Midlife crisis: symptoms, causes, stages and how to survive

Psychology usually considers a midlife crisis as a not entirely standard condition, which can be short-term or long-term, associated with a reassessment of a person’s own experience after 30 years (middle age), with his emotional sphere. There are no specific dates or periods for the onset of the condition or its experience. It is in middle age (30-50 years old) that any person sooner or later begins to observe the corresponding symptoms from simple and mild depression to a feeling of injustice of fate and life.

The publication provides basic information about what a midlife crisis (MAC) is, how to survive it without problems and consequences, and also provides advice from psychologists.

Midlife crisis - what is it?

It has already been shown that a midlife crisis is a special emotional state that middle-aged people (30-50 years old) face. During the period of high risk of SWS, it should be understood that some people experience acute manifestations of symptoms, while others may feel their superficial effects.

For people facing a midlife crisis, the following aspirations are typical:

• change of world view. Falling into this crisis state, a person begins to overestimate his previous life experience;
• memories of missed opportunities, reflections on the future. A person facing a midlife crisis remembers his youth and supposedly realizes missed opportunities. In the worst case, he may begin to see his old age as a period of absolute decline, one that will definitely and at a specific time end in death. Clarifications like “someday” fade into the background and even into the background, that is, a clear idea is formed in a person’s thoughts about the “real” timing of his death.

The crisis state in question occurs at different ages in different people. Usually it can “attack” a person in the period from 30 to 50 years. Psychologists note that all accompanying manifestations may have different strengths. For some, the symptoms of SWS are bright and strong, for others they proceed almost unnoticed. This complicates not only diagnosis, but also attempts to establish at least average, not so large, boundaries of the risk period.

Are you familiar with the condition in question?

Yes, not by hearsay. I myself (myself) went through this.

20%

No, fortunately. But everything is ahead (I’m already over 30; I’m not yet 30).

20%

No. I miraculously overcame (overcame) middle age without consequences.

20%

Can not say. I sometimes think that it has already “attacked” me. At other times it seems that everything is different.

40%

Voted: 5

Find a new way to be a leader

The word “crisis” is translated from Greek as a turning point, a turning point. A crisis is an opportunity for transformation, and first of all, our inner component, character, needs it. Reconsider your experience and understanding of the ongoing processes, find a new point of support.

For example, a leader used to rely on energy and intelligence. But with age, energy goes away, and the gap in intelligence with employees narrows. This means that the paradigm needs to be updated - now the source of leadership can be wisdom drawn from real life experience. She is the best source of resilience, self-control, compassion, caring and creativity during a crisis.

How long can a midlife crisis last?

The duration may vary for men and women. This is influenced by a number of factors. First, let us emphasize that everything can end in a matter of months, or it can last for many years.

Here are the factors influencing the speed of the midlife crisis in people without reference to gender:

• the depth of immersion in one’s own thoughts about the value and importance of past experience, about the proximity of the inevitable (aging and death). The deeper a person goes into the past or future, the harder it becomes for him to live here and now. If reflection and analysis as interrelated processes in the context of SWR proceed quickly and without a person’s self-reproach, the crisis will pass quickly. The situation is the opposite, if attempts to understand oneself and escape from the present are regular and stretch out over time;
• the speed of restructuring of the body and the person’s attitude to this. Psychologists note that it is more difficult for women due to hormonal disruptions and other pronounced signs of the “launch” of the aging process. However, men can also be acutely worried about everything related to these processes. Here it is most fair to talk about the levels of self-esteem and resistance to stress against the background of changes in physical health. People with good and healthy self-esteem, resistant to stress, which is understandable, experience everything easier and faster (compared to people for whom these qualities are not characteristic);
• status and achievements. This is not a rule or even an “average”, but the factor carries some weight. For example, successful women and men cope with crises more easily. But not always: it has already been shown that some have a tendency to underestimate their achievements, sometimes to abandon them. Even if these achievements are highly appreciated by others (colleagues, relatives, friends). Another example is a person in the status of “happy parent” and a person who strives to become a parent, but for objective reasons is not able to have children. The first one will endure crisis manifestations more easily.

In fact, what should be especially noted is that there are too many factors influencing the speed and complexity (lack of complexity) when experiencing the period under review. We have shown the main ones, which, according to psychologists, most influence the characteristics of the midlife crisis in both men and women.

Diet

Diet for the nervous system

• Efficacy: therapeutic effect after 2 months
• Timing: constantly
• Cost of food: 1700-1800 rubles per week

Nutrition should be as varied and healthy as possible. It is important not only to eat healthy food, but also to try to structure your diet so that the dishes are tasty and enjoyable.

The menu should include the following products and dishes:

• Rose hip decoction, citrus fruits, sauerkraut.
• Nuts, seeds, sea fish.
• Lean meat.
• Cereals, cereals.
• Green vegetables.
• Honey, dried fruits.

It is advisable to drink less coffee and strong tea, and keep alcohol to a minimum.

Causes of midlife crisis

Here are the 3 most common groups of reasons that “push” people into a crisis:

1. Physiological . An example is sudden changes in physiology. What was previously easy for a person is becoming more and more difficult. He looks back, understands this, analyzes and naturally feels the decline of his own strength, which becomes less and less over time.
2. Psychological . This is precisely the rethinking of values ​​that is characteristic of people facing a midlife crisis. And also about thoughts concerning the future. It is all reflection and analysis that are the factors that provoke the development of a crisis emotional state. If, for example, a person comes to the conclusion that his meaning in life is empty, if there is none, he falls into a conditional risk group.
3. Social . Here we will show everything with examples: immaturity, lack of friends, bad relationships with others, problems at work - all this and much more can lead to the development or exacerbation of problems.

Because during a crisis, each person begins to evaluate differently the achievements, successes, heights that he managed or did not manage to conquer, there is a high risk of combining this conditional factor with others. Taken together, they can strengthen or weaken the overall impact of the condition on the individual.

What reasons do you think most strongly influence the development of the condition in question?

The first ones. After all, our body is closely connected with our psychological and emotional spheres.

28.57%

Second. Psychology is such a thing.

42.86%

It seems that the third group is strongest. Many people depend on the opinions of others.

28.57%

Voted: 7

Analyze the path you've already taken

If you have two or three decades of work experience, then you should start with a kind of audit, says motivational speaker and CEO of the consulting company 20-first Aviva Wittenberg-Cox. Most often, people do not try to rethink their experience, but only live it, and therefore do not understand how to transfer it into tomorrow.

Our experience, the expert says, is the only thing we have at all. By analyzing the events of the past, you will be able to see your so-called life arc, that is, the main and desired path. And start practicing active self-discovery. You must find out what made you, you. Simply put, take time to analyze your life, think about what actions made you who you are today. At the same time, look for the events that led to the crisis. Once you understand the context of what is happening, you can outline ways out. Experts offer a simple technique that can be used for this. It is better to answer questions in writing.

1. Divide your life into segments with an interval of 7 years: 7, 14, 21, 28, 35 and so on. What valuable lessons have you learned from each time period that you have lived through, who taught them to you and influenced you? Can you think of one metaphor for the life experiences you have accumulated to date?
2. What's happening now? What do you spend your time on every day? Which three things in life do you value today, and which three things would you like to get rid of?

Turn the result of this analysis into an action plan - for example, if in the past you were able to find some actions that brought joy, you should add them to your diary for the near future. Start dreaming about tomorrow, make a wish list.

Stages of the crisis period

There are many classifications and approaches to the periodization of the midlife crisis. We find the periodization proposed by Jim Conway remarkable. Being a doctor of psychological sciences, he was able to identify the following stages (stages, 6):

1. Denial . At this stage, a person strives with all his might to prove to himself and those around him that there can be no talk of any crisis. At the same time, increasing symptoms are often attributed to the weather, fatigue, or difficulties in the family or at work.
2. Anger . This stage is characterized by the fact that everything that a person tried to escape from suddenly overtakes him and gives rise to anger. Men and women at the stage of anger become irritable, aggressive, and sometimes begin to think about quitting everything.
3. Overacting . It's kind of like teenage rebellion. At this stage, a person begins to strive to have time to do something that, as it seems to him, is very important.
4. Depression . This is both a stage and a symptom of a midlife crisis. Psychologists note that a person is pushed towards depression by the realization that everything he is trying to change concerns only external spheres. The internal ones remain unchanged and continue to obey the “laws” of the SWR. This makes a person experience a feeling of extreme oppression, sometimes indifference to himself and the world around him.
5. Detachment . At this stage, a person immerses himself as much as possible. It is at this moment that he begins to deal with his thoughts, anxieties, desires, and experiences.
6. Adoption . This is about a person accepting the “new” self and again starting to live in the present, and not in the past or future.

Common Mistakes

The first and most important mistake is the desire to ignore the fact of problems. No one can hide, run away, or escape from this state. Only struggle will help.

It was shown using the example of men and women what they can begin to do in an emotional crisis. Based on this information, we will show some common mistakes they make during a “collision” with a crisis. Here's what the “losers” do to overcome SWR:

• stoop to betrayal. People who cheat on their partners not only further delay the exit point from the crisis, but also cause pain to other people. When it comes to self-analysis, most often the fact of committed betrayals only begins to weigh more heavily;
• the crisis begins to flood. Alcoholism, drugs - everything that only allows you to drown out experiences for a while. And something that worsens overall health. For some, alcohol, for example, only causes an aggravated experience of all the problems caused by the crisis;
• They begin to succumb to emotions, act thoughtlessly and unreasonably. This is about a semblance of teenage rebellion, when at the moment of realizing one’s own stupidity and “blindness” in relation to something or someone, it “covers” even more.

There are a lot more mistakes, to be honest. Everything is too individual. If you cannot cope with a midlife crisis or notice this inability in someone, please make an appointment with a psychologist or advise someone else to do so. Otherwise, a chronic form may develop that will last for several years.

How to help those experiencing a midlife crisis?

Family, friends, colleagues - all these and other people surrounding a person facing a problem can easily help him. Care, support and love, willingness to help and come to the rescue in time - all this is necessary for anyone who is faced with SWS.

If you would like to help someone facing the emotional state in question, please read the section of the article “How to Survive a Midlife Crisis?” There we presented advice from practicing psychologists with which you can easily overcome a negative state.

Treatment with folk remedies

Folk remedies can become auxiliary methods aimed at overcoming anxiety and generally strengthening the body.

• It is recommended to regularly drink herbal teas, which may include valerian, mint, chamomile, yarrow, lemon balm, strawberry, etc.
• A decoction of rose hips, hawthorn, and cranberry juice is useful.
• It is recommended to consume honey before bed, which helps normalize sleep.
• Remedy with dried fruits. Mix equal parts of dried apricots, prunes, raisins and walnuts (100 g each), chop everything and add 50 g of honey. Store the product in the refrigerator, use 1 tbsp. l. 2-3 times a day.

FAQ

The following are answers to questions related to the topic of the article.

What are age crises?

In short, these are periods of change in a person’s worldview, periods of change in his views and aspirations. During age-related crises, attitudes, moral guidelines, activities and more change.

What are age-related crises?

Too many of them. Psychologists distinguish the following groups of age-related crises: crises of childhood; teenage crises; crises of adolescence and middle age. There are too many approaches to periodization and classification. Their consideration would require a separate article.

What do you mean by “spiritual crisis”?

A spiritual crisis is, first of all, a loss of spirit. This is about a situation where a person experiences moral decline. Psychologists note that any age-related crisis has individual signs of spiritual stagnation. To better understand the essence of things, try reading the section of the article “Midlife crisis - what is it?” This will help you understand what characterizes moral failure.

What age is considered average?

The most general point of view is this: the age ranges from 30 to 50-60 years.

What crises do men have?

All the same as for women. Gender characteristics do not affect the tendency to emotional crises. A striking example is discussed in the article. If interested, you can read the article to understand what this crisis is.

Are there consequences of a midlife crisis?

Everything has consequences. And whether they will be positive (a new business, a new hobby, a change in image for the better and more) or negative (prolonged depression, loss of self-confidence or the meaning of life, etc.) depends only on how competently a person builds his “defense” faced with trouble. We wrote about fighting methods in the article.