What topics are best to talk about with shy boys?
It happens that boys behave unpredictably and are sometimes difficult to understand. They are either pompous and loud, or incredibly quiet and shy. With the first ones everything is clear, these guys are trying to show off and get attention.
But what if you met an incredibly modest person? You like him, but communication does not go well, since the young man does not make contact well. Here you have to understand that you need to take the initiative into your own hands and start conversations yourself.
Consider the following topics:
If you find some common ground, approve his ideas on this topic, praise him. But behave naturally, don’t bow, don’t put pressure, don’t manipulate. Be interested in what he lives and is interested in, it brings you closer together.
In this video, Pavel Denisov will tell you about 5 secrets of modest guys, every girl needs to know them:
Pay close attention to his body language
We have already talked about how to see obvious signs of attention and recognize love in a completely closed guy. But what if he behaves completely normally: he doesn’t show his cards to you, but he doesn’t mask his feelings with the utmost caution? This is the most difficult case when you will have to be as attentive as possible and catch all the signals coming from him, even if he did not try to send them.
Without exception, all guys, like girls, subconsciously signal their sympathy for a person
. This can include involuntary timid glances that you throw at each other against your own will. Trembling knees and slurred speech, a deep blush on the cheeks... But there are also less obvious signs that also relate to body language.
If a guy likes you, he will subconsciously reveal
all their movements are towards you. Imagine that you are communicating in a large, lively company: no matter who he talks to or who he addresses, if there is sympathy, the toes of his shoes will definitely be turned in your direction. This applies not only to shoes, but to hands and posture in general - it will be directed at you
, as if conducive to an open conversation.
In addition, a guy in love always unconsciously repeats the facial expressions of his object of desire
– smiles, frowns, bites his lip, and so on. But even if you haven’t noticed any of the signs described in the article, don’t despair: all guys are different, and they also show their feelings in different ways. One day you will definitely notice something that will mark the beginning of a sincere and trusting relationship between you.
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Video: What a girl looks like through the eyes of a guy in love
Attention, TODAY only! At school age, almost everyone hides the feelings that arise in relation to one or another classmate or neighbor.
This is repeated more than once or twice, and over time this secrecy becomes a habit.
It has been noticed that men in general are noticeably shyer than women.
However, it's not just shyness. There is also usually uncertainty and fear present.
Try to find the reason for his behavior
Once you understand it, you will be able to build a line of attack. Most likely the reasons for his behavior lie in the following:
- He is an introvert and it is normal for him to be reserved. He behaves this way because of a feeling of discomfort in society, feeling confident only in private. You will have to come to terms with this, but once you gradually get into his comfort zone, you will be able to rotate in it calmly. The main thing is not to put pressure, but to pursue a targeted policy;
- Or maybe he likes you , so he closed himself off. He is afraid to demonstrate his feelings for some reason, so he avoids active communication;
- Or vice versa, he doesn't like you . Then his isolation is the result of the fact that he cannot speak openly about it, preferring to simply avoid you.
Reasons why a man is embarrassed by a woman's presence
In fact, there are many reasons: from a man’s own fictitious (or not so) complexes to a deliberately chosen manner of behavior or social “mask”. Possible options:
Self-doubt and fear of rejection
When a guy meets a nice girl, the thought comes to his mind: “We won’t succeed” or “I’m not worthy of her.” It takes up all the space in his head, you can think about it for hours, imagining your future family life and already figuring out how to rationally budget. However, at the thought of recognition, all enthusiasm evaporates somewhere. Fear overcomes: what if, after declaring her sympathy, the girl will respond with a banal refusal?
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Many men are afraid of this. They are rather afraid not of the phenomenon of refusal itself, but are worried about being ridiculed by a woman, because this will hurt their natural sense of self-esteem. That is why often on the part of a guy who has some feelings for a girl, there is a passive, one might even say cold, attitude, indifference to her problems. This explains why a man is shy in the presence of a woman: he is afraid to reveal his feelings.
Failures in past love affairs
A bad experience is also an experience. If a guy has been refused more than once, then the pattern of his behavior is clear: refusals become commonplace, and few people like to engage in routine. When meeting a beautiful girl, the guy already knows for sure and, most importantly, expects another negative answer. All the passion to seek reciprocity disappears.
Inexperience
This is already the other side of the coin of the previous point. What can I say, a man simply has no way to get an algorithm of actions! Afraid of saying something stupid or, conversely, appearing tactless with inappropriate questions, he unconsciously becomes embarrassed and blushes in the presence of the beauty.
The guy, most likely, even understands that he can get the status of a single bachelor for a long period of time with his hands always sweating from fear and awkwardness, if he does not begin to take the first steps in getting closer to at least someone. However, it is difficult to move the load from a dead point, and conquering the peaks of a pickup truck is postponed until later. Again and again…
Insecurity about one's own appearance.
This point echoes the first. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) a person does not choose which face to be born with. When a man falls in love with a girl, he begins to pay more attention to his appearance: dissatisfaction with what was most likely not even taken into account before increases exponentially.
This is where the uncertainty comes from when a lady of the heart appears on the horizon. Not very comparable things come to mind: it seems, what kind of reciprocity is there when she looks like a model from Milan fashion shows, and his ears stick out, or his nose is like a potato?
Not ready for a relationship
Even if a man claims that he is 100% ready to devote himself to a close relationship, the subconscious gives back. Even if every night a decision is made to confess and turn your soul inside out, at the first appearance of a girl all these decisions disappear somewhere, as if they never happened, and in their place comes embarrassment and tightness.
Also, the reason for a man’s embarrassment may be his unwillingness to take responsibility and control over his actions. Many women like smart guys with leadership qualities who are willing to take responsibility for their actions and make quick decisions in stressful situations. But not all guys fit this mold. The man understands that he does not correspond to the parameters imposed by society, and therefore does not come up with anything better than to “keep his head down.” All the same, in his opinion, nothing will come of it.
Inability to understand hints
It is easier for men to analyze direct text, without hints. If a girl sends an emoticon during correspondence, it is really difficult for a guy to understand whether this is due to flirting on her part or whether it is just a polite gesture. If she is the first one to ask you to go out on the weekend, should you prepare for a date or a friendly outing? Due to differences between the sexes in understanding hidden hints, there is a lot of confusion and misunderstanding. This is also one of the reasons why a man feels shy in the presence of a woman.
How to get a shy guy excited?
Try to do the following while he is shy to speak directly - use social networks and SMS. We can say with 100% accuracy that in this way you will be able to get to know him better and encourage him to communicate.
Next, proceed according to the circumstances:
- When you feel that he trusts you, set up a date. Let it be a crowded place, a cafe or a city park;
- Let him feel your interest, ask more questions, but at the same time behave with restraint, do not allow vulgarity. Try to create a calm, cozy atmosphere, let the person relax in it.
It turns out that you need to babysit him like a child. This is true in this case. But don’t worry, he won’t always be like this, as soon as you get closer, everything will change, communication will move to a new level. And with others, let him be shy, this is not at all bad.
Unacceptable things to do when communicating with a timid guy
When communicating with a modest guy, it is important to remember that he is a vulnerable person, so you should not further injure his pride. If a guy is very shy, a harsh voice and a raised voice will simply scare him away. People prone to timidity categorically cannot stand shouting and withdraw into themselves if this happens.
A modest guy who is embarrassed to even talk to a woman is sensitive to all sorts of ridicule, so before you joke, think about whether this will hurt his pride. A timid man may have a wonderful sense of humor, but ridicule directed at him will be unpleasant and incomprehensible to him.
You should also avoid criticism, especially sharp and incorrect criticism. Modest guys have a very hard time when they are judged and their shortcomings are pointed out, so it is better to avoid such moments. The best option would be a subtle hint that the guy is doing something wrong, but there should be no derogatory criticism.
Another important trait is not to ask a shy person about his feelings. A woman who is distinguished by wisdom will herself understand that the chosen one is interested in her, even if the man is withdrawn. Asking a timid man directly what he feels for the lady of his heart is an impossible task and sometimes useless: his shy nature simply will not allow him to be straightforward with his chosen one.
To build a relationship with a shy person, you need to show patience, tact and respect, and then the timid guy will certainly become bolder and be able to make his beloved happy.
What should you not do?
The main thing is not to make the following mistakes and everything will work out:
- Don't talk about your future . This applies to all men in general, but especially to modest men. He doesn’t yet know how to just be around, what to talk about, and far-reaching plans are the least of his worries right now;
- Do not forget, if isolation is a feature of his personality, do not become intrusive . He needs to be alone periodically. Therefore, keep a reasonable distance, it will even cheer him up somewhat if you sometimes disappear;
And don't make me jealous. Well, you won’t achieve anything here, you’ll only push more people away. On the contrary, try to praise and support him, unobtrusively, carefully.
Analysis of the negative
Carefully analyzing negative situations will only make your shyness worse. Try to immediately analyze everything that happened, draw conclusions and move on without looking back. If it makes you feel better, write down everything that happened. Analyze your emotions and actions, think about what you will do next time in order to avoid such embarrassment.
Perceive the world philosophically, try to be positive, act decisively and don’t give up. You will definitely succeed, and even much faster than you plan.
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How can I make him more relaxed?
If we are talking about intimacy and you lack initiative on his part in this regard, you may have to take it upon yourself for the first time. But you will have to act very carefully and only after it becomes clear that he wants this , but is simply being modest.
How to determine this?
- The look, he undresses you with his eyes. Also draws attention to the lips, hips, chest;
- Tries to touch casually. Even the most shy ones cannot resist their instincts and will not miss the opportunity to even slightly touch the object of adoration;
- When speaking, the timbre of his voice may change to soft with a slight hoarseness.
If you notice the above-mentioned behavior in your gentleman, you can try to get closer:
- Try to respond to his touch, show that it is pleasant, you don’t mind;
- Touch him yourself, first jokingly, then, if he is not afraid, more persistently;
- Talk about your friends' relationships and how they show each other feelings. Using their example, you can try to figure out what kind of behavior you are expecting.
Now your task is to show your readiness for intimacy and provoke him into it without scaring him. Conversations gradually become more frank, movements become more tempting.
If you meet a shy guy, this is a gift, not a punishment. If there is a certain desire, patience and wisdom, any girl will be able to re-educate him. The main thing is not to overdo it, so as not to regret it later.
Attitude of others
You must learn one truth: you cannot please everyone without exception. All people are different, often they do not suit each other at the energy level. Remember, you also have friends who don’t particularly appeal to you. And do they feel less happy because of this? If you don’t impress some, you will like others, there’s no problem with that.
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Features of shy men
Shyness takes different forms and is expressed in different ways. The same guy is sometimes able to jump into the river to save a kitten, but does not find the strength to approach the girl and get acquainted... He works as a rescuer, carries children out of burning houses, but does not know how to swear in public institutions in response to the arbitrariness of unscrupulous officials... How does this happen? Let's name the external signs of shyness in men:
- "Can't be seen or heard." It seems that the person is incapable of decisive action: he is downtrodden, quiet, constrained in his movements. It’s a paradox, but shy men are capable of feats even more than “roosters” who flaunt their brutality, pumped up figure and other dubious “advantages”.
- Passivity in communication. Shyness is a quality that makes it difficult for a guy to find an interlocutor and, even more so, a life partner. He gives the initiative to those around him. He waits for people to get to know him, and does not make contact first. It is important that shy people do not avoid communication, but rather want it. Only they are not able to be the first to decide to talk with a stranger (or with a not very close “acquaintance”).
- Delicacy. It’s a nice trait, but you can only recognize it through communication. He will not be rude, will not raise sensitive topics (and if he does, he will carefully avoid them), and will not impose himself. But he will listen to stories about your problems, sympathize, and will not demand anything in return.
- Low self-esteem and anxiety. At least it seems so at first. And the man himself can be sure of this. Shyness is often associated with thoughts about one’s own unattractiveness, “inferiority.” Therefore, such a person is rarely given high positions or public recognition. And the woman whom he has secretly loved for many years will marry another without knowing about his feelings.
- Stability. It's difficult to say whether this is a good trait or a bad one. She just is. A man does not want to change his life, he clings to what he already has. Any changes are painful. He will not look for a better job, he will not (most likely) decide to open his own business... But look from the other side - such a man will not cheat, he will not be the first to divorce.
- Mirroring of actions and feelings. But here’s what they said at the beginning: the guy is usually timid and downtrodden, it’s difficult for him to communicate with representatives of public institutions (and even with store clerks). But in extreme conditions, hitherto dormant resources seem to be activated. Only the opportunity rarely appears, and in everyday life it is not particularly useful.
- Vulnerability and sensuality. Another “feminine” feature. The emotions of modest people are deep and persistent. Therefore, it is difficult for them to deceive and hide something from a loved one (if one suddenly appears). And another plus - thanks to such features, you can turn a shy man into a wonderful partner in bed “for yourself.” He will not be selfish; he will try to please you first, and then himself.
This is a complete list of the main qualities of a shy man. Not all of them manifest themselves in a particular representative. And you need to get to know the person well in order to notice the described qualities. Usually, modesty has to be corrected, because, as mentioned earlier, in ordinary life it causes nothing but problems. How to do it? First, it would be nice to understand the reasons for the formation of shyness.
The bad qualities of shy guys that scare away all the girls
It is easy for representatives of the fairer sex to communicate with such men. But there are a few bad qualities that will turn off anyone, not just the girl you like:
- The problem is that these guys don't have the so-called backbone. They can't do anything. They often prefer to stand on the sidelines rather than take center stage.
- Shy guys are very accommodating and will give in to any problem to avoid conflict. Even if someone insults them, they will pretend as if they don't hear it, although in reality they are exploding with rage inside.
- Shy guys are more likely to back out of a fight than to fight. Although they tell everyone that fighting won't solve anything, in reality such guys are just weaklings.
- They are too slow. In order to get to know a shy guy better, a girl must have a lot of patience. When a beautiful girl can get any confident guy, will she be interested in advising shy men on how to act?
- Shy guys don't trust other people, especially other members of the stronger sex. If some leftist guy tried to hit on your girlfriend, would you have the courage to stand up and put him in his place? Alas, shy men are not capable of this.
How does shyness appear?
Overcoming shyness is difficult, since it does not appear suddenly, but over many years it strengthens and takes root. What leads to it? The reasons for stable, ingrained shyness are most often the following.
Melancholic type of temperament
Unlike character, temperament cannot be changed, since it is determined by the peculiarities of biochemical processes in the body and is finally formed by the age of 12–13 as the nervous system develops. It is convenient for melancholic people not to stand out, to behave as quietly and inconspicuously as possible. They are afraid of changing their usual way of life, and conflicts, swearing and high responsibility are worse than fire for them.
It is possible to instill social skills in a melancholic person. Learn to communicate without visible embarrassment, too. A man with this type of temperament will always feel discomfort in situations where he is required to make a decision, insist on his own, or come into contact with strangers.
It is important that next to the guy there is a truly strong and active person who can constantly give him a kick and make him move. But do this gently and without pressure, under which the melancholic will only close himself off even more, isolate himself and become convinced of his worthlessness.
Overprotection from parents (usually mothers)
Determination is inextricably linked with taking responsibility. If, from childhood, a boy is accustomed to having everything decided for him (although he himself may not want this), shyness and anxiety will become persistent personality traits. It’s enough to look at the guy’s mother to understand everything: this is usually an authoritarian woman who considers herself right and does not recognize other people’s interests, opinions, and desires.
Mothers who raise boys based solely on their ideas about life grow up to be uninitiative, amorphous, quiet boys. It won't necessarily be that way. But, if the manner of upbringing is superimposed on the basis of the same melancholic temperament, this result is inevitable.
As in the previous case, you will have to take the initiative in communicating with a man. In general, he will be waiting for this. It is normal for him to submit and obey a woman from childhood. So use it...
Compensation for a harsh and “cold” childhood
Shyness often grows due to the general coldness of the environment in childhood. There are boys who have to grow up like weeds, completely without the support of their parents and loved ones. And another situation is that from an early age a boy is required to “be a man.” He has not yet learned to cope with his problems, process stress and experiences, and they demand from him “not to complain,” “not to cry,” “to be independent.”
Modesty is a plus, not a minus
In the modern world, modesty is more of a plus than a minus. When persistent, pushy young men are everywhere, thinking that arrogance is the second happiness, a shy young man is a rarity, a diamond. When the men around you want to “show off” and show superiority, quiet modest men remember the important human qualities that girls value: respect, care, maintaining distance, politeness, courtesy, patience, attention to detail. I hope my experience will help you figure out what to do if you want to win and keep a shy gentleman.
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Approaching a Shy Man
Each situation, as shown above, requires its own approach and correction methods. There are also general ways to interact with a guy who is not used to expressing himself decisively. Which recommendations are most useful and effective in all cases?
- Frankness, trust, honesty. You can't be disingenuous with shy people. Spinning at will is an unforgivable meanness, although it is very simple. A man will get rid of indecisiveness and modesty if he feels that he can trust you. It will probably take a long time to gain his trust. But the result is definitely worth the effort.
- Positive interaction. Shy people have a hard time taking criticism. The more they are criticized, the more they close themselves off, plunge into a cocoon woven with their own hands, thicken the brick wall... Whatever comparisons you want, use those comparisons. The essence is the same: encouragement, praise, constructive interaction and mutual assistance are useful. Ridicule, insults, and devaluation of his actions are harmful.
- If there is banter, then only good ones. There are people who do not see the shores when joking. Wit is not always good. The angrier and more accurate the joke, the greater the gap between the man and you will end up. So, know when it’s better to remain silent and not make barbs about him.
- Take the initiative. In many matters you will have to take responsibility yourself. A shy guy thinks for a long time before starting a conversation. What can we say about the beginning of a serious relationship, wedding, entertainment, travel. Decide for yourself - and he will be grateful. Of course, you still have to make the final decision together. But you will have to be the initiator.
- Introduce new things into life gradually. As we found out earlier, a man with pronounced shyness does not easily tolerate change. If you want to change something, do it slowly.
Let's look at the example of moving to another city.
- Start by talking about how picturesque the streets are, how cheap the real estate is, how many quiet, beautiful parks are, how kind the people are, how high the salaries are.
- Proceed to visualization - show photos (unobtrusively slip in photos of friends who live or have visited that city) of the apartment offered for sale or rent. Or perhaps his favorite musical group is from there? Then remind him how often this group performs there.
- Go on a trip together. For now for a few days. “Just to visit.” Choose in advance places where a man will like you. Let him have only positive impressions.
- Drive wedges to the crossing. Carefully, gently, unobtrusively. When the guy already knows what this city is like, how nice and calm it is, he will tolerate this idea with less complications.
A similar scenario applies to any event. If you want to “add” new friends (your own) to a joint vacation, everything is done approximately the same. If you want to have a child, repeat the algorithm. A man must get used to the upcoming changes, then he will endure the event itself less painfully. And most importantly, he will decide to take action, overcoming the ever-interfering shyness.
Signs of a shy guy
The friend finally got tired of the questions about Mr. X, she said that they had been studying together for a long time, and listed several signs of a classmate’s shyness. I'll tell you now. Do you think my friend is right, the guy is really timid?
4.1. Sight
Avoids gaze, feels constrained. When she asked about homework, he looked in the other direction: at the table, the floor, out the window. The young man did not look him in the eyes.
4.2. Blush on the cheeks
Blushes. One day, the head of the group (a beautiful, attractive girl) approached our hero and invited him to a university party, he politely refused, a bright blush appeared on his face.
4.3. Quiet and slurred speech
Stutters. Despite the fact that he has oratorical qualities, he answers in classes clearly and correctly, during a personal dialogue with a woman he finds it difficult to connect two words, his speech becomes quiet and unintelligible. Having analyzed the signs, the conclusion is this: the object of my desire is quite shy. I will find an approach to a shy guy!
How to behave if you meet a shy guy
The beginning of a relationship often lays the foundation for its future. And the girl’s correct behavior increases the chances of long-term communication, which will move to a more serious level. But what should you do if you meet a shy guy? Should we maintain a given tone and not rush things, or should we be persistent in developing relationships?
The answers to these questions depend on many factors that you should consider when deciding how to communicate with a shy guy.
What should an ideal guy be like?
Shy young people have many positive qualities. They are more sensitive and caring, and girls enjoy their company. But despite this, the ideal guy is one who:
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- can protect;
- able to provide;
- will seek the girl's favor.
These three points are pretty simple, but these are exactly the requirements where almost every shy guy fails. And after that, with this fashion, a person immediately moves from the status of a boyfriend to the status of a best friend.
If a guy is very shy, possible reasons
So, when choosing a behavior strategy, first of all, you need to determine why the young man is shy. There are three main reasons for this behavior that girls should know:
- Trait. If a guy is very shy not only with you, but also in any company, then he is most likely an introvert. For such people, isolation is a characteristic feature; they feel more comfortable alone with themselves than among people. Their immediate circle is very narrow, and you will have to accept isolation until you get into it.
- Doesn't want to show his affection. In fact, the stronger sex is often shy before beauty. Therefore, if you see that a guy is shy, it is quite possible that he simply does not want to demonstrate his feelings too clearly. Just give him time and he will open up to you.
- Doesn't like you, but doesn't want to talk about it directly. It is very rare for young people to decide to have an open conversation and, even more so, it is not so easy to tell someone that you don’t like them. Therefore, it is quite possible that his isolation is just a way to push you away without initiating a break in the relationship.
These are the three most common reasons why a guy acts withdrawn with you. Before deciding how to behave further, it is necessary to find out exactly which of these factors determines the behavior of a young person.
Why are shy guys better than confident young people?
First of all, they are good friends. They are good listeners and very attentive. Secondly, these are good lovers. Girls feel strong next to them.
Many representatives of the fair sex like guys who are shy at first, but soon, after a few conversations, open up. They definitely don't like young people who are constantly shy. But such people are rare, because even the most modest men liberate themselves immediately after a few conversations.
How to find out what a shy guy likes
If a young man is in no hurry to demonstrate his feelings, how can you find out what he wants from your communication? Signs indicating sympathy on the part of the guy will help with this.
- You often catch his eye on you, but he looks away when he sees that you have noticed it.
- Look at his hands. If they are directed in your direction, this is a clear sign of sympathy on a subconscious level. It is these signs of attention that are the most sincere.
- Behavior control. A guy will not tolerate rudeness in the presence of a girl he likes. Therefore, if a young man has clear speech without filler words, a neat appearance and a modest posture, it is worth thinking about whether this is his usual behavior or a way to impress you?
- Does he straighten his hair or clothes? Another sign of sympathy that should not be ignored.
- Reaction to touch. If a young man involuntarily shudders when he touches you, this is a sure signal of sympathy on his part. Even if after that he quickly moved away, you have already managed to evaluate his reaction to you!
Signs that a man at work or boss likes you: description
Leaders always feel confident because they are in charge. Therefore, signs that a male boss likes you will clearly appear. At first he will simply smile and look intently, and then he will start paying compliments and asking you to stay after work to complete things.
Quite quickly he tries to transfer communication into an informal setting. By the way, often even the boss begins to give bonuses for no reason or even an increase. At the same time, if he really likes you, then all the same signs will be visible as in any other situation.
The guy is very shy, what should I do?
In order for your communication not only to continue, but also to move to a new level, it is necessary to overcome the young man’s isolation.
So, how to win over a shy guy?
- Start communicating via SMS or social networks. The lack of personal contact will allow the young man to relax.
- When you decide it's time for face-to-face communication, proceed with caution. Think in advance about what exactly you will talk about during the date, and don’t forget to find out more about his interests. Such preparation will help to win his genuine interest in you.
- A lot depends on the first meeting. Therefore, if you are interested in how to loosen up a guy if he is shy, make a date in a public place. A conversation over a cup of coffee in a cozy cafe where there are other visitors will be much preferable for a young man than a walk in the park alone.
- Ask more questions. Everyone loves to feel interested in their personality, and for a shy guy this is especially important. In addition, this tactic is also useful for the girl; she learns more about her chosen one. At the same time, avoid provocative questions, behave calmly and balanced. This way you will create an atmosphere of comfort that will help the young man to relax.
- Never ask the question, “Are you always this modest?” This will only put the guy in an awkward position and make him want to end the meeting as quickly as possible.
This is what the list of first steps looks like in the question of what to do if a guy is shy.
Hygiene and style
If you don't feel confident, start with personal hygiene and neat, well-chosen clothing. Take a shower morning and evening and make it a habit to take care of yourself. Clothes must be clean and of high quality. If you cannot choose it yourself, seek help from specialists. They will choose the best style for your age and appearance, which will allow you to increase your level of self-confidence.
How to consolidate success
It’s not enough to meet a handsome young man and understand that he also liked you. It is necessary to build a line of behavior so that the relationship moves into a more serious phase.
- Don't forget that girls are the weaker sex. Let the young man feel like your protector and helper. Ask him for help in a matter that he clearly understands. After the problem is resolved, do not forget to thank him and sincerely rejoice at how lucky you are to have him.
- Find some common hobby. Not only will this give you the opportunity to spend more time together, but it will also give you more common ground. This means that you will become much closer by doing a common thing.
- Try to get to know his friends. Show yourself in the best light by making it clear that you are the best choice for your guy. Don't forget that the smaller the circle of close people, the more valuable their opinion is.
A lot in a relationship depends on the girl; your correct behavior will be the key to long-term communication with a shy guy.
How love is born
Before a man truly falls in love, he will first go through certain stages.
- Assessment. When meeting a girl, a guy examines her appearance, determines the degree of attractiveness, and tries on the role of a partner for her. As you know, the first impression is formed by appearance.
- The emergence of interest in a girl. There is a need for closer acquaintance and communication. There is an interest in getting to know the young lady better.
- Attraction. At this stage, the young man begins to court his chosen one and looks at her reaction.
- Impression. The guy is trying to show his best qualities, doing everything in order to make the best impression on the girl, to amaze her.
- Belief. Feelings become stronger. The chosen one occupies all thoughts in my head and begins to dream. The guy realizes that he constantly thinks about the girl, cannot concentrate on other things, all thoughts are only about her.
- Repeated persuasion. This stage is characterized by the understanding that the young lady was enchanted, and the idea of a serious relationship is born.
- Love. A serious romance begins, the feelings are very strong.
What not to do
If you notice clear signs that your communication is moving to a new level and you are one step away from the official status of his girlfriend, consider what mistakes you need to avoid.
- Don't offer sex first. Even the shyest young man will find an opportunity to hint about his desire for a close relationship. Your initiative in this matter may simply frighten him away.
- Don't start serious conversations about your status in his life. Remember, men don't like to talk about relationships. They prefer to show their feelings through actions rather than words.
- Don't be intrusive. Don't forget, if isolation is a character trait of a young person, you are dealing with an introvert. And they need to periodically take a break from society. Be understanding about this feature and give your boyfriend personal space.
- Don't try to make him jealous on purpose. Men don’t like to sort things out, and introverts even more so. In addition, such behavior can dramatically change a guy's opinion of you in a negative direction.
Calmness is a hallmark of closed people. It guarantees the absence of constant scandals and quarrels. This is why girls love shy guys. If you behave correctly, you can build very comfortable relationships with such young people.
Strengths of Shy Guys
Many girls believe that a timid guy can be boring, therefore, without having time to properly get to know a modest person, they go in search of a self-confident “brutal”. Psychologists advise not to rush to conclusions, since a shy young man can turn out to be an excellent husband and a great father. A timid man has the following qualities:
- delicacy;
- courtesy;
- the ability to value relationships;
- affection;
- emotionality;
- the ability to feel your partner.
Among other things, timid men adapt to a woman in all areas of life, therefore they are especially well suited for powerful, strong personalities who cannot tolerate objections, as well as for anyone who would like to have a devoted and faithful life partner nearby.