You will suffer another time.
Still from the film “In Flight”
We don't know what happened to you. Perhaps this is a bitter separation due to the fact that she left for someone else, or unrequited love that you have been experiencing for a long time, or incompatible characters that do not allow you to be together.
Whatever it was, you were prepared to suffer, tear out your hair and complain to everyone about your difficult fate. However, all you need is to forget everything that happened and continue to breathe deeply, enjoying life in all its manifestations.
In this material we will tell you how to forget the girl you love. Naturally, it will not be easy, but with a serious approach you will succeed.
Stop following her
So, let's start with the basics, without which all further actions will be absolutely useless. If you want to truly forget her, start with your social networks. Unfollow her on Instagram, unfriend her on VKontakte, block her on Facebook, stop following her on Twitter, and finally, forget about her other pages.
Otherwise, you will become fixated on all her online activities. Every post she makes will seem like a reference to your relationship, every new like from some guy will seem like the beginning of her new relationship with someone else.
Subsequently, your paranoia will go so far that you will not be able to do your usual things and will be stuck at the screen of your gadget for a long time in endless worries.
Just unfollow her and that's it.
Start working
“I’m already working like that, geniuses”
, - you will think and you will be right. However, we mean real immersion in the work process, a sharp shift in your priorities towards your career.
Ask for more responsibilities at work (maybe you might even get promoted), try to acquire new career goals, achieve something you haven’t achieved before. In short, channel all your frustrated energy into your career. This way you will think about her much less, and maybe even forget about her.
Take off your rose-colored glasses
Many people, after breaking up with loved ones, have an irresistible urge to idealize and romanticize their past, believing that it was the best relationship of their lives. We have no doubt that you had some great times together, but be honest with yourself and admit that not everything was always smooth sailing.
So take your gadget or a piece of paper (if that's more convenient for you) and make a list of things that annoyed you about your ex. Also, do not forget to write down all the cases of your quarrels and disagreements.
Now you have a tool that will help you come down to earth whenever you want to remember how perfect your relationship was.
Just re-read it at such moments.
What is falling in love? What happens to us after a breakup?
Falling in love is directly related to body chemistry. When a person falls in love, his body releases “love hormones” in large quantities - endorphin, oxytocin, vasopressin, phenylethylamine and seratonin. These are chemical compounds that produce an analgesic effect, strengthen the immune system and, most importantly, give feelings of happiness and joy that we feel as love.
When parting with a loved one, a reverse chemical process occurs. The level of serotonin decreases - depression and apathy occur. Endorphin, which previously reduced any pain, is also not enough and acute mental pain occurs - the pain of separation .
Gradually, after some time, the body will return to normal . Remembering our affections ten years ago, we only smile. The same will happen with current attachments after some time. Over time, new sources of joy will appear.
As they say: “Time is the best medicine.”
To speed up your recovery from a failed relationship, you need to follow these tips.
No more random encounters (with her)
Just because you know where she works, where she goes on weekends, who she communicates with, and how she likes to spend time in the evenings, this does not mean that you need to use this information.
You shouldn’t think that if you allegedly accidentally walk near her place of work, she will notice you and understand how wrong she was, after which she will rush into her arms to ask for a reunion.
Most likely, you will meet, exchange some routine remarks, create a tense environment for each other, and after all this she will still think that you are desperate and will want to see you even less.
I can't stop loving my ex
True empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person's shoes. I help men in breakup situations because I went through these problems myself. My personal story began from a moment when it was scary to be alone in a room. After all, after a minute thoughts about her come flooding in, after five minutes you’re drowning in memories, and after ten you’re ready to lie at your ex’s feet and beg for forgiveness. You grab onto everything to distract yourself, but the food is tasteless, everyone kisses in the movies, and the games are not interesting.
Thoughts of separation are a prison of the past
After a breakup, a man feels locked in a cage: memories in a circle, the same gray days and no brightness ahead. During the day there is still nothing at work, but towards evening I feel either anger or fear, from which I want to run away. The man runs either to write pitiful messages to his beloved, or to complain to his loved ones. When the balance of significance is completely overwhelmed, he immediately breaks in with a bouquet and a ring, offering eternal obedience to the lady of his heart. He is also angry with the woman: she didn’t appreciate her, she betrayed her, she went to Vaska. Stop! It’s better not to think about Vasily, fantasies about their pranks with your beloved will lead to sin.
I know that in a state of crushed spring poop, you will not be able to earn your first million and make her fall in love again. I won’t offer you this nonsense. I’ll just show you where to run and how to channel your anger. You cannot get out of love addiction at this second, but right now you are able to pick up the snot and start living.
Speak out
If you've been bottling up your feelings about your breakup for a long time, it's time to let them out. To do this, you can invite your best friends to a bar, tell them everything you think about your failed love, scream a little, drink a lot (just don't overdo it), and then wake up the next day feeling like a reborn person.
Naturally, in order to completely move away from bitter thoughts, a person needs time. Allow yourself to grieve a little, just don't fall into a depressed state and be able to throw out your emotions at the right time.
How to forget the girl you love, advice from a pickup artist.
In our society, it is customary to have a negative attitude towards men, “ladiesmen” and other womanizers. Probably out of envy or something else. But, pick-up artists are not there to seduce you for the sake of stupid sex, perhaps this is the case at the very beginning, but by going through many girls you meet the one with whom you spend the rest of your life. I have many friends who are former pick-up artists and their relationships are very good, they have families and children.
Unlike men who don’t meet many girls, they are shy and feel insecure. They are precisely the ones who suffer because the girl does not accept their love.
Here the advice will be very simple, the more you communicate with girls, the more confident you become and the more self-confidence, the more girls want to communicate with you as a man. And there will be no self-pity about being abandoned or not being loved and other negativity. Everything will be fine.
In short, everything is simple, meet more girls on the street, and if you are shy, then sign up for pickup training.
However, know when to stop.
Everything in this life should be in moderation, even grief over your unhappy relationships. Therefore, if you think too much and tell everyone about your problem, you can become seriously obsessed with it.
You can talk about it endlessly, but it won't change anything. At some point, it turns out that you are simply replaying negative memories in your head and sharing them with others. Again and again.
In this case, it is better to take positive action and finally let go of the past.
Look for inspiration4
Try to think of a favorite hobby that previously brought you pleasure. Surely, being in a relationship, you completely abandoned him. Now is the time to correct the situation. Now you can even fuss around in the garage until the morning, improving your “swallow” and without fear that someone will make complaints about this.
Stop biting yourself
Don't blame yourself for the fact that you still can't get rid of thoughts about your ex. Don't blame yourself for not following our advice, for checking her Instagram to see how she's doing. You shouldn’t blame yourself for the fact that you’ve already hung around her favorite cafe several times, hoping to meet her.
Being angry with yourself in such cases is not the most productive feeling. It prevents you from forgetting your ex-girlfriend and moving towards a new life in which many interesting events and people await you.
If at the moment you are having trouble coming to terms with the thought of a breakup, remember that time is the best healer of broken hearts. Therefore, continue to live your own life, reflect (but without fanaticism), mind your own business and at some point you will realize that you cannot remember the last time you thought about your ex.
- Author: Dmitry Petrosyants
Stop loving a girl using new emotions
Body dependence is not the basis, otherwise you would consider everyone you slept with as an ex. In such a situation, all men would do is take a taxi to different addresses with bouquets in their hands. Butterfly girls, fluttering around their partners like flowers in a meadow, would be delighted with such an amount of attention. Unfortunately for them and fortunately for us, a person falls in love with emotions, and not with specific parts of the body or their combinations. More often they remember not sex with their beloved, but moments of tenderness, common adventures and cozy evenings watching a TV series.
Sniffles again? Blow your nose, go to the gym and return to the article. If you’re too lazy to exercise, you can run and howl under her window. The girl will hear the love songs of the abandoned dog, remember why she abandoned you and treat you with a bucket of slop on your head. Streams of selected shit flowing down your cheeks will sober you up and help you perceive information more carefully.
Anger as a cure for love
Now is the time to remember Vasily: the emotion of anger towards your ex will give you the strength to switch to your own life. Don’t get carried away by fantasies about their horizontal games, otherwise you’ll have to run to the gym a second time. Concentrate on understanding that a woman is enjoying life while you are suffering. When you understand that suffering is your choice, find an opportunity to receive emotions from another source.
If you want to stop loving your ex, change your environment
It is not necessary to move to another city, change job, business and gender. Changing gender is a bad idea now: yes, you can whine like a girl, but to be a woman you need other qualities. Moving and sudden changes will help, but many are not ready for this.
Start with simpler things: go to a friend’s village, chop wood, help fix the roof. Talk to your friend and other loved ones about fishing, games, types of eggplants, but not about your ex. Avoid the topic of relationships, otherwise you will become a ninny and, in addition to the girl, you will also lose a friend. The next step is to go to the river, ride a boat, ATV or snowmobile - feel the drive.
If you don’t have a friend, but you have money, go on a trip. The brain remembers only bright emotions, and from the bright ones it selects the more recent ones. Take the process seriously: fill your life with positive emotions every day and every hour. An hour or even a minute without thinking about the past is a victory. When sadness comes, get angry: she allows herself to enjoy life with or without Vasily. Why are you worse?
You went on a trip around the world, but you continue to write messages to your girl every day that she ignores? There will be no result. Exhausting yourself with training and finding new emotions are two parts of the three puzzle. The third point is your thoughts. While your head is looking at the past, you will not see a happy future.
