neutral territory. It could be a cafe, a park, or just a bench near the house. There should be no strangers nearby, the environment should be calm. Before setting a time, ask if he has anything else to do at that hour. It is important that during a conversation a man is not distracted by other problems and is not in a hurry.
If your loved one says he needs to go, don't keep it. Just say this: “Please listen to me and you can go. I really need to explain everything to you." Ask when he can make time for you, and agree to whatever he suggests. He’ll say he’ll call you when he’s free, don’t call him yourself. Wait, the main thing here is not to go too far.
Unusual Apology
There are also some unconventional and creative ideas that will help you ask for forgiveness from your boyfriend and melt the heart of your loved one. After all, you tried so hard for him.
Here are some ideas you might like:
- write words of apology under the guy’s windows;
- present a gift with appropriate words;
- record a beautiful voice card with delivery by courier;
- order a billboard with an apology and a corresponding image (the event is quite expensive, but looks impressive);
- the original option is an edible gift - a cake or pie baked yourself. Considering what exactly the path to a man’s heart lies through, it must be effective. Reconciliation over tea may not look very romantic, but those with a sweet tooth will certainly appreciate such a step;
- You can beautifully apologize to your boyfriend if you give him an unusual gift. Buy two T-shirts of the appropriate sizes, go to a special salon and print a joint photo on them. Give one of them to a guy, and the other to yourself, your beloved - such reconciliation will be remembered for a long time;
- present a bouquet. Contrary to popular belief, guys love flowers. A beautiful composition compiled by a professional florist will be the first step towards renewing the relationship. The bouquet can also be edible: made from sausage, beer, nuts and other goodies that men adore;
- send your loved one by courier a pack of good tea or coffee with a bag of croissants. The “trick” of the gift is that there is a sticker attached to it with the words of an apology or simply: “I miss you.” Don’t be surprised that such a mini-presentation will be followed by an invitation to a joint tea party or a cup of coffee.
If your loved one has a good sense of humor and is able to understand and appreciate a good joke, try to compose (it would be nice to do it yourself!) a humorous message. If you manage to make a person laugh, then achieving forgiveness will be much easier.
Choice of words and behavior tactics
You need to select tactics for communicating with a man in accordance with the situation. Depending on the guilt and severity of the offense, you need to choose a method. An apology should consist of three parts:
- directly the words, the text of the request for forgiveness;
- compensation for wrongdoing, for example, a gift;
- correction.
Depending on who you need to apologize to, the girl should choose the appropriate tactics.
Beloved man
You often have to ask for forgiveness from your beloved man if this is a serious relationship. You cannot do without conflicts and grievances. If a girl needs to take the first step towards reconciliation, she should choose the words and create a favorable environment. Ideas to help you say “Sorry” beautifully:
READ
How to react if a guy talks to other girls
- invite you on a date to your favorite restaurant;
- give him something he has long dreamed of;
- write a touching letter;
- talk to him alone, explain your position.
All people make mistakes, but in a loving couple, any conflicts are easier to resolve, since people realize the value and importance of relationships.
Former
It is better to break up with a man peacefully, without mutual reproaches and claims, so that psychological trauma does not affect all subsequent relationships. If a girl has offended a guy with whom she is no longer in a relationship, you need to choose diplomatic tactics:
- it is important to voice your guilt;
- say about regret that everything turned out this way;
- ask for forgiveness.
Relationships are in the past, so all grievances should also be left there, and not dragged into the future. Even if requests for forgiveness do not bear fruit, the girl should not blame herself - she did everything possible.
Friend
Friendship can be ruined by insults, quarrels or conflicts. But there is always a chance for reconciliation. Here's how to properly apologize to a friend:
- you need to prepare in advance, choose your words;
- It’s worth talking in person, it’s easier to sort out the quarrel and make peace;
- it is important to take responsibility for the action committed and admit the mistake;
- It is worth assuring your friend that the relationship with him is dear to the girl.
Sincerity is important when communicating with friends. If this does not happen, grievances will begin to accumulate, which in an instant can destroy even the strongest friendship.
Prayer and conspiracy for reconciliation
Sometimes prayer and magic techniques help the old relationship return. It happens that this is the only way to extinguish a flared conflict and restore trust and love. Words must be pronounced with the brightest feeling. Prayer will work if there is no room for anger and resentment in the soul.
“Just as the clear sun returns to the sky every morning, so you, beloved, God’s servant (name of goal), will return to me, servant of God (name), but you will not turn around on others. I close this lock with the key and throw it into the ocean, no one can find it, no one can open it, no one can guess it. Amen. Amen. Amen".
Wait out the storm
If you start apologizing as soon as a quarrel occurs, you can only make a mess. It is worth understanding that while the guy is still angry, he may not even want to talk to you. But you can’t wait long, he may think that you feel guilty and are not going to put up with him.
When can you offer your loved one your sincere apology? Then, when he can calmly talk to you, look into your eyes. You can always find out that a guy is ready to make contact by phone. No need to call him. Write in SMS the phrase “How are you? Let's talk.". If you receive at least something in response to the message, even the words that you have nothing to talk about, this will mean that your loved one has “moved away” a little, and you can begin to act.
How to ask for forgiveness
First of all, you need to understand that situations are different and there are differences between apologies and apologies. First, you need to assess the severity of the conflict. Moreover, a quarrel for the same reason (for example, jealousy) can proceed according to different scenarios: from painful silence to hysterics with insults.
For your behavior
An apology for wrong behavior or action should be made after the passions have subsided. Calm down yourself and let your loved one do the same. Now you can say that you were wrong and regret your action. It is important to convey that, in spite of everything, you love the guy and did something ugly not out of malice, but out of ignorance or emotion.
It’s ideal if you can not only apologize for your behavior, but also confirm your words with deeds: prepare a delicious dinner, put the apartment in perfect order, and then invite your loved one to the reconciliation table.
For lying
First, try to understand: lying is always bad. The motives are completely unimportant, even if you tried to tell a white lie and the deception was somehow discovered. It is important that the young man believes that you are sincerely repentant. Therefore, you should ask for forgiveness for deception in person, without relying on correspondence on social networks or exchanging SMS over the phone.
Try to convincingly and affectionately explain the reason why you had to lie. It must be reasoned. The general phrases “It just so happened” or “I didn’t do it on purpose” are unlikely to impress your loved one. The sooner he understands the reason for your behavior, the greater the chance that you will be forgiven.
Under no circumstances say that the guy provoked you. This will be a new lie, because lying is your choice, and no one else’s. A carelessly spoken word can cause a new scandal.
For treason
This is perhaps one of the most serious offenses. It’s not easy to apologize to a guy if you messed up badly. Many men are capable of being seriously offended even for innocent flirting with another, not to mention cheating.
If you want to break up with your boyfriend and did it consciously, then no apology will help. If everything happened by accident and you want to continue the relationship, you need to carefully consider the words of your apology.
You may need the help of friends to arrange a “casual” meeting. Of course, it will take some courage to decide to have a sincere conversation. If the conversation does take place, you need to confess your love with all sincerity and sincerely ask for an apology.
It doesn't matter whether the guy forgives you or decides to remain adamant and not forgive. An explanation is needed in any case. Try to put yourself in his place, and all the “whys” will disappear by themselves.
For jealousy
Girls are often jealous, even without any particular reason. If you have offended your loved one with unfounded suspicions, then the most effective way to ask for forgiveness is through actions: hugs, kisses, as well as a calm and sincere conversation.
If you live with a guy, working together (washing a car or dishes), watching a good movie, buying drinks and delicious food helps a lot. If you are confident in your impeccable appearance and chic plastic, you can perform an impromptu striptease session for a young man.
After a quarrel
Unfortunately, it is impossible to do without grievances and conflicts. If you feel like you're in the wrong and are looking for reconciliation after an argument, it's important to consider how exactly you will apologize.
You can invite a man on a romantic date to a restaurant, prepare him a touching gift (for example, buy something he has been dreaming about for a long time), write him a letter.
You can calmly talk in private, trying to explain your own position. The ability to take a step forward and realize that you are wrong will help you overcome any misunderstandings. Moreover, mistakes are common to all people.
After the breakup
The “aerobatics” of a relationship is to break up in such a way that there are no complaints or negativity on both sides. Otherwise, the resulting psychological trauma will be projected onto all relationships in the future.
The best tactic to ask your ex-boyfriend for forgiveness is diplomatic. It is important to voice your own guilt and express regret about what happened. Even if asking for forgiveness did not bring any results, you should not reproach yourself for anything. You did everything you could.
Examples of requests
The apology process is quite complex. Many people psychologically cannot tune in to it and find the right words. To pronounce them clearly, you need to prepare in advance. If necessary, they can be learned by heart.
I regret
Regret indicates that a person has admitted that they were wrong. He is ashamed that he made such a mistake, thereby causing pain to his beloved partner. For greater persuasiveness, you can use gestures, touches or glances.
I was wrong
Realizing that you are wrong and communicating this to your partner shows that your spouse is endowed with wisdom and has a mature character. Admitting guilt does not mean humiliating a woman in front of a man. Rarely anyone can do this. Few people are able to sincerely and easily admit their mistake.
READ How to return your husband to your family: advice from a psychologist
I'll fix everything
To make amends, you need to correct the situation. The partner will appreciate remorse and sincerity. The choice of method should take into account the individual characteristics of the spouse. For example, a delicious dinner, a souvenir for the car, a book by your favorite author, an invitation to a romantic date, an unforgettable night will do. The partner must feel that his wife still loves him.
I repent of what I did
There are people for whom regret is not enough. To understand how to beg forgiveness from such a husband, you need to show him deep repentance. It will cleanse the soul of the wife herself.
I need your forgiveness
It is important for some men to see their spouse’s desire to receive his forgiveness. If she shows him this, he will believe that her apology is sincere and important. To forgive or not is a personal matter for the partner.
Advice from psychologists
The topic of male grievances has been well studied by psychologists, so the useful tips that will be given below will help you achieve your goal. In order to be forgiven, a girl needs to know certain subtleties and specifics of the male soul.
Advice from psychology experts will help you choose the best tactics:
- Girls are much more flexible than guys emotionally. Therefore, if the offense is quite fresh, it can be difficult to achieve forgiveness. It is much wiser to wait a while. But there is also no need to delay the apology too much, since the guy may regard this as his beloved’s reluctance to admit his own guilt.
- If you feel guilty towards your loved one, you must say your words of apology in person. In addition, it is important to choose the right place and time.
- Under no circumstances should one be humiliated if a man remains adamant. He has the right to his own vision of the situation, including unforgiveness. Moreover, you should not beg for forgiveness and try to convince if you are not guilty. It is enough to explain why you did what you did and try to defend your position.
- Manipulation and threats are not the best way out. If you have chosen this line of behavior, it is useless to hope for reconciliation. Forcing people to make peace is somehow unreasonable.
- A request for forgiveness, even when presented correctly, is just words. You need to back them up with actions to convince the guy of your sincerity.
A few words about what you should never do. Don't give in to tears and hysterics. It doesn’t look very nice, to put it mildly, and causes many men not tenderness, but irritation. You cannot apologize and at the same time press for pity, impose yourself. If a guy loves you, then an apology and one gift will be enough. If he is deaf to your attempts to make peace, alas, he simply found a plausible excuse to get rid of you. It's time to part ways. All you have to do is let him go, you will definitely meet a worthy person.
Asking for forgiveness in poetry or prose is not at all difficult, but sometimes to do this you need to be able to overcome yourself and show courage. If done correctly and on time, you can save the relationship and happiness for both.
Why You May Not Be Taken Seriously and Rejected
Sometimes it happens that a husband rejects his wife's apology. This can happen for several reasons:
READ Jealous husband: causes and solutions to the problem
- she is not serious or sincere;
- lack of confidence in words;
- wrong time;
- a text message was sent.
In order for your spouse to take your apology words seriously, it is recommended that you choose an appropriate setting. She should be quiet, calm, nothing should distract her. A noisy place with a lot of people will not allow you to discuss the problem.
If the wife does not want to admit her guilt, then the husband will think that she is insincere and is not going to ask for forgiveness at all. He'll get even angrier.
Without realizing your mistake, trying to improve the relationship will not succeed. Sometimes women don’t understand what they did, but they ask for forgiveness. It is pointless.
You should apologize after the scandal has died down. If you shout out the word “sorry” in the midst of it, your partner will not hear it and will not take it seriously. Therefore, first everyone calms down, then they start talking.
Not everyone takes a text message containing an apology sincerely. A more effective method of forgiveness is a real conversation face to face, when the partner can see the gestures and facial expressions of the other half.
Quarrel with a guy: the first step
If a quarrel occurs with a person with whom the relationship has not yet reached the stage of living together, the girl is left alone with her thoughts. Now she will have to not only admit her guilt, but also figure out how to convey it to the young man. The easiest way is to use telephones, but who can guarantee that the offended party will be willing to pick up the phone? What other options might there be that do not require a personal meeting?
- SMS message.
His boyfriend will probably read it, because curiosity is a trait inherent in every person. And there is absolutely no need to react to the message in any way. Based on this, we can assume that writing something like “call me back” or “I miss you” is a stupid idea. These words require response actions from the addressee, which he, quite possibly, does not yet want to take. Therefore, it is best to use the message to convey your remorse and ask for forgiveness. You should not expect an answer, this is just the first step towards reconciliation. The next day you can try calling. Or use heavier artillery, which will be discussed below. - Social media. In principle, the strategy here differs little from the story with messages. Just don’t act in public and hang your apologies on your loved one’s wall.
- Do you have a desire to do something beautiful and original? You can write a regular paper letter. If a man is under thirty years old, it is unlikely that he has ever held such creations of the epistolary genre in his hands. It's a bad idea to send postcards with ready-made quatrains.
The main task is to express your feelings, so you should arm yourself with a pen and paper. You can buy an envelope at the post office and put it in a special letter box there (the instructions may be useful for those who have not encountered such things).
Let the guy talk4
He listened to you without interrupting, so you don’t stop him when it’s his turn to express his experiences and his opinion. You can’t interrupt, even if you fundamentally disagree with him, let him speak out. Perhaps you will be able to see the situation from his side. Perhaps he understood something completely wrong, and the misunderstanding between you became the cause of the conflict.
If you can’t stand it and start inserting phrases during your loved one’s monologue, then, in the end, you will start shouting at each other, and the result will be another quarrel, not reconciliation. Look at the conflict from his side. And think about how you would behave in such a situation. You, too, would like to express everything, and not keep silent about personal feelings and experiences, so give him such a chance, even if he understood everything wrong. Next, explain that things were different and calmly try to prove it.